Asking for needs on Shabbos Shiur with Rabbi Coren at Bais Medrash Ohr Chaim

Today we have delicious topic which is whether you're allowed to pray and davin and make bakashas on shabas kesh. One of the fascinating sh I actually heard someone ask this question many many years ago. His wife was um on the way to give birth shabas and there was a actually an preeie. they realize there's going to be a preeie and the question was do you say so a person is getting into the car usually also it could be an element of sak of danger not just because of the fact that it's the actual let's say he's going a distance outside of the the perimeters of the city but just the fact that it's a mat of sak do you say fascinating shah and the shahan from Melbourne. He actually has a a cha on this. So we'll get to it. What's really this question depends on the sh of asking for your needs on shabas is really not explicit. There's different sources you shi there's there's different sources how it's um it's learned out but the main shila is and it's really You have to you have to analyze. We we do know I think most people know you're not supposed to make requests on chabas. So question if you're allowed to do it even on rash that comes out on chabas. What about seems like we're making many requests but not only that in chabas we make requests. Let's say famous says is why you allowed to have once a month we do and we're making all these requests. So why says it's very difficult but the question is what does it depend on? So part of the we'll call it that what's the reason why you're not allowed to make requests on chabas. So one one way of looking at it is is that it's taking away from the and the ofas. If you're going to start thinking about the people that are sick and you're going to think about your job and you're going to think about the minus in the in the bank account and the bills and help me then shabas is not it's going to be like another week is like a weekday. So the pain itself is something that you don't want to have in chabas. That's one possibility. The other side, the other way to look at it, it's not because of the pain. It's because of the fact that just like you have a concept of your speech has to be different than it is during the week. Can't say speak the same way says that you shouldn't speak and best if you don't say anything. That's what they would. really it's not so crazy if someone's able to and his wife's okay and the kids okay and the sh's okay but uh only speak uh what what's necessary in chabas it's so holy it's a little bit of a concept that's not so known but that's that's the question if everyone got the questions then we could try to bring different proofs but that's the question is it because of the pain that I'm experiencing on chabas by asking for these things >> and Then obviously will be if like say you enjoy it or someone says I need it for therapy the cried when he sang when he sang you he read you he probably sang it right he was crying the taz discusses how is he allowed to cry in chabas not a cry in chabas he says no that wasn't a type of crying of sadness it's a crying of yearning that's the best therapy in the world so That's all part of the question. Someone's going to say if I'm not going to speak about this and I'm not going to cry to Hashem about it that I'm going to be in pain. I'm going to need my therapist. This is instead of therapy. Someone wants to do his but you going to tell me you can't do his tell of you're not skipping Shabas or didn't say you could skip Shabas every day you got to do an hour of his. So there's so many facets to this topic and there are sources believe it or not in both directions. There's a actually before that there's a shabas in Shabas says you go a person goes to visit a person that's sick he says not supposed to say the regular say the word is a very strange word once explained and I saw someone else explains this that it's not that you're saying the simple understanding is You're not allowed to You're not allowed to say for so what is this a trick? I'm not really allowed to say the is coming. Now the is is that you're giving to the person that's sick by telling him shabas I don't need to I don't need to cry out. It's it's it's removed from crying out. You know why? Because Shabas itself is is going to bring there for us. Shabas itself is for us but the isab like a language that we change from what we normally do. So the Gmorrah says different languages and he says you're allowed to do but not you say indirectly you're telling him that is going to come there's a that says that how many do we do in Shabas seven really it should be 18 or 19 the way we have it today within. He says the first three and last are the are the praise of Hashem. The others are requests. Listen to these words. Why can't you say a regular? Because a person's going to get to and he's going to remember that someone's sick and he's going to be pained. What an incredible seems to be saying clearly the first that the reason why you're not supposed to say all the different requests is because you should not get depressed. You should be happy. You should be enjoy enjoying yourself and thinking about these things is going to put a person in a in a in a sadness. That's why people don't realize you're not supposed to share information of what's going on in Israel or whatever it is unless there's a real benefit, a real tois. We'll see that maybe there's a reason why you may be able to if there's a danger that's imminent and therefore everyone's going to have to say to him. So we'll see. for example. But before we get to that, I just want to show you the other is there's a that says this is one of the main sources. You're not allowed to make your requests of what you need on Shabas. Can you say our shepherd please sustain us? Don't we say that in benching? So you are making requests and benching. So how did we just started with a whole discussion about the fa can't make any request we make plenty of requests for says it's the standard language of the blessings and therefore you're so what does that mean? One explanation to that is is that something that you're so used to saying unfortunately doesn't have the same awakening. is something unusual that's going to make a person suddenly become emotional in pain. The fact that it says I wish we would have kavana or wish you have kavana but that's why it's called the midra says explicitly. So it's interesting. It's a mid against the says but he's supposed to not be busy with seeking your desires that from here we learn make requests for your needs and shabas. So he gave him the same answer. So what do you see from here? That it seems to be that the reason why you're not allowed to make requests is because of the language itself. It's like so which one is it? Is it because you're not supposed to feel it and it's going to keep you in pain or is it because of the fact that your language should be different? And as I mentioned, there's many many if someone tells you for example that he's not going to have a he's going to be happy making these requests. So that's basically the shila. Another interesting and this is something that I've been asked many times is these requests. What is included in the list? What happens if a person says I want to finish? Well, you can't ask Hashem to finish us. I want to get closer to Hashem. >> And what happens by the fact first of all we say for the people that are sick. So technically speaking the people that are sick are really people that are in danger. Someone has you know his wife got up with a headache. So the husband comes his wife says don't forget me by doesn't work that way. Why not? So explains and really this is what some of the explain also is that really these both concepts are working together. It's really one. There's a concept that you should not be in pain on chabas. You should be in a state of enjoyment. You know why? Because shabas is it's a training for the world to come. And once the quotes he said that if someone is not training themselves to be misanic to enjoy and have delight in chabas then he's going to be a bench you know doesn't sound very good the way I always understood that sounds like the the guys on the basketball team you know there's the the guys that star and they're the ones is playing. Then there's the benchwarmers. Never get to be a bench warmer. I'm sorry. It's not Maybe they'll tell you the benchwmers. Oh, we we love it. We love it. But trust me, they want to be on the court. They want to be on the court. When I when I just got married, so my wife's um I think great great aunt. We went to visit her. So So she asked my wife, "What does your husband do?" So my wife said he's singing cola. Then when I got married, I was maybe one or two years maybe in close. So then I was already teaching. But so he so she said she was like more European. She goes, "Ah, benchwarmer [laughter] bench warmer." I was like, "What is she talking about? Bench warmers in basketball. I'm not a bench warmer." But I remember this the Kalina Kina says, "You don't want to be a benchwarmer. You want to be so excited on chamis." And because of that delight that you're experiencing in Shabas, the reward is going to be more delight in the world to come because that's your the one aspect of Shabas is don't allow to be in pain and therefore don't make requests that are not timely. But if something is timely, there's two reasons why you have to. Number one is because it's eminent. I got to take care of it. Number two, the pain of not reacting reacting to that trouble is also going to put a person in pain. Malaysia, for example, unfortunately this happened already too many times when news came that in Israel there's a war that broke out or that Iran's attacking whatever the situation is. You say to him, you say you get to not only that, you could even say because at this point it's eminent. You got to dab in a person's on his deathbread. That's when you d it's an imminent. And that's why he says someone is in in is is traveling. He wants to know if he should say of course you should say because right now is he needs to if it's something basically the the parameters are the gh is if it's something that you can wait till after shabas why are you doing it now? It must be something that's timely that you're allowed to. Number two is that again you see that really these both these concepts are working together and like we said has to be that it's so enjoyable. Number two is that our words themselves have to be chosen differently. The words themselves have an effect. The way I see it also is that what you speak about we all know the way a person speaks is really an expression of who they are. Words is are are coming from the soul. It says in the right my soul comes out with words. Why? Because the is the connection speech moral explains is the connection between the soul and the body. That's why his connection was so it was so um disconnected to some degree. That's what the moral explains that he was he had a difficulty speaking. So this is the of Shabas and when a person connects to this concept so then Shabas becomes the real delight and then based on what we're learning that's why you could say and that's why you could be on and be so within because once you tap into this shabas is different I have to get you in Torah anytime 7.0.