Before You React

”It's not you. It's me.” Is one of the most powerful things a parent can say. Rabbi Yisroel Grossberg, M.S. Ed., says: "I'm man enough to admit that I'm like a little kid. If I'm hungry, I'm kvetchy." So he tells his kids - let's talk after I eat. Because it's not fair to respond to them when we haven’t met our own needs. Whether it’s a few minutes to ourselves, a meal, or rest…whatever you need to restore your calm. And it goes both ways. When your kid comes home and they're a wreck over something small, they may need to eat before they can think straight or take a nap to reset. As Shira Berkowitz, LCSW, says: we need to learn to regulate before we have to regulate. Don't wait until you're in a crisis. Practice when things are calm. Ten deep breaths before you start your day. Go for a walk and notice what you see. It gives you the ability to regulate when the real moments hit - because your body already knows the way there.