Inside ArtScroll Episode 2: Rabbi Meyer Yedid

[Music] Hello everyone and welcome to Inside Arts Scroll where the books you read and the people who write them come to life. We are privileged to be joined today by Rabbi Mayor Yadid the Rashiva of YDE and the Rabbi of Sharetsion and the author of the new art scroll book the power of tranquility. Thank you Rabbi Yid for joining us. Pleasure to speak to you. My first question I have to ask you. I read in your book and I was astounded that you were born in Aleppo, Syria. You came to America at the age of nine not knowing a word of English. Tell me what that was like. And to think that however number of years later, you're not only a Rashiva and a rabbi, you've authored a book. Apparently, the language was not a barrier to your success. Walk me through that. First of all, thank you for having me on. I appreciate it. Um, it was a nice challenge. I would say that coming into a country that was different than what I've seen before. Uh the language was different, the customs were different, even Judaism was somewhat different than what we're used to. And uh the language barrier was certainly a big challenge, but you know, I guess uh when you're a young person, you just continue to work at it and try to get where you need to get to. Now, where did your family settle when they came to the United States? They settled in Brooklyn. In Brooklyn, right? And you went to yeshiva. I went to Magen David yeshiva which was at the time the only school in our community right so that was the community school my parents sent me my mother actually sent me there my father only came a year Oh wow afterwards yeah we were I'm the last of nine children okay and uh at some at one point we were dispersed all over the planet you know because everyone had to escape it wasn't that you can pick you know get on a flight and come together so but now we're all back together and at that point in your life who were the influential figures who inspired you whether it was in a synagogue or school or yeshiva at that point who who were the figures who you looked up to I guess at the at the age of nine I can't say there were many figures that that uh I thought about but uh definitely or later on perhaps yeah well that you know at a young age um definitely Rabbi Barim was was the rabbi of our our community right so he was someone that I would see often I actually see him in school as well. He taught in the school. Oh wow. So uh he definitely helped me a lot. And you got to speak to him personally. Yeah. I was actually when I came to this country I was considered an ui in in in the in the Judeaic area. Oh wow. In in the English area I was uh very behind. So he knew me very well from from the betesset. I was a popular boy there for for that. So he knew me very well. So he helped me out a lot during you know school. I had a lot of issues. you know, there were bullying issues. There were all types. You know, I'm the new kid that everyone could pick on. So, he was there to help me a lot. Now, in your book, you allude to a gamechanging moment in seventh grade. Tell us about that. Yeah. So, uh I remember it pretty pretty vividly. Um actually, I wrote it in the book about a moment that u I was always a good student. That was I guess one of the values that I grew up with in my home. My father was the chief rabbi of Syria. his yai was yesterday. Um and that was always the value in my home that the education you have to educate yourself. So coming into this country I continued that same trend. I was proud to be an educated person and did well. Uh but I guess certain American waves don't exactly agree with that. And uh I remember in seventh grade, you know, I'm trying to get to be a normal boy to learn the language to to do well in school. And I think it by seventh grade, from fourth grade to seventh grade, I got there. I was getting there. And then uh you know, one of the boys in in the in the uh class turned over to me and says, you know, he's such a goody goodie, you know, and and and uh it was very hurtful at the time. And uh it stayed with me for many years. I'm sure I'm not the only one. I teach Hashem today a lot of young men. And I see it's a real it's a real issue whether it's a goody goody or you know you're you're a rabbi or you're you know all these types of comments that seem to be very nice you know the words but the connotation obviously is negative. Did you use that as a source of selfm motivation or no no that drove me down for many years. Really? Yeah. Wow. Had you bounce back? Um, I guess over experience you start, you know, you start to grow up and you start to realize that, you know, the the the real values that you grew up with may be better than you thought. Sometimes you have to try to fit in with people, you know, trying to live the American dream. Maybe now Barashem is blessed that someone recognized the greatness that lay within and you know, you've gone on to become now a prominent rabbi and a rasha. How did that evolution happen? What was the process? I think um Barak Hashem I had a very very good upbringing in my home education wise. I always knew how to learn. I was always good in learning. Um when I when we came to this country, it was a very big adjustment for my family. My parents also were kind of lost. You know, they're much older. They're living in a new country, new everything. So I I don't know that I was myself forgotten but maybe neglected in a certain way because of their inexperience and uh over the years I was trying to you know fit in with the American culture whether it was sports or it was the community values. Um so I was fortunate to have a very strong Torah education always. Um and at the age maybe of 20 and 21 maybe those years I would say I started to uh really reconnect more. I never hashem was off or anything like that but I wasn't involved as much in Torah study like I should have been at the time. It wasn't so prevalent now community. We didn't have any yeshivas. So I wasn't like doing anything bad. But uh I would say I started to connect more to my father. I started to appreciate much more who he was. He was a very big he was a midsum and I started to connect to many of the values that today I feel obviously the real thing but it took some time for me to be able to hear them now once you started appreciating higher level Torah learning where were you able to pursue that? So I um so first of all the the I would say the course of events probably one of the biggest and most inspirational figures in my life not personally was Roy Vda Miller. Wow. Yeah. So uh happened to maybe stumble on the shul is not located far from not far your not far not far. Um rejoice o youth was a book that I had in my home. Wow. And uh for some reason I had picked it up one day and started to read it and it really opened my my eyes and ears to things that I guess were bothering someone like me but I never was able to speak it out articulate it and he just said it so beautifully and then he gave such clear answers where Miller Allah had a very clear way of expressing ideas that you walked away thinking how did I not understand that did you ever get to go to any of his classes? the lectures in person. I actually did, but I that that wasn't my biggest connection to him. It was through books or through recordings. I actually lived two doors away from his jewel after I got married on Ocean Parkway. On Ocean Parkway right there. Yeah. So, I was I was I had a little bit of a relationship with him, but that wasn't really the inspiration. It didn't come from my personal relationship. It was more through his writings and his words on cassettes. Wow. That's phenomenal. And we see how his writings and his recordings are still so popular today. many years after this Petira, many years after they were delivered. So we see that his legacy lives on and it's def definitely resonating with today's generation. Absolutely. Because you know his his like I said he's he's a man of EMTT. You could see that from his words. But I think even to me more importantly than that was that he had a certain clarity that the that the listener walked out having no doubt about what he just heard. Right? You know, and that's a that's a power that you're able to read somebody in a clear way. Now speaking of clarity, I would say that that's an attribute that I see in your book, The Power of Tranquility, describe the genesis of this volume and how it came about. So my my my trip, you know, in life, you mentioned before how how I got to learning. So I wasn't in business for many years and uh Barashem was a very successful business and at the age of I guess 23 just I got married I was learning a lot for I was learning as as a working man probably six seven hours a day really well yeah so I was I was I was learning a lot uh but I wasn't in a coh um I was you know had parasa I had to take care of my family and at some point there was an opportunity a new co opened up in Brooklyn and uh for some reason somebody asked me to uh why don't you go meet the rush kal and maybe I was you know people would see me I was learning all day on Sundays or whenever I had time I was learning so I actually went to meet the rash k and and I decided to make a big change in my life to to uh to learn to all day and who was that who was the rush k so the the co was open rabbi rabbi ozeri and rabbi David Sutton actually yad ysef is their synagogue in Brooklyn so it was housed in their in building and Rabbi Kamash is was the Rush Kell. Sure. Yeah. So I was privileged to meet him and he accepted me and uh we started my co life and I was there for seven years. Uh was you know tremendous time of my life. Uh I actually promised my wife never to teach because I thought I I would be able just to learn to you know just and I did that for a number of years and then certain opportunities came you know the passed away and uh you know the sh needed a rabbi. So for some reason I I was asked to to to lead and uh and we went from there. So I'm fortunate that I find myself in a place that I have a I have access to many many many people. I could speak to a thousand people on every every Shabbat. Sure. You know because the sh is very big. So I speak three four times and I've been doing this for for years and um because of that and I write everything down everything is safe and everything is kept and I I have thousands of you know essays that over the years from speeches shurum lectures things like that so is this book was actually written over you would say any number of years and then you selected your choice Torah thoughts to to to put in here. Exactly. Now the the theme of the book is the power of tranquility. How would you define tranquility? Tranquility I guess is a is a peace of mind is a is shalom. Peace is shalom, right? To be complete that the mind of a person is complete, right? You know what does that mean? It means they have clarity about uh where they want to be in life. It means they have clarity in understanding who they are as people. It's not enough to know where you want to go. You have to also know who you are because if you don't know where you are, there's no way to find out how to get to where you want to go. You know, it's like telling the uh the ways, you know, where you want to go, but it doesn't know where you are without putting in the address, right? So, so peace of mind means you understand where you want to get to. You understand who you are. You understand your struggles and and you you're at peace with yourself. You know, the human has a in an inner struggle. All of us are struggling with two forces inside of us. the part of us that wants to be great, the part of us that wants to to be inspired, the part of us that wants to accomplish and then the the lazy side of us and the the the tava side of us and we're constantly struggling every every minute of our day. We're struggling to make those good decisions. So we have an inner war that's so so shalom having shalom peace of mind or tranquility is really coming and bringing these kot together and they actually where the now becomes an assistant to you instead of being fighting you which is something that you know people say give me an example of that h how do you get the yetahara to become part of your team your ally so to speak how does that work I mean his job is to be ra so I give him very important example I think it's very relevant example and a person goes to the gym he gets inspired he wants to work out he wants to lose weight he wants to develop more muscles health purposes so you know he goes out and he buys all the clothing and he's ready to go and uh he goes to the gym and uh he realizes after a workout that this is hard work his muscles are hurting he's pushing himself way more than he thought he would. By the time he gets home after that workout, his body doesn't want to go back. The next day or the next time around, his body says, "Stay home." His mind says, "Don't you want to be healthy? Don't you want to be strong?" His body says, "I'm tired." But guess what? If you keep going, if you keep going once and twice, after three months, six month, we know people, I'm sure you know people that have been working out, whether it's jogging or running or weights, that after a year, they can't stop. Their body doesn't even let them stop, right? That means the the that side of us, if you just keep pushing it, it becomes so much part of you. Becomes part of you. So, yeah. You have a hard time learning, you have a hard time doing kindness, you have a hard time. Yes. But if you keep pushing yourself, now you have an ally with you. So peace of mind comes when a person is able to utilize those and bring them together. Right now we we live in a chaotic world, a confused world. you know more than anyone working in the ravenet and in so you see really the spectrum of confusion and uncertainty from all ages. Why do you think that is? Why today is there so much uncertainty and confusion or or am I wrong about that? First of all, you're not wrong. There's definitely a lot of confusion. I can't measure what was a hundred years ago as I didn't live 100 years ago. I imagine life used to be much more simple. So therefore, probably the confusion was much more much less simple. uh much less rather um you know look there's there's obvious there's obvious reasons technology the the the the speed of how everything runs in this world fastpaced world were open to so many people you know growing up a 100 years ago you grew up in your city you knew your father mother your siblings you knew your family your neighbors your community that's who you were exposed to those were your heroes that's all you could choose from. Today you have 8 billion people that you're exposed to. So obviously that can cause a lot of confusion. Um you know social media hurts a lot when people are living in a virtual life. Um and just general general issues you know today we have a world that people don't work as hard as they used to and therefore they have a lot more free time on their hand which we know that bul you know when the person has no has too much free time that it could be very dangerous. So a lot of that a lot of those things coming together in our generation which is very unique obviously has caused a lot of confusion both by parents and by children. So you know somebody told me a very appropriate statement. You know we opened the yeshiva about 10 years ago and uh someone told me a few years ago he says you know I wish we opened the yeshiva for the parents and send the ch left left the children at home which is true. You know as parents what we do has translates over to our children. So there is a lot of confusion and a book like this I think really tries to go into the roots of how a person can be strong at the end of the day if there's confusion in the world that doesn't mean you're going to be confused. For example, nobody makes you angry. You got angry because of somebody. Nobody annoys you. You decided to be annoyed. So also confusion. Just because it's a confusing world, it doesn't mean that a person can't find that clarity in their own life and look around and say, you know something, this is ridiculous. Because Hashem gives us the power to control our emotions, to control what we do, and perhaps most importantly to control how we react to things. And I think that's what I got out of the book that we're really in control if we want to be. We just have to learn the tools. And the book really provides so much of that inspiration. Absolutely. Is there any particular message or story in the book and there are tons of great ones that stand out to you that you would share with our viewers and listeners? There's so many parts to the book that have really nothing to do with each other, but when you put them together as a package, they make a beautiful story. So, there's I think the part on anger that was the end of the book, there are four essays on anger which are life-changing. I've had many many people over the years and over the last few months after the printing this book that have reached out to me how their life has changed because they were able to realize that they are angry much more than they thought they were uh and they got the tools to be able to deal with it. You know, one of my favorites uh is the is the is the the essay about the teenage years. Mhm. How um you know a person what what are the struggles of the teenage years? Where are the potholes of those years? Sometimes there are small things in our lives that we don't realize that they're really the block of where we need to get. So the confusion in our mind doesn't allow us to see clarity. Look at the end of the day you know the the asks a question. The says how come a camel has a short tail. Shabbat. And the says because the camel lives in area where there's thorns. So if it had a long tail, it will keep getting stuck in the thorns. The gra says, "How come an ox has a long tail?" So say, "Oh, because he lives in the swamp and he's got all kinds of flies coming on his back. How how is he going to get rid of them?" You know, the point of that gimmar is that Hashem gives every creation the tools that they need to succeed in their life. That we can be sure about. Hashem, you know, we we look to be inspired from others. We look to learn from others, which we always need to. But ultimately, most of the solutions are really inside of us. Hashem has given us the wisdom and the access to the right people and to the right books. Hashem will not put us in a world where we will not be able to see clarity and do what we have to do. The only issue is if our mind is not calm. If our mind is not at ease, we lose access to that information. We're like drunkards. A drunkard has all the wisdom right there. But they're right now drunk. So if a person doesn't have peace of mind, they're really walking around the world in a way that a drunk walks around and they lose access to that light that that shines up the darkness of this world. So whether we're young obviously we're very confused as teenagers are by nature confused for so many reasons but that doesn't necessarily get better when we get older. So all aspects of life they need we need that peace of mind to get that clarity. You know the says says that this is where we need to get out our aod is to get to peace of mind. I think he means that once you have peace of mind the world is open to you. The decisions are easy. It's obvious. Of course, you're not supposed to do that. Of course, you're not supposed to say that, but you got to be first at peace. You mentioned before that you promised your wife you wouldn't go into teaching. Yes. I'm wondering if you promised your wife that you wouldn't go into the raven because I'm not sure which one would be more timeconuming and overwhelming. But I must ask you, you have a tremendous congregation. You have a flourishing yeshiva. How do you carry that that responsibility? had you have so much coming at you. I'm sure it's with the support of of your wife, but but what's the secret to balancing that? I speak to Rabonim. I have a brother who's a RV. It's a full-time job. So, how do you do that? I I think that's a a great question and relevant to the book. You know, peace of mind is the ability to live the moment. very disturbing to the mind is when we are constantly living in the future where we're worried about tomorrow. What's going to be tomorrow? What's going to be next month? What's going to be my children? Am I going to get married? Am I going to make money? Am I going to be the person I'm going to be? So, when we worry about the future, it disturbs our peace of mind. thinking about the past either wishing the past was here again or you know thinking twice about why did I do that I wish I would have done that all the wishful thinking disturbs that peace of mind they say the famous words of the past is gone the future is not here the moment is right here if a person is able to live the moment to become a very powerful person because we have a limited amount of strength that Hashem gave us. It's a lot of strength but it's limited when we spread it over the future and over the past. So our kot our strength is is really taken away from us in the current in the in the current situation that I'm in. So I think that the most important way to accomplish in life is to live the moment that you're in. Of course you live with a vision. Of course you live with a target. But you never worry about the next class. You never worry about the next project. You worry about what you're doing right now. You know I always tell the the the boys I teach teenage boys. I'm very privileged to teach boys in high school. And I tell them that multitasking people think is when you could do a lot of things at one time. I said it's a very big mistake. That's not what a multi a multitasker is someone who knows how to do one thing at a time. But do it well and then move on to the next thing. When you do something well and move on, Hashem just keeps giving you. You don't have to worry about the next thing. So really, I never really thought if you ask me about how many things I'm doing and what what am I doing next year, that's it's really not a I know what I'm doing right now. Right now I'm sitting with you and we're having a nice interview and discussing the book. That's why I have to worry right now. When we finish this, we go on to the next thing. And if we live life that way, I believe that we we're able to focus our energy in in life itself and be much more accomplished. Now, you've been able to spread your or spread your positive messages through speaking. You're a popular speaker, magir of organizations, yeshivists, things like that. And you've also spreading your message through writing. Which one do you find more effective? And which one do you find more challenging? That's a great question. It's a great question. I don't know if I've thought about that the way you said it, but that's why you do what you do. I like that. Um, there are some questions without answers, you know. No, no. I I I think as a as I I heard you ask the question, first of all, you know, I believe that like most people that inspiration is limited. As a speaker, to me, it's not when I speak in front of a crowd, my goal is not to entertain them. My goal is not even to have them inspired. My goal is that they should do something after they walk away from that inspiration. If tell everyone tells me, you know, great job, we really enjoyed it while it makes you feel good that people enjoyed what you say. But to me, that's not that's not an accomplishment. Accomplishment is that did a person do something to change his life? Is after he walks out, is he going to go open a book and start learning? Is he going to go now respect his parents more? If if we don't get people to actually do something from the inspiration. So we really haven't you know we occupied their time they listen to a nice year which has its value you know hashem appreciates even the smallest step that we take but the real you know the the real success from my perspective is that when a person really does something to change in his life. So inspiring people is important because sometimes to get them to that to that point, you got to inspire them. But it can't be just inspiration. You got to measure your success. Are people changing in your life? Are the people around you making now new strides to become better people? If you're just coming to Yeshir and they're walking out the same way and they're not doing anything, so we haven't done anything. So I think to answer your question, I think inspiring speaking is the least important. Mhm. But I think sitting in front of a and learning is the most important because nothing changes a person more than learning. And when you're able to put something in print, to me, it's it's the combination of the two. Because in a book like this, we're able to inspire people by speaking their language. But at the same time, because it's in print, it stays in their head a lot longer. They could review it. They could come back to it. Sure. an inspiring uh lecture. You can't you don't have that for sure. We're sitting here in beautiful Arts Girl studios at Arts Girl headquarters. We're I would say one of our mottos is that the written word is forever. A book is eternal. It also has tremendous reach reaching people all over the globe. So there's no question that the book has an element where it's able to reach far beyond the confines of a finite number of people sitting in front of you. And that's why this book is just a blessing to Israel. I want to thank you for taking the time to come here to continue inspiring Jews all over the world whether it's in your position as a rabbi of a wonderful congregation as a rabbi in yeshiva and you should continue to keep spreading those messages of positivity and tranquility for many years. Amen. Amen. It was a pleasure to be here with you. I enjoyed talking to you. Hopefully we'll have more discussions in the world. Looking forward to the next book. Okay. Thanks again. Thank you. Thank you very much.