Bitachon 251 - Our Merits Protect Our Children

You're listening to the 251st edition of the Be Talking podcast. We're going to study together passing in Mishlei. In Proverbs chapter 14 verse 26, "Be your Hashem mivtach oiz." When a person has yiras Hashem, when a person has awe and reverence of heaven, reverence of Hashem, then he has a powerful thing that he can trust in. He's He has a powerful guarantee. "U'l'vanav yihyeh machseh." And not only is this true for the person themselves, it's also true for the children, for that person's children. And here [snorts] we come to a very powerful and what would seem to be secondary, but I don't think it's secondary, concept that has to do with bitachon, and it has to do with not only the impact on ourselves, our personal lives, as a result of living with bitachon, but it has to do with the impact that it has on our children. And of course, it's true in a most simple sense, in a pashut p'shat sense, because if I'm working on bitachon, if I'm speaking about bitachon, if I'm living in a place where Hashem is real in my life, so that clearly has an impact on my children. They hear it spoken about. They start to see it in me, and they start to see it in themselves. But as all of the meforshim explain, and perhaps what we just said is a mechanism of it, but the fact that I am working on my bitachon, the fact that I am developing a true relationship with Hashem, as represented by bitachon, it is an incredible z'chus for me. It's an incredible merit for me and my kids. All of those who are in my vicinity are affected by it, especially my children. So, let's see together some of the ideas that are brought here. Be'er Avraham Yitzchak Oise. Rashi says, "Ne'emar be'Avraham, ki ata yada'ati ki yerei Elokim ata." Avraham Avinu, Hashem says to him, "I can now tell I know now that you fear heaven, that you revere me." "U've'ir choleich ki vareich avarechecha." Hashem promises as a result that he will bless him. And what does blessings really mean? What are blessings? It means that we see that everything that we need is given, is taken is taken care of. And sometimes a a nature that's above nature, in a manner that's above nature. "U'vanacha yiyu yiyahu machaseh." Right? [snorts] And I'm It doesn't say this explicitly in Rashi, but I'm extending it, that Avraham Avinu's promise wasn't just to him, but that also his children would be blessed. And we are all his children. "U'vanacha yiyu machaseh." Your children, as this pasuk says, Hashem will be a protector, "she'chasui scavi betzel chusai." They will have upon whom to rely because of the shade, the protection of his merit. When a person trusts in Hashem, so that merit, that that positive thing that they've done has an impact not only on themselves, but on those around them. He brings here from the Sefer Das Chochma U'Mussar. "Be'avar bo orech ohr ein da'avneisi levanav." He explains at length the concept that a father carries the children. Right? It's not so hard to understand this. Let's see his explanation. When it says midbar is the kind of love We're going to quote a few of the ideas, a few of his words. In this manner, there is a a common saying. One father can carry 10 sons. But 10 sons cannot carry even one father. When I come to my It's a very true statement. The way that a father carries his sons Cuz that is the truth that a father carries his children. But not so much in the love. In the simplest sense, right? A father he has to be the one to provide. He carries all of the children. He has to have a livelihood which is enough to provide for all of the needs of his wife, his kids. How much he gives him is because of The children get everything that they have in the merit of the father. If the father wouldn't be around, they wouldn't If the father wouldn't be around, they wouldn't have all of this. The father gives them everything that they have because of The father in his love makes available to them their livelihood. He clothes them. He feeds them. Beautiful. And he pours out on them an influx of compassion. Father has compassion on his kids. Father should love and have mercy. Now, you have to be careful. Don't think that the father is actually the one who's carrying his kids, right? The father is the king. Right? Heaven forbid to say this cuz then it just looks like hey, it's my strength, my power that's doing it. Right, and that's denying that Hashem is the one who's actually doing it. Hashem, God in his great kindness, gives the father one of the needs for his children. But in any event, when we look in a superficial way, so the father is the one carrying his kids. So he says this means to say really important. The merits of the father are that which carries the children. I can't help but think that it's the sense of responsibility. Right? A child, all they're really concerned about is themselves. They're selfish, that's normal, that's human, that's how we're born. Until we develop and grow and become greater as an individual. But the very act of responsibility of a parent bringing a child into the world, that's a commitment to providing for and taking taking care of that child. So that itself, that having a sense of and a commitment to not being self-centered on the part of the parent is a great merit. It becomes He becomes a channel for goodness to come through into his kids. That's what I think is maybe the p'shat in what it means it's a z'chus. The parent, through their merits, the word z'chus means actually purification, zachus. Right, zach means pure. So it's a purification. When I purify myself, which means to say I get rid of myself, and I become other-centered, so then I merit to be a channel for Hashem's influx into the world. Klaus Emes Rabbi Gashmi scheme Gamarnis. This is not only true in a person's physical sense in a physical sense, but also in spiritual matters. Abner says upon him, him in Gashmi and Raxmi. The father carries the children whether it's in his physical aspect or in his spiritual aspect. And I would say that the children sense that. Like yesterday I got on the phone with my son. He asked me, "What did I learn about that morning?" That's a child wants to hear inspiration from the parent. It's our responsibility as parents. And if we're children, we need to know that we are going to have that responsibility. We got to fill ourselves up now cuz we're going to have to give it over to our kids, to your kids. Are you going to be Shamayim and about them schools for him? When it comes to a person's as well, I as a parent based on the calculations of heaven, I get merits and life for my children. And he brings a proof of this from the opposite. You'll be ugly how you make up with cloud. And if not for the father, the children would not get anything at all. It's very interesting. But I won't be able to tell you about Mason. Who learns this in Shabbos? And that's why I made him a base. That as a result of the sin of not being Torah focused, of not spending time studying, of wasting time that could have been spent learning, so little children heaven forbid can die. I wish about this of the notion about we find that as a result of the sins of a father, the children who are dependent on the father, meaning spiritually dependent, and merit-wise dependent on the father, so the children can be ill-affected, they can be punished. It doesn't seem to make sense. Why would a child be punished for something the parent has done wrong? That's not the child. The child didn't do anything wrong. And the answer is because the truth is the father is the one who carries the children. And obviously we can deduce from our sages that the opposite is also true. When a father has the merit of Torah study, so the children also they inherit life. with schusum And they inherit merits. Because if we can talk about it in a negative sense, so the positive sense the positive sense is always greater. me the toiva maruba The the measure of something good is always greater than whatever you see in the negative sense. Because that is really the true the true way that things go. And the father carries the children. So if I am properly learning Torah, so then I'm giving my children life. And they have an incredible merit and life both in spirituality and in physicality because of the merits of the father. So this is if you think about it, it's an incredible responsibility that each and every one of us has. We can't only be concerned about ourselves and our own roughness. And it's also something that is encouraging to know that when you work on your talking yourself, you might not see it around you. You might not see it. Your kids might not be on that level. But we need to know that our school is we're working on this. It has It's a watershed. It's a watershed that that allows the the the spiritual influx to go down to our kids. Such an important idea. Okay, that's the dust off of the master. Let's see some more. The Rabag says in explaining our possuk. Yishuv Tavo Yisborach She tell you who you are a sham. A person should trust in Hashem's power. That Hashem will save the person who fears him. I need to know that when I revere and and stand in awe of Hashem and respect Hashem and try to do Hashem's will, so then I can trust that Hashem will take care of me and save me. God living in Yesha is the Mogan of Max and them. The children of that person as well, Hashem will also protect them. And he will also be one to whom they can turn. This is a view. In the merit of their father. And they will be protected from any evil that might befall them. That's the Rabag. The Imrei Emet says, Bavui Hashem Hashem Mivtacho. As a result of the fear of Hashem, Hashem will be the one in whom we can rely. Mivtacho is a powerful one to trust in. Liyore, to the one who fears him. Lemali beis tzarosav. To be able to escape at the time of his difficulty Ulavonav b'siyata d'Shmaya shall also be a protector for his children. Next blessing says I'm going to explain this here as well. I'll just read to you the passage. The sermon is over. The fear of Hashem is the source of life. To be able to turn away from any death traps. Okay? It's the fear of heaven. It's the focus on trying with all of our heart to do Hashem's will. That's what protects us from any kind of danger. Fear of Hashem is the source of life to the to the one who fears. It will save him from death traps. What are the death traps? Enough said. And those are the sins. Okay? So, I think, you know, the death traps themselves are just physical manifestations of the spiritual death traps. Which are the sins which are turning away from Hashem. When we pray the brocha says in base that when we diving so we bow on the word baruch. Atah and then we straighten up when we say Hashem's name, Hashem. Atah is baruch and Hashem. Why do we do this? Why do we bow when we say the word baruch which means blessed? And why do we stand up straight when we say the the name of Hashem? It makes you Korea. Because when a person bows more than I ever used to before enough. Here's something to think about when we diving. When you bow, baruch atah Adonai So, [snorts] what you're doing is you're saying I I bow to you, Hashem. I have fear of you, Hashem. I I I submit myself to you, Hashem. U'she'za'keif And when a person stands up, what's that about? More I'll be talking she has my boy. And it's interesting. I I remember hearing from our Yeshiva Rabbi Perr he once passed by a group of Muslims who were praying on the beach in Far Rockaway. He saw them all down on all fours. Which is how they pray. And we do that obviously on Rosh Hashanah and Kippur. But he pointed out that the the tefillah that we do is the Amidah. We stand. Right, our tefillah in front of Hashem is standing cuz Hashem wants people not just he wants us to of course to surrender to him, to completely give ourselves in, but he wants us to be somebody. To be human beings, partners with Hashem. Proud in a certain sense that we are his people. Right, that's the tzurah, the way that our tefillah looks. And but here's the an added depth to it that Rav Yonah says, that when I stand up after I say baruch atah Adonai, I'm showing I fear you, Hashem. I bow to you, Hashem. Hashem, I stand up to show that I have absolute faith in you, Hashem. Now that I Now that I'm in a space of yirah, now that I'm in a in a space of respect so then I can have she'eishin ba'kol inyanav she'yeish lo. I'm absolutely confident. I stand up straight. I'm confident that Hashem is going to do good for me. That Hashem is going to provide me with my needs. U'zeh talui ba'zeh. And this depends on this. Shemi'sha'ar me'Hashem Yisbaruch u'mitabei'ach bo. The one who fears Hashem also knows that he can trust in Hashem. Ki yesh ner Yiras Hashem mivtacho iz. He He our pasuk. With Yiras Hashem, a person feels that he has a powerful one upon whom to rely. Brings here from another place in the in the Rabbeinu Yonah. He says that even though generally speaking, a person who's afraid it's the opposite feeling from being confident. When you're afraid, you don't trust. It's you're afraid what's going to be. Yiras Hashem and Yiras Bitachon Liyirah. But fear of Hashem is different than a fear of uh danger. The fear of Hashem brings a person to have a confidence in Hashem. And not only does that person trust in a way that he doesn't expect any negative thing to befall him, but he feels that he has strength himself. He has this powerful confidence. If you do the bone of tile, you rise up. This doesn't only help the person himself, but it helps his kids as well. Interestingly, he points out that this is going to help the children, but it's not at the same level as the parent. The children also need to work on it. Why? Because Machseh, the word Mem Ches Samech Hey, which means a protector. Hashem is the protector of his kids. That, as we've pointed out previously, is a different a lower level than Bitachon. Bitachon is absolute confidence. Machseh is like Hisayon is I believe he's going to help me. I think he's going to help me. I I feel he's going to help me. But it's not that absolute confidence. So, the parent has the confidence, the child has a child also has a certain level of trust, but it's and it works for him. But it's not the same. Kids also have to work on it. A person who's righteous so he goes in his simplicity and his simple trust of Hashem, praiseworthy are his children after him. Right, it's in parshas Noach. Noach was saved, his children were saved. When a person does good, we need to know that when we are trying to align ourselves with Hashem's will, so we are also gaining a merit for our children. Right, the pasuk says Hashem does kindness to 1,000 generations, lo iseh me'ah av. To those who do out of love. Well, it's thousands. The first one is thousands. If we do it out of love, we serve Hashem out of love, right? It's a higher level than the yirah that we're talking about here. Talking about fear. Love is on our level, it it affects thousands of generations. But those who keep his mitzvos, which is a denoting the aspect of yirah, so it's a thousand. To those who do it out of fear. Right? Each one according to that which is next to him. He brings that the merit of the parent helps for the kids. As our pasuk says, those who fear Hashem, they are guaranteed and it helps their children as well. Brings here from the Gra, two more small pieces and then we'll be finished. Yiras Hashem As a result of a person's fear of heaven, Hashem promises him good is going to be done for him. When Hashem a guarantee, he's an absolutely powerful guarantor. And even to his own children, did not make that promise directly, they will also be protected. Lord of hosts will protect them as well. And finally brings here from the morale, What does it mean that a person is fears means that a person recognizes that is the root. is the cause and I'm the effect. The only way that I have any existence is because of the one giving me existence. That's how says in 21 verse 27, that the fear of him adds years to a person's life. But the evil one, a wicked person is disconnected, so he doesn't have life. He's disconnected from his source. So he has short days. What this means to say is that a person who has the fear of heaven, the issue go more because he recognizes that he's absolutely dependent, he's just an outcropping of him. So that person deserves to get existence from who's the source of his existence. He says in 21 verse 27, that's why the fear of gives a person days. And also says our verse, Again, our verse accentuates this point that a person by fearing heaven, recognizing that it's Hashem who is his source of livelihood, source of all the things that he has. So, that guarantees that Hashem will help him. He will be that powerful one upon whom he can rely. It's not only something that helps him, but it helps his children after him as well. And so, because he recognizes who is the source of his key on, so then Hashem, who's the source, gives him existence. Not only to him, but to all those. It's like me to connect to me. It's when you recognize who your antecedent is, so then those who come from you, in a certain sense, they're connected into you because they come from you. You recognize who you come from. Because the root the the the the trunk of the tree gives power to the tree. And that's how the branches also get their existence from the root itself. Thank you so much for listening. We'll see you again next time.