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Bitachon 249 - As The Missiles Fall

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Ari Goldwag Torah avatar
Ari Goldwag Torah

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You're listening to the 249th edition of the B Talkin' podcast. We're studying together the possuk in Mishlei, Proverbs chapter 3 verse 5, perek gimmel possuk hey. Bitach el Hashem b'chol libecha. Trust in Hashem with all of your heart. V'al ti shaein al binatcha. Don't lean on your own wisdom, your own intuition. He brings here from the Gra, which as I've mentioned previously, is the beginning of Darkei Bitachon of the of the Alter of Novardok. He also brings the right at the beginning, so it's a chazarah. We're going over this idea. Bitach el Hashem b'chol libecha, ein us sheyeilech b'shalem b'minyan bitachon. V'al ti shaein al binatcha. The Gra instructs us, have your heart all the way in. Have your heart all the way into bitachon. Not partially in. No partial stories when it comes to bitachon. Your heart has to be all in. It's an emotional thing. It has to do with my emotions, my feelings. V'al ti shaein al binatcha, shelo timer eftach b'Hashem. Don't say, "I'm going to trust in Hashem, ach ani muchrach lasos l'shain gam al sichli." Well, look, I still have to do things. I still have to depend on my own wisdom. I still have to A person has to make his way in life. Don't speak that way. Don't don't go that way, says the Gra. L'chayn, omer she al ti shaein v'afilu b'toras mashainas l'yochal l'chasech l'cha. Don't lean, right? We're going to see later, I don't know if we'll get to it this week, but don't even lean. Leaning, right? Ein lanu al mi l'hishaein ela al Avinu sheb'shamayim. It's a famous song. We have no one to on whom to lean except for Hashem, our Father in Heaven, right? But leaning is not the same. If I lean on something, it's not necessarily that I'm putting my full weight on it, right? I'm leaning on it. A machine is a walking stick. It's not the same as I'm being carried by somebody. When it comes to my wisdom, don't even lean on it. Says the girl, don't even lean. Don't even put your faith in your mind even a little bit. Put your whole heart, all of your emotions, complete faith in Hashem. Let me tell you about Hashem with all your heart. Rather trust in Hashem with all of your heart. Bring it here on the bottom. Two things. One is from the Mar'eh Disk in and one is from the Hagah, which is Rav Menachem Mendel Mishklov, the talmid of the Gra, in explaining what the Gra is talking about. He brings here the Kedushas Mar'eh Disk in maybe in my Gra of Zera Shimshon. Brings from the Gra of Zera Shimshon, The idea here is to have complete bitachon. Full-on confidence and trust in Hashem. Don't do anything on your own. You don't have to do any hishtadlus, contrary to popular popular belief. Just trust in Hashem. Don't do anything. You don't have to do anything. Like Hezekiah, our sages tell us, what was his battle plan? Should I swallow all the garbage and dive into Hashem? I'm going to sleep. I'm going to sleep now even though my enemies are surrounding me, and you Hashem are going to do that which needs to be done so that my enemies will fall on their own. That's the Mar'eh Disk in. Okay, obviously this is a very high level. But it's something to shoot for. It's something to know that it's there. We'd like this. We would like this. Now again, he brings from the Hagah in the Gra. When Mishkalov says this is what I heard in the name of the Gra. Al masham Gra. About that which it says in the Gemara Rosh Hashanah, "Lo yihave yadi rabbonon mayahavcha." The pasuk says "Hashlech al Hashem yahavcha." Throw your burden onto Hashem. So, Chazal didn't know what the word yahav means. We know what it means, a burden. We're just going to see how they knew it. But Chazal were not sure exactly what this word means. And we'll see what it means that they weren't sure. Ad d'azo Rabba bar bar Chana b'darei tuna. It's Gemara Rosh Hashanah that "Khaval umnei is." It's also in another place, other places. Rabba bar bar Chana was a great sage. And he was carrying a package on his back. He had a a heavy load. Avih azil l'akharei ataya. There was a particular Arab uh maybe a donkey driver or camel driver that was with him. Avih azil ataya. Shkal yahavcha v'shadi agmalai. The Arab says to him, "Take your take your package and throw it onto my camel." So, yahavcha is the word that he used, which means your package. And and he knew what he was carrying. He was carrying some kind of bag, some kind of suitcase. So, we learn from there that the word yahavcha "Shlach al Hashem yahavcha." You have a heavy burden, you have a heavy suitcase, all your stuff is in there. Take it and give it to us shove. Now, the girl says, as quoted by Menachem it can't be didn't know what the word you have means, that it means a package. And that um Arab driver knew. Actually, what's going on here is a deeper thing. That had a question when it comes to be talking, what is the proper approach when it comes to trusting in a shove? We have to shove a shove shove. I trust that maybe this is one possibility. I trust in my mind. Meaning, I do things based on my intuition and based on my own understanding. And I trust that is going to do that which is good for me. You know, it'll work out or it won't, but it's going to be good. It's going to be right. Oh, shamelessly shamelessly shamelessly, but the other possibility is no, I don't do anything. I don't even depend on my own mind at all. I just go whatever you want. Whatever you want. From beginning to end. I don't even engage my intellect in this whole pursuit. Well, I'm rule. Right, so and what does it mean on the shove shove throw on to shove your package? What does it mean throw on to shove your package? Does it mean I have a package and I have a way of doing things and I let us shove be the one who directs it or does it mean that I completely give up anything that I think, right? That's the two understandings of that possible. Originally, they thought that a person should certainly makes sense. We live in this world, do what you think. And uh do whatever needs to be done. I'll keep the conversation with Hashem, but also trust in Hashem. Trust in the name of Hashem. So, the word package the package or the suitcase that has all my stuff in it it's not exactly the right word to use. Throw onto Hashem your package. Throw onto Hashem your needs. Let Hashem be in charge of providing you with everything that you need. Throw onto Hashem everything the whole package. So, that was their question in the possuk. Why does it use that word? One time they saw this story with Rabbi Bar Bar Chana that he was carrying this package. Now, Rabbi Bar Chana should have had to pay for the Arab driver the camel driver to put his package onto the camel. Usually, you have to pay for a service. But, that's not what happened in the story. He didn't even have to ask for anything. He didn't ask the guy. He didn't even have to pay. Listen to this. He says to him take what you need. Take your I'm sorry. Take your own money. The money that you would think you're going to have to pay. Take that money. And take your package and put it onto my camel. So We see from here that sometimes a person can need something. And usually, you have to pay for that service. So, if Hashem determines, and I'm adding here, if I have the proper bitachon, it helps it sway in this direction. But if Hashem determines, I'm not going to even have to pay for the service. >> [sighs and gasps] >> The location just like what happened with the with this Arab driver. Rav Brechanah had a package, he needed help with it. The Arab driver was the one who even asked him, "Can I help you with your packaging? Don't even You don't even need to pay," he said. The location shaar shapper milas Yakovcha. Okay, I'm getting a an indication that there might be a uh a uh siren in the next few minutes, so I'm going to probably pause the video, but let me just finish what I'm saying here. So, in kein a feel of a much older certainly tell a chaver be out of order. He has been a shamash to come to your house and ask you to do a shiur, so the kein shaar shapper milas Yakovcha. So, therefore, it makes sense to use the word "your package," kal vachomer. Avidasha to certainly ask for a car about that. Even something which requires ordinarily that you that you pay for. You have been a shamash to ask for a class to come to your house. Hashem can make it that you're not even going to have to pay. They're going to request from heaven. I'm sorry. They're going to somebody they're going to direct it from heaven that you're they're going to someone's going to request to do you a favor without you having to pay. We'll have to understand this. So, it's a powerful and important thing to know about bitachon that bitachon can be something that's completely completely disconnected from how I think it should be or any of my own efforts. That's completely possible. And the highest level, very high level. But one that we are to seek, one that we are to try to go after. All right, we're continuing here in my garden because I spent an hour running back and forth >> [gasps] >> into protected areas. And then having buzzers again. So I'm back home. And we're going to continue here with Hagay Mayor Bloch who says like this, he brings a possuk later on in Mishlei, the same perek, yeshur negdecha. Your eyelids will cause you to be straight in front of you. What does this mean? You have a situation in your life. You don't know what to do. Right? The eyelids, of course, cover your eyes. So they represent the situations in life where we don't know what to do next. Don't be afraid at this moment to close your eyes. Close your eyes. Right? Well, as long as my eyes are open, it means I'm trying to figure out what to do. Try and figure out what to do next. Close your eyes. Stop trying to figure out what to what to do next. Be assured that your eyelids, as they're closed, will help you go on the straight path. Even if you're walking along even if you're walking along and your eyes are closed. There are times in life where you can't you can't really figure out what to do. It's impossible to figure out what's what's the right next thing. Put all of our shame behind in those moments. We need to trust in our shame with all of our heart. So, you might ask, well, if I stop depending on my heart, what do I do? What do I do? How do I How do I move forward if I don't know what to do? If I don't depend on my own intellect. And I think that what it's calling us to do, what the passage is asking for us to do, and what's implied here is don't think about it so much. Don't try to figure it out so much. Don't use your intuition so much. Don't use your Don't use your intellect so much. We think that our intellect and our intuition are that which helps us to figure out what to do. Quiet it all down. Quiet it all down. And now inside of your heart, there's a voice that's speaking and it's not your intuition. You know your intuition sounds like. It might be a feeling. And there's a voice. It's not the voice of your mind. The mind we know what it sounds like. That's the noisiest part of ourselves. But if we quiet that down, there's a different voice which we call the called the mama daka. A voice that's very It's It's almost doesn't move at all. Called the mama damon means it doesn't move. It's very fine. That's the voice we're looking for. Try to figure out figure out what is Hashem. What's Hashem's will for me in this moment? That's different than what do I think I need to do in this moment? That's different. What do I think Hashem wants me to do in this moment? That's harder to discern. But that's what we're after. That's what we're trying to find. We're trying to figure out what does Hashem want for me to do in this moment? That's the talk of Hashem with all your heart. Put your whole heart into trusting in Hashem. Trusting in I would say that Kar Hashem when he sees us calling out to him if I say Hashem, please help me know what to do next. Hashem, please help me. Guide me to do what's what's the next thing that's that you want me to do. I'm going to find a different answer than if I try to think about what I should do. Cuz I'm getting out of my mind. My mind is my problem. My thoughts, my beliefs, those are often my problem. And of course, when I'm trying to get the das of the Torah, trying to understand Hashem's will more and more, so I more and more am aligning my heart with Hashem. I'm more and more in getting to the will of Hashem. Brings it from the Marsha and Brachot on daf hey. The sh'mo choli b'chol libavcha, ainu t'fillah he says. What does it mean to trust in Hashem with all of your heart? It's a reference to prayer. K'mo she kasav, eizeh avodah she b'lev? The Gemara the or the K'mo she matzinu maybe, the Gemara in Taanis on daf beis amud alef says, what is the avodah which is in the heart? What is the service of Hashem which we do with our heart? Havei amei zu t'fillah. Which is interesting because it's very easy to get lost. Our our t'fillah, we say the same words over and over again. I don't know if it's referring specifically to the Amidah, to the to the davening that we do from a siddur, or if it just means the the regular prayers that we pray to Hashem, the daily prayer as we're walking through life and we're reminding ourselves that Hashem is in charge. But it's an avodah she b'lev. Right? It's something that goes on in my heart. B'tach Hashem b'chol libavcha. Trust in Hashem with with of your heart. This means daven. What does it mean to daven? We've mentioned this before, and we're going to mention it again. Davening doesn't just mean Hashem, give me what I want. It means I recognize that the only one who can get me what I I'd rather say the word what I need cuz I don't really know what I need. The only one who can get me what I truly need is Hashem. Bitach al Hashem b'chol libecha. Tefillah is supposed to remind me that Hashem is the one who's in charge of my life. Hashem is the one who's in charge of my livelihood. Hashem is the one who's in charge of my spiritual success. Hashem is the one who's in charge of everything. All of my family, all of everything that goes on in the world. Every single every single missile that hits, Hashem is in charge of it, whether we like the results or we don't. And then, the Marsha's says, V'al binascha al tisha'en. Don't trust your intellect. He brings a possuk, which is a few psukim later, Rufus tehe tehe l'sharecha. Which means that there's going to be a cure for your inwards. For actually means your stomach. Right? A person's stomach is the place that he eats. Person can have a stomach ache. If he eats the wrong foods, he can end up with a stomach ache. There is something that cures my stomach ache. There's something that cures me. Cures my problems. What is it? Chuli m'atira. It's a reference to the Torah, learning of Torah. So, it seems to me that what the Marsha's saying is, as we said before, that when I learn Torah, so, it straightens my thinking. V'al binascha al to shine. Don't trust on your own intellect, right? There's a natural way of thinking. >> [sighs] >> What we call das mal about him. Those who are not learning, those who have not studied, those have not tried to understand what is the will of Hashem. So, they have a certain way of thinking and that way of thinking is the opposite of Hashem's will, often. Often. A person needs to strip away the egoic type of thinking. A person needs to strip it away, get rid of it, and then underneath it, the more I align myself with das Torah, the more I align myself with the will of Hashem. What is Hashem's will for me in this moment? It's only possible to know through the Torah, through my learning, through studying together what we're studying together. It's the only way to know. It's that which cures me of my ills. Cures me. Right? The stomach, if we think about it, the stomach is the place on the human body, all of the things that I take into my body, all the food that I eat, gets processed through my stomach. That's what gives me my It keeps me alive. It sustains me. Whatever I'm eating is being is sustaining me through my stomach. But, what is that which really sustains me? It's the Torah. It's the das Elokim. The knowledge of Hashem's will. We'll read what The thing here in Marol from the Marol in Nesivos Shalom. L'ma'an bitach Hashem, l'ma'an bitacham ba'Shem. Points out again what we mentioned last week. We're going to speak about it again. It says, trust to Hashem. It doesn't say trust in Hashem. Ki midaber b'shaas ma'aseh. Cuz it's speaking about at the time of one's actions. It's not giving us a general principle, a general um outlook on life, but it's saying at the time when a person is taking action I'm doing something. Hashem, be with me. I'm inviting Hashem to please help me. My thoughts should be Hashem is with me. Hashem is guiding me. Hashem, please be with me. It's a type of prayer. It's a prayer in my thoughts. Just like we said before, the tfila is something that reminds me that it's Hashem who's doing it for me. I need to remind myself when I'm doing anything that it's Hashem who's doing it for me. You know, bitachon by nemar doesn't say bitach b'Hashem, trust in Hashem. It says trust to Hashem. Turn your thoughts back to Hashem, like we said last time. Doesn't say trust in Hashem cuz that That would indicate that a person should place his trust in Hashem. But it's not speaking about it. It's just a general thing. A general outlook that a person should have. But the trusting in Hashem as I am taking action, that's a different kind of trusting in Hashem. I can need to keep remind myself I'm saying a shiur, I'm I'm sharing with you words of Torah. Hashem is the one who's helping me. Hashem is speaking through me. Hashem is guiding my thoughts. And Hashem as I am working, as I am putting in efforts, Hashem, please help me. Help me succeed in what the efforts that I'm doing. When I trust in Hashem and not in my own wisdom the result is that Hashem fulfills my wishes. Hashem fulfills answers my requests. That is the direct result of me turning constantly as I'm doing things to Hashem and and recognizing that it's him who's doing it. Thank you so much for listening. We'll see you again next time.