Rabbi Yechiel Yitzchok Perr - Bitachon - Introduction to Darchei Habitachon

i don't think we're going to do much learning in my dragon's autumn right now because when we make a stickler belmont i don't need this formula first of all i want to tell you that i i always i want to start these sessions earlier and have to pay something but my wife severely hurt herself on pesach she fractured her spine she's in intense pain and she can't be left alone and i don't have meanwhile the wherewithal to cover for her so i haven't been here doing taking care of it 24 7. [Music] and our resistance should go well we'll be fine we'll continue so but this vitamin will be intermittent at least in the beginning maybe throughout till the end of this month that's number one what do i want to tell you why i i hesitate yet i think we should learn but we were back in the lakeland three of us or four of us that i remember i remember myself and somebody else reminded three of my before you remember if you would make a separate seder with us besides the sheer retirement and the money and everything we learn all the time we make it safe for satan with us to some other safer so he agreed and we meet thursday night i think it was after 11 o'clock went around that he went to bed when he wasn't gonna have to take one then i was admired and my side remember 10 30 maybe going back eight for century and it was that time tonight and he um what do you want to learn i said we said to him you know whatever she must learn with us so he chose to learn sharon battaglia [Music] come back to me soon thank you very much now i um and most of it was very few lines were covered most of it was he told stories about godless and botoxin from people that lived before [Music] and uh which teaches us that bhutan talking as we learn from like many things i've learned from stories from the experiences of other people i um i was in pace i was basically i was in the first days i was by one of my children and there was a bris from somebody who dabbed in the same next to me granted in the same place right down in the junta they asked the grace and i don't know the person very well but it was father-in-law you know was only two blocks away and as i'm going uh a certain person with two people walking opposite me one of them was doctor's name again and i remember he's the father-in-law of david kalish and he has a young man with him a young man is older than you twice your age bradley and um he said ah he was wearing my pair and apparently you had to speak with this guy and i didn't end up going to the bris i ended up sitting on my son's porch and talking to the guy so this young man who was label of course this young man has a terrible sorrow he has a family his oldest child is a son of 12 or so 12 or 13 maybe i remember sixth grade impossible child he has all kinds of problems adhd and this and that and that all kinds of things he can't sit in the classroom he can't do this he can't do it he's bright you understand but he's the house is absolutely harv shabbos stables horrif he beats the other children his younger sisters i can't control him he actually came to speak to his doctor about doctors put did me a favor gave it to me and i asked in the first question which is should be always the first question does it go to a shrink do you take the child to a prime to professional so it's like surprise that he took this child to several very qualified professionals and one said to do this wants to do that different things and he's really beside himself with sir i can't tell you can't imagine having until you and you if you're a parent you have this kind of a problem the pain is un unimaginable otherwise so i told him two pieces of advice i'd listen to him first you have to listen to a person you have to hear him out not because he's gonna hear something new in the first second the first 30 seconds that you hear me know right away what the problem is and you understand it but the person has to get off his chest so the first thing he can do for him is to listen to him a lot of is repetitious and most of there's no finishing well especially a person like myself was that experience with with youngsters and as soon as you tell me as this is problems of his problem it's telling me more than that i understand there has to be i told them two pieces of advice i think they're worth hearing first piece of advice was that don't run to any to some to different therapists take one of the therapists who has a good reputation who you heard is good with feeling when you met them that they're good and then stick with that therapist from beginning to end don't go to another therapist because and that's what he's been doing because therapy doesn't work right away and a solution especially in a case like this is not happening right away and each one has their own approach and probably each one works if you stick to it but if you run from one to the other it's not going to work so pick out one who's recognized except in the community they will talk about the different therapists they will take each one as a reputation pick out one you probably you want to open that one already stick with their advice from beginning to end even it doesn't look like it's working so that was one of the victim that would be helpful and then i told him another piece of advice i said you and your wife have to work on bedoking you have to learn a little bit that's 15 minutes a week but you should not make a slider together because you'll never keep it he said how did you know i tried many times next day with one year it's because i tried many times myself saturday life never works because each side forgives the other one for not keeping your sin it's only with a stranger it's a shame not to keep up the seder so you do it so you have to find a friend to learn with you 15 minutes a week i'm going to say the cavua and your wife has to find around the verse 215 minutes the next question is what to learn so i said i don't think you should learn clevis elements so why i said first you should learn something in english so if i was translated of course so you should learn something in english you should not learn fabulous love officer so why starts off talking about the advantages of the token over alchemy alchemy was a foreigner of chemistry and it was baloney it was the an effort to turn lead into gold which people claimed they could do and all the kings wanted to go and they supported these guys who were busy it doesn't happen overnight you know you have to support me for at least 35 years with my family my children my grandchildren but we're getting there we're making progress that's what alchemy is so resolved indeed a thousand years ago and that was the in science of the times he said it was checking the whole thing we deserve credit he deserves we should stand up for him that he recognized in the times that he lived that helped me with shecker and he says his check nevertheless since people believed in alchemy she starts off as that shire of natashan discussing the advantages of the talking over alchemy and though he says it's checker but nevertheless if he talks about such things that in our eyes is a tus which it is so it feels very difficult to relate to the let's call it that because of this because of this beginning it's a shame that it is that way but it is that way you need to say for you want the same to talk your language when he's talking about alchemy he doesn't talk your language just same reason i said she learned something in english because hebrew how much how well-versed we are in hebrew but hebrew is still a foreign language and it's far into our hearts in which we understand it how much time we spent understanding hebrew and understanding the nuances of the language the beauty of the language and what it's saying and the union the e-union that are there the double meanings that only english that only has the psychosis is speaking in a foreign language to us you have to learn your own language as i said that many go into his forum shot and look around for something i'll be talking in english a lot of good things around and learn it the reason i told him this was because not because it's going to solve the problem of his childhood because it might mitigate the problem of himself he didn't solve it but it will mitigate the problem himself because there's still problems one problem is a child which is very hard to go with and that you need a professional and you have to stick with the same professional tool every year two for three years even whatever it is to find a solution until finally things get better and they say a solution the other problem is yourself how do you put up with this you know what it means to lose your temper and what happens to your own self-respect when you lose your temper and what happens to your wife what happens to your family however is destroyed by this whole family is destroyed what about the other children well it's there's only one there's only one thing going on in the family and that's this kid you know the kids there's not a husband on the family there's just this kid morning moon and night that's all the parents have taken absorbed by not because they love him more because that's their problem and the person is torn up that's his life his wife is torn up that's her life and they it's not happy between them there's not now between the other child so what can be done about that problem and that problem of course therapy would help also we should begin with find out that there's a god in this world and he runs the world and he takes care of people and you can leave it to him to do a little bit also at least [Music] it makes you breathe easier and as you if you get it into you you'll start to see wonderful things in your life so today is 22 days in either so this is like 22 days ago this story time to me it's pretty fresh pretty much straight out of the oven 21 days ago so it's something that hasn't a number of times and i need to look at myself everybody needs a little refresher refresh of course at school all the professionals today that have licenses from the state have to take continuing education credits a doctor a social worker you all have to take courses every year take a certain amount of credits continue the education after they got their degree and their license and the reason is because you have to be fresh in your subject and it's just natural the person forgets as much as jeremy says it's natural that things cool off and then we weaken i've told you story a number of times byron told us stories about previous door let me tell you a story about iron door so a woman called me up from out west there aren't there many people in that city and if i tell you where this is maybe we'll find out who the person is so i decided not to tell you where it is he was teaching for a number of years and he bought a business he's a very crucial person moved out to this town and took a responsibility for yeshiva there and other things raising money for them and became a leader in the community everybody looks up to him he's really special needs a partner so also don't forget so he bought a business with somebody a woman and it was a lot of money to buy a business she had to borrow three hot decided to put his little money he had into it himself he borrowed three hundred thousand dollars to buy the business we decided we put it himself and lo and behold as happens all the time it happened here in philadelphia but at another time into the issue of what a business and it turned out that people only sell businesses that they know are no good and is going into the ground sometimes they even have two sets of books believe it or not one set that shows profits and they gotta set the shows realities and they show you the second show's profits let me tell you several stories about that but it's not again so i don't know what happened with him but he bought a business and then there was nothing left out of business it was worthless and it was a lot of money his wife called me up i hadn't spoken to him that's why i pulled me off i'm out of town and she said right there my husband's walking around terribly depressed he owes a lot of money he's just crushed so um i said to her could you please speak to him so i said to her can i say that you called me and then you told me you called me and asked me to speak to him because otherwise he thinks i'm gonna say i called him out of the bloom suddenly out of town and i say yes you can say i called you and to speak to him about the thing and you know about it so i did so i hold him up and i heard it his eyes get clapped and his kiss gets knocked down there's only one thought in his mind over and over again 300 000 300 000 300 000 i'll get a job but i'll never pay that money back i get a job i need to money to live on let's say i get a hundred thousand dollars i have a family to support i'm going to pack being paid back three dollars a year what's going to happen how can i do this he's a very honest person he can't just walk out and beside that i don't legally you know it wasn't embarrassing personally not as a corporation but everybody has corporations also for three hundred thousand dollars one thing is he's he's dead i called him up and he listened to him again comes into his wife like listen to the other guy and i'm like look i can't listen to everybody with a sir i said to my ear right here he said he's very busy now he says i have nothing to do the business is dead it's gone dude i want to ask you something maybe you can do it say what he said maybe translate the chapter on the token you write well and i somebody told me that he'll print it if he gets out in a good job done we'll print it on condition that i agree it is a good job say he'll pray he'll publish it he said maybe you'll do that you're not busy now so guys then i'll tell you the truth rebbe i know you used to teach beethoven in yeshiva but you know i never came to the bottom i said i know i remember that i said that doesn't matter we need a translation anyway and you should be the translator he said you know what i'll look it over with my wife maybe we'll sit down and do a job together [Music] this was about two years ago in the middle of the winter i was in camponotus as you know been there unfortunately for how many years hiding out in my hideout you don't know about but it's a good place and he shows up way out west all the way up to campbell's he came up special to bring me the translation big smile on this face how are you doing great what's happening with your problem the problem will be good well i'll tell you what happened with the problem i didn't really know i didn't want to i didn't want it to re-awaken the wound or ask him too much i can tell you what i think happened with the brother when a person has a problem he's festering on his mind and we're all like this see the person tied up in a knot he can't see a way out of the problem he was right in front of him he's so thought out did you hear that i want you to know that for life a person has a problem see a person gets tied up but in a nut and there's no way out of that problem he's going to die from the problem because there's no door out of the problem if the problem is loosened and somehow it becomes easier then he says oh i could do this and this and this i could list and then do that and then the third thing oh that's what happens which is what happened to him what exactly happened to him so he told me the problem is no longer a problem i said you pay off the money no i'm not paid off where do you get it from from translating sean results i want him to learn sharpies i don't even know the learners you don't have to have a tough how's your wife the one who called he said she's on another planet completely said what do you mean she's on another planet he said i have to talk but she was in a different one of us i'm going to share i said tony what's what are you talking about he said i'll tell you two examples we had my brother-in-law by us with all these kids before pesach the kids make a homemade house and they'll have to go home for base off moving us to gordon actually that's what visitors do know that and we faced the reality but our cleaning lady said to my wife i'm sorry mrs my mommy is sick in guatemala wherever i have to go home take care of her and she quit every face off my wife was about to have a collapse very upset and she said to me okay i'm going upstairs and i said to her what are you gonna do upstairs i wanna talk to hashem she was upstairs and she came down he said what'd you say to me said hashem gotta help me i can't do this i trust you there's no way i can do this i have to have you hunted in the house that's it it's your problem she's talking to me said there's a knock on the door we opened the door there's a little lady standing there she says maybe you need some help for clean house for how do they i was just talking he says that a different planet and let me tell you how we got the house so how did you get to the house he said well we were in an apartment that was so small we couldn't live there the kids would squeeze them i don't remember he told me a number in the bedroom he couldn't live there so when i said i have the taco we're gonna have a house i said what are you talking about joshua is gonna give us a house we're talking a shabbos night she walked out of the house and took a walk walked our apartment to walk she came back 15-20 minutes later with a piece of paper she wanted a telephone number and she's here call this number she passed the house and said house for sale with a number on it i called the number the guy said what i just hung up the sign right after shop is a hook up to sign that's the house we're in he said is that a different plan it might be now this is from one person i have letters from people in israel who read stories that happened with them unbelievable there's a guy in lakewood what that's his name it was in shiva and there also unfortunately calls himself mookie his last name is diamond monkey diamond his real name is mordechai i never called him it should be called he has stories about him his own life that are incomprehensible incomprehensible incomprehensible so i'm not telling stories from the old generations which were true too today's stories about people that uh one of whom you know mookie will modify better and uh somebody who's never don't want to tell you because i will tell you about the three hundred thousand dollars in somebody else's private business i have no right to tell you the stories about other people other people's finances but there are many other stories of this sword i think that uh as i said intermittently we'll be learning when i have the the kayak and the ability to learn with you and actually my granddaughters came now to stay with my wife i came uh and now i'm free till about four o'clock so i came to egypt so they came to them and they've mentioned foreign some of you asked me for it and second of all i would like to refresh myself i've gone through many things in my life difficulties you shall also [Music] i'm sorry to tell you that i'm sorry to tell you that i wish i could tell you life isn't all the cherries but there are pits in the cherries too i had no wishing on you i just knew it that was a rule for greatness because i've seen it i'm going to a lot of things in life [Music] it's marvelous unbelievable i'm still alive i'm alive what else you have to me beside alive and i've opened many times this safer in times of great need in times when i was tied up in a nut i couldn't see a door i couldn't believe there is a door this is an old regular sword i always tell over that look how worn out it is it was a new one when i got it but i tell that when i used to touch the cover i felt on the pebbly surface under my fingers as soon as i touched the cup i used to feel ah it's on the way before i even opened it up ah it's on the way now that there were many sheets in guitar and not many sheets different sheets i should say and really the same sheet but it's all about four different people and even myself and even for the same person a different myself let me repeat that they all believe they understand the same thing the bottom line is the same but there are all the different sheets there's a writing abit often for different people one is writing for the daily one is writing for baba batu well they're writing about the same person in a different matchup sometimes a person has strength impatience and it's unwavering but often sometimes the person is weak in their beta the greatest of us is we can never talk and they feel weak but one thing i have to tell you that there's two extremes in the top that everybody agrees to the lowest level is yes you have to know their british and runs the world every jews will leave to know that there is a british room and he runs the world anyone knows something i think that every jew knows that it doesn't mean they don't they know what every second i think every jew every irreligious jew knows that every two married to a shakespeare every june that's an atheist every atheist knows that deep inside as we all know that we as jews are a miracle they can only be explained by the fact that the creator wants us to be here everybody knows that i don't say they tell it to other people who say they even acknowledge it to themselves but they know that and every four minutes believed in knowledge there's a british level and certainly i read the world i took it out of egypt that's what it says in that mitzvah and that ever chosen clearly there's no excuses for that you got to say it with your mouths even if it doesn't climb your heart which has to say with your mouth if you say it often enough it look on your heart you penetrate deeply into you that's the lowest level of the time the highest level of the token is that if you have the token body shallow will make it happen did you hear that one if you have the doctrine it will make it happen that's a heinrich reagan but if you have the talking he will make it happen and in between there are various different fluctuations and levels for instance the common thing is godzilla tiger that doesn't mean he's going to make it happen it means i know that somehow it's good that even the evil things are good call my dog whatever she was good although the good is hidden but to know that and believe that but i'm not being able to change things but i have to but i know that it's good somewhere in my mind i know it's good in the back of my mind and brushing's helping with my toddlers i can move that thought from the back of my mind to the front of my mind that it's good it turns out to be good it's good in the next world but it always is good that is good that will turn out to be good and sometimes it's good in the next world but it always is good that is good it will turn out to be good and sometimes it'll turn out to be good in the next world but always is good it always is good now ramakiva learned by nokimiz and they called him ish gansu but he didn't say he comes and he said guns all the table i said why do you call them nothing comes to the table well maybe it's too long the name you know you always have so many names guys deutsche [Music] this kiddish was to understand from past experiences that damsula told him not just to say not just to say that everything he does is good but in my own life i've seen certain things that i thought were awful or whatever and gam zulu will be good also just like the other thing was because that's why and that was his teaching and that's why it's called without even the word because the inca finish was the damn zoo we say it ourselves many times you say for instance imagine the first brethren alone and therefore i'll examine this gum zoo it turned out good i've had what to eat all the time i judge from the past what the future will be i don't have a prognosis what i have where is i want to eat because i'm always happy to eat i'm missing that one called blossom and there isn't a person in the world even at your young age who can't think of some experience that they were sure was a tragedy it turned out it was a good thing or wasn't the tragedy at least for instance last time you sent her a ship's office and he gave you his stealing all right look when she practices i said you did what and you got out alive so you could say damsel died she goes on the table i think this one's scary it is it's my job so i think that's a very good thing to start with on your own he's trying to think of some things that you thought would just turn but it turned out that it was not terrible and maybe you have some things that turned out to be very good it was very careful it's not good it was definitely good maybe i haven't had enough long enough life experience at this point to have such cases and tafky was good and it was good because the version was really what's good for you that's the sharjah batofa the author of the verdict i had the most extreme teachings in muslim for all the muslim people i don't know if you i shouldn't say that but it was contemporaries i should say as with other places and this this scottish one but he had it's very successful by the way success was successful in teaching it he had the most extreme cheetahs in and other places had all every sheep was made except for near in the was founded by the muslim movement all of them every single issue you've ever heard of was founded by the muslim movement but in most cases in most cases the muslim was uh light l-i-t-e you know it says bud light you see those trucks blood light or drinking blood but besides blood light is also wiser if you get wiser when you drink it but his bud wiser and his was bud wiser it was the real stuff that goes down that delicious bitter taste but wiser so the muslim teaches is very strong uncompromising but i think that if you hear things that are strong you will you'll come out light if you hear things that are light make them up with nothing and you make them unscrew and um what if i dive into somebody who came out strong he's not the only one many many others i'm ready to say from the you know you're not strong and the guy out of town came out strong so the letter has circumstances permit nasa as ancient hope we'll get back we'll start all over [Music] it's the gate because you have to know what you're learning before you're learning so this was over there we started i know it's you know the mainstream of you this guy is in hebrew if you're speaking to americans yes is right thank you