Unite to Heal 36 hours Live Stream Event

[Music] thank you foreign [Music] foreign [Music] [Applause] [Music] thank you [Music] thank you [Music] foreign [Music] foreign [Music] foreign [Music] foreign [Music] [Applause] [Music] thank you [Music] thank you [Music] foreign [Music] my name is Nahum Siegel and it is with great pleasure that I welcome you to unite to heal 2022 on behalf of amudim and charity bids welcome to an incredible 36 hour presentation we're kicking things off with this live hour right now from Brooklyn New York at flowmotion Studios and we're going to conclude our program tomorrow evening from 6 to 9 pm which will end a 36-hour live stream presentation a presentation that's going to remind everybody to support amudim and keep them going with their annual campaign go to uniteaheel.com right now and be as generous as possible in addition the 36 hours features some incredible conversations some wonderful amazing presentations that have everything from Comedy to education to mental health to game show shows and so many other wonderful segments it's all happening right here at unite to heal 2022 unite2heal.com ask your friends and relatives around the world to tune in and to enjoy all of this great programming you know I'll move them in charity bids has a track record for the last couple of years they've done this amazing presentation with all fresh brand new material and the wonderful focus on so many different issues both light and serious issues in the Jewish community and everybody around the world is going to be treated to that again this year we're kicking off this hour we're going to be speaking to everybody who of course is the co-founder and director of amudim we are going to be speaking with some special guests we're going to remind everybody why it's so important to support this great cause and how a mood them has had such an impact internationally in our community and then we're going to get into some of the amazing segments with the holy of squares and discussions on technology and philanthropy and EDU education of course mental health and comedy and so many other things with some wonderful special guests names that you're very familiar with people have made a great impact in their area of of entertainment education inspiration throughout the Jewish World so all of this is available to you at unite2heal.com in fact in addition to donating and supporting amudim at that website I strongly recommend you scroll down and go to the list of incredible features that will be presented all through the day and night a lot of great segments are going to be introduced at a specific time and you'll see just how amazing this lineup is and just how incredible this entire production again is on behalf of amudim so again be as generous as possible and encourage everybody to do the same we want to see how move them get to their goal we want to see I moved them flourish for yet another year with the very incredible work that they do on a daily basis with all all the cases and all the incredible help and assistance that they're giving to individuals and families throughout the entire world I want to take this opportunity to thank our friends at flow motion the everything of course in this 36 hours is going through their Studio here in Brooklyn New York and working with their staff is always a treat always a delight and a special thank you to them our friends at charity Biz have been working very hard to make sure that some amazing personalities and great people who are experts in their field are going to be joining us during these 36 hours both live and some incredibly produced segments that you'll find fascinating so give it a shot check out the lineup see the schedule unite2heal.com and you'll see what we have to offer and what to expect over the next 36 hours at the very top of the page is the most important function however of this 36-hour campaign and this live presentation and that's the ability to donate to support the great work of amudim so so many people are already very familiar with the serious work that they undertake on a daily basis and how hard their staff works and the results that they get and how so many kids and so many young adults and so many adults in our community plus their families have been affected in such a positive way so that they can continue with their life and in many cases that their lives can be saved and they can move on to build peaceful and wonderful lives for themselves and for their family so please let's not forget the most important thing about unitesaheel.com and that is to support amudim make sure to get as much support as possible through your own network of friends and family post on your social media that people should be tuning in and giving and being as generous as possible and let's make this campaign amudum's most successful ever Rabbi speak luck is CEO and co-founder of amudim and he is here on this Sunday wanted to kick off this amazing presentation a pleasure to welcome you to unite to heal rabbit speak look thank you and as always thank you for your dedication and your true concern and compassion and again I just want to say a quick Mazel Tov to you and timister who you know without her we wouldn't even be able to be in you know doing this so Miriam is amazing so thank you to Miriam Malik and Mazel Tov and uh listen let's just keep having some Christian you know that's the main thing I'll mean to that and I pointed out to you the other day and it's a great place to start that with all the very serious situations that you deal with and we're talking about in many cases situations that end with the worst results possible I think what keeps you going is all the positive results the incredible things that your staff does to make sure that individuals and their families can flourish after all the problems they've been having absolutely I mean the staff are are amazing I mean I say this all the time and I don't say it enough every single member of the Amazon family they're really like it's it's just pieces of the puzzle that we can't do without and excuse me very often in our line of work we don't always get to see the the beauty at the end people very often when they're doing better they want to forget that we are there because it brings back dark memories which we understand but when we do get those beautiful emails from people saying thank you I'm getting engaged or I'm having a child or I graduated college or I got my degree you know it gives this tremendous uplifting and I've said this before but we have what we call the the pillar of strength that we have in the office and it's basically where we post all the nice you know messages that we get from the people that we've helped and we obviously take off the names of course but it's a real source of inspiration and that's really what keeps us going is looking at the wins you in fact pointed out to me that there has been I mean there are many Gatherings where you invite people that have been involved both professionally and of course as clients and there are times when people people who work clients will get up and tell the board members and those gathered exactly what their experience was like and it's it's got to bring tears to the eye it's got to be a chilling experience but again it's part of what makes all this worth it right so what's really interesting is whenever they ask me you know can you um find someone that we've helped that's willing to speak or do an interview it's always very difficult and we don't want to pressure anybody and we don't want to force anybody so it is what it is but the few times that that's happened in a public setting was unscripted like we were we were doing a staff appreciation weekend of inspiration for the staff for their families and you know we we were at a hotel and there were other families there not part of our event but they were there and as we were kicking off the Saturday night malava Malco someone comes up in front of a few of the board members and says to me do you mind if I say a few words about amudum and I always get nervous you know but again it's not a live event type it is what it is and and she gets up and just gives this heartwarming speech and and everybody there was like shocked because we couldn't have I mean and of course there were those jokes of saying oh you got her to come to Shabbos you know which is always cute but no and it's and it's things like that it's those small things I was at a wedding last week some guy comes over to me and shows me a picture he goes you need to look at these pictures of my son I never heard of him I never heard his name I never heard of his son's name but again showing me how he's doing great he's in college now these are just things that just keep us going all right we have a packed hour so we only have a couple of minutes to go uh you and I let's remind everybody why it's so important to support the cause I mean we are we you can go through the entire list of different cases that you take care of for our community just tell people why it's so important to keep on moving going because in order for us to be able to have these great happy stories you know we need to go through the component of really making it happen and our staff which are all trained professionals therapists they need to get paid we have therapy subsidy funds that when we have money we can subsidize therapy we have to do awareness you know bringing about awareness isn't just about a modem but it's about people getting help regardless of how they find the help but you know that costs money and the operation is a very expensive operation and we need all the help we can get you do amazing work your staff's incredible and there are so many different categories of problems out there in our community that are being addressed by ahmud and the list is endless and we'll get to some of them of course during these this incredible program Rabbi spieglock I thank you continued success I hope these 36 hours are in fact a great success I hope you get to your goal and then I moved him gets to its goal and if you're able to continue on for the next many many months and years helping people in our community I mean thank you very much I appreciate that it's unite to heal 2022 everybody it's an incredible kickoff of an amazing program that's going on for uh 36 hours check it out go to the website unite2heal.com see the amazing lineup of fantastic features and wonderful wonderfully produced pieces that are going to be a part of this entire live stream we are now going to go to this video presentation and come back with plenty more at unite to heal 2022. [Music] my name is Yehuda Greenberg I grew up in a very from Orthodox household I went to goodieshiva's good schools you know I had good grades you know I was going to be the next god of the next Ralph and then over the years things you know started to to fall apart I didn't feel in place I felt out of place whether it be in Social settings in family settings School settings I just wanted to be okay with myself I wanted to be okay with my family who at that point our relationship was strained obviously they wanted a path for me that I didn't want for myself or didn't know what I wanted for myself but I knew that I wasn't comfortable with what I was doing so I started smoking weed and you know I was accepted into a new social setting amongst peers that smoked weed and we had fun and over time that then like the other you know drugs substances over time I had developed a habit of taking prescription medications that were unprescribed and included opiates benzodiazepines and along with that came a lot of alcohol one thing led to the next and the drug usage got worse over time until I developed an addiction both physical and mentally but the most important thing about it was that it it made me feel okay and I would forget the day come night time and come to morning time I had something to look forward to emotionally I think it was the best word to describe it was numbness there was no emotions it was just me living in this alternate universe that uh there wasn't emotions it was so empty it was just there was nothing there I still remember vividly it was a Friday night it was at a friend's house eating a Shabbos dinner and a gentleman that was part of my father's he sat me down he said maybe you should think about getting some help and for the first time I felt it was somebody wanted to help me somebody understood what I was going through it was eye-opening to me and I said sure come Sunday he called me and said I spoke to an organization on your behalf it happened to be a mudim and he said you know we record a treatment center that you could go get help and he said this is when your flight is do you want somebody to fly with you I was in shock I was nervous fearful anxious I said no I'm okay I was a big boy I said I'll fly by myself it was in California I went to Chabad Treatment Center I went not knowing what to expect and it was the best experience I ever had it was a place where I belonged there was no judgment that for me was the most important thing it was feeling that I was a part of something that I never felt before and throughout all this the healing emotionally began and a lot of it started with the community but a lot of it was being okay and comfortable with who I was and who I wanted to be when I got out out of treatment I then started a case management work at a hospital detox and that's really where things started coming together for me my job was to talk to people and get them to treatment that was my job having those conversations and just opening their eyes to like what life can be and also leaning on my past experiences it just made it a lot easier seeing somebody go from point A in their lives even to point B it doesn't have to be a to z but gay I'm into treatment is like the most drastic thing I can do to help somebody just like somebody did it for me it's something I love doing and I built my self-confidence and people started to lean on me for and whether it was a ride to work or whatever it was people leaned on me for for something and and now I got married which is my biggest dream and God willing starting a family and my parents I am forever grateful I think they're very proud of what I've done I don't think I would have been on this path or Journey had an organization like a movie non-existent the second day got that call it was no obstacle there was no how much is it you know when is it let's get it now I think that was one of the biggest things that modem did for me was giving me that ability to say you know what I'm ready I want to get help and the rest was taken care of I'm forever grateful for I'm with them for what they provided me and the the impact that they made on my life will stand with me forever wherever I go and the fact that they make on other people's lives and I see it on a daily basis is instrumental in helping people get better and helping our communities really get better foreign [Music] and I remind everybody please go to unite2heal.com give as generously as possible to keep on move them going this is our number one of a 36 hour incredible live stream with amazing entertainment information discussions presentations it's chock full of so many amazing things check out the schedule unite2heal.com anybody familiar with the Jewish music world is certainly familiar with our next guest somebody I know for quite a while he became even more well-known in many other facets of Jewish life when we unfortunately lost his daughter johavid garari two years ago avrami gorari is here he is somebody who has dealt with and is now an expert in mental health conditions in the Jewish Community it is a pleasure to welcome you to unite2heal.com thank you thank you for having me I'm not sure but I'm not sure an expert but I'm glad to be here I'll tell you listening to your presentations on the topic it's hard for us to believe that you're not an expert at this point I would hope that the international outpouring after your daughter left us has helped your family deal with moving on or continuing after her passing um I can talk about myself I can't talk about my family for myself it definitely helped it sparked a discussion it sparked dialogue and it helped me cope and to process and meddle hundreds and hundreds and hundreds of people from across the world that news and it's been helpful and comforting for us what could you tell us that you've learned over the last two years in general about mental health we're focused on the great work that's being done in this area by this organization what can you tell us about our community and how it does or does not deal with serious mental health issues how much time do we have um it's interesting I was thinking about it as you told me on Friday that Mazel Tov and the both of you are grandson I believe granddaughter that I think we're living in amazing times and your daughter your granddaughter he's been born into a world that's an amazing amazing place right now because we know so much more today than we knew 20 years ago and we have um access to wonderful organizations like a modem which we didn't have access to you know so many years ago but not but more than that you know uh ahmudim and other organizations like it will take a family in crisis and somebody in Christ can help them the questions has to be asked though what can be done to prevent these kinds of crises to have happening in the first place so that organizations like him with him like others don't have to exist you know like you know you'll always see it like say a doctor you know why should I be interrupt and the the idea has to be centered around a discussion about Healthy Living which starts from a very very young age in healthy parenting so uh that's what I've learned from the last um from the last couple of years that the discussions are happening we must continue to talk we cannot forget uh those that are suffering today obviously but at the same time we need to um talk about how we are rearing children you know I have a friend who explained to me after two weeks later after my daughter passed away he explained to me you know it's not useful to to play the blame game and say because of this teacher this therapist uh myself my daughter's friends you know this is what happened but rather to kind of you know take stock as a community and figure out what can we do as a community as a society that these kinds of things don't happen today and unfortunately statistically the numbers are so high when it comes to suicide and mental health Acuity that that indeed that needs to be the discussion yes we need to help those that are in crisis today but what can we do for the future what can we do for your granddaughter which is point two days ago that 10 15 20 years down the road that it's a better place it's a better world to live in and uh that's one of my takeaways is our community beginning to realize or maybe you'd say it's way past the beginning that mental ailments are just as serious or need to be addressed just wait the way physical ailments are people understand when someone God forbid has a disease a physical disease they understand the importance of going to a doctor being on top of things following up etc etc are we getting to the point where when it comes to our mental health we're learning that that process is necessary as well so I think that on paper we believe it mean to say that everyone will tell you every school will tell you yeah we realize it's a problem but we're not quite there yet in terms of okay we're going to give the same level of attention that physical health gets and that's a process and it's happening and a lot of work has been done and I want to commence the communities and schools that are working towards that end but uh we're not quite there yet and um what's happening you know it's a process and uh again the discussion is important and the discussion continues and uh I'm I feel fortunate and unfortunate I guess but fortunately we're part of that discussion and try to uh inject some kind of such a Major Impact unite2heal.com everybody unitetheal.com please continue to support the great work of a mudim of Remy G I would have to have Remy gurari probably apologize that's okay um used your musical moniker for a moment that's right uh I'd have to imagine the last two years right you have helped certain families immeasurably I can't I'm not going to start saying that your experience has gone ahead and saved others lives but there has to be that element where what you've gone through has been such an incredible eye-opener for certain parents and for young adults going through similar situations right so yes and no it's a very interesting question that you're asking yes or no because on the one hand people are calling me up all the time and on the other hand it highlights an issue it highlights a problem because why are people calling me if someone had a I'm a Layman I'm not a trained mental health professional um if someone's in a mental health crisis why do they pick up the phone and call up of Remy guerrari they should be calling up a professional and I've always advocated for this and I hope this is going to be in the future where we have mental health we have a solid for mental health just like you know I saw that members I've spoken to are trained you know how to deal with mental health cases on the you know on the spot but we need like dedicated teams that there's a if they say if there's a uh a situation where someone needs help uh there's that there's mental health triage where you go to the family with you go to the the the the parents you say Okay move slide just like you do with a cardiac patient move aside uh we got this we know we don't know what you're doing like 70 to 12 hours or hours then we're going to hand it off to somebody else and uh yeah I mean it's great that you know they call me I try to help him you know that I can be helpful and productive in some way but uh it highlights the floor that why they're calling me not their at the very least the primary care physician 911 you know why they're calling me for advice sure what's happening in the United States because now there are more hotlines and there there is more attention being paid to this whole issue I think in general in this country I hope I'm right about this there are there are hotlines I don't know how useful they are right um I don't know usually are yeah it's a mixed bag of results I think right and in our community we obviously want to take these this very seriously and utilize the best as you said respond to emergency like situations immediately exactly that's exactly right solar for mental health mental health there might be something to that that's my that's my dream I understand that uh I I I can't I can't avoid emphasizing the positive as painful as that might be for you to hear or even for others to say to you because you've gone through such a horrifying experience I don't need the detail for any parent out there what what you've gone through one can only imagine those of us who thank God have not been in that situation but at the same time you're you have been at the epicenter of what I consider to be a revolution people paying more attention to this issue people wanting to make sure that if they they feel that you know their own child is going through what your daughter may have been going through Etc that they are you know stepping up and not avoiding it and not trying to deal with an unreasonable or or unrealistic ways they want to try to deal with it in a real realistic manner I think I think that is true and they are talking about it and uh they should be talking about it some more unfortunately there are some families and some parents that do not want to talk talk about it and I know it's I have to spoke to someone last week who so I think I know more about his daughter's case than his wife knows so but people are talking about it and uh you know go Inspire this more discussion than the education we have half a minute your heaven was based on every picture and video I've seen one of the most fun-loving life-loving people that you probably knew so that's that's the thing I'm trying to follow a lead and with Ellie Nash's direction that everything is positive positive positive I'm not I'm not complaining I'm not blaming she was a kind-hearted person she was a beautiful person she never she was an angry at religion it was angry at her neighbors at her family and her friends anyone shows us a beautiful kind loving fun person who had a disease had battled the disease for 10 years and uh succumbed to it just like any just a cancer would thank you for helping us shed light on this issue thank you thank you for asking me I appreciate that it's much appreciated Remy garari everybody and we remember his daughter yochevel fondly during this segment of course uh unite2heal.com unitedheal.com it is annual campaign we want to make it as successful as possible please donate be as generous as you can and encourage others to do the same we're going to wrap up tomorrow night hopefully achieving our goal let's make sure amudim has the ability to continue to help people in difficult situations like the ones we've been discussing already this morning unite2heal.com we're going to go to a video now which is going to describe the very interesting behind the scenes of what happens when ahmudim is presented with a brand new case please watch the video and a modem case manager is a very specific job case manager is not exactly the right title for the job therapist is not the right title for the job over the years we've tried to come up with like different titles comprehensive case manager clinical case manager but it's very unique because we're not just providing a referral initially we were providing case management just by having people that were being trained as case managers and then we realized that if we had clinicians doing the case management component that would actually make it much more effective and more efficient so we then started hiring clinicians to do that same work it's not about just doing referrals you know giving a number five seconds on the phone it was an understanding that what we're dealing with here is a mental health crisis we're dealing with addictions we're dealing with victims of abuse almost all the cases are due to some sort of trauma be it sexual trauma be it childhood trauma physical abuse issues that really need more than just a referral often we get calls from not even the clients themselves we get calls from their siblings parents Rob vanim all many teachers principals who are just looking for help we will get a lot of cases calling for what we call Psycho education they want to understand their loved one or theirs difficulties and they don't even know how to help them so they're starting just with tell me more about their mental health diagnosis they're extremely vulnerable and you're the first place that they're going to and some people just want a referral and that's it some people need to go into a treatment center and they want us to be involved and to follow up and speak with their therapists there and then even when they get out of treatment if they go to uh inpatient Outpatient Center afterwards if they go to a sober living kind of home we'll continue following up if there's any issues we have Liaisons in all different treatment centers and we'll try to solve the problem or make sure everything is perfect and not involve the client and let the client work on themselves in the treatment center and involve them and we'll just be behind the scenes taking care of everything making sure that everything is going well it's a million components the idea of creating a comfortable place where people could come in without the Judgment can get the the advice they need to referral but also to start unbeknownst them in the beginning to build that relationship to create a a place you know someone that they trust as case managers we don't know what our days will look like every day we're getting a new cases we start by calling a client I'm asking them what's going on tell me a little bit about yourself a little bit about your situation a big chunk of the day is following up with old clients checking in how is everything whether it was a referral psychiatrist psychologist Clinic have you gotten through how can I help you how can I help you to make that connection and how's it going my conversations with clients really ranges from highs to lows I can have some clients who I speak to will be like devorah I had an amazing day I had a great session another client who calls you up and will say before I relapse and that's okay we're we're here we're still here we're not going to drop you because you relapse that's part of life did something happen does something trigger you did something happen with your parents did something happen in the home that you're in the most important thing about case management is making sure that there's a good support structure for those in need the case manager is that that holding containing voice on the other end of the line throughout that that process they might have a therapist they might have a psychiatrist they might have a group or an AAA meeting but the case manager is that constant and really has taken people from Darkness to light from Despair and hopelessness to a beautiful life it's not a one-time two-time or even ten time phone call this is something that goes on for as long as needed it's going to come down to the clients to be successful they're the only ones who can who can achieve what we can do is provide the support provide the resources and more than anything provide the hope [Music] we're at unite to heal 2022 powered by ahmudim we're encouraging everybody to support this great cause and utilize the next 36 hours through social media and any other memes you can think of to tell your friends and relatives to do the same thing I moved them as such a vital backbone of our community internationally as we're going to learn in just a moment so please support our move them and do so as best as you can we have an incredible lineup all through the next 36 hours right after this hour 10 a.m Eastern Time holy squares is going to be presented there'll be a 2020 update with an incredible panel Sports and mental health with an incredible panel behind the bema highlights uh discussions on technology on philanthropy and said on education on Jewish music some great Jewish music stars are going to be on uh comedy and so much more so please make sure to utilize the next 36 hours to check out all the great live stream produced live stream programs produced by a moodin in enjoy them share them it's going to be amazing and I by the way at 6 p.m eastern time tonight at 6 PM eastern time tonight the segment that I have with rehearsaler Salita is going to air it is called a Layman and a London sit down to schmooze and we have an opportunity to do that and I hope you'll tune in at 6 p.m tonight for that conversation we have two special guests with us live from Israel via Zoom yossi goldbergstein is director of ahmud in Israel yasi welcome to the show and the Hama Monk Is With Us nakama is Yeshiva University's wertzweiler School of Social Work Director in Israel a pleasure to welcome you as well well here we are we're talking about supporting abuddin a lot of people don't even realize that ahmuda has a presence in Israel yesi galberstein what can you tell us about the work you're doing with at-risk youth and so many others Under the Umbrella of ahmudim Israel we're doing uniquely in the Israel office that isn't happening in the American office we're we're a branch of them worldwide the case management the same nature of the work the same uh the trauma the addiction the abuse um it's really it's it's the same it's the same product that we're providing um what's very exciting which why not is here uh we've been very blessed to be able to start a a new project over here um we just a few weeks ago uh I moved in Israel we've joined together with Yeshiva University Virtual School of Social Work and we've opened up a clinic to be able to provide subsidized therapy uh has been my my partner in this um so we figured we could tell you more about it 100 nathama this is very exciting this official relationship now between I move them and wurtzweiler of Yeshiva University uh tell us exactly what the school what your staff is going to be providing for those who are in need so um we came up with this idea um because our students needed um good placements to do their internship in social work and um and therefore we partnered with them we needing to create this Therapy Center where we provide therapy for any English speaker in need whether it's Gap year students whether it's olim whether it's people that are here for the year or for a few years to learn and then go back to America and we provide mental health therapy in different issues or subjects that people need when in a subsidized way so instead of it costing a very uh large fee it's it's very subsidized and that's something that we we work very very diligently to make sure that the therapy that we provide is uh responsible and professional professional as much as possible it can be cost prohibitive I mean you're describing it it could be cost prohibitive and I'm sure and I'm sure yes you would agree that the less expense of it is the easier it is to provide these services for the people in need uh yesi um I guess this really it doesn't need to be said uh but I think it's such an important thing to remember uh so many people think that there are cases and situations that are isolated in certain parts of the world it's only the American Jewish Community that's going through this it's only in Europe that the that the kids have this specific problem when it comes to the to the areas that I moved them addresses uh Israel as you just pointed out is not unique this is what's happening with kids around the world this is what's happening with people with these challenges and I guess that the the the fact that now ahmudim has extended itself to Israel is just to address the needs of those who are going through the same things right it's it really is the same needs it's the same issues research data statistics show that you know even abuse it's it's Global it doesn't make a difference what type of community what we're living in what culture uh by and large the you know the sort of Statistics uh sadly are really pretty flat pretty uh similar across the board um one one aspect that is I think unique about Israel's work in Israel um you know uh in contrast to to the American work is a common denominator of so many of the families and individuals they're working with they're here somewhat figuratively alone you know at their anglos and whether they're Gap year students away from their home and family whether they're Olean who left the cousins and the parents and the siblings behind um that that becomes a marked you know significant difference their experience not a cultural difference but a practical difference and that's a very important thing you're pointing out because that then you need more hand-holding in those situations when people either are alone or feel more alone nakama is it hard because obviously in this country we have a tremendous resource of English speakers is it hard to find professionals or people who want to go in this line of work who are English speakers in Israel well I think um I'm not sure if it's so hard to find I think that um the communities are are growing and and you do have professionals and I think that's part of what what's Weiler does as trained Professionals in English for the English-speaking Community however what I think is really harder is to navigate the system in Israel and if we provide a system then it's much easier for them to to access the therapy because in Israel mental health it can be subsidized by the kupatollium the nhs's right however however for for the English-speaking population to navigate the the system and to know who's professional who is professional that's something that a mudim is very good in providing the who are the good and professional and registered and certified people to do the the help to give the proper help and with him has an amazing intake process that they do and that they provide to because in Israel almost anybody who takes a crash course in anything can decide that their uh a pop star uh a professional in DBT because I took it at eight just as an example an eight-week course in DVT so now I'm like this professional um however uh we work very hard to make sure that everything is regulated and um and that and the the help that we provide is professional and I think amudim has this amazing reputation in doing uh really great work in that sense one of the reasons and that's what we want to provide in the therapy center as well one of the reasons those of you at home please or on the road wherever you are watching should be supporting the work of amuda which is completely International at this point not that this is time for my aliapush but the students in the United States know that this opportunity is available if they go into these Social Work fields and want to move to Israel they will now they certainly will I have to make sure to push it I can tell you that much uh yes see the is the um sometimes the pressure it seems on some of the younger people in Israel is more difficult for them to deal with whether it's Army issues or expectation issues the loneliness that you just described I mean that's obvious that that in and of itself is is a difficult hurdle to achieve so sometimes do you think that there's there's more intense intervention needed or a little bit of a different angle of intervention needed for those who are over there but it's it's it's a difficult question um I I can say I can answer yes and I can answer no I think that for young and adults and whether we're talking about adolescence whether we're talking about people in their 20s um I think that that age you know that that period of years is is going to be complicated wherever they're living um so you know yes globally um at the same time and this is something that we see uniquely with The Gap year students almost like Bittersweet almost uh certainly with with history you know with trauma cases and abuse cases um an advantage that the the young adults had when they're coming overseas maybe for a gap year for Yeshiva for Seminary they're away from the source of pain from the source of abuse and it might be the first time they're having the opportunity to actually deal with this and address this and it's it can be advantageous for them so the hummus sometimes when someone's far away from the source of the situation it's easier to get a bigger picture and deal with it more effectively huh a lot of people send their their a lot of parents will send their their their adolescence to Israel and a gap year program in an attempt to to also get a breather for themselves but also hopefully that that way it'll be it'll get taken care of they'll come to the whole the land and things will get taken care of um and and by SBA being able to provide the service I think it's a it's really apart from the right thing to do it's really a great facet that we can that we can provide this it's complicated huh sometimes it is life life is life is that's for sure how do people both here and in Israel find out more about your program to come among how do they hop aboard this wurzweiler bandwagon and you know eventually get to help people the way we've described anyone who's interested in the wertzweiler MSW can just go online Center phenomenal great great opportunity for so many people and yasi joined me and remind the original support I move them I mean you don't have to go through your entire daily schedule for us but there are specific types of cases I'm sure that you have in mind when you're asking along with me for people to support what you're doing I mean you're probably thinking of of those underprivileged kids that are in really serious situations and thinking about families that can really use some help tell everybody out there why they should support everybody that moved them as much as they can yeah you know it's everyone's pain is unique to their own experience and it doesn't make a difference whether it's someone dealing with us an alcoholic spouse it doesn't make a difference if it's someone's own uh history of trauma something that uh from their history something in the present tense everyone's pain is is real for them um and it's it it becomes equally tragic um and I mean that in a sensitive way not in an insensitive way right and we need your help uh and wouldn't survives by everyone's generosity and kindness uh keeping us afloat it's it's a donation driven organization everybody around the world United States Israel and Beyond support I moved them right now unite2heal.com unite to heal.com ayossi goldberstein director of Israel thank you and the hum among director of Yeshua University's Works Wireless School of Social Work in Israel thank you both very very much thank you for having us unite2heal.com please be as generous as possible we're in the first hour of a 36 hour campaign the first hour in a campaign that's not just going to be asking for money not just asking for support but presenting some fun stuff holy and squares and discussions about comedy and sports and so many other things and some serious conversations as well about mental health and education and philanthropy with unique titles check out the schedule scroll down unite to heal.com scroll down and check out the schedule of what to expect from our friends that moved the majority bids over the next 36 hours and you'll see exactly what I mean so amazing segments I can't wait for this segment that I did with Riften to air Layman and London sit down to schmooze at 6 PM eastern time tonight holy and squares happens at 10 o'clock right after this hour which is a bunch of fun a big green update with an amazing panel coming up at 11 A.M Eastern Time Sports and mental health with great personalities coming up at noon Eastern Time behind the bema highlights at 2 p.m please make sure to tune in as much as you can over the next 36 hours for the track record of proven phenomenal programming that unite the heel and ahmud and presents each and every year a big thank you to our friends at flowmotion we'll be here tomorrow night between 6 and 9 eastern time make sure to be tuned in for the final hours of our broadcast a special thank you to the entire staff here and of course all the wonderful people with amudim and charity bids and a special thank you to our producer this morning Miriam L Wallach I am told that tomorrow Ellie schwabel is going to be part of our broadcast tomorrow night many of you are familiar with the incredible revolutionary song that he introduced last year we get the opportunity to talk about the aftermath one year later that incredible song which has saved lives and helped families we'll discuss that tomorrow night also speaking of Music we're about a minute away from a brand new song one of the brand new songs that maishi tishler has released and now it's available in a brand new video prepared specifically for the debut this morning here at unite2heal.com so everybody out there get ready for a great video more debuts of so many great segments and so many wonderful conversations it's all happening during this 36 hour campaign unite2heal.com is the place to support amudim tomorrow night we're going to find out and I certainly hope it'll be in the affirmative whether we achieved our goal for this year but it's millions of dollars that are required for ahmudib in New York in America in Israel and in the entire world to help those in need whether it's teenagers young adults young marrieds small families large families older families ahmudum is there as you heard yesi say earlier to address everybody's issues of pain mean those situations that are causing pain for individuals and families we need you to support ahmudim and let them continue this amazing work Case by case family by family all these donations are so impactful they are literally saving lives it is now with great pleasure that unites a heal and unite2heal.com and I move them and charity bids and all of us debut this brand new video It's called Actos togetherness Unity here is maishi tishler foreign [Music] oh is [Music] myself [Music] baby [Music] this is true [Music] foreign [Music] foreign [Music] of course by ahmudim we're at the end of hour number one of this incredible 36 hours a big thank you to Rey's Thon I'm told that Ray's Thon again a big big thank you for all the help in this campaign I've also been told by Robert spiegluck who rejoins me that we are over 240 thousand dollars already on our way to Millions at a very successful campaign and keep in mind that every dollar you give is quadrupled which means when you give a hundred dollars it's really four hundred dollars and when you get five hundred dollars it's really two thousand dollars and when you give eighteen hundred dollars that's 72 hundred dollars we spoke about these donations being impactful not only they impactful in the field for all these cases to be done internationally for those who need amudim but they're impactful because every time you give it's literally being quadrupled all right Steve Glock is CEO and co-founder of amudim welcome back we're in the middle of uh or actually at the end of hour number one ready to got some incredible presentations a wonderful 36 hours all leading up to tomorrow night's Grand Finale when I know we're going to achieve our goal I learned a lot of things this hour right what can one learn in one hour it's only an hour I learned that your case managers go through the incredible work that they do every one of them completely immersed into whatever the situation is to help that individual or family I learned about actus I love the new song with uh with marshy titsler I learned about the mental health issues that of Remy gurari brought to our attention and it's so amazing to see how positive he is after what his family has gone through but he's just moving forward and trying to help as many people as possible and of course we learned about you know we've spoken about ahmudum Israel and how you're International and how the need I remember when you first introduced there was a need to get to Israel but now we spoke to a couple of people who are on the front lines and have described us exactly how it works every single day over there in Israel so in one hour of my Gluck we could learn a lot about him um yeah we could and I have to say that first of all avrami garari is is an inspiration uh you know and a lot of the stuff that he spoke about you know I'm proud to say that uh we have discussed at length and we have agreed to try to partner on some of these projects and try to help get it to the next level um you know there is still a lot of hesitation in the from world for new ideas but um you know when I go with him someplace or when he speaks to people so we actually just spoke outside for a few minutes I gave him the quick updates about some of the new things that amudum is doing you know we're opening up our own clinics so we can defray the course like you heard from Heritage Israel you know Israel was initially open to be a transition location for clients that were going there for seminary in Yeshiva and now it's a full-fledged you know operation with you know I mean therapists full Clinic you know case management and we get requests from other countries all the time but you know there's a lot of you know things involved in doing it but that's why we help people wherever we can but avrami has been a real inspiration and we look forward to doing more with him and our staff death in Israel you know led by yasi goldbergstein is just it just makes it's just so heartwarming to see how you know these things are growing and I must say this you know it's really unfortunate it is what it is that men decline all of a Shalom my partner and the one who pushed me to the limits and I still feel him pushing me you know did so much but you know I say this all the time when we first started nobody ever dreamed that you know within nine years it would be over 14 000 individuals that we've helped and over 40 something countries around the world over close to 43 States within the United States and it was really a vision that thousands during a pandemic oh the pandemic was uh you know we we people always say to me why'd you get involved in that I said listen everybody had to step up in areas they can help I mean but at the end of the day it's it's such a heartwarming thing and I must say that when we do events like this and every year I always tell people it's not just an inspiration for us and for our staff but it's also so inspirational for the clients for those that need help that they see people are coming out to support such a cause it gives them that that oomph as well because so often people that are struggling they feel like they're all alone and you know we can't have that I want to make two points uh based on what you just said first of all it sounds like in the aftermath of this conversation that avramiji's idea of sort of a hot Salah for mental health is not that far off right now that's exactly the way he described it but there's something there his idea for having and I'll say this is traditionally in the EMS World mental health is always viewed as like one of these things where like EMS people will show up and I'm not blaming them they work hard and we all work I've been a paramedic for 20 some odd years and it's almost like oh we feel that there's a problem we're going to get the police involved and things get escalated and and to have a system in place of de-escalation in the sense of being able to get people to the proper Healthcare mental health facilities is so important and I definitely agree that we do need to work on the pre-hospital end of of that tremendously the other thing on the point that was in the conversation that Jesse was involved with it's obvious that you made the smart move of of making sure to put into place people who are very familiar with the culture of the area you can't just take it on with them staff member and Transplant them to Israel you need someone who understands as much as their similarities we did emphasize the similarities but there's so many cultural differences and nuances that you made sure to find an expert in that area we actually have learned that the hard way I'm not gonna you know meaning even when we opened an Israel things were really good but we we did learn that part the hard way and we're dealing now with a bunch of cases in Canada and in the United Kingdom and and where you also need people so we started finding local people that were able to deal with regularly as these clients are calling us we get to understand the culture there the types of care that's there so while we may not have an actual formative office location yet but the over 250 clients in Canada they need to be cared for based on what's going on in Canada and am I right that you had either a European or South American component wasn't there no no not a component but we've we've become tax deductible we've opened up arms in in the United Kingdom and in Canada so people can make donations but it was not designed for us to get donations to America it's to help us cover the expenses of all the clients we're helping there you know we have to pay for therapy for clients in in Canada pay for people in the United Kingdom especially where you have socialized medicine it makes it so much more difficult so understanding the systems and the nuances is so key so while we may not have a physical office but we have hundreds of people that were helping and having boots on the ground being able to guide us and talk to us is such an important piece and now we're dealing with that with Panama uh with Mexico I mean we're literally I mean we're supposed to be going to South Africa to do a big training there to get the schools involved I mean it's it's it's beautiful it's scary and but I just have to say people often say you know it's like scary how the numbers are increasing cerebellum Brittany who always manages to tell us no it's not that more people are having problems it's more people are feeling comfortable to reach out for help wow you mentioned therapy some people you know a they're skeptical could you just give us a half a minute on why the therapy and the therapists are so effective so I mean the reason why people are skeptical is because of what I like the world the dirty s word the shuttle world and they're scared of what the stigma is going to be associated with it but I'm proud to say I myself I'm in therapy every week I'm not embarrassed about it you're saying this to an international I will say this to anybody I go to therapy every single week and I think people need to understand that it is a way that keeps us healthy Keeps Us grounded and it works and you know what I'm living in a very high stressed environment and it's important and people should not be embarrassed just having that ability to get something off someone's chest we're not even talking about finding the magic one just to be able to talk to somebody without any judgment than knowing that this person is going to keep it private keep it a secret and then help work through whatever issues you know people have and I see it from myself therapy is extremely important Rabbi Glock thank you for uh for your leadership in this area and I wish all of us good luck did I moved in by tomorrow night has achieved its goal excellent so do I thank you everybody out there here's your opportunity your opportunity to be a tremendous Ambassador for ahmud I'm not just a donor but an ambassador telling your friends and relatives around the world how important this cause is how critical the need is out there and making sure to donate as much as you can remember every single donation could you imagine every single donation is quadrupled your 18 is 72 and your 100 is 400 etc etc somebody who gives a thousand dollars is really giving four thousand talk about impact talk about making sure to get out there and give to the point where your donation means so much that's what's happening now with hamudin so please we have 36 hours of fantastic programming holy and squares is next the Hindi update is coming up Sports and mental health Jewish music philanthropy has said technology Torah comedy it's all going to be included in the next 36 hours we're going to rejoin you tomorrow night at 6 p.m Eastern Time everybody for this incredible finale of The Campaign so make sure to join us all throughout these 36 hours and continue to give at unite2heal.com my name is natham Siegel be as generous as possible let's make this campaign a very successful campaign for ahmudim foreign [Music] [Applause] [Music] [Applause] thank you [Music] thank you they're trying to get a direct line of x's or O's diagonally up and down or across and they do that by asking when I ask a celebrity a question they all have an opportunity to agree or disagree with their answer if they're right they get the square if not the other contestant will get the square that's how it works our celebrities are all set coin toss backstage determined who begins our game and we are starting with Yoni Z Yoni choose a celebrity please all right um let's start with the birthday boy Shalom lemmer happy birthday Shalom everybody appreciate it gets our first question and here it is uh when avram freed told this singer a voice like yours comes along once in a generation I just wish it wasn't my generation who is he talking to he was talking to Mordechai and David Yoni Z agree or disagree I agree I agree the answer is MBD X gets the squared we're off to a great start all right Shaya choose a celebrity we're gonna go with my old classmate are you a counselor [Applause] uh recorded albums for scalene sotmer Bob of and boyan though he himself was a khasid of which Dynasty um but I but I kind of I'm sure am I wrong is that your answer yeah Arya says agree or disagree that is totally Incorrect and he's disagreeing and it should he did because the answer is dare circle gets the square I was hoping okay as we move on to Joni the only way on the board are we going okay we're gonna see okay Mom let's see I'm just trying to get some strategy in the game here okay so nothing personal to anyone simcha leiner you are perfectly situated for this next one let's go listen to liner welcome to the show here we go according to the kalbot school website Rabbi kambach received his smiha from which of the following rabbinic leaders his father Robin Cutler so being that I live really close to wherever Aaron Cutler lived it would be a disservice to choose anyone else so I say a barn color who also inspired the song Luis obis I'm in full agreement with Santa there and uh unfortunately for you the answer is and now has an opportunity to really do some damages okay who are you going for no question at least rainbow Center Square for this game Ellie hello are you really well I'm very excited to like win this for you baby I'm with you let's go all right this is a tough one here we go the Smithsonian music spirituality exhibit right so Smithsonian Institute has a playlist with a waltz from this Hasidic Group which one is it so so just to my zaidi foreign and I love nagoon and for me what I consider the greatest of all time is the majita is the majita dynasty so for me guaranteed 100 It's gotta be the budgets the Magic's uh Dynasty Shaya agree or disagree well he's a very artsy guy I'm gonna have to go with it and the answer is much it's congratulations and we're gonna move on to the second game in this round of holy squares and contestants [Applause] [Music] thank you foreign [Music] [Applause] squares presented by ahmudin and powered by our friends at charity bids congratulations to uh Shia heft he's the winner of round one and he will play the winner of this round we have at The X Podium Aviva Gluck welcome I will note you are a sort of returning Champion you've won this game before and right by motion mayorfeld is here by mayor Feld here at the Circle Podium welcome to the show a pleasure and Aviva we had a coin toss backstage and you've been chosen to go first please choose a celebrity I'm going to start with Benny Friedman Benny offset name the prime minister of Israel who has a Milwaukee Public School named after them well being from the Midwest um I'm a I'm a very a very strong Aficionado on all things Milwaukee and um the only problem is that I don't know anything about Israeli Prime Ministers but this particular answer I happen to know and it is the answer called Golda mayor Aviva agree or disagree I'm gonna go out on a limb and I'm gonna and the answer is golden mate here next gets the square nice job there Benny and Aviva and Robin Airfield we're gonna go on the board okay I'm gonna go smack in the Middle with shulum letter show him he's got the Center Square shalomer we have the following question for you this city was the first city in America to have an a-roof well it's kind of obvious people that are the most against the Arab probably had it the longest do we use this it's enough time it's enough time to become you know is it good is it not good finally there's so many sides so I would say uh I'm not gonna say Brooklyn I'm actually going to say Manhattan Lower East uh hmm you know what probably in the Bronx Solomon says the Bronx right mayor felt agree or disagreement although I love you I'm gonna have to disagree with you the answer is Louis and circle gets to Center Square and Aviva you choose the next time I am gonna go with simpler please if you won the Uber cup which sport are you best at if I won the Uber cup uh I'm not really a sports buff but being that I grew up in England and sucker really was uh whether even even if you didn't watch any media just living near Wembley Stadium you really got to know why is the traffic today it's the Uber cup so I'm gonna have to go with the soccer uh Viva agree and disagree honestly I have no idea what the Uber cup is but because something simple is from England but I agree with him and the answer is badminton and circle gets the square and I may have felt finds himself in a very interesting position Rabbi here we go I'm going to go with my dear friend from Manchester England surely Port Nori all right it's really important here we go here's your question which of these singers did not get their start with the Miami Boys Choir which of these singers did not get their start with the Miami Boys Choir Mordechai Shapiro maishi tischler yaakov schwecky and slimy Dax I am gonna go with yaakov shwekey he says yaakov shwekey agree and disagree Rabbi I am going to Grieves really and the answer is maishi tischler and X gets the square and now Aviva has a chance to move ahead and move on to the next round Aviva what are we doing here I am going with slimy Kaufman Captain you're all set let's do it let's do it come on let's get you a win 36 years ago one of the founding producers of the Hass concert wanted to add a spartic spice to the already unprecedented lineup of Mordechai Ben David and avram freed who did he choose well since I was a hearty age of single digits back then I was listening to music all day and I couldn't wait for a Sparty singer in the market so I'm gonna go with Sandy shmueli he answered Sandy schmaley I'll be about agree at this group I'm gonna disagree the answer is though yeah thank you very much Rabbi thank you Aviva goes up against Shia in the final of this round of this game they have holy and squares coming up get ready everybody a final's gonna be great foreign [Music] [Applause] welcome back everybody it's time for the championship round for this game of holding squares presented by amugum empowered by our friends at charity Beach our celebrities already our contestants are ready and it's going to be Aviva Gluck against Shaya hat for the championship round and before we get started let me ask both contestants what it's like to be here on behalf of amuda maviva what are your thoughts on the uh on being here for Hollywood Squares well I really can honestly say that out of all the people involved in this production I probably give the most time of my life to amudim since I'm married to speak luck and it is a pleasure to be supporting my husband as the wife behind the man all right fantastic what do you say about being here on behalf of our meeting it's my pleasure to be here as a therapist in The Firm Community I have very much utilized myself to Services when we do on many of my clients so they asked me to be here I cleared the day and with my pleasure I'm here and you both find yourselves in the championship round all right here we go everybody a coin toss backstage determined that the circle Podium is going to begin the championship game that means Shia you need to choose a celebrity oh Benny uh Benny Friedman all right here we go Center Square as he's known while its official name is congregation kahila thiakov most people know this Manhattan shul as what I just read that book I just read that book it's called the 85th Street synagogue 85th Street synagogue Shaya agree or disagree I'm gonna go with it he agrees the answer is the kalbach shul and X gets the Center Square Aviva time for you to choose and I'm gonna go with lady falkowitz all right Blade the old set welcome to the show uh what is Rabbi Jacob snowman's relationship to the royal family of England Rabbi Jacob snowman what's his relationship to the royal family of England that might be but while he was in England he may have been involved in something else you like the buffing your mouth say it again he enjoys visiting the moment he was a visitor was he a well-known visitor was he a visitor with a purpose what could you tell us about the rabbi are you gonna go with that yes all right a visitor to Buckingham Palace Aviva agree or disagree um I think I should have gone to something simple for this question [Laughter] Benson who are all first names of what Benson Armin Eden are all first names of Benson Armand Edith all first names oh of opera singers opera singers in the 50s those are the those are the first things of the Opera singers I forgot the last name but I know for a fact I remember this The Three Tenors 100 Shaya agree or disagree Ellie can you sing me one of their songs yeah sure [Music] yeah no it's definitely not nope you disagree disagree the answer is they are the first names of kosher wedding halls Benson Chateau Armin Paris and Eden Palace and circle gets the square on that one and we move on no I saw it all right I experienced it Ellie Aviva where are we going um I'm gonna go with simple liner please uh in November of 1973 Rabbids and Esther younggrice made history with the group he Nani selling out Madison Square Garden and it inspired the title track of hinene by the one and only Mordechai Ben David who wrote the lyrics to that song oh that's a great question um my sister-in-law is actually rabbit from younger I said as a granddaughter so for that reason I should know the answer that I actually don't um I will assume that it was written by a recent growth say it again I recent gross interesting uh Aviva agree or disagree I apologize simpa but I'm gonna disagree with you and the answers are by nuts and Sherman and X gets the square and we move on to Shia looks like I'm double trapped oh this is going to be interesting where does he go what is the strategy is the question all right we gotta go with swirly they're really important oh you're all set for the question which singers did matisya Scribe by saying the following I don't think you could pull one of his songs that didn't have quotes from the Torah or Old Testament which singer's music was he describing when he said that um well I think that Bob Marley was probably one of his earliest influences and Bob Marley also is very big into posing some very good stuff so I'm gonna go with what do you think I'm gonna agree the answer is Bob Marley and the circle gets the square but Aviva is left with an opportunity here Aviva I am going to go with Arya kunsler please uh who is the corporate sponsor which company was the corporate sponsor behind the 1967 salute to Israel music festival in Central Park that featured the rabbi Sons I'm gonna go with Macy's because you know parades and all but uh other than Jay and the ass uh I can tell you it wasn't Jam of the am all right Aviva agree or disagree with Arya I am going to disagree the answer is rheingold beer and that means that Aviva is our champion in this game of holy and squares a big thank you to all of our celebrities thanks to our contestants and of course a big thank you to all moved them and our friends at charity Biz keep on watching Everybody plenty more holy and squares is coming up one of amudham's vital initiatives in the realm of substance abuse and addiction that we deal with on a daily basis is our overdose prevention and Narcan training course we have been fortunate to be able to train over 6 000 community members and distribute over 6 000 Narcan kits to out our community we have received an unprecedented amount of phone calls from those that have used the Narcan that we have given them themselves in order to save the lives of their family members their friends or their fellow community members this is just one of the many vital initiatives that is part of the greater amudim mission in order to bring education awareness prevention and confidential response to those that are suffering from substance abuse addiction are victims of sexual abuse various mental illness disorders and the other various crises that they could be facing foreign [Music] our dedicated staffs both in America in Israel and everywhere in between pride ourselves on our willingness and our ability to answer the call from all segments of our community throughout the country and throughout the world no matter what type of Crisis they face whether it is related to our core missions related to sexual abuse substance abuse addiction and mental illness or whether it goes beyond into our government relation individual family or communal crises of All Sorts we have been there to answer the call for over 7 000 clients and their families today we turn to you to please answer our call in helping us and partnering with us so we can not only continue but grow the vital work that we are doing and to be a partner with us and effectively join us in changing lives and building Futures as part of the amudham family [Music] and welcome to Holy and squares presented by Abu dim and powered by our friends at charity Biz over your squares you've been introduced to our incredible celebrities we have two wonderful contestants with an unprecedented contestant matchup going on up here which I'll explain in a moment and we are ready to play you know the rules the simple game of tic-tac-toe each one of our contestants will choose a celebrity we'll ask that celebrity a question they'll agree or disagree and determine if they get that the specific square and once somebody has either diagonally up and down or straight across three in a row they will be the winner of that game at The X Podium we have Andy Bosh welcome Shane d at the Circle Podium we have a grummy barge welcome on from me unprecedented husband and wife going up against each other in holy in squares how do you like that [Applause] [Music] foreign [Music] we had a coin toss backstage before the game and the X was chosen to begin all right Shandy who do we go to which celebrity for our first question I'm gonna choose Barry all right Barry Mitchell welcome to the show thanks for having me a pleasure here's your question what America West City became known for having the first Jewish hospital in America Oh I thought it was multiple choice not this one an American city in the Midwest known for having the first Jewish hospital in America surprisingly you know this answer because I used to volunteer for an Outreach organization that their chapter their region was actually the Midwest region so I would have to say Chicago okay I'll be Chicago okay Barry says Chicago agree disagree Sandy I don't think Barry knows what she's saying but I would have guessed the same thing so I will agree and the answer is Cincinnati the circle gets the square okay I'm gonna go with Daniela in the middle Square hi to you Boston dietitian Bertha wood said Jewish children were high strung over excited and irritable because their diets had too little milk and vegetables and too much what okay so I would say that she is correct because they don't have enough candy uh we all know that all of our children on Chavez eat lots of candy and even though we think it's a lot it's not enough so our kids need more candy more kiddish more junk and then be healthier all right what do you think okay well I would like to discuss about the whole first of all kosher restaurants it's all about the dairy everywhere we go Dairy is so much easier than meat so I think that doctor's wrong to begin with so I actually don't think that candy is what he was referring to so I'm gonna disagree all right the answer is pickles my favorite snack where are you gonna go I have a feeling you know the answer to that new show thank you so much for having me we have a question for you and here it is according to tribe according to tribe what is the minimum number of followers one needs to qualify as a micro influencer what is the minimum number that one must have to be a micro influencer do you have an answer I do have an answer um so this past year I was actually featured in a movie and I was confused as to how an actress at you know my status could eventually get to the point where Paparazzi are following me so I actually inquired with a Paparazzi like Father company and they said the minimum amount of followers you need in order to be qualified as an influencer to be followed you know in the streets and be photograph is ten thousand yeah what do you think so if I agree and she's right I get an X that is correct and if I disagree and she's wrong and you'll also get an X I disagree yes the answer is three three I agree with that rummy go ahead what do you got here for us I forgot to think strategy for a second okay hold on we're gonna go we're gonna go to Elizabeth all right Elizabeth Sutton welcome to the show help me out come on thank you what does the s in mcsy stand for what does the s in ncsy stand for the ads in ncsy stands for students because honestly I would always just go with whatever anyone's saying the answer is not right because by process of elimination we're not going to be right and I'm not gonna like if you're smart you would go with whatever oh for all these answers what we are not saying is my gut is my gut feeling others wow this answer came with a bunch of game advice I like that cancer is stupid student uh agree or disagree on me um students how many students do they have in that institution yeah I would assume tens of thousands tens of thousands maybe it is participated as a student you yeah I was a student so if you were a student and you probably didn't attend so much so it probably doesn't mean for students so I'm actually going to disagree the answer is synagogue and circle yes and now uh Sandy I think you only have one option what do you want to do I mean I'm double trapped as they say that I'm double how am I losing okay I always wins this stuff we're gonna own this where do you want to go let's go For Cami [Music] uh the question is when a recipe calls for a pinch when a recipe calls for a pinch about how much is needed to make a pinch how much of a real measurement is needed to make a pinch I want to say because I'm a big ger cooker all that stuff and I know that baking is pretty exact so when they say like a pinch of salt I've actually put it into a measuring spoon and it's one-fourth of a teaspoon agree or disagree Shandy hmm I am debating if it's a fourth or an eighth I'm gonna agree uh the answer is a quarter of a teaspoon [Music] I don't think okay um all right uh Esther Freeman help me out bail me out help me win this round let's go all right after you're all set yeah here we go this is a uh this is a question if people know their food and their history in the 70s and 80s there's a very popular restaurant in New York called La difference a French restaurant it was located in what legendary Manhattan hotel while differance was located in what legendary Manhattan hotel I'm from Miami New York many many many times and I have been in many different hotels in New York and I currently live in New York but this is a very unassum assumption and that is in the Marriott Hotel I'm gonna agree the answer is the Roosevelt Hotel okay all right who's gonna be Mayan are you gonna help me out here oh no don't choose me all right so Mayan is our choice with 487 million Instagram followers Cristiano Ronaldo is the world's number one social media influencer what line of work is he in oh gosh um I'll say fashion uh Shandy what do you think I definitely disagree the answer is he's a very very famous soccer player I knew that I actually do that because congratulations and we have another game coming up and we'll see Shane D again she'll take on the winner of the next round coming up right here on holy you squares [Applause] [Music] foreign [Music] foreign [Music] welcome to round two of holy it's squares presented by a moodin and powered by our forensic charity Biz we have two new contestants up here the winner of this game of course we'll go up against shanby who won our first game Kyla Kaufman is at the expodium viola welcome to the show thank you all excited oh yeah all right excellent and Silvia Cohen at the Circle Podium welcome to you thank you both of you are set to begin we had a coin talk backstage Circle won that toss which means that Sevilla is going to uh choose the first celebrity where do you want to start um okay I'm gonna go with Danielle Danielle red off is our Center Square welcome to the show and here we go by weight what is the most produced crop in the world this is like right in my wheelhouse of things I know so this is great anything food related amazing and the most produced crap in the world is corn it's actually used for like much more than just food it's used for fertilizer and soil and Building Things and the husks are used and it's grown in all regions all over the well not all regions but all over the world in many different regions and that's my answer so if you agree and disagree oh boy okay she said that really confidently so either she's just really good at making stuff up where she's right so I'm gonna agree the answer is corn circle gets to Center Square you're welcome okay so tic-tac-toe when you take the middle that's the best one what's the second to best spot um I'm gonna take Elizabeth Sutton here's the question the question is after water and tea what is the most commonly consumed beverage in the world so I'm going to have to go with milk um we all drink it we have to I've had to include certain populations I'd love to say American soda but in the world I'm gonna have to go with milk Kyla agree to disagree um I would say coffee so I'm gonna disagree all right the answer is beer and excessive Square you were right and uh good move all right Cynthia Cohen where do we go okay so let's see if I want to double trap Kyla I'm gonna go with Cami we have a question for you the earliest known music recording was a song sung in what language English French or Spanish I'm gonna go with French only because I feel like Opera is like in that European language and a lot of songs are in French that we sing to our children like nursery rhymes so I'm gonna go with French Silvia what do you think um I am going to I'm really just guessing I'm gonna agree the answer is French and circle square [Applause] see how Kyle is going to play this which celebrity are you choosing welcome to the show I'm atar to combat the effects of overfishing an upper west side synagogue announced in September that they'd be banning which fish from its Shabbos kiddish menu hmm well I do know that Herring is has been used their farming Herring now because there was a shortage and being that this is synagogue related and Herring is a primary fish you'd find on our table I would say herring Kyla agree with disagree I agree the answer is locked and that means Circle Jackson Square oh but does not win the game we are playing by the traditional Hollywood Squares rules let's take away that Circle in order to win the game you must earn the square by the way four days later the ban unlocked to that Jewel was taken away because of the Uproar that it caused among its membership uh all right tibia for the win who are you choosing can I choose my tar again certainly okay there we go let's get this strategy in this case that's for sure um matar as we get older does our tolerance for pain increase or decrease okay so this is a deep rooted one um I I know from research that our tolerance for pain actually decreases we find things a lot harder to deal with we find things just just yeah our our struggles become a lot harder to endure and it's because of our as we get older our narrow-mindedness and our self-awareness sometimes is not we're not as self-aware as we were when we were younger and also our fears get more intense as we get older because of our worldly awareness it does you know trigger our fears so I will say that our tolerance gets decreases all right tolerance pain decreases according to the answer you want to agree or disagree I am actually going to disagree with this the answer is it decreases X gets the block and now we go to a completely different game let's go this is an interesting tournament should I start guessing who you're going to be choosing okay yes sir that's you Esther Freeman you ready for this one I would say it's because I'm blonde that she's choosing me and I love your music that's pretty funny oh thank you all right no help from anybody who's in Israel Esther you're not in Israel now are you no I'm in New York okay no help from anybody in Israel what is the value of Israel's highest new shekel note the currency in Israel is a new sheko what's the value of the highest the largest denomination of new shekel notes the highest denomination like hmm this is a tricky one because I don't live in Israel right now and I haven't been there for a couple of years but I'm throwing you off your game aren't I um I'm going to say a thousand shekels what do you think of three I'm gonna disagree the answer is 200 new Israelis technology congratulations and Kyle is going to be taking on Sandy in round number two actually round number three the championship round of this game coming up as you keep it right here at Holy youth squares [Applause] foreign [Music] [Applause] welcome back it's time for the championship round of holding youth squares we've got two amazing contestants up here Shane D Bosch is to my right in the X Podium Shane the all seven Championship rounds yeah we're gonna kill it I know you want to all right tell me about them and what it's like for you to be here for this great cause I'm so happy I have the opportunity to be here amudim is doing such incredible things for our community and it's just so amazing to know that we have support if anyone needs anything in the mental health areas it's just so nice to have a mood in have your back they are amazing Hoffman you all separate a championship round yes what are your thoughts being here with the Abu Dem organization so it's wonderful to be here I know it's V Glock and I moved in for many many years and watching the growth throughout the years have been it's it's outstanding um I'm proud to have witnessed so much growth and so happy to be here to contribute my little bit and I'm so excited to do what I can to help amuda all right now everybody put on your game face because it's time for a championship play of holy squares we did have a coin toss backstage and the Kyle of the circle Podium is going to be going first Hilo where do we start okay let's start with Amy all right Amy you all set I'm ready here is your question here's your question everyone knows that the diamond is the hardest precious stone in the world what's second after the diamond I would say the black onyx is second after diamonds Kyla agree disagree I'm gonna disagree the answer is Sapphire Circle gets the square we go to Changi who gets to choose a celebrity go ahead Sandy okay Elizabeth you got me all right assistant here's your question uh topping out at around 2.2 million on the Scoville scale what is the name of the world's hottest pepper oh my God my son is obsessed with this wait I actually know the answer and oh my God I buy them for him in Cheetos you need to give me a second he's gonna be like oh my God no this is you know I actually know the answers to this but I'm forgetting right now I need to call a friend like one of these Cooks oh no you know what's really bothering me he talks about this all the time and it's like what the heck is wrong with me oh my God we're waiting for that aha moment no it's gonna kill me I need I need to call a friend I need to call my son you want to guess maybe uh think of the annals of your pepper experience just let me know if it's a guess you know what I mean another one that I want to say it really bothering me I'm gonna say habanera all right I don't even know that I'm gonna disagree the answer is the Carolina Reaper that is the hottest oh my son talks about this all the time I don't think the X gets the square and Kyle is going to choose AKA celebrity um trying to think um I'm gonna go with Danielle hi the question is on March the 18th of 1922 Judith Kaplan made history by becoming the first American to celebrate what on March 18th she became the first American to celebrate St Patrick's Day I disagree the answer is I was going to say kaplan's pretty Jewish I mean Saint Pat Irish but Daniella that was great that was that was a great that was great what do we got all right let's do Barry uh all right do you go to Barry mitchman Barry all set here we go ready I am giving a a little disclaimer that one might consider this to be a trick question I don't know if that's going to help you or not but I'll just keep that in the back of your mind and here is the question after Cheerios and Frosted Flakes respectively what's the third best-selling cereal in the world see I know this because I have two tiny little humans who um demand cereal for breakfast lunch and dinner and I gave my children breakfast cereal and then my son asked me to put some in a bag for him and it's not a trick question because you say Cheerios but that's basic Cheerios we're talking Honey Nut Cheerios sir uh agree or disagree I had no idea what was going on but once you said Honey Nut Cheerios I'm so with that I agree and the answer is Honey Nut Cheerios are you ready for your question let's go and let's go is right and here it is in which you know that was so silly I have two x's oh my gosh I just noticed the screen can I yeah okay fine you know what I'm gonna let James you in the car she thinks she's winning a car so let's just do this let her see there's no car okay backstage and give it a big sign of relief they didn't have to deal with weatherbitar or Daniela should go all right Daniella here's the question which country has the world's largest aquarium which country on this globe has the world's largest aquarium I'm gonna go with the United States they're the biggest best let's say United States USA Phila what do you think I'm gonna disagree and the answer is China which means Victory first where should we go Shandy we're gonna have matar win the game with me let's go here we go pictures on and here's the question what's the largest known mammal in the world what's the largest known mammal in the world I do believe there are mammals in the ocean so I'm gonna say that the largest mammal is the whale because I do remember reading that and then uh you know testing myself okay yeah I think it's I think the largest mammal is the whale so I have the same debate in my head I think that that's what I also remember from fifth grade so I'm gonna agree well the answer is blue whale and that is going to qualifying [Applause] of these games [Music] foreign [Music] if you need help and you're seeking help or giving guidance or a few of questions or if you have a therapy referral we're here for you I can tell you there is nothing that any client can tell me that I haven't heard before everyone thinks they're the only person they're the only person who's ever been abused they're the only person who's addicted to prescription medication that's how a person feels when they're struggling alone we want to help you we want to listen we want to make you the best version of a person that you can possibly be it kind of gives me hope that these people who are suffering so much are willing to reach out to a stranger to ask for help it gives me hope for the future for our future Generations that we're getting somewhere just pick up the phone if you're hesitating don't say oh I'll do it tomorrow just do it right there and then we're here for you we want the best for you we want the best for this world we want you to be healthy and happy and live the best life foreign in addition to education and prevention program of darjenu in addition to our training of verbonims and Community leaders in addition to our overdose prevention programs and in addition to Our God's boys program for teens at risk our main focus of confidential comprehensive clinical case management is overwhelming right now between insurance and our therapy subsidy fund it costs forty eight hundred dollars a year to provide therapy to a client in need for that entire year the truth is that one person is in an entire universe it's not just a life it's Generations each and every client is also having a strong impact on their present or future spouse children and the divers that are going to follow from them we need your financial support we need you to open up your hearts your minds and your pockets as much as possible and partner with us in an effort so together we can unite to heal [Music] one tremendous benefit that amudim provides is particularly when people are in a time of trouble they've clowned her that's when they're the most alone the time that they need help the most is somehow when people find themselves the most alone their support system isn't sure how to help them their friends might be a little uncomfortable with whatever they're going through and they're alone and that's when a modem steps in and provides a pillar of support at the time when people find themselves alone amudim is there to support them it does the substantive work that we all need to be done and modem goes and does it salaries need to get paid rent needs to get paid medical care it all needs to get paid so money is for better or worse and it's the lifeline of an organization that what the organization does that's what's critical it needs money in order to be able to do its work foreign [Music] I didn't think I'd make it this far if only my family knew but how can I tell them what happened to me what my uncle did to me 30 years ago no I can never tell them [Music] make a wish honey [Music] it's like it was yesterday my uncle babysitting me taking me into my room [Music] what am I doing here praying for what [Music] daddy yesterday I wish I could be there for them but I can't I'm paralyzed if they knew what I let him do to me they would hate me how could I let that happen to me real men don't get abused they protect themselves foreign [Music] I was exactly my son's age when it all started [Music] I can't get close to him [Music] I get so angry [Music] we're going out later we're going to celebrate the McGuire case to come out I feel like I can't breathe like I'm going to explode I have no reason to be on this Earth my life helps no one no one can understand what this is like [Music] this has to stop my life is out of control [Music] my family will be much better off without me my life can never be fixed I'm hopeless [Music] there's only one way out [Music] after 40 years I thought my story was over but I was wrong my family does need me and there is hope [Music] to be my story is just beginning [Music] foreign [Music] so excited you could join us we're here on behalf of amudim for the United Hill event tonight for the next half an hour we're going to discuss teenagers we love our teenagers of course when they're sleeping but uh our greatest challenge but perhaps Hashem gave us teenagers so we can work on ourselves and do the ratsun Hashem in a different way we can become better parents and grandparents to my right are three amazing humans Menches and rabbis I just like to identify who they are before we take a deep Dive Right In now sitting to my right hands Rabbi Seth grower he's in the trenches he's a Russia Shiva of not one but two high schools one for boys one for girls in Toronto and he was really seeing day to day what's going on with her teenagers uh in the middle here is Rabbi krupkin he's the maradasha of Canada's largest shul the buy it a little plug for myself my father-in-law was the architect for the buy it he's the past president of the RCA and he comes from the perspective of speaking to parents who are dealing with teens 13 to 19 10 to 25 with all of their issues um and uh on the far right is Rabbi Dr Akiva tatz really a generational Outreach teacher uh this book is I don't know probably the most famous book for teenagers the thinking Jewish teenager's Guide to Life it's the book I give out uh really before I even got give out a homage to kids for the barn Bar Mitzvah this is the book I give out but the grower is a great skier Rabbi karupkin teaches online and Rabbi tats just told me he has a black belt in Judo now one of those are lying but that's totally irrelevant right now let's go in right now so Rabbi grauer will kick things off uh really we can ask all three of you to answer this question uh things change so much iPhones the the next model is coming out I think we can clearly see the difference between the teenager 10 years ago till today and what's your take on that wow okay huge question to start I'm sure that uh my distinguished colleagues will have what to add as well I would say 2010 was the year that in many ways it was an incredible spike in anxiety depression feelings of inadequacy self-harm among teenagers and there is incredible correlation associated with the fact that that was the year in many ways that social media spiked uh and popularity all sorts of new mechanisms that existed the phones started exploding among our teenagers and again there is so much to say on this topic but just to sort of start off with a small and short sound bite one cannot look past the connectedness between the increase in rise in social media among our high school teenagers and rates of anxiety depression and just feelings and lack of self-esteem and self-concept and self-worth that exists and I think that it took a long time in many ways for many within our community to realize and to recognize the impact that social media here and just the ubiquitous use of internet started having on teens I think now we know and the question is what we're doing about it how we are responding but if I had to sort of pick one point to start us off and to get us going that would be number one on my list um I would um I would only add to what Rabbi grower said which is undoubtedly correct I remember it distinctly because I came to Toronto to buy it almost exactly 11 years ago and there was an article that had just come out in the Canadian Jewish news that was talking about a new phenomenon that was manifesting itself in high school children called half Shabbos now what was half Shabbos it was children from Shoma shabba's homes who were allegedly completely shomer Shabbos except for the fact that They Carried their devices with them and would text on Shabbos that was what they felt was an acceptable keeping of Shabbos but it was they called it half Shabbos and it it was a new phenomenon I can only say that if that's what was manifesting back then in addition to what Rabbi grauer is talking about is the psychological negative impact of social media today the the even greater ubiquity of these devices and the perceived necessity and I say perceived because that's the way our many of our children perceive them uh has only made things go from half Shabbos to maybe for some children it's even less than half Shabbos since then yeah I think that's all correct I think the deeper question to ask is really whether the internet and social media are the cause or maybe just one more symptom of something something deeper and no question we see that young people now are if you speak to people who work with the teens they call it baggage baggage the kids seem to have baggage they didn't seem to have just a few years ago one young lady told me that when the Rama from The Sims came to her City where she lives to interview girls for the Seminary she said Roma I think I need to be honest I can't apply for the same without telling you that I'm on medication you know for anxiety and you probably won't take me he said young lady if I didn't take girls through any anxiety medicine I wouldn't have girls in my in my summary so there's no question this is not only teens by the way we're seeing this across the board anxiety depression medications you know I think it's a social phenomenon in general but it seems to be hitting the teens particularly hard some say there's a general dumbing down as well should go hand in hand with a social media again how much of a cause and how much an effect is not clear I think it's very clear that over the last few years we've seen a precipitous decline in independent thinking and independent self-confidence and these things seem to be manifested you know uh yeah I am a synagogue Rabbi as well Outreach my sense though is that some of the teens uh are taking this powerful tool and doing amazing things with it I mean I I've never bought a stock when I was a teenager I didn't know how to handle money I had a velcro wallet that I lost all the time uh I mean I get the sense that kids today they're they're buying stocks they they know what they're doing they're in control and is is there a positive at all twist with a percentage of them that are actually elevating their game because of so much technology it's like letovin Laura like do we see that at all look I'll I'll share a thought um without a doubt there's definitely no one will disagree with the fact that there is incredible Tove that exists some of the websites are amazing you know the amount of Torah that's consumed on the internet uh kids who are able to put together different Torah and prepare they have lists of websites that they go to and they're able to put together wonderful delivery Torah I think that I'm guilty to some extent in the sense that early on years ago 10 years ago even earlier I was a proponent I was a believer of the internet is here to stay social media is not going anywhere we have to figure out how to integrate it within our lives we have to figure out how to teach our children how to use it in moderation we have to teach them how to be responsible we have to do like we do with everything exists in this world where we take what's given to us and we teach our students our tamidam or tomidot our children how to act responsibly with it and I think that in many ways we misunderstood or at least I could speak for myself just how challenging the pull is of what is a billion dollar industry of which you have huge numbers of really brilliant individuals who are curating content building sites whose sole purpose is it to bring our teenagers our youngsters and you know and go beyond that into emerging adults and later adolescents young adults into the world you know think about it from the following perspective every product has a buyer a seller and the product right that's how business Works everything has to be monetized in a very very important way when it comes to social media the buyer is actually the advertising agencies the advertising content the seller are the companies the product is actually the people the product of the students the product are the teenagers the product are adults of all ages and the difference is at what age are our kids old enough and and responsible enough to be able to consume the material properly in 1998 the United States government set the age of 13 as the age by which consent would not be needed to give out personal information that hasn't been updated since then it's a crazy thing in many ways so yes there is incredible positive content amazing opportunities that exist the question is to what extent are we making a mistake by giving it in an open environment without the proper controls and moderation that really is necessary and I think that in many ways we are still underestimating just the impact of it I would add only that I think more fundamental problem is that we're having trouble with kids and adults as well connecting to their Judaism in a meaningful way you know how much the internet is responsible is an interesting discussion but the problem we're having on the ground as Educators is we're just having a lack of enthusiasm uh concept of a mono where people really feel the Judaism and take it seriously um you know and and and I think I think that's operating on two levels one is General integration as wholesome happy productive people and the second is the Jewish take on that you know which is their attachment to their to their Judaism and I think this is echoing in families so it isn't only the kids having this issue we're seeing it across the board and I think that's the real problem facing us is that there's just a lack of of of meaningful attachment to their duties you know okay within a springboard yeah if I could just build on what Rabbi tats just said um I had an epiphany over the last few months mostly over the summer I brought in someone in my shawl who works with children at the Maine Children's Hospital here in Toronto and studies Neuroscience she was talking about the adverse effects of screen time in General on children that's including devices and iPads and televisions and so forth and she said her point was and it really sort of lit a light bulb in my head her point was that when children are over exposed over stimulated on sensory overload from all of these screens that they're watching all the time there's a part of their brain that shuts down it's the part of the brain that's in charge of imagination of creativity because if everything is is being fed into the brain without the opportunity to pause and to be pensive and to think about ideas independently and to create images in your own mind without this external stimuli it it it it it creates some positive things in the brain but turns off other things that are very dangerous and are counterproductive now as it pertains to Judaism or any religion I guess but we want to focus on Torah and yiddishkite look what is our belief our belief that there are two realities there's the external reality of what we call the Olam hagashmi of this world that we perceive with our senses and then there's a deeper reality there's the Olam a spiritual Dimension which includes God and all of the other creations that God created in this world which are invisible including the the way that our are Mitzvah performance and our prayers interact with the cosmos these are all things that if we don't have imagination if everything that we connect with is visceral and three-dimensional and connected to our physical gashmi world then how can we expect our children to buy into it when that part of their mind has not been cultivated to me this is a very very direct reason why screen time the successive screen time is pulling our children away from religious thought in general because religion requires disconnecting from the physical realities and connecting with something higher and the screen time is constantly bombarding our children with the sole reality of this world she she quoted a statistic that I just wanted to share with you and then I'll be quiet um the Canadian Pediatric Society which is very much in line with the American Pediatric Society understanding the um the the the serious uh threat that screen time poses to our children have said that any child under two years old should not have any screen time at all nothing no cartoons nothing under two years old children two to five should only be exposed to less than one hour a day of screen time and children older than five and ostensibly this would I would assume include teenagers as well should have not more than two hours a day now our children if you go there are apps that can tell you how much how many hours a day our children are on the screen that's two hours every two and a half hours since we're lucky it's unbelievable and and you know correct me if I'm wrong but I I've been told that that children go during their lunch period during their recess period and and they're they're using their screens they're using their devices look there are more and more schools across the religious denominational spectrum that have started to Outlaw smartphones in schools and this really started in many ways in a private school movement you know take a look at Silicon Valley and take a look at some of the most expensive schools that exist there the majority of them that I know of or that I've been exposed to or I've seen have a zero tolerance policy in which they do not allow cell phones in their schools these are some of the executives in the companies who are making the most amount of money off of these Technologies and they don't want to send their own kids to schools that allow cell phones in school because of the impact that Robert cropkin is recognizing it's a tool we have that we can use possibly and that is we are a culture that reads and the difference in reading and screen or television time is that as a rabbi said when you look at this television screen you don't need to imagine it's all there for you you can't read without engaging if you watch the television you can zombie out and be perfectly happy if you read in Zombie Art nothing goes in you got to read it again and Shabbos is a great opportunity for that because you know for the kids are not using their phones and travels if we can stimulate them to read things and to engage in their imagination uh you know there are a couple of Cleveland Cleveland has a printing you know this I think it's called the most dose press have you seen that Cleveland has a press that puts out books for kids and teenagers secular literature that has been vetted from a thorough perspective all of it calculated to be wholesome good imagination driving you know so there is literature you can give kids apart from voluntaril Material as well so perhaps we could put a bit of emphasis on that yeah so I mean I think that many of us that grew up with a TV in their home you had to like there was a room with a TV you have to Fat your siblings for what was on the TV screen and now just everyone has their own screen and you don't even have to be in your house so we get the ubiquitousness of it it's a great challenge um but I do want to take a jump off to something uh a little bit different here which is a a challenge that every every parent has whether you're in the fifth century or today but obviously it's a little bit more challenged today I think because kids feel that they're as we say Amanda Amar like every 10 year old says and every I remember telling my parents I'm 15. I know everything like what do you tell me what to do uh then Mom and Dad I apologize for that I mean your other children were worse I was the better one right um but just like to say like so given now like as a principal as a ibrahisham your parents as well what how do you gauge uh balancing giving your kids freedom freedom to make mistakes freedom to do things that are inappropriate versus following the rules how does a school deal with that and you're also a parent how do you deal with that it's different I would say I tend to uh lean a little bit more towards the authoritarian side of things in the sense that I'm fundamentally a big believer that when you have young kids and this question as to what age that ends there's a parent and a parent has the requirement to set rules look I regularly tell our parents in the context of Shabbos that they should have a technology draw and all technology should go natural and it should be in the kitchen or it should be in a public area and all technology includes laptops and cell phones should go in that draw um on Friday afternoon and it doesn't come out I tell parents regularly that there should be no technology allowed outside of the living room the dining room main areas of the home including you know adult children if they're in the house and they're under your roof these are rules these are guidelines that you said I tell parents that they should turn off their internet at a certain hour of the evening and um you know I don't know what percentage necessarily heed this advice and we have to remember in all of this and I think this needs to be said at the outset we can do everything right and in the end of the day there's an incredible amount of muscle there is no Playbook you don't need a license to become a parent and you can have all the right systems and have everything thought out and all the right strategies and the end of the day how cold is and there's a lot of muscle that goes into it but I think that kids crave order kids in general expect a certain amount of sensibility and structure and they look for that and they want that they love consistency maybe I'll mention it later on but they love when expectations and reality meet up with each other when they match each other that's something I see all the time so I would say from my perspective one should not be so concerned on giving too much Freedom Early on it will come there'll be plenty of time to give the freedom as kids get older and what should uh ER on the other side of the coin as much as possible possible I was supposed to go one two three two one we'll go to our vitats and right back we're up and write tats you know I also personally tend to a more authoritarian view I think it's good for children um I think that one of the rules is that one should say yes to whatever one can you know Judaism and religion in general is rather restrictive we always we've got a lot of things we're not allowed to do so and I learned this from my wife if I may quote her that um where you can say yes to little kids you ought to but then when you say No it should be very firm as well when you draw the line I'd also like to add that a framework of discipline is not only good for children's characters also good for their minds when you think about it the truth is always Limited falsehood is unlimited truth is limited how many right answers are there to a mathematical question one how many wrong answers many you'd want which means that a creative thinker needs to be a discipline thinker and we're not talking about a constrained thinker creative thinkers can think outside the box and break rules but always in paths that are true so when you set up children with a framework of discipline in an organized and structured environment it's good for their behavior as you pointed out it's also good for their minds and it's a paradoxical fact maybe that children accept that they need to be rules that doesn't mean they like to obey them when you're when your 14 year old says you know about nine o'clock it's my bedtime I think I'll go to bed you'll take his temperature the kid's got a fever you know not normal but they know that there need to be rules when a child says to you why are there Rules by the time they ask you for rationalization behind the rules it's much too late right and the right answer to that is not because it's religious or because it's right the only answer you can give it's my house when you get married you can come to dinner without a shirt in this house no shirt no dinner whatever the rule is and that they can't argue against so there are these are the kinds of things you do and I'll add one final thing if I may I think the parents who are dealing with kids who are acting out and difficult and all ages but typically in the teenage years I think it's a parent's obligation to to assert all the discipline you can get away with and wisely turn a blind eye where you're not going to win so if you've got a child doing something on Shabbos in their room behind closed doors whatever it is and insisting on that all you do is lose Authority but I think it's a it's a tragic error to abdicate responsibility where you where you can assert it so I say to parents who having trouble trouble with teenagers what you can get away with this 13 you would definitely need to do that just because you've lost some other battles doesn't mean you have to lose them all beyond what you can assert and get away with you forced to turn a blind eye because you're not going to one of those battles anyway so it's a wise decision you you need to make about which battles are worth fighting which ones are not worth fighting but the ones that you can win that's where you put your foot down and you have a voice of authority and children look up to that I would only add and I don't mean to sound cliche-ish but King Solomon said rlp darco that every child is unique my wife and I have been blessed with a number of children and it's uncanny how different each child is from the other um there is no one fast and steady rule that we can apply to each and every child there are some children who are simply born with a rebellious streak that the more we try to confine them the more they will Rebel there are other children who very much are parent Pleasers and Authority Pleasers and they want to do the right thing and we deal with each child a different way we're going to be reading very shortly parshus told us where yitzhaken Rifka have two very different boys they have a yaakov and they have an ace of two very very different kinds of children and I don't know necessarily that the Torah is trying to tell us to learn parenting lessons from Yitzhak or Rifka or both or a combination but certainly the way that Yitzhak dealt with asev was completely different from the way that he dealt with the more cerebral and Gent teal yaakov and it it could have that story could be an indicator that no matter how much we try to work with our children who are born with that very very um aggressive streak we can only do our best to try and lead them in the right direction not necessarily succeeding and getting getting them to learn 10 years um in in collo but at least getting them to become the great Community leaders that they are supposed to be that that's just I think that's really just the most important messages our children our unique nishamas and we have to assess them as they are husham and try to Cull the wisdom from our own parents from our peers in treating each one as a unique individual [Music] this sort of thing doesn't happen by us not in our community what you're describing just doesn't take place in this community this type of behavior absolutely does not exist in our school [Music] you must be mistaken that sort of thing doesn't happen here something like that would never happen in a school like this foreign it just can't be it's just not possible I've known him for 15 years and he would never do that if he's been with us for so many years why only now did this come up we need 100 Proof he has a family children to marry off he's done so much good this could ruin his life we don't air our Dirty Laundry to the world let's not bring the police into this she's obviously a troubled young lady must be a misunderstanding she must have made a mistake she's confused she's lying it's probably Bad Blood other troubled kids have tried making out but he was never charged I don't need to keep this quiet so we don't hurt the reputation of the shul school Community what if it's not he can't ruin his life we have undeniable I really don't think he's maybe it was a bit inappropriate there was no way I'm not saying he's for her own issues probably protecting the real abuser I'm sorry I can't help you there's nothing I can do I can't I'm sorry this just doesn't happen in our community [Music] foreign [Music] I have some adult children I think we all do and I noticed that some of my children raise their children very differently from the way that my wife and I raised ours and of course as a grandparent you have to you know keep your mouth shut that's the rule of grandparenting you get to enjoy them without the work but the price you pay is you can't say a word and I respect that but sometimes I'm puzzled by the way that I see my adult children negotiating with their children to do the right thing and I sometimes in my own mind find myself questioning whether that's the right way because as both Rabbi tats and Rabbi grower pointed out our children are hungry for structure and if we don't provide it for them they act out in ways that they normally wouldn't so that's just something else to keep in mind so I'd like to add that when we talk about discipline we also continue to talk about the love as well you know that the turmeric formula for education is a very strong left hand and a very strong right hand who was our teacher in this really who incidentally happened to be childless but when we asked him once about how he became such an authority in child racing he said he did have experience how his parents raised him although he never the opportunity to do that with his own children and his teaching was you need an extreme expression of love an extreme expression of discipline and extreme is really extreme I'll tell you a brief story about him which is not for our viewers not for Our Generation but it sets a certain tone he said there was a rule in his parents home's home that if a child asked for something they did not get it I once asked him now why they have a rule like that he said we didn't have you know it was very poor we didn't have parents needed us to know that if we have you'll get if we don't you don't but he told it to us in a discussion of discipline so I know it had its own value and he told us that one day his mother came through the door he talking about baranovic back in that generation his little brother David was four years old only the only two of them had survived the war his mother walked in through the door with a little honey and in Eastern Europe you know that there were no candies there was a tremendous delicacy at age four the child knew that if he asked for some he wouldn't get it so he drew a chair up to the table said I made a loud broker and his mother went to the kitchen and brought him a glass of water you know a modern parent would melt in you know emotion but you know and they turned out the people they turned out we can't do that to our children but we can do the equivalent at the level we capable of look along the lines though of what you're saying in the context of parents negotiating with teenagers a colleague of mine who's the principal of an elementary school shared with me last year that they happen to have overheard an incident in which a mother brought their little kindergarten to school to look at the classroom to look at the school and then they walked over in the corner and they turned the mother this principal heard the mother turn into the little kid and said so now remember two days ago you went to this school yesterday was this school today you're here which one of the three do you like the best okay and it's a crazy story but it was a true story basically the mother was turning to this kindergarten and asking the child which one did you like the best which toys were the nicest which colors are the best again I don't know what ended up happening in the context of the choice that was made but it could be a bit ridiculous well there is what to be said about empowering children and giving them the sense that perhaps they are in control of their Destiny but it has to be done as you say within reason I want to throw a curveball question here as we're on the sort of topic to just if one or all of you can answer this question how do you deal with the fact that okay now you have a kid that's your 10 year old your 12 year old and you're giving your 10 year old just a lot more privileges because that kid needs it and then the the immediate older kid and the media younger kid sees that hey it's not fair you know I I have to go I have to do that by 11 my younger kid my younger sibling is has Netflix in the house and has gone to about three o'clock in the morning so how do you educate one kid when the other kids feel it's not fair this is to me uh the toughest thing to do as a parent so I'd like to hear what you guys have to say about that because I have no clue well there is there is this running joke that the oldest child has dealt with the most severely as you said and then as we get more gray hair we get we get more fatigue decently we're tired of running and we we as parents start to slow down and be more permissive with our children as time goes on we have to check ourselves you know with age not only becomes you know we become not as necessarily as physically active but we're supposed to become wiser as well um one of the things that's so important is to learn from older people how to use the power of our speech to be persuasive to our children um younger parents who are inexperienced might Resort too readily to a little potion that took us using some corporal punishment and an older parent can sometimes have the wisdom to know that the right words and the right inflection placed at the right time can actually accomplish more than any kind of physical patch that we might give our children your point yeah so let's say you're 15 year old you let your 15 year old go to a co-ed Camp let's say that's not your Vibe at the home but that's what this kid needs or you let your 15 year old have no curfew and your 13 year old and your 17 year old are aghast and they're like why can't we do that well if they're polishing to do it then maybe there's something to discuss with them usually what happens is that each child at least that's my experience is on a different place religiously you know one child may be really a masmid and is really getting into the learning and you say it's not got nothing to do with co-ed or not co-ed but I want you to go to a camp where there's going to be learning a couple of hours every day because that's what you can handle and you make that child feel privileged that they're going to a more serious kind of camp where they where they're learning more and and this child you know that's best for for that child if the child gives you a hard time I think that may be an indication that they're trying to test the waters to see how far you'll go but you can always turn that decision into something which demonstrates to the child that you have such respect for them in their abilities that that's why you've chosen that path for them there is something you can say to children and that is that when kids say why don't I get the same as somebody else you can say we don't give all children in this home the same we give each one what he or she needs Hashem deals with us that way he doesn't give us all the same he gives us each what we need it's easier when the older ones get the more privileges because then it's more logical as well but when an older one has a bedtime that's different than a younger one and they say well I don't have the same you say he or she is that age it's appropriate for them you get what you need when you be that old you'll get that too so the the ideology I think I scoffer behind it is not to say you all get the same but each one gets what they need it's a very cogent argument to young people you want to close on that look I'll add two thoughts number one you need to uh to Daven and say to Helen um in these situations in the sense that um I know it sounds somewhat cliche but these are really challenging questions and situations to be in and you could do all of that and um it could work wonderfully sometimes not sometimes it's worthwhile to seek advice from a professional from a therapist or from a rabbi or from someone who maybe has dealt with these types of situations there are certain instances in which a professional will tell you you know what you should be open and honest with your 13 or 11 year old and you should tell them that so and so is having certain challenges and as a result we're doing certain things and there are other situations where the professionals will say under no circumstance should you do that at all and they'll guide in different direction it's really hard to give instructions in a theoretical case but um these are some of the challenges that exist in parenting and I don't think it's any easy one okay thank God I have my wife take care of everything I did nothing okay so we're after the last question um and then we'll call it an evening um okay so I think that's something we all struggle with uh giving meaningful Yiddish guide competing with the noise and the thought pollution of the world it's like uh that is what we want we want our kids to love Hashem and love to our mitzos and they're competing against a lot so I have a crop can I write tests and everybody Graphics are closed I recently had a congregant come over to me and say you know one of the problems that I have in perhaps more of the the the the the the Orthodox rules that aren't so yeshivish is that you know no one's giving Musser I want someone to slap me across the face once in a while and tell me what I have to do uh and I said I think yeah so yeah he thought that maybe I was uh intimidated because of the politics of the board and I shouldn't give too much Musser I said believe me the show will be doing me a favor I can make Aliyah tomorrow I'd be a happy man the issue is that today's generation I speak only for what I'm observing in today's generation need a tremendous amount of love as Rabbi tits talked about in a prior generation with rep simcha and his parents there was there was one Derek it was a little there was austerity in the in the world not just in the Jewish world and there was one mahalak there was one way of of raising children in today's world where Society is so permissive and so permeated with the message of empowerment um we just have to reinforce how much we love our children I love you I love you I love you and that's why you have to do X and um making sure that our children know that they are loved and at the same time and that they and that we respect their great abilities that we hold them in very high regard and at the same time using that as the as the foundation for why they need to comply with certain things in their lives so that they will become the people they're destined to become I think that has to be the overarching message now for each parent and for each circumstance that's going to vary but that sort of basic structure is I think what our children need most uh two quick points I'd like to make one is before the Yiddish card needs to be integrated happy thriving kids you know the kids who are pushed on a Jewish level but they're not functional on a personal level everything goes eventually you can't build healthy Yiddish gods and learning on a frustrated and fractured personality so it and and when a child is struggling that's the dimension that needs to be addressed first when they're thriving happy wanting to go to school wanting to learn the Judaism will probably follow so that's very important to remember and second thing is that Judaism needs to be taught creatively so that when you're giving your Malaysia for example to boys who let's face it why should they be interested you know there's Sports out there there's glitzy glamorous stuff why should they be interested in old dusty you know hundreds and thousands of years of technical you know legal niceties when you're 13 it's not natural so the teacher needs to be creative you know riddles and cool things that they you know be bribe them if necessary what's wrong with little bribery you know prizes and um the other teacher has to have some you know cool challenges here's the question during the next class you'll find discover the answer to that there's a price for doing it yeah be creative you know to to engage them so if they are drawn by the media which are professionally engaging we need to be professionally engaging too and it's just not good enough to use the old dry you know religiosity you know it sounds trite and we just got to do better than that so you know it's a good time to plug Torah live my friends are amazing app yeah you know totally have good stuff yeah uh first of all it is an incredible cover to be with both of you and uh a big thank you to Beyond this uh distinguished panel it really is an honor um I would say three things first of all I agree so much or attached that it social emotional well-being mental Wellness mental health is Paramount and that has to be looked after first and foremost and I also agree incredibly that we need to make Judaism enticing for our kids I had a review of mine who once said and uh the idea was that you need to figure out a way to get to kids but I'm also a huge believer that we need to make it compelling I'm a big believer in shabbatons in Singing in dancing and adding to the experiential aspects to learning trying to have as many of those as possible kids have to enjoy it kids have to love it the love is obviously essential but don't forget me and as kids are engaged in these healthy activities and as we're able to provide healthy outlets for them that are Kosher and that are exciting they're going to get into it more right the you know you have to acculturate these positive actions as much as possible and frankly schools need to work with jewels and need to work with parents in that regard I'll share just one last anecdote I had a parent in my office a few weeks ago who was complaining a little bit about the fact that uh her son doesn't go to uh to minion uh on you know days when there's a vacation days where there's no school and I know where we know each other a member of your show but that's okay but I I said no no I said to her I said listen I said we both know that your husband doesn't go to Minyan I said it's not a secret we know that and she says to me yes Rabbi but that's why I sent him to archaim that's the reason I sent him to Yeshiva because I wanted him to go to Minya and I said listen I wish we could do that all the time I wish we could solve for that it's just not that simple so you have all of these pieces that come together and ultimately that's what you have to do to sort of overcome a little bit a small piece of the noise and then you need a lot of muscle you need a lot of muzzle throughout because ultimately that uh that's an essential part of it but your message though is is that parents should not think that the Yeshiva is the Panacea is the Magic Bullet that's going to cure everything we are partners with our parents our the schools and the shules are partners and if any one of those parties is not willing to be an active partner it's not going to work schools are not spiritual hospitals just doesn't work that way right you know they play a key role a key component but how the value would be that simple right I want to end off with the I I was the Guild of a game show host so we're going to end off with just a question sort of answer the question because the world is great Hashem loves us Hashem loves the Jewish people so I'm going to start off a sentence and then I'm going to Easter the three rabbis finish the sentence and no this has not been pre-planned so they're actually very nervous right now they're like Robbie putting me on the spot okay okay so we're gonna rub my tat Robert kravkin and Rabbi Greer okay we're gonna end off with this teenagers are amazing because Rabbi tats because they're fresh in the world because they're discovering themselves and finding out what it means to be an adult because they push us all to be great people and to up our game in order to be able to figure out how to help them to succeed and how to help them to become incredible adults amazing thank you so much for joining us amudim please support a great organization helping really everyone and you don't really know about it because they do it privately so thank you so much for joining us and everyone should have a great evening thank you thank you thank you thank you [Music] foreign [Music] this place is very special to me it always makes me feel at peace it gives me time to think about how lucky I am [Music] my favorite part of the day saying good morning to my children I always try to show them that they're my whole world mornings can be a bit crazy [Music] and they are not the only ones who need to get going [Music] I love being a mom which is why my job makes a lot of sense the parents always tell me their kids love my daycare center and can't wait to get here every day I'm lucky I get to do something I love of course after a day with all these kids it's always nice to have some grown-up time [Music] I'm lucky to have such good friends [Music] but there's nothing like coming home to my family dinner is always a lot of work but we're lucky to be able to spend time with each other I would do anything to keep my children safe and happy I'm lucky to be with someone who works hard to take care of our family [Music] have the life I have so why do I hate myself so much [Music] I stand on my roof at night when my mind is racing and I can't sleep and the thoughts won't leave which means I'm out here every night I feel like my life has no meaning the pain is unbearable come out here before anyone is awake to decide if there should be a tomorrow and I know that if there is the pain and the sadness and the anxiety will all start again [Music] I hug my kids in the morning but I feel like I'm falling apart [Music] I'm surrounded by a family but I feel so incredibly alone [Music] people about a year ago it got really bad my husband dragged me to a doctor they wanted me to go into therapy and maybe start taking some medication but I refused how can a pill help the pain go away will that help my insecurities my financial troubles my depression [Music] this is just me this is what I've become [Music] I'm surrounded by Joy and I just want to cry all the time [Music] I know an attack is just around the corner and I always ask myself during the really bad ones is it really worth living through my friends have their own lives their own families why should I burden them I found a way to relieve the panic when it gets really bad sometimes I just need to feel something [Music] the relief doesn't last long foreign and think about hooking my long shawl over it [Music] I see a lot of things as a way out [Music] it's easier to just smile and pretend everything is fine but at least when the battle is over the choice will have been all mine [Music] I love my kids so much but I think sometimes they'd be better off with someone less sick my husband and I barely talk and when we do it's like this he thinks I should get over it and I can't blame him someone who doesn't experience The Emptiness the deep sadness the fear will never understand it as I'm sitting I feel like I'm crawling in my own skin I want to cry and scream help me somebody please understand my pain can't how I dread the hour of 4 AM my pounding heart sweating the fear the panic so afraid I can't get through another day feeling this way I'm lost and scared [Music] but I'm not ready to give up I pushed past the pain and I made the first call [Music] I'm on my way to getting the proper help that I need I need to realize that there is hope that I do have value and that my life is worth living foreign Goodman I am so glad to be able to spend time with everybody today and also introduce you to my dear friend Eddie Curry I remember one story in practice uh when I was playing for Coach David Blatt who ended up coaching the Cleveland Cavaliers in the NBA he one time shouted out in basketball he said basketball is 90 mental 10 physical so uh coming from the basketball space we focus a lot on on mental toughness and mental health and we're so grateful today that we could learn from from a very very special person and player Eddie Curry um Eddie uh and Patrice his his dear wife were in Israel this summer and we got to spend some great time and to get really close um and um so Eddie you know amadim is uh is an unbelievable organization that works Around the Clock serving thousands of people uh helping them with any mental health challenges that that they make May encounter um regardless of who they are what time of day it is they're always there for them so uh thank you for your time and uh hopefully being able to to share your expertise and knowledge with with people that we could all gain from it so um thank you so much Eddie we're glad to have you no thanks for having me um what an incredible cause just an incredible uh platform that that you guys have um I've never heard of anything so so like so good honestly uh you know you you see uh little blurbs here and there when you watch the TV or when you when you're looking at something on social media that they think might trigger something and they're like okay if you have a problem you know dial this number um but I think what you guys are doing is much more just active and much more just just being able to reach out to someone 24 7 man and and just uh no matter who you are and what you got going on man I think that that's that's so crucial because I mean mental health doesn't come with like a schedule you never know when when when something might grab you and something might just take over your mind and things might get kind of dark for you so I think that the fact that you guys are always available the fact that this type of um engagement is able to to take place man I think that that's incredible and I I'm just proud and happy to be a part of it uh thank you so much and we're glad to be able to spend some time with you you know Eddie it's it's almost impossible to make it to the NBA it's like less than one percent of the people in the world and um you have had such an incredible journey uh can we start off where you share a little bit about you know your early days of basketball and maybe some of the mental challenges that that you may have to go through at such a young age because already in high school you were world famous everybody you know I remember going to Envy NBA camp and and everybody there was talking about you and just at such a young age um maybe talk to us a little bit about your basketball background and and early on like mentally how hard was that you know going from high school straight to the NBA yeah uh for me I think uh going from high school to the NBA I think around the time NBA Camp happened um I think a lot of the hard stuff the mental stuff kind of was already I was so focused on basketball I really wasn't even paying attention to the mental part I think all of the mental stuff happened before that and then while I was in the NBA um during that brief time that you saw me I was kind of on cruise control and I was kind of caught up in the I want to be the best and I want to do this and do that and I had started I started to actually see the fruits of my labor I started to see you know um a payoff from carrying my basketball around as a kid everywhere I went um choosing to not join the gang when all the gang members were were getting together and doing knucklehead stuff I started to see the payoff of you know missing birthdays and missing certain holidays because I got basketball tournaments and this and that um but as a as a child I didn't understand that you know I'm as a kid you think instant gratification you think hey my birthday is coming up I get a gift Christmas is here I get a gift um if I do good Mom can I get some shoes um I didn't have those type of parents where I you know I I had the best of everything I was always taller than everybody so now I was a super tall kid at school I didn't have good clothes didn't have good shoes and I went to I went to a school I lived in the neighborhood where those type of things matter to the kids that were around you would get labeled as being a bum or being being labeled as being just an uncool person because you didn't have what everyone else had so on top of not having everything that everyone had I mean I would go to school so I would just try to disappear so much so that I found myself walking like almost hunched over I was trying to be the same size as everybody else and I'm head and shoulders above everyone you know by fifth or sixth grade I was taller than all the teachers I was talking to all the students and I'm the biggest kid in school and I'm walking like a hunchback because I really don't want to stand out um to the point where even when you know by the time seventh grade sixth seventh grade rolled around I got to Middle School um I didn't even want to play basketball I'm like no it's too it's just too much it was too much for me and and thank God I had the kind of parents that were like no you're going to play basketball you know you're going to find something to do because they saw of course they didn't look at it as like uh oh this is gonna get you to the NBA because like you said man that's like so far fetched that's so far out of like that's like okay I'm gonna go play the lottery one time and hit the lottery it's like that and it's like for them for my parents it was more so just I want you to start feeling like normal I want you to walk around and be able to you know hold your shoulders hold your hold your head high because you're around other tall people and you start to see that it's not just you out here and you can be in an environment that that people actually um um praise you so I think that's where it all started for me I think my parents did a great job at paying attention to like kind of my feelings and what was going on when it came to just my self-esteem um they knew that they couldn't do a lot for me in terms of Mom I just I just want this new this or that but when it came to I guess just having a pulse on my feelings and emotions for the most part um my parents were were were really you know spot on with it now they had their own issues my you know my my dad and my mom you know they would go back and forth they were fighting arguing things like that um but in terms of yes me I think they did all they could to make sure that myself and my sister mentally you know were in a good place and and I always appreciated them for that because um man I understand uh growing up as I got older I realized you know where I was from a lot of kids didn't have two parents in the household you know so both my parents come in the parent-teacher conference or both my parents come into the game like that was a foreign thing most times you only saw the single mother or you only saw a dad you know it was it was it was pretty cool and it was pretty impact impactful for me to have both my parents so much so that when I look at it today um that's been my main focus throughout everything is keeping my family together as I went through my trials and tribulations as I've done you know as I as I've done like uh you know self-destructive things in my relationship um things that would have ruined other relationships that's why I'm so close to my wife now because I realized she could have been gone man and I and everything that was so crucial and pivotal to me growing up I could have taken that away from my kids and so I always praise her and I thank her for that but um but yeah man I mean we can we can definitely get into it I mean there's a lot of you know being a kid man it's tough because a lot of times you spend you spend your time just like want people to take your pain serious and I think a lot of times what I find with my own children is everything they're going through listen I I I believe you I believe you are feeling that but let me tell let me try to let me try to help you work through it let me try to tell you what you can do to kind of manage what you what you got going on and kind of dictate try to put you in a place to where you don't have to keep you know going through this through this because some of what you're going through is self-inflicted and as a child they don't know that they don't realize that by them choosing today to not do a project that's due two weeks ago uh two weeks later that you know 11 12 days from now you're going to be hit with some of the craziest pressure that you've ever felt because now you got a dirty room because you haven't been cleaning your room you haven't done your project and now you got to cram and do this project you slipping behind in other classes and and you trying to still put on this facade to us the parents has like everything is okay and I'm on top of everything and and and as a kid who put everything off in school I could tell you like that's some of the worst anxiety I've ever felt going to school knowing that I haven't like studied for a test knowing that I haven't done a project waking up that morning like that's that's crazy now you add that to all the other things that we have going on today with social media and just and how important images to kids and I it's it's compounded and it makes it even crazier so um at this point I I've always been the person uh even I talked to my wife about it like look we got to take we got to take them serious if they said it hurting we gotta we gotta believe them because they're hurting they are hurting now if we look at that problem and compare it to us that it's not like the problems we have where it's like okay how are we gonna pay these bills how are we gonna do this how we gonna do that but believe me it's still affecting them the same way they still feeling the same anxiety they're still feeling the same things and I think that a lot of kids man like I said they don't have those type of parents that understand that what they're dealing with is a real thing it's a real pain it's a real uh uncomfortable feeling and a lot of times kids try to unfortunately take the easy way out and say you know what I'll do I'll do harm to myself or I'll do enough things to where maybe I'll do this and they'll see that that I'm for real they'll see that I'm I'm really feeling something and that's just what I try to avoid with my kids and luckily for for me like I said I had basketball things did start getting better for me in basketball as I saw the more forward in basketball the more positive things happen I started getting free shoes I started getting free Nike gear I started being able to dress a lot better and honestly at that point I didn't even care about dress no more because I was so good at basketball it didn't matter what I wore it was like you know you I just it was different it was a certain confidence that basketball that that Sports gave me that I didn't need the the physical things I already had the physical gifts I didn't need the clothes to go with it yeah and yeah you're you know your heart is one of a kind and the compassion you share for for your kids and your family is just so so amazing and I'm always just so so amazed by by your generosity and your care and you know we've also spent some time you know for Eddie's like for those of you watching he's like seven foot well he's over seven feet seven foot one and you know it is you know people don't realize it but it is very harmful it's like everywhere we go together everyone always comments not on you as a person or your feelings or your emotions they just comment on your height right away they could have negative reactions or different facial reactions when they see you and you know it's it's very um it is not always so welcoming and you know you mentioned as a kid you were purposely hunching over and so how did you gather yourself at such a young age to say like I'm gonna stop punching over and pick myself up and and pursue basketball you know like how did you get that strength was it Inner Strength you mentioned your parents did you meet a good coach did you just start feeling good on the court like like how can what what advice can you share for someone that might be going through something similar where they have a hidden blessing but they feel a little stuck where there's other circumstances that may be holding them back from pursuing it you know how how can they how can they jump over that fence um for me I surrounded myself with like-minded people um I surrounded myself with the basketball crowd I surrounded myself with kids that were trying to do the same thing I was doing they wanted to try to find a gym they wanted to try to find a hoop um I met I became all my friends were basketball players I didn't I didn't gravitate toward the the other crowd because I'm like that's not what I'm trying to do I was I was focused um it started like I said my mom and my dad definitely uh appointed me at basketball they're like look okay cool um you tall your middle school has a basketball team you know let's do that um and then my my my a lot of my basketball friends when school started it was like it became like okay let's everybody we're gonna try out for the team and we're gonna try and make the team and we're gonna try to you know keep this team together from now and all the way through high school and then we're gonna all go to the league together so it became like a group mentality almost like everyone just kind of had the same goal everyone had the same goal to try to to try to make it but it began with like I said my parents pointing Me In One Direction and also just having like-minded friends um of course the the fast life seemed more attractive to me at the time they had a little money and they had that family feel to them um I didn't spend a lot of time with my parents growing up because my mom worked 24 hours a day almost and my dad he drove trucks all across the country a lot of times it was just myself and my sister um but my dad was always really my dad and my dad's side of the family like his mom my grandmother they were really religious um everything was uh church I took a lot of time in church spent a lot of time in Sunday school spent a lot of time praying my mom only really listened to uh gospel music and so we had a very like I mean I had a I had a really good mix I think of religion and real life and um also like I said my mom and dad were always there for me when I needed them and they paid close attention to how I was feeling um I can't say that enough because I do I do real I do think that if you don't have that person something like what you guys have would have been great for me you know if I didn't have my parents or something like what you guys have would be great for some of my friends who got who got lost along the way who fell who fell between the who fell you know and the cracks because I'm sure other people wanted to do what I did other people wanted to hide a basketball friends but some of that stuff some of the darkness some of the distractions is right in their house some of their parents were selling drugs some of their sisters and brothers were selling drugs and doing different things so it was it was it was closer to them and it was harder for them to avoid for me um you know I try to just stay on a straight path I knew what I wanted to do I didn't have any corruption in my house I was lucky man I was lucky I was blessed and I know for a fact that like God wanted me to pull me I know for a fact I couldn't have gotten through certain situations without God I guess there's no way around it there's just no way around it you know you look at even now when I look at how my life is playing out is I just know it's God because there's no way I couldn't have done this my parents couldn't have got me through once I once I left the house it was all on me everything that's happened since then I didn't I just been winging it man I just been winging it I've been praying a lot and I've been just trying to just stay in tune with just really just trying to do the right thing I just try to move with my heart I try to do what God would want me to do and um and I just pray a lot and I just hope that I'm doing the right things to make them happy oh yeah you definitely are and um you know that was two great pieces of advice number one uh for everyone who's listening that may be struggling surround yourself with greatness you know listen you know even if even if you can't not everyone could be around greatness like Eddie was saying like he was found a group of players that were all you know dream chasing and they were positive and trying to find the gym and find you know maybe not everyone could get that opportunity but surround yourself by greatness could also mean you know listen to positive things listen to positive podcasts lessons of positive people that are successful um listen to positive music you know learn from people that are successful you know just surround yourself put yourself in a situation as much as possible to be around as much greatness as possible that was that was such a great piece of advice and the other piece of advice is Faith you know having a strong relationship with God could definitely help us overcome and and jump over that bridge like we were talking about earlier people often ask how we move on after hearing a tragic story or just a gut-wrenching abuse case and the details of a family that's literally falling apart at the seams due to addiction or some other type of Mental Health crisis and how do we move on from that the simple answer is how do we not sadly unfortunately the reality is that there are far too many suffering from these types of challenges and those that are suffering Are Not Alone so when we hang up the phone or finish a meeting with one we have no other choice but to help the next one because why should one get help in the next night [Music] so you know you're lucky enough to have an unbelievable High School career legendary High School career in a legendary area against an unbelievable talent and then you know can you talk to us a little bit about draft night you know what it was like when they called your name and you got to shake the commissioner's hand and what what training camp was like yeah uh okay so draft night man I ain't gonna lie well draft night was like uh by the time the draft came I was so caught up in the I want to be the best and I'm number one I'm the number one player because like this was before this was before uh you know the internet and things like that so I never met like the other top 10 or whatever players I would see him in Camp but by the time I would go to Camp I would already know who was who and my my people that were around me would be like okay that's what they're saying is number one that's who they're saying is the best guard that's who they're saying is okay now I know this now I know who I gotta dominate right so I kept that once I once I had that competitive like fire in me and I'm like I want to be the best quite naturally The Next Step was to try to be the number one pick right so I'm like I got to be the number one pick at the time I didn't really care to be the number one pick because I'm like I wanted to be the number one pick but if I wasn't I wasn't going to be mad because I didn't necessarily want to go play for MJ I had a I had a good friendship with MJ at the time I had known Michael Jordan since like I don't know maybe like uh my sophomore year in High School freshman year in high school I've known Michael Jordan um but so I didn't I knew his personality didn't quite like I didn't like how he talked to me at times I'm like if I played as a teammate of Michael Jordan and I knew how he treated the other like I just knew I mean you guys saw the documentary probably so imagine how he would have talked to a 17 18 year old kid like come on man so I I was like you know if I go there that'd be great uh because I get to be a number one pick out of high school like that would be incredible but if I don't I really wanted to go to the clippers because I was very I was friends with with Darius and I was friends with q and I'm like those are my brothers man I played AAU with them I love the youth and the exuberance that they played with the fire the passion like it almost was like when you watch their games you didn't care if they won or lost it was just