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Amudim - Unite To Heal 3
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We need your help. Join us as we Unite to Heal for Amudim on December 19-20, 2021. 36 hours of entertainment and meaningful content to raise awareness and necessary fundraising. Visit https://unitetoheal.com for more information #unitetoheal
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Auto-generated transcript. Not time-synced to the video.
[Music]
uh hello everybody my name is Ay gari
and and uh I feel privileged and honored
to
participate in this unite to heal event
for
amudim I am here with my brother I'm in
New York I'm here with my brother mul
gari Rabbi m gari in Australia first
little something about me and why I'm
here and then we'll talk about my
brother just a little bit um
unfortunately we tragically lost our
daughter a year ago on December 22nd
Zion Tavis and uh she had uh she
struggled with um an eating disorder and
depression and unfortunately she took
her life a year ago she was 24 years old
her name is
y and uh as a result of that experience
even before that since my daughter was
so public about uh her struggles uh we
were public as well our family and uh
after her passing uh things intensified
where I took on more of a activist role
if you you if you want uh in the field
of mental health so here we are talking
to my brother RAB m gari in Sydney
Australia uh my brother mul is the
founder and director of Bina Bina in
Sydney Australia which is a large
organization dedicated to adult Jewish
Education he was born in South Africa as
I was and educated in the US and
Australia he is a passionate educator
and speaker he lectures on a wide range
of topics with a special emphas on
personal growth and
self-development from a Jewish tourist
perspective uh M can you tell us
anything else about you that uh kind of
work you're involved in anything that I
left out background about yourself and
your work in
Australia well thank you first of all
it's great to be interviewed by my own
brother and I just want to acknowledge
that the work that you've been doing
over the last year and the context of
your own painful Journey but with
tremendous strength and also want to
just
say that it's just an honor to be part
of the amudim event and the organization
and thank them for inviting me to be
part of this so yeah B started about 25
years ago and its main purpose was to um
provide Jewish Education for the very
broad spectrum of the Jewish Community
here in Sydney but we've developed a
stream over the years focusing
specifically on personal growth
character development which has evolved
in so many different ways raising
awareness um to do with issues to do
with parenting and also helping people
and
educating people in the area of mental
health and supporting them through their
Journey which I suppose is what brings
us here
today all right thank you so let's get
right into it um amudim is an
organization that focuses on responding
to a whole wide range of mental health
issues what is your involvement in the
area of mental health are you just a
Rabbi just a Rabbi that helps out or are
you a qualified counselor or
therapist okay so I'm definitely not a
qualified therapist I'm not a counselor
I am just a Rabbi um a rabbi that enjoys
and is involved and has read extensively
on psychological issues but I I
understand my role and my role is just
is just a Rabbi but I do help many many
people in a counseling capacity from a
rabbi perspective uh never pretend to be
a substitute for any critical and
necessary intervention
but helping people through their journey
I believe that there's a puzzle and the
puzzle has a number of different pieces
to it um therapists parents medical
professionals and so on and so forth but
that puzzle I think needs to include a a
RV a mashia a mentor however you want to
describe it someone that's there to help
and support people with a Torah
perspective um and a Torah Outlook which
I think is very very critical and I want
to just say I suppose in our discussion
now I'm going to share things from my
perspective and my experience here in
Sydney um I suspect that it's not very
different around the world but I'm not
that familiar what happens other places
but I I can share a little bit of my
experience here working with people over
the last 20 25
years thank you uh next question so
focusing specifically on your on your
bck role what is the role of a rabbi in
a mental health crisis or Challenge and
how does that go together with regular
therapy or other interventions and I
want to just add to that um because it
seems to be some kind of confusion in
the fir world uh who does one go to
First do you go to your Rabbi first do
you go to a psychologist first you're a
psychiatrist what is the role of the
rabbi where does it start where does it
stop let's talk about that just a little
bit that's a great question
so very often actually people do come to
the rabbi first and that's my that's my
experience particularly with people who
I have a relationship
with sorry do you think that's a good
thing where should they go you tell me
what they do actually do but where
should they go first so I'm I'm not sure
I'm just I'm just dealing with with with
the reality and the fact is that
sometimes they feel supported I think
the field Rabbi is someone they can
they're familiar with they comfortable
with they feel safe with perhaps if they
already have a relationship or they know
someone that has a relationship with me
for example and therefore they will very
often often come sometimes not expecting
that I will actually direct them
somewhere else but um I will say
sometimes people come to Rabbi thinking
the rabbi is the last stop and they will
be able to provide the solution which
isn't which isn't the case they could
certainly help they can be part of the
journey but they won't be able to
provide the solution um so let's just
break it down a little bit if that's a
okay so I think it's fair to say mental
health is very very complex with so many
different components that work together
affecting each other and of of course
every case is different now we know that
sometimes there are purely physiological
imbalance issues that require medical
intervention sometimes there's deep
emotional issues which require
particular expertise particular
qualifications professionals and also
something that can be ongoing I don't I
don't even even in a rabbi counseling
position I I'll stay with a person
throughout the journey but I don't off I
don't often I don't offer I should say
um ongoing counseling and nor as any R I
think
but nevertheless I think a Rob or a
mentor mashia can be incredible helpful
incredibly helpful on a number of levels
so let me just give you a couple of
examples first of
all sometimes it's the authority that
that that helps I'll give you an example
just now I'm dealing with a family who
clearly needs to go for grief counseling
grief counseling that I cannot provide I
don't have the expertise it needs to be
someone that really is good and and it's
a really serious situation but I now
through a friend and and through this
discussion they've agreed to go but only
if they speak to me first and I will
support them going to
that form of form of of therapy so I'll
I'll be in that position to direct them
in the right direction right uh another
example of where the rabbi comes in to
the team and he's part of the journey is
guidance sometimes you need to assure a
family or a patient um where it's okay
to be Mel okay to be lenient okay to do
different things it might be uh yum ker
with eating disorders it might be not
doing certain Mitzvah when it comes to
disorders right sorry needing disorders
as well needing disorders when exactly
um it might be um not doing certain
mitzah when it comes to
Obsession OCD for example and and part
of that direction is not just giving
theak but it's also supporting him and
removing the guilt and removing the
uh the uncertainty about you know what
what'll happen if I do this and and and
and is are you sure it's okay and things
like that and sometimes the therapists
are not able to do that because they
don't have theic or Spiritual Authority
where they of can
um I think also most importantly
probably is that
the the rabbi needs to needs to create a
partnership I think a partnership with
the therapist the parents a partnership
with the rest of the team and that
partnership affects many different areas
for example culture right often
especially here in we don't have a lot
of religious therapists for example
often therapist doesn't understand the
culture of the family doesn't understand
the values of the family um just
recently I dealt with a case to give you
an example which for me it was clear
that it was an against Torah values
where someone was having um someone
who's married having problems with their
parents you know realizing that the
parents sort of didn't provide the right
positive parenting that they would have
wished for and so on and so forth and
there was tension and conflict and the
therapists very much in line with a lot
of modern society sort of perspective
was guiding the this particular woman on
breaking off ties with her parents or
putting very strict conditions with with
with her mother and and if they don't
keep those conditions coming around come
come completely which I'm completely
convinced that that's against Terra it's
against her values and it's and it's
completely unhealthy and you them and I
tell them and I will tell them and I
will continue to tell them that I think
that now there can be boundaries there
can be modified relationship and so on
and so forth depending on the case but
it's not healthy for them and it's not
healthy for their own children and and
sometimes what will happen is that their
own children will respond to them the
way they're responding to their parents
and and therefore that's kind of the
cultural or religious perspective that
the rabbi can bring to the team if
they're working together with the
therapist with or with the counselor um
the role of the rabbi also is O General
overw overall sorry overall overall
well-being um including just bringing in
a ristic a spiritual component to the to
to the the whole journey you seem to be
describing a utopian
process the way it should be what the
what the uh contribution of the rabbi is
and the contribution of the therapist
what if there's resistance what if the
patient
decides um either you right and they
wrong both both of these scenarios are
not good scenarios so for example
they'll they'll only take your advice as
opposed to the therapist or they'll say
to you the therapist is right and you
wrong uh is there a point where you kind
of get off the bus and you say I no
longer take
responsibility retically uh in this case
and we have to part where at this point
yeah sometimes so what so what I will
often do is if I really feel that a
person needs the assistance and the
support of a
professional I will be very clear that
my role is limited and I'm not prepared
I mean I'm always prepared to talk to a
person I'm always prepared to be nice to
a person and support them but I'll be
very clear about the support that I can
and cannot give and if I think it's
particularly in cases where it's
physically or emotionally or
psychologically dangerous I'll be very
clear either to the person or their
family that my responsibility ends
because I'm not prepared to support
through a process if the team isn't
complete and what I will often encourage
people to do is to actually give
permission to a professional to talk to
me so that it can actually create a team
and I've often had discussions with with
therapists on on the phone about a
particular case with permission of
course because that's the laws and so on
but um we're we're creating that team
and respect mutual respect for each
other becomes very
beneficial so just to give you like
another example of a ro I think you know
sometimes it's very important for a also
to
add together with the Journey of therapy
or professional intervention that sort
of ristic meaningful aspect as a support
and to get advice by the way the the
relationship is mutual it's not only I
tell the therapists what the culture is
they tell me also what is what is
beneficial and what isn't beneficial
right so that I know the limitations of
my role but having said that so just to
share with you AO often what happens is
people let go of toxic stuff or they let
go of stuff that they've been involved
in but then what they create a vacuum
and that vacuum could attract other
negative things so there has to be that
sort of synthesis there has to be that
combination and often the role of the r
is to the role of the therapist is to
help the person let go of of toxicity
but what is it going to be filled with
what what's that void going to be filled
with and maybe sometimes that's the role
of the Rob and that that sort of
combination is very important you know
in the writings of the who wrote
extensively um in response to people who
sought advice for emotional turmoil or
anxiety or or other mental health issues
um and when it was mild would give
spiritual advice but very often in
letters Reb would uh advise people to
seek seek advice and seek intervention
Reb would always create this like
combination between three things one was
seeking professional advice and and
following the doctor's orders and
following the therapist orders and so on
and so forth the other was purely
spiritual support like checking a muuza
or increasing in kashus or whatever the
the case was and then often it was also
about studying and and engaging in in
meaningful meaningful things like prad
or strengthening or and things like that
so there's that partnership which we
find on many levels which is so
important thank
you um mental health illness and
challenges seem to be on their in the
last number of decades I can tell you
that uh I researched this after passed
away that the suicide rate is actually
you know
documented uh I think since 200 and and
four like last 16 15 16 years have gone
up about
60% in young adults mostly women um is
this just a fact of life can it be
slowed down or prevented in other words
is prevention even a possibility let me
just add to that that
um we have to treat mental health in its
acute and chronic
stages at the same time we have to
prevent the very kind of lifestyle
choices or Life Choices that people make
that may perhaps
bring uh to these uh you know present
with these problems uh you're correct
what you said earlier that there's also
a possibility of some chemical things
going on but let's say there's
environmental issues uh so what's more
important prevention or cure or
both uh and are we giving enough I I I
think that we're not giving enough
attention to
prevention uh in the very early stages
of life and we could even go before that
uh parenting before you even have a
child maybe you know someone should each
each couple should should go for
training and how to be a good parent so
let's speak about that a little bit so
yeah there's a lot of different aspects
of your question but I first of all I
have to agree with you I think
I think the world is
amazing um in response to crisis there
are so many different organizations
responding to crisis trying
to fix crisis trying to intervene into
crisis and so on and so forth and not
nearly enough or not nearly enough
thought or resources or thinking is
given to prevention
so I don't claim to be an expert but let
me tell you what I've discussed with
others and sort of my perspective on the
whole concept of prevention so first of
all just to Echo and just to emphasize
the point that you made that I
referenced
earlier I like to look at this as to
give an analogy of physical illness
right physical illness unfortunately for
ways that we don't
understand we don't always understand
the ways of Hashem can strike anything
anyone can die from a heart attack God
forbid anyone can die from cancer no
matter how fit or healthy they they
might be right however the does tell us
one should live in a healthy way because
we know that although it's not always
preventable although it's not always
possible and to prevent illness and
illness can strike any family any
environment any stage of a person's life
and so on and so forth but we do know
that living a healthy life minimizes
risk of of physical illness right um if
you live a healthy life you less you
know if you eat healthy or you do
exercise you're less likely to get a
heart attack simply simply put doesn't
guarantee but it's less likely so I
think the same is with mental illness I
think that as you say sometimes it's a
pure pure illness that could be genetic
it could be given by God in in whatever
way whatever form whatever context and
whatever you do in the best family the
best environment the best resource the
best education it will still strike but
having said that there are ways to live
healthy and there are ways definitely to
prevent and I think there's many things
happening in our society today that is
exacerbating and definitely contributing
to the increase of mental illness
anxiety depression and so many other
forms of illness one of the people who I
like listening to who I would consider
and I've spoken to many times or I
consider somewhat of a mentor and I hope
he doesn't mind me saying that is Dr
pelovitz and there's an expression that
he uses that I've used many times when
he talks about depression he talks about
depression with a small D or depression
with a big D um and I've kind of
extended that to anxiety like anxiety
with a small a oriet with a big a what
then means is with a big T tra with a
big T trauma with a small T exactly so
the difference between these things on
the small letters or big letters is that
depression with a big D or trauma with a
big T or or anxiety with a big a means
that it's it's bad enough and it's
clinical and it's really sort of out of
the control of the person and the person
needs support right it's not that a
person has a choice anymore so much they
have a choice to get help but they don't
have a choice to help themselves they
need other people to support their help
however very often the two get blurred a
little bit and very often every person I
would say or lots of people most people
go through stages of their life where
there's a least depression with a small
D or anxiety with a small a I mean we're
Jewish right we anxiety is part of our
DNA um we worry a lot and so on and so
forth or we suffer a little bit of
trauma or people looked at us the wrong
way and so on and so forth and I think
sometimes we lack the skill or our
children lack the skill to deal with the
stuff on the small D or the small a or
the small te and if we don't deal with
it properly what can happen is I think
it can evolve into the Big D and the big
a where it's a bit late already where it
needs a whole another response and a
whole another intervention and and and
then it's already a response to a crisis
so I think what we do need to do is we
do need to put a lot of effort and I
think particularly when our children are
young to build strong people right part
of that is building a healthy mind we
know that you know particularly a lot of
modern psychology a lot of positive
psychology for example is very much
based on the way the Mind interprets
what is happening around us um you know
cognitive behavior therapies based on
there a lot of therapies are based on
using the positivity of the mind or
using reframing or using the way we
interpret the mind to control the way we
feel so mental weakness or or mental
struggle often happens in the heart me
in other words it's more emotional than
cognitive but nevertheless it is driven
by cognition is driven by the way we
think now although this is very much a
part of modern positive psychology but
it's an old Torah concept uh the book of
tan for example is is completely based
on the simple principle
of that the brain rules the heart the
way we think will determine ultimately
or at least influence the way we feel
so I think we know that uh uh building a
strong mind is is so important I just
recently I I do a personal growth class
every Thursday and I do it in series of
six weeks and recently I just gave a
series based on a secular book called 13
things mentally strong people don't do
um and it's all about the mind it's all
about the perception it's all about your
perspective it's all about the way you
think about what people have done what
people have said the what the reason
things have happened the reason things
have happened to you the reason the way
you you respond to them and and so on
and so forth so I think prevention has a
lot to do with how we yes how we bring
up children really um with the proper
values the Torah values building strong
to put it in summary building strong
Minds building people who are Mally
strong to be able to deal with challenge
to emotion that comes later on will it
always help of course not but I think a
lot of it can be done which could then
definitely slow it down if it's done in
the right way with the right perspective
with the right
values so let's uh talk a couple of
examples uh because this might be easier
I would think on the surface to talk to
a teenager or a young adult you know
explain about and so on but there have
to be
subtle uh for instances in very young
children um four or five years old let's
talk about a couple of examples that are
not good as a
parent and conversely what is a positive
parenting
step okay so I think at every age of at
every stage of
parenting this will manifest itself in a
different way right
but I think we also know that the
formative years of a person is critical
that's when we shape the minds and the
perspectives of our children mod
education will tell us also that the
impact of children even before they born
has an effect on what will happen later
so I think we probably need to raise
awareness and talk more about how
parents are building the minds and the
hearts of children from a very very
young age in a Torah
context to summarize it I think we need
to help people or raise awareness with
people and give them the ability as
parents and as Educators not just
parents but teachers as well to
build let me just summarize this I think
to build strong healthy resilient
children who will pursue meaning and
purpose in their life right
now let's just summarize how that
happens I think I mean there's not one
answer for every question but this is
the way I like to look at it um there
are two things that will do this as
parents and as Educators right and these
two things unfortunately people often
view as being two opposite Concepts and
or mutually exclusive and they're not
they're actually critically important to
be and to work
together um and I'm going to use a sort
of a cabalistic formula um which which
talks about the the the primary emotions
of a person and I'm going to use two
words which are need to clarify and
explain the two words are and which are
often misunder mistranslated as kindness
and or or which is which is often
translated as harshness or or severity
which is not true what I mean
by is is the whole concept of love and
acceptance where G is the concept of
firmness or assertiveness right so the
truth sorry or accountability or
accountability right so the truth is
this these two concepts are actually
critical in all relationships right even
even in marriage for example right we
know that love is the glue of
relationships but respect which often
actually is a gur idea which means it's
holding back giving the person space
creating boundaries what is okay to say
what is not okay to say which much more
of a gur thing
is is also important that that's a gur
concept and that's important all
relationships but when it comes to
Parenting however you know I always say
that
parenting and it's important for parents
to understand this when you start
parenting it's actually not just about
your children it's about a new critical
stage in your own personal growth
because when you parent you suddenly
realize or perhaps or you should realize
or hopefully will realize that parenting
needs parents to have two opposite
emotional approaches working at the same
time right which is difficult because
most people have a disposition to one or
the other so what I mean by that in
summary is the following so first of all
there's got to be and working together
what I mean mean by that briefly is this
means if you want to build strong
children they need to grow up in a safe
environment they need to grow up in a
loving environment so there's got to be
unconditional love unconditional love
means whatever your child is going to do
or be or say he or she remains your
child it is your child that you have to
just accept and love whatever happens
you need to express that love we need to
create a positive environment of of
warmth of of calmness of Happiness of
fun even we need to nurture the
relationships with our children we need
to accept the individuality of our
children right that's the that that that
will build each child in the own
way every child is different we get to
decide the values but they are each
different from each other and we'll
Express those values a bit differently
um we need to build communication we
need to build tolerance it needs to be
open communication at the same time we
need to give children the safety of
having boundaries
predictability um artic culated
boundaries sometimes firmness sometimes
even consequence all done in the context
of warmth and respect and positivity but
parents need to be able to parents to
build strong to build strong children we
know that if one of those two things are
missing the parenting model falls apart
the children do not feel safe I often
tell parents the the children that find
it that challenge the discipline the
most are the one that actually craving
for it children want structure children
children want Direction children want
values they just don't know how to
articulate it they challenge it they
they test it but they do want that right
so those two concepts has to be that's
as a foundation now what that does what
that leads to what that needs to lead to
is that has to be the vehicle that has
to be the formula through which we teach
values to our children I'm talking about
particularly teror values many of
which unfortunately go against modern
Trends I'll give you a couple of
examples right give an example for for a
child that's years old that's a great
question a child that's four years old
so we live today in a very me world
right use the uh a beautiful expression
from Rabbi sex that we've mooved the
society has moved away from we to me
right and he says we have to reverse
that um what Society has done is given
people an amazing sense of entitlement
we have we live in a generation of
entitlement as we say in yish Al right
that's that's the perspective now we
need to give and showered our children
with many things and love but the way we
get rid of that sense of entit
entitlement which is evil and bad and
selfish
and for sure and
ultimately builds tremendous weakness
and and and and unnecessary
vulnerability because then as soon as as
soon as I don't get what I want I fall
apart it starts from four years old it
starts from delay gratification it start
starts from boundaries it starts with in
a loving way it doesn't have to be in a
strict harsh spirit way but it starts
with training children that even are
four years old you don't need to get
whatever you want when you want right um
and so on and so forth so that's a great
example and that starts from a very very
young age it starts from certain
boundaries it starts from things again
not handled down in a harsh way but
there there certain things that are
acceptable and certain things that
aren't acceptable um things like control
talking about and again this also starts
from four years old maybe a child
doesn't understand it on that level but
as they get start to get older talking
about
the fact that we don't control
everything talking about and and
surrendering to AEM the things we say to
children at three or four years old has
an effect um as they get older training
them and this this is a big one we we
you know the we the me world that we
live in also breeds a lot of victimhood
I just want to share with you in
Australia at the moment there was just
recently a person passed away his name
was Eddie jaku a holocaust Survivor he
passed away um over a hundred
he wrote a book um I think when he was
100 already or close to it he wrote a
book called the happiest man on Earth he
had this thing where he gave himself he
crowned himself with the title of being
the happiest man on Earth and um he
wrote he wrote It's A Beautiful book and
and and it's worth reading it's not a
particularly Torah book but it's just
it's just it's just an amazing story
where he refused to walk he had gone
through the Holocaust the horrors of the
Holocaust and yet refused to hate refus
to blame refus to be a victim
essentially right he had every reason to
be a victim legitimate reason to be a
victim but nevertheless chose not to I I
want to come back to the
five-year-old please um because I think
these are all very
lofty uh academic Concepts but you know
as the reab said that uh rash is for B
MRA right that five- all can
understand um or the Rashi right what
Russia Russia Russ okay so these are all
you know technical things that all make
a lot of sense but how do you for
example if you want to say no to a
5-year-old how can you say it in such a
way that the 5-year-old will understand
that it's for their own well-being and
uh not because that not because the
parent wants control but rather I'm
saying no for your own wellbeing because
I love you because I want you to be a
good person how would a 5-year-old
understand that I want this candy no you
can't have it and here's why explain to
a 5-year-old
so my view is that not always you have
to explain it's how you do it children
have a different way of communication
very young children maybe as they get
older and they ask you why it's good to
explain but I actually my parenting
theory is that you don't always have to
answer the question why but what you do
have to do is your language your body
language both your your explicit
language and the way of your demeanor
and this I'm coming back to the thing so
when you say no like when you want to
train a 5-year-old and we're using that
example right but it's about the broader
context of creating strength and
self-control and and and and you know
personal responsibility when you want to
explain to a child that not everything
you want now you have to get it's not
about explaining it's about saying no
you can't have it or or you could have
it later but it's the way you say it
it's if you say it with firmness and
with love the child picks up on it they
might cry they might even throw a
tantrum and that's fine as long as you
don't come down harsh as long as it
doesn't become about you as soon as a as
soon as a parent screams and shouts it's
about them it's not about the child now
we're not perfect we do that sometimes
we all make mistakes that's fine but I'm
talking about in theory right we we we
we should say no and we should be
parents and not be scared but we need to
do it with love it should be not about
us and not about what we want they're
not about because this is good for us
it's about the well-being of the child
and children have amazing antennas even
very young children who can't speak or
can't understand long explanations they
can pick
up where it's coming from then they
might always not smile and say yeah
you're fantastic I know you mean my my
well-being so of course I want have the
candy now no they might actually throw a
tantrum but doesn't matter it's a
long-term effect as long as you as long
as it's coming from the right place as
long it's coming from your love I think
this is the issue you see sometimes
people parents know that they have to
love and love and love and the way they
understand that is that means I never
say no I can't say no I can't be firm
that's what I'm talking about other
words that doesn't breed strong children
that breeds entitled children right so
so that's why that combin ation is so
important it's so
critical thank you that's well well
answered thank you very much let's move
on to a hot button hot button
topic and uh because it's a hot button
topic and uh I've read a lot about it
and I've spoken to a lot of people
struggle with it and thought about it a
lot so you're going to forgive me if the
uh the question is a little bit
long-winded and this is the area of
Technology um so here's my uh here's my
rant um the the rabbit didn't like the
uh concept of labels you know when it
com when it comes to Jews you know
reform Orthodox this and that and the
other for for purposes of this
discussion I'm going to use labels and
I'm going to divide the Orthodox world
into the ultra Orthodox and the modern
Orthodox and it's my contention that the
ultra Orthodox world has done themselves
and more importantly the modern North Ro
World a
disservice by um the way they have
presented the ills of the internet and
electronic
usage uh there was a a major Gathering
some years ago called the internet aser
and the discussion was really about OBS
obscenities OBS material violence and so
on you know the kind of material where
religious boy or girl should not have
access to and so
on and in truth the more I think about
it the Lost opportunity was that really
has nothing to do with that or less to
do with um being exposed to
inappropriate material but rather it has
to do with emotional
well-being um you know especially with
you know with girls and body image with
you know uh the amount of time spent on
on internet on electronics the lack of
connection I want to mention one of my
favorite books lost connections by Yan
hurry and uh uh and the result was that
they were kind of preaching to the choir
because within the alter Orthodox
uh group so those that were doing it
anyways they kind of listened and they
continued doing what they were supposed
to do the
rebels were W you know didn't listen in
on the modern Orthodox on the flip side
I know that even from the best best of
Educators in school they said oh that's
for the fmer that's for the uh but our
our students our children who are 13 14
years old everyone can handle a
smartphone
um uh successfully and in truth it was
not the case as I've observed uh in the
years since I've been observing this um
now although I've read a lot about some
studies about this although there's not
we talk about quation and correlation
there's
definitely uh a correlation between um
between the ills of the internet
electronic usage and mental health
um I don't think the studies are
conclusive about quation in other words
it's not like a a a uh a scientific
study that has been done that is can can
you know definitively say we have mental
health this is the reason internet
there's obviously other reasons but
whether the internet uh causes it we
know there's correlation that we do know
I'll I'll just end off this question by
tell by telling you that I was
interviewed for a for a documentary by a
British uh psychotherapist by the name
of Dr Raj
pord told me the following and this is a
both someone who's both a psychologist
and a psychiatrist who told me he used
the word dismiss that that young people
up until the age of 25 he told me are
unable to absorb that which is good from
the internet and to dismiss that which
is bad so I think uh this is uh we're in
the throws of this right now we don't
really kind of realize what uh what you
know the ills that is doing to ourselves
and to our young children as they as
they grow up both in terms of access to
inappropriate material um the lack of
human connection and all the other
things that go along with that so I
think I think uh psychologists talk
about this uh you know adium and uh uh
we can go on and on about that but let's
talk about this from a Torah perspective
SL mental health uh what role does it
play and what should we what is the
messaging about internet electronic
usage social media and so
on okay that's a that's a huge question
and I'm happy you bringing it up and I'm
happy we talking about it I've
personally um in the last number of
years particularly started to talk about
it a lot in my parenting
sessions and dealing with again from a
prevention
perspective um dealing with parents and
the usage of their children with
technology um
and I think you're right not I'm not
doing it so much from a obviously it
cont has a very big religious component
to it but it's not just a religious
component um it's much deeper than that
much broader than that um we have a
everyone lik talk about a pandemic today
but you know now there's a new strain of
the virus uh I'm in isolation now
because I came from South Africa last
week but uh there's a much bigger
pandemic and that is the pandemic of I
won't say technology but misuse of
technology technology essentially is a
good thing I can't really comment on the
communities in America um and each one
has their own hash and own ways of doing
things but the way I the way I see it
particularly dealing over here in
Australia i' talked about it here in
Sydney and in Melbourne
particularly is the horse is bolted I
mean 99.9% of families are all exposed
to technology it's not a matter of
should we have technology or not
everyone has it everyone's exposed to it
it's a matter now of managing it right
now before before I address this
question I want to just finish off the
last question because it's going to be
relevant to this question as
well anyone that really wants to take
seriously the strategies they use with
their children is going to have a going
to have to have a look at their own
modeling as well right I mean it's just
I mean I know it's a cliche but it's
critical you simply cannot teach values
unless you're prepared to make changes
in your own life right it's a simple as
simple as that and you know there's a a
v that I once saw about the Kim on the
on thees so the king we know had faces
of children right and the Orin was made
M was made out of one piece of gold
which had difficulty with and had to
show throw the or into fire and so on
but explained that the Kim itself also
was M also came from one piece of gold
and the lesson behind that is
that it's all one formula it's all one
Journey parents and children have to
become one journey and if parents want
to take this seriously the well-being of
their child the emotional well-being of
the child and the religious well-being
of the child and every other aspect of
well-being of the child we have to also
look at our
own consistency our own authenticity our
own mixed messages or Clarity of
messages and our own modeling and things
and our own behavior right which is true
in all the things you mentioned before
whether it's self-control or Indulgence
or materialism Pursuit of pleasure
whatever the casee might be but it's
also particularly relevant to the area
of technology and how it affects
children there's a lot of resistance to
con to confront this but the reality is
that there's as you know yourself and as
you've discovered over the last years
you shared that with me many times and I
know this from talking to lots of
different people there's terrible stuff
that is happening as a result of misuse
of tech technology um and it needs to be
addressed and the only way I think it
can be addressed
well I'm not talking about once the
crisis is there because obviously then
it's a different response but in terms
of prevention we need to start very very
young so let's just go through the the
issues very briefly obviously this is a
very long discussion but let's let's try
and go through the issues very briefly
and I'll share with you my perspective
and what I've been telling parents right
um the harm of technology is multiply
layered it's not even about
inappropriate material though it is
about inappropriate material obviously
it bring it brings a a
there's a lot of pornography a much
higher percentage there should be
pornography addiction within the
religious world that's a fact um some
people don't like to notice it but it's
there addiction to pornography is not a
religious issue it's a functional issue
people become dysfunctional from it
people come depressed mental health is
affected the whole relationships are are
are harmed because they have a whole
wared perception of what of what
intimacy is supposed to look like there
are so many different effects
of so many different effects of of of of
addiction or screen Addiction in general
but pornography addiction in
particular even if there's not even if
there's not addiction overuse of screen
is bad for people you know there are
studies out there that the the the
levels of empathy which empathy by the
way is a critical component of any
relationship has dropped dramatically
there there's a a documented study which
I saw one over Dr pel's books actually
which is which is an amazing study of
how levels of empathy has actually
dropped since smartphones have come into
being right because people have stopped
noticing other people they're on their
phones all the time they're on the
screen all the time they don't have
human interaction they don't communicate
properly they don't they're not aware of
what's going on around them they be they
become very absorbed in their own bubble
um warped realities of what things are
supposed to look like like social media
where you have distorted pictures and
photoshopped images and and and very
false images of what couples look like
and what Bliss looks like and what
happiness looks like where you know the
couples that come I mean it's an amazing
thing I mean I i' I use social media
because I use it for my organization
particularly and I've seen people post
things where I've canceled those people
I know what's going on behind closed
doors and they create this image of
being the most amazingly happy happy
people on on on on screen creating Envy
creating insecurity and it's just it's
just it's just unbelievable so there's
so so much harm and we very tempted
particular from a very young age to use
technology as a babysitter we put kidss
in front of a screen often it's it's
about because it's kosher it's okay it's
Uncle Moshi videos uh it's it's it's
this music it's that video excessive
screen time is bad for you it's it's
documented it's a terrible thing and
then as they get older then of course
becomes Much More Much More Much More
Much more
serious so I think again what I'm
sharing with you is not a but I just
think it's not spoken about enough
that's why I'm I'm passionately speaking
about it I think that the way to begin
is with two things parents number one
have to be parents and it's very
difficult sometimes because you're up
against a lot of social pressure
everyone every parent will will know
that the the fourth grader comes in and
says why can't I have a SM burn every
child in my class has one that's where
it begins and and from there just
evolves one thing leads to another so we
have to number one be parents and be
strong respectfully nicely positively
but be strong most but more importantly
is as children do become exposed to
technology which is inevitable in most
societies most PR societies even we need
to begin to have
conversations and those conversations
with our children have to be multiple
and often right and the conversations
have to what you're saying is conceding
that the it's here to stay to it but we
have to have conversations and those
conversations have to surround have to
focus in two areas one is they have
to be around the values that we hold
dear in other words children as they get
older they need to understand why it
could be very dangerous for them that's
that's that's important particularly as
they get a bit older you know I said
before their 5-year-olds don't need to
know the reason for everything but as
they get older nowadays particularly
maybe it is important to have those
conversations and to explain it even
though they might not understand it
properly but it's important to talk
about values when you transmit any
values really it's it's important to
talk about it and talk about it with
passion and talk about it repeatedly and
those conversations have to be around
guidelines and
boundaries so I think as soon as you
know as soon as you notice or even
before you notice even before you this
could be even after you notice that your
child is too exposed to or you know too
much on the phone or too much on on on
on the iPad or too much on the laptop
whatever the case is but maybe even more
importantly before that happens we need
to have conversations with our children
that go something like this they have to
be respectful calm conversations but but
assertive things like we need to
communicate things to children like I'm
responsible for your well-being right
things I ask you to do or I prevent you
from doing you don't always like but
it's for your well-being and I promise
you I will never do something that's not
in your interest right you need to
acknowledge the children that temptation
is normal right you know we it's a very
important thing kids grow up and they
have Temptation they have Temptation
look at things they shouldn't look at
they have temptation to engage in things
they shouldn't engage in and that needs
to be acknowledged and it's normal but
as a parent my job is to guide you and
my job is to ensure that you are
engaging in safe Behavior here right
um that takes time temp temptation is
normal and the desire to engage is
normal and the skill to engage
positively and responsibly is is is
important the analogy always give us a
car I'm not going to give you my car to
drive cars are very good things and they
can do amazing and they can accomplish
amazing things but when you're too young
you don't have a license because because
you're not responsible enough to drive
properly same thing with tech technology
technology is not bad it's a good thing
we know that today in the Torah world
the amount of Torah that is access ible
I mean I use it in my own organization
the amount of learning that that is done
online and through technology is amazing
but you have to have the skill to do it
and that comes with age and it comes
with maturity um so therefore you tell
the child this is the conversation we're
going to have and I want you to be part
of the conversation and I want you to
share your feelings but you need to know
that I'm the parent and I'm going to
make some of the decisions um and we're
going to make some changes if it's
already too you know if ready too much
we're going to make some changes or
we're going to set some guidelines now
part of that conversation has to be
about some of the
you know some of the some of the um bful
some of the weaknesses or some of the
dam dangers of Technology but then we
have to have conversations around
boundaries and they have to be
respectful um but they have to be
assertive we shouldn't be scared we have
to have conversations with empathy we
have to acknowledge the struggles and we
have to have interactive conversations
we have to listen to them as well we
have to listen to why they want you know
I want to tell you something like for
example over here and there's a big
problem where um some parents want to
limit the use of techn ology for their
children in a positive way and then
their their fifth grader will come and
say well I I don't know anything that's
going on in my class and sometimes
legitimate by the way because there's a
WhatsApp group in the class and they get
left out they they get completely left
out because they don't know what's going
on because that parent doesn't want them
to have WhatsApp which I think is
legitimate right so we'll talk about how
to deal with that but this is all in the
context of how we began this discussion
this is critical because this will have
a direct input on the emotional
psychological and mental health and
religious and spiritual being of a child
as they grow older as they grow older so
let's just I mean again this is this is
a conversation in its own right about
the type of boundaries but things like
you know you say to the child right I'm
the parent so when the time comes I'm
going to get you a a smartphone if you
need but there's going to be guidelines
you can't have it all day and all night
mean parents I know parents from parents
that go to that at night the child goes
to sleep with a smartphone has unfitted
access to
everything it it it's unbelievably
dangerous that just can't happen right
not as a not as a 8-year-old not as a
15-year-old even so there needs to be a
look at filters and there a lot of
people that can advise on that thing
there needs to be um people do research
on internet for homework and like that
that can be done in a public place a
child should never be on a laptop in
their own room doing their own stuff um
and and not that we need to do that
secretly it needs to be we need to talk
about it we need to explain them this is
going to this is going to be the the the
the SAT this is going to be the
boundaries um there has to be an open
door policy I'm happy for you to work on
the laptop but I'm not happy for me to
come into the room and for you to
suddenly close the laptop I want to be
able to check your history I want to be
able to know what you're going on there
are very good filters out there they're
very good monitoring systems and so on
and so forth I'm just giving a couple of
examples these conversations are long
and involved what I am saying is that
the conversation needs to begin my
feeling is my experience is the parents
are hiding they escaping they don't want
to have the conversation because it's a
difficult conversation because yes
there's push back yes there's tantrum
sometimes yes there's there's all my
friends do it why are you the only one
etc etc we need to be parents we need to
do it calmly never never get never take
the bait of a tantrum we need to do it
positively we need to always emphasize
this for the good of the child I think
very importantly also we need as parents
to build alliances with other parents
they're doing that now in New York I
know there's a whole organization called
I think it's called must or musk or
something right which is um delaying
children you know parents getting
together and and from not not from the
school not from the institutions but
parents themselves building strong
alliances together so children you know
as long as young as eight can't say all
my parents say well they don't because
there's 10 parents who got together and
they've de shout out to my cousin by m
lipsker who's very he's involved in
kronites I think in the trites chapter
of it right yeah yeah which is which is
which is a great so it's all that thing
however I need to I need to go back to
what I the way I started this particular
segment of of our conversation that in
order to do this parents are going to
have to have a very hard look at the way
they use technology themselves you
cannot have this conversation with
children and sit at a dinner table
looking at your iPhone right just can't
happen you can't U be secretive about
what you're looking obviously we need to
have our own boundaries we need to make
sure that we have self-control some of
us become addicted to our iPhone not
such terrible stuff sometimes but the L
addicted we're always checking our
WhatsApp always we think the world's
going to fall apart if we haven't
checked the last message in the last
seven minutes right so we need to look
at our own modeling and we need to share
with children our own world sometimes we
need to say to our children you know I
think I've been a little bit too much on
my own phone I'm going to now when I
come home I'm going to actually put away
my phone and I'm going to sit with you
and I'm not going to actually open my
phone for another hour and a half even
the check my emails right and share with
children how it's not easy for you
either they you need to we need to model
that that effort to children so in short
answer to your question I think
technology is a very very important
discussion in the context of prevention
of mental health particularly and
religious health and every other form of
well-being and conversations need to
begin parents need to find the strength
not to be AF afraid and to engage
positively if they don't know how to do
it they need to reach out there's help
out there people can help them people
can advise them but it's something that
every single parent today's age I think
needs to take very seriously to F thank
you to follow up on that on a practical
level uh let's talk about uh cell phone
policy in high schools and Bam in
seminaries post high school and the
reason I'm asking that because what I'm
finding here in New York is what's going
on that a lot of the very from schools
are you can't have a smartphone only
what they call a dumb phone and uh what
inevitably takes place is that every go
and boy have two phones one's a
smartphone and one's a dumb phone one
they show to the teacher one they keep
in their bag and the parents know about
it by the way so um and to me it's like
just kind of shows that the the policy
doesn't work saying Rish we can't we
can't do
it um we have to kind of recognize that
like you said it's here to stay and
educate you know educate our young about
proper usage of the internet but just on
a very practical level what would if you
principal of of a high school I think
you were once right but before PR pre
pre phone days pre phone days right if
you were a principal of a high school
you know what rules would you put in
place for uh to prevent this very thing
of having a dumb phone and a smartphone
secretly which we all know there are
things that are private but then there
are things that are secret which are
just
terrible so I'm going to ask that
question a little bit differently
because because look it's a hard one I
think every school has different
Community different expectations it's a
very very complicated thing I know some
schools what they do is they allow over
here in new way austr they allow
children to have smartphones because
that's what they have anyway and they're
not gonna and they don't want to go
through that sort of secretive process
but they actually have to hand in their
phones when they come to school because
it's a general policy that there
shouldn't be distractions during the day
so if they don't have phones during a
day when you know at the end they can
pick up their phone and leave it to the
parents to guide the children by kind of
phone but you know I want to I want to I
want to share with you a thought that
just came to mind which I wrote an
article about this once and I remember
doing this because I really believe in
this and this this I remember once in
Australia there's a big problem in in
the non-jewish schools and and the or
non religious schools even about
children engaging in in alcohol and and
substance abuse whatever the case is
right and they keep on doing stuff which
is clearly not not working so they they
bring these they bring in these lectures
to keep on talking about the the the
dangers of drugs or the dangers of
alcohol dangers of this dangers of that
and it's clearly not working so they had
this great one day I heard in the radio
I was driving in the car where they were
contemplating um raising the age the
legal limit of drinking from 18 to 21
like they do in America and I thought
you know that's really dumb because it's
not working in America and it's
definitely not going to work here either
right it's not working age limit I
mean you got to be naive to think that
that that children want to drink can
find a way around it right all these all
these all these legal limits all that
all they do is it makes harder for the
organizers of events you know it's okay
so you're 20 you're have 21 I can't off
you or whatever the case is that kind of
thing it's not doing anything for the
child really right so R Al I and I I
said it's not it's not the drink it's
the
chocolate what I mean by that
is children need their own internal
gauge children need a sense of decision
making a pause in other words you know
there's the famous um it's based on it's
based on uh Victor Frankle and so on the
the the the the pause between stimulus
and response right part of the world
that we live in today is this immediate
impulsive response to
everything children grow up with a lack
of ability to actually hold back on
things that are tempting
right where you build that mechanism to
hold back and just to think for a second
and say well I don't necessarily need to
jump into what I'm what what I want to
do is not when they're 18 in high school
or when they 21 in Yesa or or when they
12 in a high school right or in a
preschool whatever the case is you build
it very very young age there's that
famous uh I don't remember who did the
study but that famous marshmallow
experiment it's it's a famous experiment
they did with young young young children
where they put some children in a room
together and they and they put a
Marshall and they told them that if you
if you eat the marshmallow that's okay
but if you don't eat it for 15 minutes
we'll give you two marshmallow
and they went out the room and just left
these 5-year-olds and some had more
natural self-control than others and it
was actually it's a very very funny
video and um some just sort of looked at
it and looked at it and they tracked
these children throughout their life and
they saw the ones that have an internal
ability for self-control the ones that
were much more effective and successful
and well-rounded and so on but we need
to build that self-control but it
doesn't start it doesn't start when they
in I mean look sometimes rules have to
be made for whatever reason have to be
made and I'm not going to comment on
that but but if you want it to be
successful it's it's the 5-year-old you
got to start with it's building that
strength that inner strength that inner
sense of decision-making
self-control Cabas oil as we call it in
the in the in the in the typical
literature um from when they very very
young in a strong beautiful and
nurturing way but yet in in in a firm
way thank you I have a final question uh
before we we wrap this up and that is
are you optimistic about the future of
uh you know I hate this this term mental
health awareness I mean we're all aware
question is we're doing anything about
it are you optimistic for the you know
for future I'm optimistic because near
term and the far term yeah I'm I'm I'm
I'm concerned I think I think we need to
need to react I think we need to do a
lot more in the area of prevention but
I'm optimistic because we also believe
right with Torah Jews or we believe in
what Torah tells us or we believe in
we're recording this on so we know that
is about one small flame not a big flame
one small flame one little little candle
each night as long as there's one more
candle each night that's that's that's
that's the idea and I think we shouldn't
overwhelm ourselves I think every person
that's listening to this or every person
that is involved in thinking about these
these Concepts just needs to do the
little bit um if it's parents they
should do for their own children take it
seriously it might be as a resp respon
might be just being more aware of people
around us reaching out to people finding
out how they are we know there's so many
stories of people just that not every
not every story works but we know that
lots of stories about people who are
helped just by someone caring about them
someone looking out for them someone
telephoning them and just saying how you
doing I haven't seen you for a while um
in terms of prevention just little steps
you know I'm saying with parents when I
said about technology for example
starting the conversation you're not
going to get it right overnight you're
not going to get it right right away but
just keep doing it you know the the it's
still in the name of the and I heard
once I read once that said a very
similar thing and that is that parents
need to spend half an hour each day
about the of their children right before
I had kids I didn't understand I thought
it was an exaggeration half an hour
youday sometimes I think maybe half an
hour isn't enough the the concept here
is just spend time thinking about it go
to another parenting Le I know when I
was a parent of young children I'm I'm a
bit beyond that now but but um I used
love to go to Parenting lectures even if
I learned nothing new because every time
I went it was just an energy again I
would think about it again and and try
maybe something new or try or try
revisit something that I forgotten about
we just need to keep keep thinking about
it and keep doing little bits keep
adding one candle and we have to believe
that and and we we'll we'll push away
lots of Darkness with a little bits of
light Al righty well I uh I want to
thank you for doing
this uh this has been
fascinating and I want to thank uh sakim
for giving us the opportunity to have
this very important
discussion and I wish you much in the
important work that you're doing I wish
much toim and the important work that
they're
doing and uh we should all hear uh good
news uh in this area M thank you and
thank you for doing this it's been a
pleasure I also want to just Echo that
thanks to to the organizers of this
event and to amudim I I haven't been
involved with amudim that much but I've
gone on the web and I've looked at a lot
of their stuff and obviously doing very
important work both in responding to
crisis and in prevention um and I wish
them lot
of okay thank
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amudim it's unite to heal powered by
amudim and produced and presented by our
friends at charity bids we are at the
start of 36 hours action-packed hours
with Incredible content wonderful
interviews panel discussions videos all
types of presentations for those of you
who remember last year's unit to heal
you know how it was incredible how chock
full of information and presentations
and entertainment it was this year
believe it or not it's a step above a
step further and we are ready to achieve
our goal over the next 36 hours and
provide incredible content inspirational
material things that you'll be talking
about for a long time just like what
happened last year it's unit to heal.com
if you're with us you know the website
that's where you can donate that's where
you can help us achieve our goals goal
right now minutes ago I checked the
tally and we were just under
$500,000 which is an incredible
accomplishment for the early part of
this campaign over the next 36 hours
we're hoping to get to $5 million and
really make sure that amudam has what
they need to provide for the worldwide
Community during the year 2022 the
number of cases the number of situations
that amudam undertakes that amudam gets
involved with to save Liv lives and to
help families and to do anything to
benefit the community is simply
countless it's impossible at this point
to keep track of all the things that
they do and that's why their budget
continues to increase because they take
on more and more responsibilities to
help youth families and individuals in
our community and it's happening around
the world that's why we need your help
and that's one of the reasons that we
have attracted you to this amazing unite
to heal 2021 to to make sure to provide
for you incredible content so that
you'll say to yourself as you look at
the screen and as you watch the website
and look at the tally you'll say to
yourself you know what this is a worthwh
worthwhile organization this is one that
I want to be involved with this is one
that I want to support so again 36 hours
starting with this incredible live hour
and ending tomorrow with an incredible
three-hour live presentation in between
we've got game shows we've got panel
discussions we've got interviews
we have really interesting presentations
some of which I want to bring to your
attention specifically hooled squares
one of my favorites and I have the uh
honor of Hosting these episodes is a
great game show with a lot of wonderful
personalities and at 10 o'clock this
morning Eastern Time right after this
hour the first episode of three hollyood
squares will be presented at 8:45
tonight there's a segment called on fire
that's where you're going to get an
opportunity to see just how dedicated
rabbi luuck is to the organization that
he founded audin it's comical but it's
serious it's a lot of fun but it's
something that you'll see just how
seriously he takes it and that's coming
up later tonight toxic positivity is the
name of one of our sessions happening at
7 pm this evening we know that toxicity
is always a uh challenging topic but
toxic positivity that's something we
could all get into and that's happening
later on tonight many of you remember
the conversation last year with by epim
Goldberg and The Great Rosa Harel Shak
this year it's part two the name is
halik man that's the topic Rabbi
Goldberg and RAR together in a unique
interview that's at 6m tonight I believe
that was one of the most watched
segments last year this new fresh
segment with these two rabbis and two
amazing presenters will be at 6 o'clock
tonight uh Dr pelich and RAB Danelle
corbman have something called fomo and
joomo that's happening at 4:00 later
today 4 p.m. eastern time mental health
and sports with one of the assistant
coaches of the yesi university mccabes
and many other great panelists is coming
up at 1M this afternoon and there's a
very interesting discussion between AR
lightstone and one time ambassador to
Israel um Ambassador fredman it's going
to be happening today at 12:15 p.m. you
get real insights into the Abraham
Accords and the role that both of these
gentlemen had in the pre peace process
that now is being enjoyed between Israel
and the UAE it's unite to heal powered
by amudim we have a $5 million goal we
are live for this hour and thank you for
joining us from around the world
tomorrow night we'll conclude with a
three-hour live stream and stick with us
all 36 hours for all this incredible
content and so many wonderful segments
we're going to go to a video now to kick
things off it's a heartwarming video all
about giving it's actually called latet
that's the name of the song latet to
give Ron weinreich who was injured in
the Lebanon war sings this song with the
IDF choir accompanying him it is
heartwarming It's a Wonderful way to
start and it's certainly a great way to
think about and to actually undertake
giving here's latet thank you for
joining us at unit heal.com
hi to all my friends around the world my
name is Ron weinrich I am a former tank
commander in the Israeli Defense Forces
and I was injured pretty severely during
the second Lebanon war uh where I
suffered a spinal cord injury and today
in my life among the things that I do is
that I'm a professional artist and
musician a singer and I'm really really
honored to be a part of amm's giant
event this year uh and to sing with you
with my friends here from the IDF um the
song we're going to be singing is called
latet which means in Hebrew for those of
you who don't know latet means to give
it's a very famous song in Israel and uh
we're going to sing it for you here
today I wanted to share with you really
quickly that my life changed so
dramatically after my injury and the
easiest place to go was you know inside
and into depression and to feel horrible
about myself about the world but
sometimes when you step outside of
yourself and you're able to give back
and to contribute to others in one way
or another or in any way um it can be
the most significant and important thing
you'll ever do in your life whatever the
circumstance is in life you get to say
how your life goes so my friends here
and I who are all former singers in the
IDF are really excited to share this
song with you we hope you love
[Music]
it
[Music]
oh
[Music]
[Laughter]
[Music]
for
[Music]
fore
[Music]
for
[Music]
for
[Music]
fore
[Music]
oh
[Music]
oh
[Music]
let oh till m
[Music]
for
[Music]
seconds
[Music]
thank you Ron wein Reich and the IDF
Choir The Power of song and the power of
giving that's what it's all about and we
notice just how many people have already
jumped on to help us here at unite the
heel make sure to give help us achieve a
goal of 5 million by tomorrow 36 hours
from now s luck is here he's of course
the founder of amudim a pleasure to
welcome you and thanks for having me
here again this year uh we have started
the 36-hour campaign and thank God we're
off to a good start yep thank you and
it's always an honor to uh have you
participate and thank you as always for
your help with all of what amudim needs
throughout the year and especially
during our big campaign appreciate that
s um well it seems that last year must
have gone very well because you're
sticking with a with the same but
enhanced format for unite to heel 2021
tell me about this unique format of the
next 36 hours so last year as you
remember we um put this all together
with the tremendous help of Charity bids
yummy shakar and team in just a matter
of a couple of weeks right and um you
know if it ain't broke don't fix it and
people really liked it we had over about
900,000 live views and then about 1.5
million views throughout the year of the
various segments so why why look for
something new it worked and it helped us
raise money so let's give people what
they want and the segments are fresh and
the music videos are fresh and there's
all the panel discussions a lot of great
material coming up people can find all
the information on the website so some
people might be curious why the goal for
amudam continues to increase and why its
budget in general continues to increase
what can you tell us just about the last
year the case load and the work at staff
and volunteers of amudam have undertaken
so so far in 2021 amudim has serviced
over 4,700 clients whether it's matters
of abuse sexual abuse addiction mental
health matters um domestic violence
related issues um you know child abuse
neglect uh suicidality eating disorders
and so much more and as the numbers in
continue to increase of people reaching
out for help which is you know a good
sign because that means more people are
reaching out for help it doesn't
necessarily mean that more people have
problems but at least they're feeling
comfortable so we're accomplishing that
part of the goal um we need increased
staft and increased funding to be able
to continue to answer the call and it
just you know it costs money that's what
it is and one has to assume that in the
upcoming year the case load is just
going to get larger and larger um yep so
it's uh you know I made this comment to
the board a few months ago where I said
you know if we would be an investment
firm people would look at our numbers
year-over-year and be very impressed and
the response was we are an investment
firm firm we're just investing in lives
and in people's health and well-being so
yep absolutely the numbers are
definitely increasing but uh that's a
good thing because that means people are
finally reaching out and the stigma is
being broken and that's really what's
important is people to feel comfortable
when they need help to know that there's
a place to call I always mentioned
helping individuals and families uh but
you just mentioned actually saving lives
and people who are sort of on the
periphery are not 100% familiar with
amudim yet just becoming familiar with
today's live stream tell them about
life-saving situations where people
literally would be losing their lives if
not for the intervention of your staff
so I mean you know we we have this
regularly but when we're dealing with
matters such as addiction or people that
are you know dealing with issues of
suicidality and they have nowhere to
turn and they've just really you know
are lost and you know being able to help
people and their entire families get
them the proper help that they need get
them into the proper detox facilities
the proper therapy be the you know the
proper treatment um ends up giving them
the ability to continue to go on and not
just survive but actually Thrive and I
mean just this past week I got a
beautiful text message from somebody who
uh sent to me you know I'm getting
married on this and this night would
love to have you there you haven't heard
my name in about two three years um and
if not for you I wouldn't be here today
and you know we have to focus on those
and look at you know the positive
outcomes that are coming out so that it
gives us the drive to continue to go
further you know one of the big
components when dealing with mental
health related issues is unlike many
other organizations that there's you
know happy components afterwards we
don't always get to see the benefits
afterwards because a lot of people and I
understand it and it makes perfect sense
they want to forget that we exist by the
time they're done with our services
because we bring back a dark period of
their life so it makes it you know
there's very minimal of Alumni
Association you know that others would
have so we really rely on those who
believe in what we do to help us
help us help others yeah you know we're
speaking to a diverse audience right now
and providing a lot of diverse content
all through the next 36 hours I mean
there's something for everybody uh in
the next 36 hours but let's talk about
the diversity in a moment because some
people might be watching and saying to
themselves you know this is really a
problem in a specific segment of our
community a specific Geographic place in
our community that's where it's really
these cases have exploded you're you
could bear witness to the fact that this
is everywhere and it affects everyone so
I'm the first to admit that I made that
same mistake eight years ago before the
founding of amudam and I also thought
that this wasn't specific communities
but I I have to tell you the issues that
we deal with are literally across the
board from the most religious of
communities to completely secular Jewish
non-jewish minorities not minorities
families with you know that are from
broken homes and those that are not and
it just everything across the board and
also across the globe I mean we've
served clients this year alone in over
30 some OD countries around the world
and in the us alone in over I think it's
like 39 States was this year I have to
double check but it's really people from
all over and people are struggling
everywhere and you know it's something
that needs to be understood it's not a
specific segment or a specific Community
or a specific you know type of person
but it's really just truly across the
board and just everywhere and their
countries people from different
countries watching right now chances are
you've been in their country with not
you personally but I'm saying your staff
has helped out uh with cases there and
it was funny because when you expanded
to Israel for and of course the Europe
and other places people wondered wait a
second you know isn't there enough work
here but the reality was that your board
and you saw that there's just too much
happening everywhere and we need feet on
the ground or boots on the ground to
make sure we can service clients all
around the world absolutely and you know
it is one of those things where when
people reach out to us from a specific
community and you know our system and
our database and I show this to you so
you know that I'm a little bit of a data
freak when it comes to tracking
everything um has an art an AI component
to it an artificial intelligence so we
can actually realize when there's an
increase in specific countries areas
segments and types so that we can try to
attempt to get prevention in there as
well so it's not just about putting out
the fires but it's about recognizing
which areas are struggling with what
issues more than others so that we can
actually try to help before the problem
becomes too large I hope those
preventative measures are on the
increase that I I assume seminars and
onetoone encounters and things like that
are on the increase now now they started
increasing again because we can finally
get back you know out there and we'll
see what happens over the next few
months um but also with our school
programming and our educational I think
we have over six and a half thousand
students this year that are
participating in various um educational
[Music]
programmingsoftware is a powerful one um
as they all are I mean isi and his group
are just amazing they know how to put
together uh you know real powerful
pieces and they're always done in
conjunction with our clinical board to
make sure that what we're putting out is
realistic hard-hitting but with a point
you know to show people the help we're
not just here to try to uh you know
create the issue we're here to try to
solve the problem right uh you'd prefer
not to startle people with some of the
things in those videos but reality is
reality right and that's and that's
really what it boils down to you know
people in in the early days got very
very upset at us when we put out these
PSA videos and they were like oh you
know you're embarrassing a specific
Community or a specific segment and I'm
like no this is just across everything
and we have seen the amazing results of
it people have reached out to us and
said you know I saw this in this video
two and a half years ago and just from
seeing that video I was able to reach
out and get the help I needed without
even coming to amudim specifically so we
do see that they really do it helps a
lot of people all around the globe
everybody luck of course course the
founder of amudim uh a great kickoff a
wonderful start the content over the
next 36 hours remarkable people are
looking forward to so many different
segments and uh I'm looking forward to
the segment where you're going to be uh
really demonstrating your love for am
mudin by tasting certain things I won't
give any more details but people should
make sure to tune in later today at 8:45
PM they can see that video when it drops
and um and and tomorrow we'll have a
live stream for three hours toward the
end of this and hopefully by then we
will have surpassed our $5 million goal
absolutely thank you again knam for your
amazing uh it's a $5 million goal and
those of you watching from around the
world it's time for you to respond and
respond right now please please unit to
heal.com you'll see it all over social
media encourage your friends and family
to give uh we're literally saving lives
just like you would fund a firefighter
to go into a burning building and save
those lives that's what's happening at
audin they are literally firefighters
they are people who are who are putting
out firers who are saving lives who are
helping people on a daily basis and they
need your help and they need it now
please help us everybody and spread the
word it's a $5 million goal it's
certainly attainable plenty of great
entertainment and inspiration and so
many wonderful things over the next 36
hours uh unit to heal.com the website
describes so many of the things that are
going to be happening plus the times are
listed so you know exactly when to tune
in for the specific segment that you're
anticipating but these 36 hours the most
important thing is that they benefit I
move them to the point that we achieve
our goal uh when I got on the air at
9:00 a.m. eastern time minutes ago uh we
were hovering at around half a million
500,000 so we're off to a great start
but we need your help give and give
generously also one other very important
thing before our next guest every single
dollar that is given today and tomorrow
at unite to heal is quadrupled you give
a dollar it's worth four you you give 25
it's 100 you give 180 it's 540 we're
talking or is it 3 is it 720 whichever
what it is everything is quadr they'll
do the math but every one of them is
quadrupled so a $250 donation is really
$1,000 makes such a difference give now
at unit to heal.com RBI menley kadari is
executive director of AMU 302 Innovation
Center for the global network of SCH
forab I am assuming that you are a
member of the legendary k family and for
that alone it's a pleasure to welcome
you to this broadcast thanks so much for
joining us today good morning to be the
legendary nak seagull it's such a
special occasion I appreciate that you
know nice to be I would say nice to be
here thank you very much our two
families go way back and it's great to
reunite um so the the the the briefing
that I got about your role which
literally uh has a hand in every one of
the uh kabad houses around the world in
some way you are interacting with old
and providing
uh services and whatever type of um of
help is needed uh I was told that if an
emergency situation that would fit under
the amudim rubric comes up you
immediately will call tlu and his staff
and no matter where that situation is
around the world they will respond tell
me about the situation tell me about the
relationship between your organization
and Amud so again the you know the
karski family and the Gluk family also
go back generations to Rabbi Glock Senor
as well as the before pram and at any
given time in the middle of the night I
think it's actually a two-way street
where I would get a phone call mendi
who's theak in middle of nowhere you
know what happened there was a car crash
there was a plane crash there was a this
there was a that somebody's in trouble
somebody needs help and we would work
together and vice versa in areas when we
need help uh in any of the services
which later beca formatted within the
organization that became amudim and the
support that it offers the Jewish
Community we obviously have a tremendous
amount of back and forth unfortunately
the areas that amudim really trailblazed
and shined the light on and promoted and
created an awareness around uh was not
something that was fun to talk about and
it was something that I think anybody
within the Jewish Community saw bubbling
uh across across the board and it was
very very hard because you had really
good families that never really parents
that educated their kids properly sent
them to the right schools did the right
thing all along and for no uh a no fault
of their own really their children
started dealing with issues that you
know God gifted them with that was very
very hard for them to deal with and
amudim was really one of the first
organizations that you know brought it
all to light that brought it all
together and you know created an
awareness and brought the support and uh
became a desk where people can call for
for these issues and for all the other
supports that uh you know tlu and his
team really offered you know from the
visas to the uh you know to entering are
and all the other not even talking about
that whole that whole other space which
can be extremely frustrating for people
that you know that don't have a passport
or lost their passport or don't have
access especially in the I'm not even
talking about the last two years I'm
talking about pre the past two years
it's such an important point I want
people to realize that passport
situations and emergency travel
situations before Co amudam was always
there but in the last couple of years if
you made it to Israel or if you have a
student a a a son or daughter who's made
it to Israel to be in Yeshiva or
seminary is a good chance and amudam had
a hand in that yet another reason to
give and support the organization I mean
I mean it's no joke and we sometimes
like to laugh about the uh obscure
places that you Network goes to and you
know cities around the world that we
probably never heard of where
there's no matter what the geographic
problem might be or the geographic
situation might be amudam doesn't say no
to you right it could be it could be any
I I you could probably name a city or
two where they've actually helped that
which we've never heard of so first of
all we're very sensitive it's not my
network it's the Reb's Network and it's
the Reb schim and really you know this
is also an opportunity when we're
shining the the the the spotlight on
amudim and I speaking to about this
quite often there are a lot of SCH that
are living in these places that have
homes where Amud recommends people to go
to and SCH that are on the Forefront and
the front lines where you know I got a
call last week from a a a a a a a CEO of
a real you know special Jewish
organization someone from Israel's
coming his son is in middle of Utah
somewhere is there anybody that can go
just visit him put on filling with him
bring kosher food to him so there is a
you know like I said the the
relationship between Amud andab is a lot
deeper than just a phone call and help
it's really a two-way it's a two-way
street where we both do things for each
other and we complement each other uh on
the you know at the end of the day the
avas is being there for every Jew
everywhere is something that we both
share in common and and this is such an
important point because you're alluding
to it but I'm going to say it there are
hospitals and detox centers and other
Retreats and other places that are in
remote areas of the US and otherwise
that need a visit from from a rabbi and
the obviously are there to help out in a
situation like that it's a I never even
considered that as you said a lot of
times that actually comes from Amud you
know we have some and today the types of
treatments the outdoor treatments and
the camping treatments and there are so
many different types and so many
different special n Shas in so many
different places uh you know if you've
never been exposed to it then good for
you and you're very very lucky uh but
for any family who has exposed it and
knows what it means to go through uh you
know a family member being away for a
month two months three months six months
and going through the you know that
whole process it's a life it's it's it's
very very hard and to have this support
and to have this address and to have
people there that are taking your call
and to have people there that are
creating an awareness it's very
important I'm Andy karski a pleasure
meeting you and important words about
amudam thanks for joining us uh all the
reasons you just heard are great reasons
to give and give right now unit heal.com
of course course uh unite to heal
powered by Amud in the next 36 hours of
amazing content all we're asking is that
you open your heart and give get us to
the $5 million goal realize that every
time you give a dollar it's worth four
dollars four times the amount of what
you give is what amudam is really going
to get with this matching campaign so
please we have an amazing video an
amazing video that reflects Father and
Son an amazing video that reflects the
beauty of a family it's schamy Dax and D
Dax together a song called daddy deer
here it is at unit to heal.com
[Music]
daddy dear tell me
please is it true what they
said in the heaven there's a
cup that gets Fuller each
day and I
heard that
has keeps it close
nearby and he fills it with his
tears each time that we
cry Z told me Daddy
de did he tell
you
the that when sorrow strikes his
people hasem feels all the pain tell me
why does he
cry far
away in the
sky tell me
why daddy
dear all the tears in
your little
one
one yes it's true yes it's true Z told
me years
ago and his dad told him to Father's cry
for their children
and does the same and he hurt so yes he
yes he feels
our tears of pity from his eyes and his
cup sadly
flow one day when it's
full all our
troubles will
go we will dance we will
fly in the sky like the
bird and I cry little one cuz I'm
touched by your
words one more
question daddy de answer please if you
will just out deep is is come tell me
when will
it don't you think it is time let the
Sun forever shine don't you think it
is dear daddy
of little
one it is
time I question
that so let us ask
him
together together me and you father dear
do you hear our
worries our
Fe will your eyes ever
drop is your cup filled with
[Music]
tear
[Music]
unit to heal.com powered by amudim
everybody out there you are in for an
amazing treat over the next 36 hours we
have so much great content so many
wonderful things to watch interviews
panel discussions game shows including
holy youth squares and many wonderful
conversations all we ask is that you
support
$5 million goal every dollar is
quadrupled $5 million goal every dollar
is quadrupled now I'm about to introduce
a guest who in my opinion represents
thousands of parents in our community
especially here in the United States and
I'll explain why in a moment if
everybody in this demographic that we're
about to speak about would give
something to am mudin we'd reach the
goal almost immediately uh with that in
mind Rachel patashnik is here in our
studio a pleasure to welcome you toed to
heal good morning to you good morning
and Rachel uh is here to thank audin and
as I said I think you're representing
thousands and thousands of parents
because amudim secured a Visa for your
daughter to be able to get to Seminary
in Israel and I am sure you know that
there are many you you have many many
colleagues many parents out there who
are hoping that their children get to
Yeshiva and Seminary and amudim helped
them do so what happened in your case
how did it work that she eventually got
in I reached out to a neighbor and I and
I just said that I was having a hard
time knowing exactly what I needed to
get this passport and uh she told me to
email Amin and I don't know I was just
having such a hard time I was so
frustrated and I think I
actually emailed at a crazy late hour
after just being just B Beyond and
beside myself I just didn't know what to
do and I actually get a phone call at
literally midnight or 12:30 at night and
this is after I'd written my email I
couldn't sleep and and and then the
person on the phone said to me I
wouldn't ordinarily call you at this
hour but I saw how frustrated you were
just don't worry about anything and
we'll take care of you in the morning I
was like wow this is such a heaven sent
phone call I I was just it was it was
like it was like salvation in a second
you know someone coming at the at the
least expected time and just swooping in
and saving the day exactly exactly I
assume your daughter's in Israel right
now yes she is okay having a good time a
good year a productive one yes all right
uh like I said you're representative of
many parents out there who relied on a
mudam to get people uh to get the uh
their children into seminaries and
yeshivas in Israel and it's funny and
and I say this to everybody watching
right now there's some really very
serious stuff that amudam encounters
we're talking about real life-saving
situations but when it came to this to
making sure that thousands of students
would be able to be in Israel whether it
was during the summer or during the
seminary in Yeshiva year they stepped up
to make sure this got done and they did
it for everybody the way you just
described it in as in as helpful and as
calm a manner as possible from that
phone call on the experience must have
been much much different yes it was all
of a sudden you're very calm about the
whole thing as opposed to all the all
the pressure that was going on
beforehand uh did you hear from other
people do do you know of other Seminary
students whose parents were going
through the same thing I only knew of
one neighbor she was the one who
suggested that I go to amudim that was
it she was the only one I spoke to and
she said reach out to mudin they can
help you I was just so desperate for
anyone to help me and and I reached out
to other parents no one was able to help
me so she told me reach out to amudim
and and they should be able to help you
and they took care of it of course so
now when you when you've been through
this and thank God this was the only
situation you had to bring to Amud right
uh how do you how do you view what they
do in general because if they're jumping
into action for parents who want to get
their kids to Israel imagine what
they're doing when a parent God forbid
calls and says you know my son or
daughter is on the brink right so they
are such a support system and and you
and any person that's in a crisis I felt
like I was in a crisis situation and
just to get that support when you need
it and it wasn't just then it was every
step of the way every step of the
way I always got like responses and and
help and support the whole time from the
beginning to the end what was it like
getting the WhatsApp that she actually
made it to Israel must been
excited and unbelievable frankly no but
even the day before and the day of I
encountered problems because there's
always last there's always last minute
documents that I let's say that I needed
or weren't able to download and and uh
you know up until the very end I got
that support that was just necessary for
her to get there yeah and thank God that
she did and like I said there's so many
people watching right now especially
here in the United States who uh were
beneficiaries of a mudam work to get
their children to seminaries in yeshivas
and Israel give now support Amud not
just for that although if that
demographic would give frankly we'd be
at our goal already that's how many
people they helped when it came to
getting to Israel uh but please give and
be as supportive and as generous as
possible uh Rachel patashnik thank you
and I think all the parents that you're
represented here today thank you as well
for giving this big thank you to Amud my
pleasure I just have to give a shout out
to Ashi Liber he's the one who really
helped me from the beginning to the end
he's the man yes excellent thank you
very much to him and to all his
colleagues uh that um that work with
Amud uh everybody out there we have so
many wonderful things going on today uh
and tomorrow during these 36 hours of
unite to heal we have an amazing an
incredible array of videos of panel
discussions interviews game shows
including holy in squares which I'm so
excited about and so many other segments
that you're going to find both
entertaining and inspirational all we
ask in exchange for this great content
and for you enjoying a day and a half on
the unite to heel site is to be as
generous as possible every single dollar
you give is quadrupled you know what
that means 18 is 72 and 180 is 720 and
100 is 400 etc etc uh we want to achieve
our goal we want to surpass the goal way
before we get back on the air tomorrow
at 6 PM eastern time the goal is five
million every dollar is quadrupled and
we're asking everybody to please
participate and please give give
generously to amudim they are saving
lives when you give to this organization
you know that you are supporting a
lifesaving operation simple as that I
said we have some exciting things going
on uh we also have some serious things
going on and this next segment I think
is both exciting and serious the amazing
singer and performer in my mind one of
the great Superstars we have is Ellie
schel and he is here on set Ellie a
pleasure to welcome you to this
broadcast always with you thank you very
much I love speaking with you every time
it's just thank you very much we always
have a good time don't we that's right
that's right today it's a good time and
it's serious you have created and I got
a sneak peek a little little sneak peek
you have created a song and a video that
has been described to me by the people
at charity bids as a song and video that
will save lives we're going to watch it
in a minute but as an introductory word
is that a statement you agree with
you'll we'll see but uh my creative
partner and the producer of this entire
event and the CEO of Charity BS yum
Shear who we've been working on this for
the past four months together developing
this would say he's in not in
entertainment he's in edutainment y and
what this song is about is about trying
to give over the message of what the
experience is
um of the people going through these
horrible horrible
experiences in and to educate you know
our our clout on these subjects because
it's a very very hard thing to wrap your
head around and to even engage with and
I really tried to walk the line of
giving over these experiences getting in
touch with myself for this and with
someone close to me who went through
these things as well wow yes you feel
your soul in this song I'm telling you
well I have to be being straight I have
this experience myself you know I went
through on different levels different
things um throughout the song and every
lyric that I turned
over I really felt within my Within
Myself well it certainly comes out that
way and it was of course yummy who said
to me this song is literally
going to save lives I I'm asking
everybody around the world to stop for a
moment I'm asking everybody watching to
stop for a moment and if you know people
who are not watching right now recommend
that they watch this video later on but
stop for a moment you your children all
the different Generations that are in
your home right now and just watch this
video listen to the words listen to the
music listen to the heartfelt soul of
Ellie schel that's in this selection uh
it's called I will stand for you I will
stand for for you and this is an
opportunity for
everybody this is an opportunity for
everybody to watch this video and to see
and to see just what the work of amudim
is all about we'll have more with Elie
schable coming up this is I will stand
for you presented by
[Music]
audin
[Music]
I can see it in your
eyes there was something you were
hiding you were holding deep
inside you were fighting on your
[Music]
own all the nights you went to
bed under covers you you were
crying with his words inside your
head he stole your
innocence so when you feel like hope is
lost and you don't know where to go or
who to
call I will stand for you we can face
the world
together if we raise our voice and make
the choice to learn to live again I will
stand for you when you need me more than
ever we will face the truth and find a
new way
through I will stand for
you
I will stand for
[Music]
you for as long as you
remember you had troubles on your
mind at the bottom of the
B left them all
behind you said you
surrender oh you need it was more time
but the days turn to
years and your promise turned to
[Music]
Li so when you feel like home is
lost and you don't know where to
go to
call I will stand for you
we can face the world
together if Weise our and make the
choice to learn to live again I will
stand for you when you need me more than
ever we will face the truth and find a
new way
through I will stand for
you
I will stand for
[Music]
you and I love you enough for you to
hate me
this I
will for you we can face the world
together if we raise our voice and make
the choice to learn to live again I will
stand for you when you need me more than
ever we will face the truth and find a
new way
through we will stand for
[Music]
you
Ellie schel is responsible for the uh
lyrics and music for I will stand for
you and he's here of course in the unite
the heel Studios uh the song is amazing
I hope it touched Hearts around the
world like I feel it did uh there are a
couple of things you have here in the
lyric lycs are in front of me there are
a couple things you have here that
really took guts to to say and of course
to sing about um it's clear in the
opening to this song the first situation
you describe is one of abuse and one
that years ago would never have been
addressed and if it was addressed it was
only addressed in very private
situations in our community you decided
you know what this is a song that has to
save lives let's let's talk about the
situations that people are going through
yes um someone close to me um went
through went through went through this
um
um it's hard to talk about but to write
about that as well
um to give it the dignity and to give it
the
um the power and the dignity mixed it
was very hard for
me
um but it must be said and it must be it
must be spoken about and it's taken all
the people that have been been coming
out about their their situations that
have given that have allowed this song
to be born because that's true without
without all the people coming out and
saying their stories I wouldn't be able
to write about this this wouldn't be
able to be received you know and then
toward the end of the song you have a
line which ironically you pointed out to
me in the video and I I said to you I
have it circled on my lyrics and I love
you enough for you to hate me for this
those are love and hate those are strong
extremes
but but we care so much about you and
you're going to hate the fact that we're
intervening we're going to hate the fact
that we're trying to seek help for you
you're going to hate all of it but
that's how much we love you you know I
think the biggest thing that we're
dealing with as from yiden as yiden is
that the idea
of choice because here's the question
like where do you draw the line where
this person has a choice choice they
don't have the power to do this they're
we're trying to take care of them but do
we do they really have the choice do
they can they choose and or have they
lost the choice right and then and
they're in a desate situation and they
they can't see that for themselves but
and you also don't want to overstep so
this line was about a friend of mine
that I had to intervene on and I had to
I had to break the trust that I had with
this person person for my whole life
because I felt that they were in danger
and I had to do that and I risked the
relationship and they hated me for it
happened to me this is a line I wrote
you know the the best songs that I've
written have been in response to a
moment you see there's a moment that we
something happens and I went home and I
just wrote it I wrote this out and I um
and it's a very I I hope it's well
received
because to say this word in a song after
all of this yeah it's just like what
yeah and and I love you enough for you
to hate me for this uh I hope this goes
viral I hope everybody recommends to
everybody on their social media WhatsApp
groups Etc to watch this video it's
powerful it is going to be a life-saving
video because at least one if not
hundreds will make sure to seek help
once they've seen this video I will
stand for you and today we're telling
the whole community that Amud stand for
you today we're telling everybody out
there that amudim is going to be there
they just have to be supported and
continue to exist at a strong level
that's why we're asking you for your
donations and asking you to support
amudam by the way I'm always fascinated
as you know by by by songwriters in
general and your songwriting technique
it it had to be like this the song had
to be at this Tempo had to be in this
spirit with this type of of musical
background right from the moment you
started writing it it was always on that
road correct yes I mean I started I had
an idea this was this was minay I I went
through something I came home and I
wrote a little a piece I started with
this and then Yumi calls me two weeks
later I have the text messages he goes
Ellie I need you to write a song I came
up with this idea I want to talk about
amudim I want you to write a song I said
yummy I just started writing something
he goes well okay that's crazy okay
let's get together
and he kind of decided how he wanted me
to speak about things what to speak
about and it turns out that I had
everything just flowed and we worked
together to develop the video and the
and the song and yeah it just it just
was natural and it was for me it was
divine intervention that this that this
all came together this way I love the
fact that you're the the primary
spokesman that you are the center of
attention so to speak in the video like
this is you saying to the world you know
there's a there's there are individuals
and there groups of people like amudam
who are ready to help we are are here
for you and the candles what like when
you see the candles in the video what do
they mean to you so the
candles as you see that there are people
holding candles and there are
candles spread out in the back where you
can't where that are not moving so those
are representing the people that we
unfortunately couldn't
help and
um and the uh the people that are moving
with the
candles those are the people that are
reaching out
and and um you know to accept that
reality and to to know that this is this
is the reality and we need help you know
there's nowhere to go so where are we
going to go this is what amudam is
bringing and that's that's the bottom
line I don't we need help and amudim is
bringing that so there's nowhere else to
go we need to help these people and
amudam is bringing that very very much
get I'm right behind I stand for you
certainly do and by the way am am is to
stand correct and it's also a pillar but
it's to stand and I you know it's
working right you're ready to stand up
and and and scream to the hilltop said
you're ready to help people who are in
need and we know that candles in general
Flames representing the shama and there
are a lot of precious the Shas some of
whom as you indicated are representing
the ones who are lost and others of
course who are progressing thank God and
hopefully getting the help they need
mentioned to me on the air the other day
that uh he tries very hard and I get
this to not focus that much on those
who've been lost and unfor fortunately
there are too many but there are so many
positive things going on so many lives
that are being saved so many people that
are being touched uh that that you know
it's important to to emphasize the
positivity always and you know for a guy
like T who's been busy nonstop I mean I
grew up with so I see see the routine I
know him I know like he is just on fire
all day just helping people and he's got
a positive attitude about everything and
you need that and you need somebody
focused on that in order to really keep
things flowing and thank God they have
an entire team of people that help
people through all these situations and
that's really what this is what this is
all about helping helping all these
people be there for everyone yeah uh
thank you Ellie and mael on what has
been certainly received already I'm sure
as a wonderful production the song is
incredible and if Yummy's words are
prophetic and I think they are that it's
going to save lives then you've done an
amazing thing so thank you from your
mouth to God's ears I me to that unit to
heal.com uh to wrap up this opening hour
with a segment like that has been
exhilarating if you haven't seen the
video yet if you tuned in a few minutes
too late or if you know people who would
appreciate the video uh that Ellie's
responsible for I will stand for you
please make sure they see it it's
inspiring it'll Inspire them them to
give it will inspire them to think and
it might Inspire them to recommend
amudim to a family that's in need to
people out there young and old that are
seeking help for a specific situation so
please make sure that video goes uh
viral as we like to say and that people
all around the world watch it uh we have
a full lineup today that goes all the
way until 9 o'clock Eastern time
tomorrow night and I'll join you with
many wonderful guests toward the end of
our fundraiser between 6:00 and 9:
Eastern time tomorrow evening I hope
you'll join us for that live stream
meanwhile we have a goal the goal is $5
million I want to get back on the air
tomorrow night with that goal having
already been achieved and let's get into
bonus time and raise even more uh
speaking about from our mouth to God's
ears so five million is an attainable
goal we need your help if you are
somebody who appreciates the work of
amudim if you're somebody who's been
helped by amudim with the services we
described with Rachel earlier of getting
somebody into Israel if you're somebody
who simply has called amudim for a
recommendation or for some type of
information that they could provide
they're every where in every nook and
cranny of the Jewish Community helping
people if you're somebody who has a
neighbor or a friend or a relative who's
been helped by amudim whatever the
situation is please give and give
generously with your generous donations
Amud could have a very strong 2022 and
really start the calendar year off in a
wonderful fashion every single time you
donate or anyone in your circle donates
in the next 35 hours it will be
quadrupled and you know what that means
your $1,000 donation becomes 4,000 and
every donation becomes even much more uh
worth uh it becomes becomes much more so
please give to amudim give generously
and make sure that you spread the word
because when your contributions are
being quadrupled by wonderful matchers
your contribution goes a long way unit
to heal.com the content we have for the
rest of the day is amazing incredible
panel discussions wonderful interviews
great game shows including holid squares
which begins 60 seconds from now
wonderful music videos fantastic
discussions and some unique things
including a game show where we're going
to see just how dedicated S glck is to
the Amud cause it's half serious and
half comical it's a lot of fun and it's
going to be on later tonight also there
are many wonderful features that are
being presented including AR lightstone
and Ambassador Freeman about the Abraham
Accords including R efim Goldberg and
refal schita um the I would call it the
second part of their uh very
well-received conversation which began
last year this time the topic is halik
man was one of the most watched segments
last year their encounter and I'm sure
this year will be the same that's coming
up later today thank you for joining us
unit to heal.com give and give
generously and tell everybody in your
circles to do the same support amudim I
will speak to you tomorrow my name is n
seagull it's been a pleasure opening up
this campaign let's get it done
everybody unite the heal.com powered by
amudim and presented by our friends at
charity
[Music]
bids welcome to another charity bids
production of holy it squares in
association with same mov.com the only
place to create and share personalized
video messages from your favorite Jewish
stars and we are all here benefiting our
dear friends at
amudim tonight's holy IDs Charlene amof
Benny
fredman mayor K Ellie libowitz Elon corn
blo meny
pelen felig harell Ellie schel and
Nissim black our two contestants tonight
on the uh X Podium we have rabbii Glu
who's the director of amudim Rabbi Glu
thanks for being here thank you for
having me and representing the O Podium
we have Yus who is the clinical case
manager at amudam thanks for being here
tonight thanks so much for having me and
we are ready to kick off our game R by
Gluck you won the toss backstage and you
get to choose our first
celebrity oh no I'm going to get into
trouble no matter who I pick first so I
got to go with uh we'll start with
Charlene all right Charlene you're all
set here's your question which of these
childhood series had an ongoing Jewish
character is it a The Hardy Boys B the
Tom Swift series C Encyclopedia Brown or
D Henry hugin's Ramona series Regis I'm
gonna call a friend I'm gonna phone a
friend I think that might be a different
game I'm just joking okay so I know this
because this is a very very very easy
one and we may or may not have been told
to lie very confidently to mess with you
Rabbi Glock so you may or may not know
that I'm absolutely fibbing or telling
you the truth but I'm very very
confident in the answer and the answer
is D all right she says Henry Huggins
remon series RBI glck do you agree or
disagree I will respectfully disagree
and the answer is The Hardy Boys whose
cevra included Phil Cohen who appeared
in the first Hardy Boys and then some
other series as well X gets the square
we move on to our next question y who do
you have for us I'm going to go with
mayor K mayor K Center Square he won't
be a k for long he'll likely be an X or
an o in just a couple of seconds here a
few months ago uh as We Know by tski
passed away and he was best known for
the way he fused Torah principles with
his understanding of Psychiatry he was
also a bestselling author of self-help
books and they had a groundbreaking
collaboration with which syndicated
newspaper comic strip artist is it a
Gary Trudeau of dunesbury B Gary Larsson
of the faride Charles Schultz of peanuts
or D Bill Waterson of Calvin and Hobs
wow fantastic ask a question as you all
know I'm I'm so deep in the
self-development self-help space I love
going about motivating people throughout
the world through videos and and the
content that I creates so this is
something right up my line Robie torsi
is a a legend a giant of a man I love
his work and so it goes without a doubt
uh that I I'm I know of all his work and
his collaborations throughout his years
and number c is definitely the answer
Charles from the penis yeah you agree or
disagree I'm going to agree and uh in
fact o gets the center Square it is
Charles Schulz and we move on TR luuck
who's our next celebrity uh we're going
to go with I guess I got to try to
figure out how to win this one um Ellie
schel all right Ellie here's your
question we're going to the superhero
theme uh everybody knows that Superman's
founding fathers were two nice Jewish
boys named seagull and Schuster and that
Batman's Creator was Bob Kaine who was
originally Robert Khan Nam the comic
book character that was in fact a nice
Jewish boy is it a Matt Murdoch the
blind superhero named Daredevil was it B
Dick Grayson Batman's teenage sidekick
Robin was it C Steve Rogers known as
Captain America or D Ben Grim known as
the
thing wow so first of all I'm a huge fan
I just saw Justice League um the DC
Universe Justice League uh Snider cut
and huge fan of Batman and Superman and
I know for sure that um if it was Batman
and Superman there's no way they would
have two Yen fighting against each other
so it's definitely not going to be
Batman and Superman and you know maybe
it's I'm between the two of them Matt
Murdoch big fan of Matt Mo Murdoch also
I don't think he was a yid so I'm going
to say Grim you know because we're very
very you know we we we d a lot we suffer
so Ben Grim sounds like a yisha guy so
I'm going to go with Ben
Grim agree or disagree with Ellie schel
so I mean I would normally always agree
with everything Ellie says but you know
considering what we do at amudim Grim is
the opposite of what we try to represent
we want to make sure that people are
happy and healthy and doing much better
so based on that I'm going to choose to
say that I disagree because I can't have
somebody grim being Affiliated or
Associated I love it I love it well
looks like you may have a choice there
RBI Glock because the thing Ben Grim was
so Jewish that apparently Marvel uh
established for him a special belated
Bar Mitzvah issue in 2002 circle gets
the square and now y's in a position
where she could actually win this thing
y who's your choice Benny Freedman
please Benny Freedman who Benny Benny
just remember okay Benny Freeman who in
a previous episode You Might Recall was
here as a contestant and now he's become
one of the celebrities on our board
Benny here's your question uh what was
not the name of a kosher restaurant a
Rosen blo and Rosetti B boy chicks c
cheers D mamish Chow Chinese or E pelum
kosher which was not the name I go like
this Elon be careful well as you know
I'm a big foodie I'm famous for uh for
that so it's one of the things you're
famous for it's one of the many things
I'm famous for so I will say with uh a
lot of confidence that it is option A
all right so Benny Freeman says that um
Rosen blo and Rosetti was not the real
Coosa restaurant what does y say agree
disagree all right I'm going to have to
agree with Benny uh the answer is mamish
Chow Chinese and X gets the square and
we continue the game everybody luck
who's next H meny pelen meny pelen who
also during our last production here at
flow motion Studios was on this side of
the action now he's a celebrity in one
of our boxes and your questions as
follows today the U symbol mendi uh the
OU symbol of Kos can be found in over a
million products the first mainstream
dream product in 1923 to feature the OU
and the OU logo that we still see today
was a 's cakes B hind baked beans C Coca
Cola or D Nabisco
Saltines that is uh interesting you
mention it because my grandmother was
born in
1923 and she always said said that um
she was able to buy a kosher Coke a
kosher Coke she always said this I could
kosher Coke and she said the coke did
things to her that amudim needed to help
you get over so U Back Then it had
different ingredients so I'm going to go
definitely confidently with Coke and I'm
not just saying that because they told
me you got to be confident but I know
this R glck you could set yourself up in
a really big way here on the board do
you disagree or agree with Mendy pelen
um so first of all Mindy thank you so
much and um it's great that your uh
grandmother back in 1923 was talking
about
Coca-Cola but uh and Amud and Amud him
obviously um you know which uh has been
around a lot longer so that's great so
thank you but I am actually going to
respectfully disagree RBI luck has set
himself up really nicely the answer is
Hines who in fact be Hines baked beans
who in fact took their relationship with
kosher consumers so seriously listen to
this they run National ads each pesak
season reminding people that their
products were not Kosh La pesak how do
you like that X gets the square and that
means that Rabbi glck is in a good
position and Y needs to do some blocking
here Y which celebrity you calling on
all right hanala help me out here hanala
it's time for your question and here we
go prior to co there were over 300 pesak
programs available worldwide that number
dropped last year most experts think
that we're going to get back to that
figure in the very near future hopefully
in 2022 which of these places has never
hosted a Bonafide pesak program a the
Queen Elizabeth 2 B Shelley adon's
Palazo Casino Resort C the park high at
Dubai and D the rickest premium in
Croatia which of the four has never had
a real pesak program all right I'm a
very traditional girl I've never gone to
a pesak program I also don't cook so we
generally go to my mother-in-law plus
we're Sparty so we eat rice who needs a
hotel I'm going to ask the magic aall
cuz when a doubt ask the apall that's
our usual policy yeah the answer is not
what the apall
suggested um I'm going to go there's
definitely Croatia Kad and Croatia I'm
going to go with B because there's
nothing kosher about gambling it doesn't
feel like good uh combination That's The
Palazo Casino Resort Y is it a agree or
disagree I got to disagree with Han over
here uh the answer is The Palazo Casino
Resort We cannot put the X in that
square in order to win as we know the
rules just let's stop for a although
although I do need to agree with kanol
regarding the um uh gambling so thank
you that's something that we are seeing
a huge increase of especially with
online gambling you know throughout Co
so thank you for mentioning that and
it's important that we understand an
increase also because the gambling
resorts are close to the Jewish
neighborhoods or inre because people
were able to do it online much easier
because they were home stuck and
quarantined and had easier access
understood RAB Gluck you have two at
least two that I see opportunities to
actually win this thing cuz you have to
earn that final Square uh which
celebrity would you like to call on
Ellie let's give you a chance ellz are
you ready for your question I am ready
all right here here we go uh the
Catskills the borch belt is known as the
home of gr singers the Concord kers and
many others uh the fact is that that
area was once home to over 500 Resorts
that attracted Jewish vacationers from
all around the tri state area uh despite
the large number only a handful were
known as a full-time Sher shabis and
glot kosher Resort which was not of this
list which was not a Sher shabis Resort
a the Pioneer Country Club B the homak
resort C Shanks Paramount D the Pine
View Hotel or E the spring Glenn Resort
I'm going to go with d the Pine View
Hotel Pine View
Hotel the only one not Sher shabra by
Gluck you agree disagree you know I I
thank you for your help and the support
but uh I do remember hearing amazing
stories about the Simas Tor at the Pine
View Hotel so I am going to respectfully
disagree I could tell tell you what it
was like yff at the Pine View Hotel as a
kid the answer is Shanks Paramount X
gets the square and Rabbi Gluck
congratulations uh another great Victory
here at holud squares more coming up
stay right where you
are hello hello everybody stop what you
doing mirl hi hey what's going on what's
up mitv Nation this is n in Black hi
it's Charlene Amo and so excited to
connect with you over at se
ma hi I million
Tessa it's your friend Mar K wishing you
a happy birthday the yares are having an
anniversary 30 years Nama your cousin
Eric reached out to me this is going to
be my performance for your wedding I
know that many changes are taking place
Gabriel but nothing can stop your bar
mitzvah each Mitzvah that a person does
Connects them more and more to his I
cannot believe how incredibly mature and
capable you both are happy birthday
livey happy
birthday do you have any idea what a
special day it
[Music]
is welcome back to round two of H Le
squares created for and in support of
Amin we're ready for round two with two
contestants representing the ex Podium
uh we have Su Eller Social Work intern
at Amud thanks for being here today the
circle Podium is represented by David
wearden who is director of project heel
and supervises the interns at Amud D
welcome to the game and we're ready to
start sorry you won the uh coin toss
backstage you get to choose our first
celebrity so exciting I think I'll go
with Nissim Nissim black Center Square
here we go Nissim the question is when
it comes to adding salt to a recipe most
chefs seem to prefer a version known as
kosher salt over most every other salt
type what is kosher salt a a coarser
form of the table salt crystal that's
used to caser meat by drawing out blood
b as kosher has become synonymous with
clean and pure kosher salts a cleaner
and purer salt free of additives to
prevent clumping C salt that's been
evaporated from Israeli bodies of water
like the Dead Sea or D another name for
low sodium salt you know what um I
actually don't use kosher salt I use
Himalayan salt um and that's because
it's much better to keep all of your
minerals you know uh magnesium potassium
so I really recommend Himalayan salt but
since that was not on the list it's the
same stuff that they sell you in the
store it's another name for low sodium
salt so his answer is these sorry do you
agree disagree I disagree and the answer
is a it's a corser form of table salt
crystal that cers meat by drawing the
blood out of it and Nissan black in the
center Square that's where we put the X
and we move on to doid Wine Garden and
your choice
is it's a tough one I mean I want to
pick Benny Freeman with one of his songs
but then Nissim is going to want me to
rap and I don't think anyone wants to
hear that um but I'm going to go with
Benny regardless you're going shopping
and you call to ask if I need anything
and you say to please spare whatever you
know whatever the message is you're
asked to pick up vanilla ice cream you
get to your grocery's freezer section
they've got a whole bunch of different
brands forget about H stroll for a
moment let's say the person's not that
careful about H stroll but he's got the
briers and the kondik The Good Humor
Klein's ice cream Etc and then it says
well since you asked for vanilla ice
cream you're limiting my options
obviously it would be Kleins because if
you if you only have one option like you
said ice cream it would be Kleins uh D
what do you say agree or disagree with
Benny um I'm actually going to disagree
with Benny uh he'll disagree with Benny
and X will get the square the answer is
Kleins the other brands cut back on milk
fat to save money they are not regarded
by the government as real ice cream they
are an iced milk dessert but Klein and
hogendas and Ben and& Jerry's they are
real ice creams Benny what did I tell
you complicated or what uh we have we
have um s here who I think is an amazing
position on the board sorry should I
guess where you might want to go which
celebrity you can guess if you'd like
would it Hana great guest Hana we have a
question for you you all set BN ready
let's go which of these performers did
not which of these performers did not
record a cover of Lenny Solomon's minion
man a the maab Beats B Eighth Day C the
skiing Rabbi Rabbi shinefeld D yid cor
from Australia
which a lot of pressure pressure I have
a performing master class I got to pull
this
off
um I actually
don't no say me one more time just read
me those names one more time a is the
maab Beats B is Eighth Day C is the
skiing Rabbi Rabbi shinefeld and D is
yid cor from
Australia um I am going to go with the
maab Beats because I am a big fan of
their work and I don't remember hearing
the minion man on any of their albums
choice is maab sorry what do you say
agree or disagree I don't have a clue
statistically I think I'm best off
disagreeing she disagrees that the maab
beats and Lenny Solomon have an AC
capella version of Minion man the answer
is Eighth Day I think Benny knew that
and their ex gets the square and we say
congratulations to sui and we send her
boss packing Siri will continue on and
face her by Gluck in the final more
coming up everybody keep it here at Holy
squares hello hello everybody stop what
you doing Merl hi hey what's going on
what's up mitv Nation this is n black hi
it's Charlene Amo and I'm so excited to
connect with you over at
se hi million
Tessa it's your friend Mary K wishing
you a happy birthday the yares are
having an anniversary 30 years Nama your
cousin Eric reached out to me this is
going to be my performance for your
wedding I know that many changes are
taking place Gabriel but nothing can
stop you of our Mitzvah each Mitzvah
that a person does Connects them more
and more to has I cannot believe how
incredibly imature and capable you both
are happy birthday liy happy
birthday you have any idea what a
special day it
[Music]
is welcome back to the final round of
Hool squares created for and presented
in support of amudim we have our two
finalists with us you know the rules our
celebrities are ready Su Eller who is a
social work intern in am mudin is at The
X Podium Sor good luck to you and Rabbi
Glu he's at the Circle Podium he of
course is the leader of amudim and he's
ready for the final round Rabbi GL good
luck to you thank you very much you w
the toss backstage choose a celebrity
please since I'm planning on opening up
the amudam restaurant I'm going to have
to uh go with Elon to make sure that he
takes good care of me interesting choice
this question actually happens to be
about food while quinoa Elon has become
a major part of pesak diets and is well
on its way to giving potato based non
gabr products a run for their money this
wasn't always the case in fact when it
first got on the radar of the kosher
Community many were ready to add kitney
add the quinoa rather to the list of
kitos why was this is it because of a it
was from South America where a lot of
kitos eating spard were from is it B
Because of its high gluten count is it C
because of its genetic cousin to corn or
is it D because in its country of origin
it's often processed like grain what was
the reason that quinoa was hesitant to
be used by ashkenazim that's a great
question uh as you know I'm a big quinoa
fan been eating it for since I was a kid
um K kinas Sushi By the way on PES was
fantastic but um so okay so read me the
questions again the answers again and I
I have the answer a because it's from
South America lots of spart and we're
from there uh B Because of its high
gluten count C because it's a genetic
cousin to corn and D because in its
country of origin it's often processed
like grain what was the reason that
people were hesit
D says D Rabbi Gluck do you agree or
disagree with his answer so I have you
know I got to be very careful here
because I obviously can't go with the
Sparty answer cuz then I'm going to lose
Charlene as a friend so I'm going to
stay away from that you know we got to
keep oury sisters in check um but I will
agree uh with Elon on this answer Elon
said D the answer is D because in its
country or it's often processed like
grain and circle gets the square and we
move on to sori which celebrity are we
going to Sor I'm going to go with
Charlene I think it has to be Charlene
Charlene we have Olympic question for
you as the 2020 Summer Olympic Games in
Tokyo have become a nid to 2021 and
maybe even later than that here's a
question uh the first Jewish American to
win an Olympic gold medal was Meyer
primin in 1900 and 1904 at the Paris and
St Louis games he brought home gold in
which sport a polo B lacrosse
C fencing D track I actually know the
answer to this because we were talking
about it with the kids at the shabat
table one night the answer is C fencing
all right I thought the question was
complicated uh all right sorry are you
agreeing or disagreeing I'm going to
kind of have faith that Charlene is a
nice person like I think she is I'm
going to agree with her the answer is
track circle gets the square and Rabbi
Gluck in a very good position uh Rabbi
Gluck who are you choosing we're going
to go with uh let's go with mayor K oh
mayor K interesting point mayor remember
you know we got something going on so we
know we don't play games here you know
many things going on Tic Tac Toe
strategist might question Rabbi Gluck on
this Choice uh mayor here we go your
question is also Olympic related you
might recall or you may have heard from
prior Generations that Mark Spitz
represented the United States and the
Jewish Community very well with a record
seven gold medals at the the
1972 Summer Olympics in swimming he went
to sh that Russia sha and because he was
such a celebrity he ended up sitting
next to a future president of the United
States which one wow fantastic question
s thanks for entrusting me with this
power move right now your is making
power moves and this is no different
right here right now so I won't let you
down my friend I want let you down
Russia sh as we all know shows a power a
great time to to to meet new people and
create connection and this was a big big
Russia shunter for this gentleman indeed
um so without a doubt this one have
would have to be uh good all um Teddy
Teddy Roosevelt Teddy Rosevelt now one
second I thought you're supposed to give
four options no we don't sometimes will
do a true or false question we'll
sometimes do uh mayor it might be a good
idea for me to just transmit to you the
question one more time in the
1972 we're good 19 we'll definitely go
with that in the 1972 Summer Olympics
Mark Spitz brought home to California's
seven gold medals he was such a
celebrity when he got to sh that Russia
sha he was sitting next to a future
president of the United States who was
it mayor future president um that's a
great question a future president uh so
president that wasn't before 1972 of
course without a doubt um a a friend to
the Jews someone who was uh Florian
charismatic he always found his way
though he wasn't Jewish himself um JFK
was uh someone who would just pop into
sh once in a while and try to like the
Jewish F well we've certainly learned a
lot about mayor K in this conversation
uh Rabbi Gluck do you agree with the
John F Kennedy answer I'll tell you what
I agree with I agree with the fact that
mayor K is
amazing and straight face no matter what
comes out of his mouth and always with a
smile
I'm going to respectfully um disagree in
1972 the the uh governor of California
at that time was future President Ronald
Reagan and he was sitting next to Mark
Spitz and his California synagogue I'm
goingon to have to take responsibility
for this one I failed in my mission uh
sorry tough board for you where do you
want to go which celebrity really really
just want to beat SP here I think um so
I'm going to go would definitely I heard
I got a raise so I'm going to go with
Benny all right Benny Freeman you ready
for this
[Music]
question well I hope you
are I was
borley here we go the first art scroll
publication Benny the first art scroll
publication was a not there the art
scroll sitter B millas Esther C millas
Rus or D the art scroll ha great
question I'm going to go with um Teddy
Roosevelt that's funny because mayor K
said uh who did he say again JFK and I
actually read the whole history of the
art scroll uh recently so what's the
what's the uh what were the options
again a the art scroll sitter b migil
sester c migas Rus D the Arts girl I am
going to very confidently go with option
D did you say b or d doid d as in the
art scroll ha sorry AG or disagree I
respectfully disagree she disagrees the
answer is migas Esther and X gets the
square and we move on with like luck you
do have an opportunity here who do you
want to call on um I guess I'm going to
you know have to go to my savior even
though he didn't change his hat or
change the color of the Hat Ellie schel
don't let me down baby Ellie schel
Center Square for the victory how
fitting the director of amudim its Chief
the person in charge could end up being
the Victor in this competition Ellie all
this on your shoulders here we go the
question is uh what does the word Torah
mean is it a to teach B history or C
happiness um I'm going to have to say
first of all Torah
MOA Torah is the Moa TOA Moira but it
also how can I say that it means to
teach
if I also experience
happiness and and there's so much
history in there and I think it means a
lot of different things to a lot of
different
people
sh so the answer
is all three baby but if you had to say
one of them I'm going to have to say
happiness RAB his answer is happiness do
you agree or disagree so you know one of
the main goals that we have at amudam is
to make people happy so we're going to
go with the opposite approach that we
did last time and this time I'm going to
agree and say that we want to bring
happiness to people and if we do things
correctly we could bring them happiness
however before I give my final answer
Phil I must say that I've never heard of
Torah meaning happiness yet so uh um I
am actually agreeing in theory that we
want to bring happiness to people but I
am going to disagree with the answer for
the purpose of this question to the game
the word Torah means to teach circle
gets the S Rabbi is the champion thanks
so much for tuning in to this edition of
holy it
sares all right all
right
[Music]
so first off we want to say thank you to
Amud first of all what's your name okay
oh you want to start off like that I
mean we're talking to a whole new
audience I know it's true uh I'm y
linger what's your name my name is Naki
Gordon nice to meet you and we're here
to discuss our favorite moments the most
powerful moments from meaningful people
podcast yes which we host together and
we have really incredible people but so
first of off I want to say thank you to
s for being one of our first guests
being so vulnerable and just talking
about amudim and the organization and
what they do it's it's mindboggling you
remember yes I remember I know you're
going with this I know I called him the
garbage man of Cl I wasn't going to say
that I don't even remember that I was
going to say do you remember after just
like looking at his phone like how much
it blew up I I think that the statistics
that you know they put out are just like
maybe sometimes you think oh these are
just numbers but when we were able to
sit down with s and discuss with him
each number represents a person in
crisis really czy and it's it's just
wild so you know C says this all the
time and we just Echo it that the day
that amudam is able to just close down
and cease to exist is going to be a
beautiful day right but as long as
they're not please uh give them money um
so we want to go through a few of our
moments nak we didn't have to we wanted
to we want to go through a few moments
um okay so we're going to break it down
this is I'm just talking from my heart
so I have it written down over here noi
Roberts we had which I think it was your
first time ever meeting him right my
first time meeting noi you've heard
about him a little bit it happens to be
somehow related to my my brother's wife
the Hassan family originally from jalter
so ah so um is everyone jalter related
is it jalter or jalter jalter I keep
forgetting I know I also thr jalta you
went to jalta yes did you land on Water
I did not okay but people do people land
near there yeah I supposed to take off
to leave from there but this unfun fact
about jalter is that when you go there
it's there's Al like very often storms
so I had to actually drive to Spain and
I needed my passport to was so not worth
it so I definitely don't recommend to
land or take off from the water there
like in a plane like a water no no no
not like that that's what I'm talking
about oh no talking about a Runway next
to water the runway is literally next to
the ocean and you can see Morocco it's
I'm talking about like one of those
water jet planes no oh no I did not no
that would be so cool I know and I'd be
so scared to do that one stereotypes I
think I think that maybe would have been
safer cuz it's prepared to land in the
water either way um so we had noi
Roberts and he said a lot of things
definitely check out the full episode
but there's one story that I I was blown
away by and I'm here listen to the story
you said a lot of stuff to me a lot of
stories and inspiration that sh says
about you like I don't know 5 years ago
there's one particular story and I think
it's it it makes sense with what you
just said now that maybe you could share
I don't know if it's like a very private
thing and I'll reference it hit me
cigarettes oh okay
I'll say it yeah I'll say it it's it's
not a comfortable story to share that's
why I'm asking and maybe I'll offset it
you're so kind for asking on the air'll
edit so kind so cool you want to know
something the more real this interview I
think the more ill touch people listen
and the more staged the more wooden
it'll feel so I appreciate it and I will
share it and I'm not comfortable it it
it irks me and I feel it wasn't even my
place and so many times in history I've
gone through through that story in my
head did I do it right did I not do it
right and I really believe with hasham I
think I did the right thing I was I was
Jala to give the story some context is
is pretty much like a dutyfree shop in
in in in an airport right there's no
Duty on cigarettes there's no Duty on
alcohol it's much cheaper um there than
most places in the world and I I wasn't
in jalter very long I mustn't it could
even have been in my first year that I
was there and I got a phone call if I'm
not mistaken it was late on a Sunday
night and a guy said to me hi this is X
Y and Z and I I said no not ringing any
bells I don't know who you are he's like
yeah okay doesn't matter I know who you
are that's never a comfortable thing to
hear you know late at night yeah we're
listening in we got and and he said is
it possible you can come and meet me
now I said is it is it urgent he goes
yeah yeah it's urgent I said where are
you he was actually next to the runway
in jalta the runway in jib here's a cool
piece of information there are like
Railroad Road barriers that come down
when the plane has to land cuz the plane
lands across the road that we drive
through into Spain so he's I'm right by
the runway I okay so I I I have a little
motorbike so I went down there and I met
this guy and then I recognized him I
know the family he married into in
England and it pains me to say this but
he was what you would call a from guy
okay P be right and if that's what
qualifies you right but he and he said I
need your help so I'm like
getting getting ready ined mode yeah of
course what can I do for you and he says
I've bought a camper
van does that make sense like a you know
yeah rvh type thing right and he says
well there's going to be we're going to
replace the bottom in it it's going to
be a fig and we're going to put
cigarettes in it we're going to we're
going to smuggle them across the border
and I'm going to make a
fortune I'm I'm maybe 22 years old
something like that and he looks at me
and says I just need someone to buy the
cigarettes every day store it in a house
I'll do the rest just once a month I'll
come I'll take it out your
house and he was offering me some
exorbitant amount of money per month to
do what I said $5 million okay I'm it
wasn't 5 million but uh it was a lot of
money it was it was well more than a
regular salary a month to do his dirty
work for him but maybe even legally I
don't even know you know
buying cartons of cigarettes holding
them in boxes and then he can come and
take them and legal or otherwise I just
looked at him and instinctively
something took over inside of me and I
just looked at this older more
established guy and I said to him do you
believe in
God do you believe in
Hashem and it's like this was not the
setting for a musm right and he looked
at me like with disdain so to speak I
said answer the question and he kind of
shifted from foot to foot he said yeah I
said do you also believe that on rash
fixes exactly what you're going to make
for the
year
he's like yeah I said then this isn't it
this this this can't be right no I won't
help you and I walked
away and then a plane landed and hit his
van you wish unfortunately if I think he
spent some time in jail for other
smuggling offenses and it just doesn't
make sense to me it doesn't make if it's
if it's wrong and it's not right and
it's illegal don't do it who are you
going to trick I understand people feel
desperate a time I and I get that bit
but that's not the answer and maybe
let's offset that story with a much
nicer story I'll tell you yeah I
wouldn't say for that one guy who's
smuggling cigarettes out of jolta right
now it's super awkward listening to this
podcast he's like oh my gosh maybe I'll
listen to music on to me yeah okay so I
want to break down this story for
everyone go ahead break it down so I I
went to noi in
200 15 2016 and still I we had a great
job us and I didn't know him that well
but that that story stuck with me it was
so powerful to hear like in that moment
noi like had the opportunity to make a
lot of money and okay just he and
technically wasn't doing anything
illegal could have gotten away with it
and still he's like do you remember the
story cuz obviously we just played it
but I know but when we're talking to
each other we're just talking and we're
not watching it so it sounds like out of
context like something illegal but no I
I know you're talking about that was
really an incredible story and it takes
a lot of you know just you know being
planted and having knowing where roots
are and and not and not faltering so as
a as a person that was really an incred
I think one of the best parts of of
Hosting this podcast is is the ability
to meet such amazing people yeah so true
and become friends with I mean not all
of them not like friends lot lot of them
we have relationships with follow with
um so yeah who who who who I I think the
answer is both for both of us who texts
you the most or messages you the most of
our guests yeah like that I'm again I I
become friends friends with like
probably Benji Epstein yes me too Dr
Benji is the man hewes Benji Epstein but
there are others there are others as
well for sure something that you know we
have is that we sometimes forget the the
the episodes that we put out and who
we've done them with because there have
been so many at this point yeah so I
wouldn't even even remember it but you
know what transitioning into a really
incredible moment that I loved I loved
we were um we had the honor of of
traveling one Sunday morning to Deal New
Jersey
um awful rainy day I got a ticket no no
no no that was time that was a different
time oh gosh um this is why we don't
like traveling for episodes and we went
to Yakov shaki yes it was an amazing
amazing um episode we we went to his
house yeah we set up in his house and in
a living room over there and he was
telling us a story that I thought was so
incredible and this is it we were doing
a a kumit album my first kumit album not
talking about those were the days that I
did lately and brought back a lot of the
older Jewish music music that the youth
actually should know what beautiful
songs we
had first comes this album my my manager
and producer back then my dear friend
Yohi briskman who have tremendous aaru I
was with him for 15 years and he tells
me yov I found out all the songs who
composed what because we want to give
credit to the composer you know we're
singing songs some of them passed away
some of older songs you want to give
credit you want to write inside who
composed
what one song this nobody knows nobody
knows who composed the song I said I got
to find out somehow I
[Music]
cannot it's a stunning song that I sing
in my house in this house every shabas
and we don't know who wrote it I get out
of the studio I get a phone call from my
Aunt Sarah Mala who's at sadas still
living barash my father's sister her
husband passed away but she's still
living and giving classes to so many
people and helping so many people she
goes I said Auntie Sarah why do I have
this host that you call me at 11:00 at
night she says my friend is very very
sick with muscular distrophy I sleep by
her a few times times a
week and the one thing she appreciates
is your songs and music would you able
are you able to come ever to to visit
her I said in Sarah actually I'm in
Brooklyn right now is it too late she
goes no no the whole family is here I'm
here actually now the whole can you come
all right I shoot right over I start
singing this she I I proceed to go there
there's a room and this woman
unfortunately laid out on this hospital
bed and all the children around her all
her
children and she only can move her
eyelids through the letters of the
computer and tell and say a b c iive Bas
and very hard to for her to get one
sentence out but she tells me I told her
I have plenty of time I want you to tell
me exactly the songs you want to hear
and I'll sing it she proceeds to tell me
how much she loves Mama R and how much
it means to her start singing the song
the kid starts singing a along and you
see her eyes even just a little bit you
see the joy you see the joy even even if
she can't move her body and show but you
see in her eyes sometimes in their eyes
you could see everything and you see
that Joy emanating coming through I
start to get emotional she gets
emotional the kids get emotional starts
sing and I proceed to sing sh and a lot
of the songs that I do finally I say you
know what plenty of time she goes okay
what were you working on today today I
said I I did a medley I said you know
what's funny I did a medley and I did
one of my favorite songs and nobody
knows who composed the song she goes
what's that it's a back and forth
conversation for a while I start to
sing and I
sing and the husband says it's funny
that you mention it I composed that song
who I was 14 year I think he was 14 or
16 I'm not sure
sure I composed that song in Camp called
Reena when I was a
teenager he is an artist today he's an
artist for a long
time I think a famous artist rabona win
rib composed the song his wife
unfortunately you know passed away after
many many torus but that song that night
that time that place Hashem was was able
to take me by the hand through my Auntie
Sarah who gave me a big to sing for a
person that was suffering and give them
a little Joy you know in their sorrow
but at the end of the day he composed
that song and I was able
to Hashem you taking me by the hand
you're leading me by the hand through
every detail of life even when I'm
searching for a composer of a song
you're giving me a to sing for his wife
who
suffering but yet able to understand
your ways and seeing that there is a
path and there's a path for everyone
there's a path everybody has to find not
everybody's going to do it through music
or do it through the public stage but by
why why Jacobson said a beautiful line
one of the greatest lines I've ever
heard and I heard this and I told him
this by the way and because I did a I
did a whole thing with him by the way
this house through the Corona virus this
room and that studio over there became
like a a concert hall and it was
unbelievable time for CLA Stoll and also
the power of music I saw it through the
virus how much it hundreds of thousands
of people reached out to me around the
world saying how they're they're they're
thirsty give me something and music was
able to be that food that spiritual food
and I was able to to do something R by y
why Jacobson one of my
favorites and he said something so
beautiful and he he I don't know who he
quoted but he said what is true love
what is true love he said you know what
true love is
he says real true authentic love is
finding the song that's playing in
someone else's heart and singing it to
them when they have forgotten
it is
sometimes sometimes people forget their
own song but you have to be there you
have to be there in a way especially
with real songs and real music and
awaken that Spirit back up we suffered a
lot now we as a Jewish people suffered
tremendously and there are people not
every single person knows a person that
passed away through this virus and the
45 people in and the and of course
you don't want to sulk in the sadness
but it's an emotional
time but it's a time to sing within and
find the song within and to sing it also
to somebody else and find a way or
wherewith all to unify as one and
because when we sing that song together
no matter what song it is you could be a
spartic guy you can be whatever whatever
person you are whatever background you
have but when we sing together that's
when wants to bring us together in thees
to sing and everybody and by the way
what is harmony harmony is a different
song Right Harmony if you solo the
Harmony in a studio it's like what song
you singing But when you put it together
with the
melody that's when true Harmony come
together everybody has a different song
different background different in my own
household my father's faric my mother's
ASAS but when we sing that Melody
together it's the greatest Harmony in
the world so yeah just the amazing part
of that story I just think is you see
how brought this is his aunt asked if he
could visit this family um who love his
music and that's all the while he's
working on this album and this song kiat
who who wrote the song who wrote the
song and you're able to find who wrote
the song and you just see how piece by
piece by peace comes together and I
think I said this the last Amud in peace
we did maybe but if you like look at
your life maybe I don't know I feel okay
it's just so amazing yeah it's just so
amazing how especially when you say
stories and you're like well that's
crazy that that
happened this and that's just like
that's a life that's the life of a yid
who looks at their life and they're able
to see like getting from A to B to C to
D is not random it's just like it's so
there's so much divine presence in each
moment in the moment it feels random but
like you're like you're saying you look
back you look back and it's like whoa
that's I don't know who said it but
someone wrote every single person can
write a book in amuna every every single
person you just look at your life you go
write a book of auna cuz every moment a
lot a lot of times in retrospect and
that might be the itahara like in the
moment you can't notice it you can't be
like oh well this was right you know cuz
then we yeah it' be too easy if if we
knew it that's a really beautiful moment
okay another moment so you're talking
about getting a ticket on our way you it
wasn't with yakos shaki it was with ruen
Feinstein it was so I this is the next
most powerful moment that I want to
mention is is this moment this my mother
told many years later and I was not
going to question my mother and father
about the
situation uh they brought to
M but somehow we after my father was
dead already and what he we're talking
once about Lan about the town she said
you know why he made a mik because the
butcher came to him and told him
that that he can't live without a woman
can't live with his wife and so he's
going to go to the
shik so uh sha told
him uh wait two two weeks I'll have a
mik for you and he made the B house into
a
mik and about that and most of them not
extent something I don't know but but
that's how he thought he did but he
wouldn't use it
himself in fact I believe that not only
didn't he use it himself my mother could
have gone to the river and doing the SU
time but then people still think he went
there wow it's 8 years until they came
to R and then they got out
that's that's
a so in that moment um Reb Ruan like
very Sly like was telling us that the
story about his father and mother that
for 8 years they weren't together um
because because there was mkah issues
and because and the crazy part was that
Hally rosha found a way to make that
mkah fine but just on the the the small
chance that someone could see that re
that that rosha and his wife that like
oh they're going with a coola and he
didn't want that so and like he said
there was a river that that his mother
could have gone to but still for eight
years and that's why there was a giant
Gap between Reb David Feinstein re ruing
Feinstein and I don't know I just
thought it was so natural and real of r
ruing no he was so that whole experience
was was um well at first it was
completely scary frightening I was
scared to death yeah me too like I my my
heart yeah literally most episodes I'm
like nervous going into a little bit
then first two minutes I'm like okay
calm cool everything I there was a point
like I think 30 minutes into the ran
episode we took sort of like a bathroom
break like everyone everyone like walked
away and that and when when we got back
from that that was when I finally was
able to just like stay calm and but I
don't know there was something about
being in front of a godal and especially
because he looks like his father yeah he
looks very much he looks like ra he
looks like rosha and but this his voice
I didn't anticipate his voice to sound
like that you know I don't know why I
don't know what random I know but I
don't know why like you see like we have
the opportunity to see pictures of gyum
all day that are no longer with us
rarely do you have video footage of them
probably you know mem and whatever in 50
years 100 years people have videos of
gum now but like I don't know leab
shereba has a lot of videos of him but
like I don't know fin scene if there are
videos of him like I don't think there
of him talking right or even sheer him
like we don't Victor Miller we have so I
just found it very interesting I'm like
I wonder if OSHA's voice sounds like R
ruan's voice it's interesting there are
happens there are like there is footage
online of rosha I think MD arish I was
going to say is he arish cuz arish is
respons I know he's awesome m arish is
responsible for that but some like
incredible footage ofo putting on
filling Remo learning and it's it's like
it's it was a different world you know
they lived in the Lower East Side of
Manhattan you know and it's just like
the total world was coming out of the
Lower East Side like that's and today
what is what is the Lower East Side true
there's still people there but you know
what interesting I I think that's one of
the most popular answers then we ask
everyone who's one person from history
that's no longer with us you want to sit
with very often I think it's the most
common answer people say RHA Einstein it
is interesting that is interesting right
I think I think I think you happen to be
right I think most people do say that
it's
interesting we at amudim see all types
of addictions from gambling addiction
porn addiction sex addiction substance
abuse alcoholism these are things that
we sadly see a lot more than we would
like to but it's the unfortunate reality
of the times that we're in and therefore
we need to be able to provide whatever
help those that are suffering need you
know first it was prescription opiates
that he would buy from
people and then the summer of 2013 he
started using heroin addiction is
something that affects many people all
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