Vayigash: The Secret of Keeping Them Close

Three of the most dramatic words in the how could I take away from you that says his soul is bound up with his soul. My father's soul is connected to his youngest son so deeply. How could I how could I separate them balum he really gives a revelation I'm not one to talk much about parenting that's not not my field of expertise but the bum says this and really he says the fundamental of of everything everything that that parents really has to know and have to do and you can save a lot of money on on on lectures and seminars and classes if you learn this uses a mode called a technique called misra if there's a word that appears infrequently once once or twice. They're only here only there. So the bum connects the two words and he says if this word is here and this word is there elsewhere obviously it's a word that not doesn't appear very often. Each one indicates something about the other. So he says there's only one other place where we see the word kur in where the says the the foolishness is bound up in the heart of a soul that that a child is is drawn. He has an inclination to act stupid, right? Kids act silly, kids act dumb. That's just the nature of of how kids are. So it says Kuru over there and it says Kuru over here like Dr. Valum. That's where you see the same thing. The Baltw explains it from my perhaps the way you could understand this maybe a little differently. The connection that Baltw is making here through the through this technique called the Sagravel's now means that a child is born with the a kid has an inclination is naturally drawn and predisposed to do silly things. So the comes in the Bits really has legitimate time. He says there's somebody here. The is already here. The takes possession. The has already made himself at home. It's like somebody gives you a new apartment and you move into your new apartment the first day and somebody's on the couch, a squatter, he says, "I'm already here." That's what the exit might feel like. What's the answer to that? The answer to that to the foolishness with a person's natural inclination is the answer to that is connect with your children in [clears throat] a way that even though there's no yet they're already yours. They're not the because there's something stronger than the there's something that was there before the moment a child was born the child knows who its mother is. You're already there. So you become the squatter. You stay claim to this child's heart. be so connected and be so close with him that you're there for sure was saying can combat can encounter can push away could triumph over said that there was there was article one of the magazines and it was saying that it's very hard to raise kids today because it said um it used to be for a kid to to leave the system or to go after took a lot of courage took a lot of fortitude you're leaving you're turning your back on everybody and the writer was saying he was that that now it's not so card and he gave him a mush. He said some and somebody says you want to have we're making a minion. So he say no not really I'm here I'm enjoying the main course I'm good thank you he says but if you're walking through the lobby and you see a minion from starting and there's 50 people there it's inevitable that you're going to join because you're seeing so many people are doing this so I'm just going to do it. Suddenly your brain is telling you better join this meeting because you're going to be left out if you don't din even though a minute ago you didn't want to din when they asked you to come join the meeting. Think about it and everyone knows it's true. So he was saying it used to be for a child to turn their back on their parents on the system on yeshiva on a rabbi on a teacher on a counselor took a certain gut. So it was saying I'm stopping what I'm doing. Now it's happening all around you. So it takes strength to stay back and it seemed like a very strong argument. So I told to my I said what do you think of this argument? He said it's silly. I said why his example of my is very good. He says because there's one person who doesn't hear this whole thing doesn't speak to him. Not the person who says do you want to d mar and not do the minions for marav that's taking place. Who is that? Someone who already dar he doesn't even hear this conversation because he already mar he's checked out of the whole thing. Raise your children in a way that not this and not this. They know exactly where they are. They're good. They dare already. They're not looking for a mar. They have everything they need from their parents in their homes. Is the biggest antidote and the biggest preemptive strike against Now pajas.