Lech Lecha: Living With The Memory

Good evening, and welcome to our shiur. Dramatic encounter after the war, the Meloch S'dom comes out victorious, and they win. And the Meloch S'dom comes to Avraham Avinu, the big hero over here. And he wants to give him he wants to share the spoils. Avraham El Meloch S'dom, "How you may see Yadi El Hashem, I lift up my hands K'el Elyon im chutzpah tzoik na'al, I'm not taking from you, I'm not taking not as much as a string or a shoelace, nothing. I shouldn't be said Anochi he'er sharti es Avraham, I don't want you to say I made Avraham rich." What does it mean "How you may see Yadi?" Like Targum Onkelos famously Lashon shvu'ah, it's an oath. Mayrum ani es yadai l'Kel Elyon, like a person lifts their their hands when they make a shvu'ah, when they make a promise, when they make an oath. Avraham Avinu promised not to take anything, not to have any hana'ah, any pleasure from the spoils of war. Like Targum Onkelos, that's not what it means. V'yomer Avraham, "Hareimosi yadi b'Tzloi kodem Hashem." I raise my hand in t'fillah. I'm davening to Hashem, I'm not taking I'm not taking from you. But what's the t'fillah then? Says, "I'm lifting up my hands." Like Targum Onkelos, in t'fillah. "I'm not taking your money, I won't have any hana'ah from you." Then what's the t'fillah? What are we talking about? So the Heilige S'farno says that it was a t'fillah Avraham Avinu didn't want people to say, "Oh, you know how he got rich? From the King of S'dom after the war." There's no Kiddush Hashem in that. He wanted Kiddush Hashem. Avraham Avinu was on a mission in this world to teach the world as Seder Ha'Hishtalshelus of the world, right? That there's a God. So when somebody who's a Yerei Hashem gets rich, that's Kiddush Hashem. I'm giving ma'aser, you just gave ma'aser. Ma'aser makes you rich. Let people see that I got rich the way the Torah says to get rich, not that you made me rich. That was the t'fillah. Maybe Al Pi Yesod Ha'S'farno we could say something else. I heard this very chashuve a talmid chacham name is Meir Kravitz in South Fallsburg, in the Maggid Shiur in South Fallsburg. It's such a beautiful thought. Pasuk says in next week's parashah, when Avraham Avinu davened with the Meloch S'dom Avraham Avinu says, "I understand that I'm speaking to to the Ribono shel Olam, davening, but maybe it's somewhat maybe it's an audacity for me to to speak to you. Maybe it's for me to speak to you. Who am I? I'm dust and ash. Dr. Ashi I should have been destroyed. I should be ash. I should be completely dust by the by the kings and this expression about the war really by by nature I should be gone already, but I'm still here. I should have been ash. I didn't who tried to burn me. Never try to burn me. I'm still here. The kings try to kill me. I'm still here. But I should have been I'm dust and ash because really that's what I should have been. If not for your acumen that stands by me. That's what he says. So I may have said like this. Anybody who ever had a a moment in their life that they try to hold on to you marry off a child. So you find yourself it's a very special moment looking for videos in your phone to hold on to the moment of that night or a picture and everyone has that with different moments that they're trying to hold on to. People who experience a nice open revealed should [snorts] try to hold on to that inspiration. Try to remember. But what happens is we forget. We forget very quickly. The next day I look oh my gosh I had a nice. I'm never going to and then life gets in the way. I found video with the term in never to he lived with favor. You know why favor? Because I should be dead at least twice. The he lived with that awareness. So you know what the feeling was you have to I lift my hand and I let it never be said that anything I have in this world is from another human being. Let me never forget that it's just you. So that was all part of the perpetual of the perpetual enduring of was let me never forget that there is a creator in this world. Not for one moment, not for one second, not for one instant should I ever forget that but his grace, but his kindness I have nothing. I have nothing. I have nothing.