Ki Sisa: Where the Marriage Happens

Good evening. Thank you. Thank you. Like like you would write color a bride. When you finished the moment it teaches us that the title is written like Matana. The title is given to like a gift. Like a gift given to as a gift. There for the taking. So too was the title given to now. There's a lot of things that are perplexing about this but let's start with this. I can't not give them a gift. You can't take a gift. The father brings his daughter to a man and says here I'm giving you a gift it doesn't work. You have to do this condition. There's ways of to make that acquisition. It's a formal acquisition like anything else. It's the opposite of Matana. It's a gift. It's a it's a real formal acquisition. So what does it actually mean that a color is given to a husband? The Matana. So I should remember it like this. He said that although a slot of them in Jerusalem once told them something very deep. Very relevant. He said the all say on the passage of motion of you can buy stuff. The version of leads You can have the people who are alone by side to their homes. They should make for people. So the version of is the age of without them. He forces together. That means so to speak even if they don't want the version brings people a man and a woman together into marriage against their will. So this person that asked my what is it about them? Most people who you know get married very willingly very some of them are very excited very happy about it. They can't wait to get married. They are they make very a lot of money on gifts they're showing countdowns and clocks and signs that show I can't wait. 18 days 17 days 16 days. Oh my gosh how am I going to survive? And that's how it should be. You know it was endless time you know because he because he liked it. So so what does that mean that I said it was like that. He said he said such a powerful thing. He said that when a man marries a woman or a woman marries a man because they they like each other they don't like each other. They like each other for themselves. That means they're still really being motivated by self-interest. That means I like this woman. Meaning I think she'll make me happy. I think she'll be me she'll make me a better person. I think she'll she's a great cook and I'll enjoy the supper she makes. I'm not really I like her for me. And vice versa she's thinking the same thing about me. So he says we are in that. Do you see that they're giving themselves away to the other one. He says it's not in the marriage that is making this obvious like that. It's after the marriage when they discover things about each other that they didn't know were there. And they are maybe challenging or difficult and they have to learn to work with that thing. And that's the point of like that. This is my book. So I'm going to learn how to deal with it. So let's say my I married a woman who's a very neat and I'm not so neat. So I have to make myself over into a person that she can live with. That's not something I would have chosen but it's where the happens. The actual match the union takes place in that area that was difficult for you. Exactly the place where it wasn't so easy for you is exactly where it happens. I have to say you know what the Matana is? It's a gift. Not the marriage itself. That's a gift. That's that's the opposite of Matana. That's not a gift. It's the things you discover about each other that you didn't even know were there. Everybody who marries gets married thinks oh I know everything about my color I know everything about my husband and this. You know nothing about them. And then you get married and you discover all kinds of wonderful things about them and all kinds of neatness that they have. Things that are that make you very happy or things that you have to work to appreciate. Whatever the case is that's the Matana. Boom boom boom boom Matana. The version gave you this the version gave you all this stuff you didn't know you were getting that you got on top of that. That's where the Matana is happening.