Adar/Purim Katan/Joy: Why Didn’t Jews Lose Their Faith? Reb Akiva, Eli Wiesel, & the Rebbe

okay today's class is dedicated by SAR Mala Simon commemorating the yard site of her dear beloved husband yov Ben Simon also known as Jerry Simon the artsite on the fourth of Al and we will always remember the special catering service and the good delicious food of Jerry Simon Al shalam may he remain an eternal source of blessing and light and inspiration for you and the entire family and all of the Jewish people and thank you very very much today's class is also dedicated in honor of the birthday of Esther AIG Bas ra SAR on shushan cotton and that's my dear wife so happy birthday okay amen amen amen G thank you very much and actually oh it's my wife is starting a new class so if you think this class has any Merit wait till you go to the classro the person from which I receive most of my wisdom maybe all of my wisdom and my wife is beginning a class here in M every other Monday you have a flyer it's on the Tanya acquiring tools to live with your Nish discover the inner map of your soul to help you live with greater passion purpose and power it's going to be on 49 linkis link 49 linkr Drive in the home of malal foyer and that's going to begin Monday 9:45 a.m. all women and girls are invited there's a flyer on the beima for all the details this class we're going to explore the two aspects of life that uh every human being on this Earth deals with and that's pain and joy and we the two actually come together as we will see in a very very deep inexplicable mysterious and very profound and intimate way it's relevant I think always to life but especially today as is quite obvious and as what shall become obvious and it's of course very relevant to this time of the year the month of other especially this year two others we have a leap year and as we'll see the famous statement of our sages is that in other we increase in Joy what what is that supposed to mean how does one increase in Joy what does joy and happiness even look like and what if life is far from perfect bliss so let's begin we begin with the beginning of sh all the way in the beginning if somebody opens up a Shar that's the code of Jewish law literally Shar means a set table a prepared table and the reason is I don't have to explain it to this crowd but when you prepare a table a set table it means when people come in they can just sit down somehow some people think it happens on its own but they could just sit down and begin partaking in the feast so was meant to be that in other words if somebody goes back to the sources they can be very intricate and complex the was made to create a table that's set before you you so you could sit down and see all the platters and enjoy all the courses and begin consuming the healthy delicious food so was the objective was to create a set table organized structured that somebody can immediately digest and ingest in terms of the path of Jewish life has four sections the beginning is which means the path of life that deals with the daily conduct of a June if you open up Simon Al right away the first section the first section has 697 sections it's a lot Simon they're called Simon if you open up Simon Al so uh what's known as the footnote of thear was the rabbi of C in the 16th century and 17th century he begins this is how he begins was written BYO and his contemporary he was from and R known as was the rabbi of he lived in Poland he wrote the footnotes to the so he begins with these words which is actually a from says I have placed Hashem before me constantly says the this is a great principle in and in the in the Journeys in the ascents in the steps of of good people walking before hem why is this so important one can't compare the way they sit the way they move around the way they engage in life when they feel that they're alone they're isolated it's just me nobody else rather when the person knows they're in the presence and in the presence of the great Creator the ruler of the universe the way even a person speaks the way they open their mouth there's a difference when the person is alone or even with certain people and when the person is in the presence of the king so when a person realizes that Hashem whose presence fills the entire reality and the entire universe is standing right near the person and part of the person's life observing the human being so then it is a different a different way in which a person lives this is what we call Basic year Shay the basic knowledge that I can't hide from reality I can't hide from reality in other words I'm always in the presence of truth I'm always in the presence of authenticity which we call Hashem that'sit this is a quote actually from which is the R's guide to perp the Ra's Guide to the perplexed chap section three chapter 52 the is quoting the in the beginning of of of and then he adds amazing words says the opening of the don't be embarrassed from those who mock you those who are mocking me but they're mocking me because I'm doing the right thing because I know that I'm trying to serve God do not be embarrassed I guess he felt this should be in the beginning of because it's one of the hardest things in life social pressure Conformity I'm trying I need to please people I need everybody to agree to everything I say or do so she say say you have to develop a spine you have to know who you are and not be ashamed from doing the right thing and being connected to the truth that's the beginning of now we're going to go to the end of the meal and I know I'm skipping 696 sections and you'll forgive me because the class does have to have an end time so I'm skipping all the way to the last section of sim 697 97 and that's actually the laws of because goes in the order of daily ritual so it starts with waking up and washing your hands and the morning rituals and then ultimately the anding ETC BR and then it goes continues with the laws of shabas and the laws of Y but Y is also starts withes with every month and then it goes through the holiday so it goes through PES all the way down suus and you have because that's the end of the year we start from this and we end with other but p is every year is only when there's a leap year it's called a small porm like this year which is a leap here 5784 so the last section of deals with the laws of because that's like the last holiday in the calendar and it's not even every year how does the Rama end so he says some say that there is an obligation to increase in feasting and Joy on the 14th day of the first ad this is the opinion of the tour in the name of it's an obligation to have a sud just like we have a meal we should have a Pon meal and joy this year it's not initi because it's shabas but this is talking about even if it's not on sh this is an opinion of is Friday oh sorry okay I stand corrected I got confused cuz my wife's birthday is so I was thinking about shabas okay good error not such a bad error you're right sorry so it's actually relevant every year so he says but that's not the that's not the custom even though it's an opinion at least you should increase at least a little bit to have an more of a Suda more of a joyous festive meal in order to fulfill the view of those who are stringent what he means here by stringent those who say that we should have a meal and feast so at least you should add a little bit and there finishes with these words you can ask just because some people say it but you say that's not the minic others say there's no obligation to have a sud he says no still even though it's not Dominic do it anyway and he said says is a quote from M from Proverbs a good heart is always feasting or in simple English is always parting if you have a good heart M you're always ready for a mish you're always ready for a state of feasting so that's why if I'm you're going to add in your and in your that's how he finishes a so there's something now very interesting if we look at the beginning and at the end okay there's something fascinating we have an expression the end is connected to the beginning it says in the beginning and the end are always connected so the the 900 the 697 sections are sandwiched between Al the beginning and at the end and in both of them he uses the word Ted he begins with Ted and he ends with Ted so uh one of the great known as he was from Italy and World traveler and wrote many many works so he writes he's known as so he writes in one of his and it's brought in other others he says take a look in we say it every day tell the jewi peopleit every day the Jews offered in the an offering in the morning and in the evening a lamb in the morning a lamb in the afternoon in the evening and it's called the carbon tamid carbon Ted means the consistant Perpetual offering because it was brought seven days a week every single day 365 days a year Sunday through shabas called the carbon T so it was the constant carbon it was a sheep in the morning and a sheep in the evening so it's every day they were two a t in the morning and a t before they closed up shop in the B it was the last thing they would do the beginning was the Ted and the end was the Ted it's called carbon Ted and that's why we have the daving and the morning shakas and then and then was added because of the remains of the carbon that were often burning at night because the M was too full during the day so they would continue it at night that's why may initially was instituted as something voluntary so says now you'll understand the depth of what the saying we begin with t and we end with t just like in the bikes there was the T in the morning and the T as the last carbon so the which was written in Exile and includes the laws during G doesn't include the laws of the also has those two so the begins with t t I place Hashem before me always T it's not some days yes some days in some days yes some days off there's vacation there's winter breaks and how does he end t a good heart is always feasting it's not you're feasting Sunday afternoon shabas afternoon you're always ready for a good party Ms like you if have a good heart now it's interesting these two are very different nature the first one could sound some could sound I hope it's not going to be at the end of the class but it could sound somewhat stressful you know this king is always here you know all the video cameras are zooming in on you 24 24/7 don't think you can get away with anything every moment at the end it's much more relaxing but says what saying is that all of is sandwiched in between these two just like in the all of the all the service during the day was sandwiched between the two so the whole daily a and work of the Jew every Jew is in between these two book ends so to speak that hold them together and what hold them together is and the are they opposite the two Lambs were not opposite they complemented each other in fact they were both Lambs this is the beginning and this is the end and they're both T they're not something that I can afford to detach from just like a person can't stop breathing just because I breathed yesterday or I had a drink yesterday so I'm not going to drink with oxygen it's even more I need it constantly so this is something that is the oxygen of a the spiritual oxygen and emotional oxygen of a person's life in order to appreciate what this means let's go to the next step the next source which is the F fourth Source this is tractus says the the son of the son of said in the name of just as when the month of of enters one decreases diminishes in and joy the same way when other enters one increases in Joy now the fact that you say increases it means doesn't say when other comes you should become happy it means happiness is a Natural State that's why says you don't need a special reason in there means ra RAV means more extra an extra abundance and dosage of Joy what is interesting is that ju Theos he says just like kame it seems like two completely opposite he should say when of comes in you incre decrease in joy in contrast when other comes in you increase in Joy obviously of and other here represent two Polar Opposites of is the month when we commemorate galus Exile destruction so it's a time of mourning and grief with all of the rituals and customs of the month of of till the climax TSH which is the most severe fast of the year after Yer which is of course from the T and other is on the contrary it's the month of jubilation of celebration of feasting highlighted by purm and even PM as we saw but he says kame just like it's almost like the two are connected they grow out from each other like just like you do this you do this who it's not just like it's a completely different mindset completely different attitude sadly a completely different experience and yet he doesn't only say it together he says kame just like this it's not just like this it's a very very different it's a whole different it's different Behavior it's different experience there's a story in gamar it's in another tracted it's called Mak it's the last page page 24 D it's a story about four of the greatest sages who lived in the era following the destruction of the second B mikdash in fact they were they were alive during the second B mikdash they watched its destruction and decimation and these four of the greatest sages of the time were traveling towards Rome why they were traveling to Rome the gor doesn't say they lived in ER Isel they were traveling towards Rome it could be to try to help their brothers to try to negotiate with the Roman Emperor to try to meet with the senate or for another reason that we don't know the gar doesn't discuss their destination it discusses their journey and here it is this is your fifth Source in the source sheets Ru RAB AKA are all traveling on the road M they're on a track they're on a voyage they hear from a distance of 120 kilm a mill is approximately a kilometer so they are 120 kilom away from Rome but they can hear they can hear the voices the sounds of celebration of parting you know that the Romans especially in that era have perfected the skill of parting the especially the noblemen and the Caesar and the emperor and the people in the Senate and all the dignitaries they had abundance of slaves working for them and they knew how to throw a party the amount of food and wine and promiscuity and the lights that they had if you're familiar a little bit with Roman history this has been perfected and this is what they heard they hear from 100 20 kilm away and this is before there were sound systems and speakers and mics remember this is approximately the year 80 90 after the Common Era right after the and they can hear the is they can hear the excitement the enthusiasm the passion and what do they do they start crying yesu they all start crying RAB AKA who was Notorious for laughing when other people were crying he's m m literally means in yish you would call it quelling he's quelling he's laughing he's happy you could see this man is feeling happiness so they look at him they say can you tell me can you tell us please what is so funny what are you so excited about a good Jew doesn't answer questions a good Jew aners a question with another question how do I know that because was a good Jew he says to them why are you crying you're asking me why I'm laughing maybe you tell me why you're crying they say to him why are we crying they say look here are nations here are people here is a whole nation they bow down they prostrate themselves to Pagan Idols they're burning incense to idolatry their behavior and conduct is promiscuous and immoral they're sitting with security they're sitting with Serenity they're enjoying life from the word still they're enjoying and we the house of Hashem called B the house which represented the foottoo the foot stol of God in this world the epicenter that manifests the in the world it's Up in Flames so you don't want us to cry you expect us not to cry when we see the contrast he said to them now you know why I'm laughing and he says if this is the Bliss that's being experienced by by those who transgress his will they forgo his will so you can only understand how much more will the pleasure will the serenity will the joy and festivity be for those who are committed to his will for those who fulfill his will and that's the end of the story that's what RAB AKA said to them and that's all we know of the story the way most people and many commentators understand the story is the RAB AKA is saying you know why I'm laughing because I'm thinking if this is the reward if this is the benefit that Rome is receiving just a matter IM what our party is going to look like one day just imagine what our festivities are going to look like one day if this is what this moral degenerate people who destroyed the who destroyed so much of the Jewish people who are committed to every uh deviant behavior that we abore and nonetheless they're getting all this pleasure why wow so I can just imagine that's why I'm laughing that's the simple basic understanding of how you would understand the story but this raises quite a few questions first of all is you know we're still waiting 2,000 years for this party that RAB aiva is describing why is he laughing now they're crying now because they're seeing the contrast RAB AA is saying you know one day one day we're going to have a big party okay we'll all laugh at the moment but he's already laughing right now so you might say had such a good imagination such a good imagination that he can already feel the Vibes of that party but it's still difficult to understand there AA is already now which brings us to the next question why are they getting such rewards R AA is saying you think this is a prize wait till you see the real prize this is this is G why why are they getting any price they're crying because they're seeing the contrast R AA says we're going to get a much much bigger and better why are they getting anything which brings us to the next question and that it is almost sounds like the is saying is you see what they have this is amazing but wait till you see what we have in other words he's saying whatever they have we're going to get one day but with much more quantity and with much more quality it's almost like you could understand thata is comparing the Jewish reward to the Roman reward it's just going to be of a completely different magnitude was that really what he's saying that the Jewish version of Messiah the Jewish version of redemption is this party that you seeing but a completely different level you think this is a is board wait till you come to my you'll see what AOG board is you think this is a vienes table I'll show you what a VI table is $200,000 later you think these are flowers it's a garnish this is a bar is that what really saying would seem could be completely of a different realm but let's go even more into the story they asked AA why you laughing that makes sense I can understand that you hear what's happening in Rome everybody they all knew what Rome represents these were the Jewish leaders of the time reab Yeshua was one of the he was a Ley he was one of the vocalists in bikes the says was one of the you know they had a daily conto in the bikes with the carbon Ted in the morning and in the evening it wasn't just an offering there was a whole musical presentation you can have up to 120 vocalists and musicians in the bikes andu was one of them so he was in the bikes was considered the N he was the spiritual leader he was like the NSI of the Sanhedrin the spiritual leader of the Sanhedrin and then you had the other two aarya was one of the greatest sages and of course RAB AA so they're crying they're crying RAB AA is laughing they ask him why you're laughing I think that question makes a lot of sense so Raba could just tell them why he's laughing so I made a joke before that Jews answer questions with questions but why if I don't know what to say I I ask you a question you know let's just prolong the conversation they asked him a good question could have said if this is what the Sinners are getting wait to see what the good guys are going to get if this is what Hashem is ready to give these guys I'm excited cuz I know what the good guys are going to get he says no why are you crying and did he really not know why they're crying I think everyone can understand why they're crying RAB Akiva certainly can understand why they're crying was this a rhetorical question was it just to prolong the conversation obviously was trying to get to something he can only explain why he's laughing after they explain explained why they're crying how we supposed to understand that it seems like for AA to answer his question which seems like a very straightforward answer wait till you see the real party wait till you see what it looks like when we get the when we get the goods when we get the the benefits it seems like to explain that he first has to talk to them about their tears and then there is a little technical detail why doesn't just say it simple simply he uses an interesting term those who go P the will means like means to [Music] like yeah surpass or pass over those who pass over his will to those who do his will could have said if this is what the are getting meaning what Wicked people are getting certainly what good people people are going to get he uses an interesting expression those who pass over the will and those who are the truth is that there is a very very profound uh meditation and reflection that's transpiring in this story raka is laughing now re is not saying when Messiah comes and the Gul comes then I'm going to start laughing he's M now when the when thead were getting nothing is in Flames he's M now because what was happening at the moment was RAB AA was not just talking about the future of course he was talking also about the future but he was explaining the present in the context of the future and to appr appreciate this and this becomes quite a profound reflection there is a MIM a discourse from the from the Al he has a actually this week's and he explains the story and reveals a different layer of depth to the exchange between RAB aiva and his colleagues I want to read it with you inside it's it's very very profound words extremely profound but we're going to try to Dem mythologize the abstractions did you understand what I just said okay thank you and uh and bring it down to our level and to our nervous system so the balatan says this the second to last Source sheet P what meant was this if there is so much pleasure in the world of of those who transgress the will all the Bliss that they find in this world where did all this Bliss come from it descended and it became physical and material into the bruteness of this world that's what the Romans find pleasurable so there's a pleasure they're touching and it came down and it became Corporal it became nashim from the word gash it became crash and brute and for this to happen it couldn't evolve and develop the way that levels come down and descend from the infinite light level after level like you have in Holiness all the levels that are a reflection of the Divine Light descending to one level another level they had to fall down they had to go through a Quantum Leap they had to fall from the highest mountain down into says to the deepest Abyss to be able to become these types of Pleasures from the source of pleasure they had to go through a metamorphosis that is not a gradual descent but a complete break away from the source it's called AIC when somebody Falls and and you know they body gets shattered and that's why it's called means it passes over it moves away from the will if those who are living in that world yes still in their mind they have so much pleasure all the pleasure that fell in a process known as the breaking of the vessels so those who are what mean not just those who fulfill his will all that which is made by the will it's crafted by his will it's developed by his will it's the way energy descends in Holiness whether it's in the higher ganade and the lower ganade where there is divine Bliss so it's a completely different level of bliss an infinite type of because he's the source of life and the source of Ty the source of bliss of delight of Joy what what is the alter what is the balat teaching here one of the contrasts between between paganism and Judaism is in paganism the concept of sacrifices was you have to sacrifies yourself to appease the gods because the Gods in Pagan are always competing for resources the god of the son is jealous of the god of the wind the god of the wind is jealous from the god of the water the god of the water is jealous of women and women are the god of the femininity jealous the god of masculinity and Heaven is jealous from Earth and everyone is in a crazy war and you got to find your God invest in the biggest bully appease him as many sacrifices as you can get him on your good side so you will be blessed in Judaism there the exact opposite idea we call hasem infinity infinity means the word a Infinity means it includes everything because if it doesn't include everything it's not infinite So when you say means Ina and is the word for is not God or even AEM it's usually ins because ins means it includes all of reality if there's any reality outside of a then it's not a a means there's no there's no limit so that means every experience of reality is part of the A and everyone exists in reality there's no resource available outside of reality that means all the pleasure in the world all the Bliss in the world all the love in the world all the goodness in the world anything you would identify as good gak pleasurable delightful Blissful all of it is from One Source it's all from the a it's all from that source of infinity that includes all of reality and because Hashem is the source of all pleasure that's why there could be pleasure in the world if the world was just a random mistake a random mutation if we were just infantes blimps on the surface of infinity inconsequential particles of dust that are barely noticeable that just came about through a bunch of Lucky mistakes right if that was the case Consciousness and pleasure would be very very difficult to comprehend it's what many struggle with in the world of science because where does Consciousness come I mean if you have a blind uh mindless heartless cell even evolving after 26 billion years where did love and pleasure and Consciousness emerge from but of course behind all of existence there's Consciousness behind all of existence there's love behind all of existence there's Bliss there's pleasure and that's why it can exist in the world that's why yes our cells carry that our souls carry it Consciousness carries that we have that in the human experience but there's basically he says two types of Pleasures there's the the pleasure that they were watching in Rome and it made them cry what was that pleasure that pleasure uses the word all pleasure comes from but what is that pleasure there's the pleasure he says that comes in the way of kadus and there's the pleasure that comes in the way of Neila what does it mean nefil somebody's walking it may be walking down a slope you know you go on a hike your mountain climbing you're going down take step after step those of you who live at some point you may be into hiking or you were into hiking or you are into hiking and you know you have to be careful you got to watch The Rock You got to take the step and you can go down from a very very tall mountain in kakad or bare mountains or wherever you choose but you have to be careful as you go down what's the somebody comes to a cliff and fall off falls off the person on the after the fall is not the same person on top of the Fall a person could break bones you drop something yeah you drop a k and it's shattered into pieces you can't recognize the original anymore there's the way the hashem's pleasure is manifested M the way it comes down and it's a reflection of its source but then there's the way it goes through a nefa it goes through a fall it goes from the top highest Place into the lowest place it's still fragments of pleasure but it's completely not recognizable and Associated and linked and aligned with the original pressure he calls it a process of literally means the breaking of vessels in this is a very very big topic how there's the world of the world of chaos where there was there was a Breaking of the vessels what does it mean a Breaking of the vessels when you have a vessel and it's broken and it's shattered and suddenly you're left with fragments every fragment of the vessel has something of the K there right imagine you have a word and then you separate the letters b flying letters when the letters come together they represent an idea B bless it when the letters are broken I take a base it's still part of bar but I don't see the connection with the oness because I have B I have I have have the whole world is hashem's letters the DNA of the world is divine letters but means the letters are separated there scattered so I cannot see the cohesiveness all I'm experience is all I'm experien is fragmentation so as a result of that the pleasure of the a that is manifested in Rome that's manifested in the that's manifested in the ne is of a completely different type of pleasure it's pleasure that basically is not connected anymore in a revealed way in a manifested way it's not expressing anymore the source that's the spiritual idea that bat explains elsewhere in the first day of creation there was water what happens on the second day says let there be a firmament in the water and separate the water so now there's higher water and lower water so there's the water on top of the heaven and there's the water below the heaven what does that really represent water is a metaphor for pleasure water in is the spiritual flow of bliss of energy is the flow of water is a metaphor for Ty for pleasure before day two all the water was one there's only one source of bliss the only source of bliss is the source of bliss there's only one source of bliss it's the source of all Oneness it's the source of all love it's a source of all pleasure what happens on Monday is there's a split in the water this higher water and lower water higher water is the pleasure that's still associated with its source the lower water is the water that came down but there's a there's a there's a firmament separating it from the higher water which means it tells you that I will give you Bliss even though it's not connected in a revealed way to the source because of that that pleasure is a very very very skin deep it has a superficiality to it it's more of a distraction than it is bliss and the reason is very simple I mean not simple to understand not so simple to implement when the pleasure is associated is connected to the source so then it's authentic because it's representing real Bliss real Bliss is that you're one with with the source of all reality which is which is bliss Hashem is the source of all T when there's Detachment from that in my own perception so now the pleasure is coming I'm looking for pleasure but there's only one source of pleasure so what what what what do I do so what has to happen now is and this is the tragedy of all Addiction in the world and not just addiction all pleasure that is not really pleasure it's distraction and that's the key difference there is Ty and there's distraction now distractions are big trust me they feel very pleasurable distractions basically say it's going to feel good right now so if I can give a very mundane example there's many more but I'm going to give a very mundane example when I'm standing in front of a delicious piece of cheesecake cheesecake is not good for me it's really not good for me first of all there's diabetes in my family that's for one and then other reasons as well 2 hour an hour late I'm in a bad mood I'm in a depression I have anxiety I'm whatever but that's not what the cheesecake says the cheesecake doesn't say I am anxiety I am depression you have diabetes the cheesecake says eat me and you're going to be happy you're going to be good you're going to be happy that's what it says okay its power is usually before you eat it it's power is Temptation the power is the commercials the advertisements but the same is true with almost any distraction in life there's only one source of real pleasure now the truth is every soul on a soul is a the body is a vehicle for the soul they're not two separate things the body is the the soul is the in the the says in truma I will dwell not in it in them should have said in Hebrew grammar so the say in each person there's the physical but there's the of each person that's where the is when I remove the blockages when I open up my body and my nervous system my brain my animal conscious my body to my soul the soul naturally is one with the source and the source is full of bliss so pleasure and joy is the innate organic space of a soul that's living without blockages and coverups pleasure is not something I create by pursuing someone or something pleasure is simply going back to the pristine state of Oneness of akos where there is a flow of love and a flow of pleasure but it's hard because my body my brain my amigdala my nervous system circumstances life's events and so on and so forth creat so many other types of experiences I'm not in touch with that natural flow but when I am in touch there is bliss and there's no Bliss that can compare to it in the world because all Bliss that is not that is simply counterfeit it's like counterfeit pleasure how can the Bliss that's detached from The Source sell itself it sells Itself by saying here I will give you happiness but because it's not rooted in the source of Happiness it's always short-lived so before I do it it's very tempting while I do it I'm telling myself it's tempting usually I already know that it's a disappointment but I can't admit it yet so I'm telling myself it's delicious and an hour later boom and I always need something new I always need something new cuz by definition it's a distraction and because it's a distraction today it worked tomorrow I need another distraction another distraction another distraction and Humanity has created a very impressive infrastructure of distractions to no end but at the end each of them is skin deep and disappointing in a deep place because anything that's not embodying the source of pleasure the only source of pleasure is going to be counterfeit it's going to be a forgery it's going to be a cover up it's going to look promising it's like the ponai schemes you remember the big panai game that somebody did a few years ago is this also counter spiritual pleasure like learning a lot of course any you see any form of pleasure that is rooted in ego right any form of pleasure that's rooted in disassociation and isolation and disconnection is going to have to create a fake feeling of bliss to compensate for the fact that it's not rooted in one and when we can internalize this this is a life-changing this is a life-changing teaching if we can internalize this it doesn't mean it's always easy sometimes you know people have crushes on other people people have crushes sometimes it goes on for years what are they looking for they're looking for something there's a void there's a void I'm lonely I don't feel loved and I feel if I can only have a connection with this person or a connection with this thing and for some people it's an outright addiction but many of us are not addicts but we all experience this at least I experience this and the reason is because the other alternative requires real real real authenticity and vulnerability and that's what all AEM is a hasem means to choose every moment real Bliss over counterfeit Bliss counterfeit Bliss is sometimes far more accessible sometimes looks very powerful but because it's rooted in separation it creates an illusion of bliss that is disconnected to the source so it has to sell itself and it does and it's most powerful thing is the promises it gives but everybody knows that a few minutes later or a few weeks later or a few days later you don't have to usually wait so long if you're honest with yourself it's this is not working say now I go to the next one and the next one and the next one and the next one on until at some point hopefully I Surrender I Surrender and I'm like I'm done I'm done looking for Bliss in counterfeit places and counterfeit relationships and it's expressed in billions and billions of different ways for some people it's a phone for some people it's a computer for some people it's websites for some people it's food for some people it's binging for some people it's alcohol it's drugs it's gambling and for some people it can be things that look productive and they are productive in the context of Truth but for me it may just be an escape since I'm in an isolated place since I'm detached I need things to make me feel good so this is called the pleasure in a world where there is Brokenness where we're not experiencing the Oneness but we still want person can't live without a sense of hope and pleasure and comfort that's what every infant is looking for I need attachment I need connection that why baby what is the baby crying for give me that tenderness give me that love give me that nurture and then when I grow up I have to decide what is going to give me pleasure in life and whenever I'm rooted in a world and in a reality that is detached from the source so I look for Pleasures that can keep me in isolation but still they will be good distractions that will make me feel good at the moment but they will never make me feel good at the M they'll make me feel good at the they'll never really make me feel good because they are not reflecting true reality so when truth surfaces comes back to the surface I need another distraction it's always more potent than the previous one so this Ty is a different type of pleasure it looks called Ty but it's really not how does one know the difference between the two one knows it as follows in the pleasures that are counterfeit Pleasures that represent themselves as Pleasures it's always changing before I do it it's unbelievably promising as I told you while I do it I'm convincing myself it's promising after I do it at some point I'm empty I'm empty because my eye has not truly been fulfilled it's not really what my eye is looking for or my eye needs it's based on the separ ation of my eye from the truth of the eye which is all want us and a pleasure that's feeding to that external superficial forged version of Self in real Bliss in real pleasure before I may have to work on it I may have to be disciplined but before I know that I'm touching truth in Middle you're experiencing authentic truth and afterwards one is filled with that because it's not a forgery it's not counterfeit yeah yeah o yeah they say there's always an ah and an oi the question is what comes first is it like o but then it's ah or it's like ah ah and then it's O there's always an A and an i it can get very tricky because you have people for example who exercise seven hours a day exercise is a wonderful thing and it's very very important but if it's a distraction right like I once told somebody you should go to the gym not because you hate your body but because you love your body if it's a distraction because I hate myself and I need everyone should compliment me right that's not going to be a blissful experience the same is true somebody who may learn and learn and learn and learn and learn and become more religious than the rest of the world but it's rooted in a sense of inner shame and guilt and inadequacy so the Bliss that I'm getting it may actually be something that's really really beautiful and really really good but it could be what they call toxic positivity and the reason is because I'm in a position where I'm not even open to the real light of it the gamor says that sometimes T can become for certain people Sam a poison there's a medicine that if you take it some people take it it saves their lives and other people it's damaging how can you say that about T it's not the T it's how I'm processing it what's happening in my life sometimes a person is doing tremendous amount of right and it's incredible and it's amazing and the people that benefit from it are forever grateful but what if the person internally is doing it only to get validation because they could never sit with themselves they always have to be on the run I always have to be responding to another call so at night I could tell myself I'm a needed person the world needs me I have value now this is something that's very unconscious I may have learned as a four-year-old that the only value I have in this world is if I could make myself needed to the rest of the world and I could feel that I'm selfless so my selflessness is using very holy ideas but it's really rooted in a very deep Scar and a very very deep wound it's also usually I'm going to resent it afterwards because I don't know how to say no and I it's very hard even and S sometimes such people have a very hard time with their closest relationships they're Heroes for the world but there's no exclusivity and intimacy because I can't really sit with myself I don't know how to be with me I remember I once heard from Dr twerski I remember Rabbi Abraham TW okay and he said that he was having health issues and the doctor told him he needs to go to a spa and sit in a hot bath for 30 minutes so he said great I'll take a magazine I'll take a newspaper today you take a phone right you don't have to sit with yourself even for a second he said no no no no the point is you got to sit in the bath without anything without anything so he said he went in and the first two minutes it was Bliss you know the hot water the warmth it was massaging was a great feeling and then afterwards he said it was the hardest half an hour in his life remember you can't even check your WhatsApp imagine there was a time that you I was sitting and I couldn't check my WhatsApp imagine the gehna that people lived with for 5,000 years today it used to be a place I'm not going to tell you which place it was called a private place in it's called B that's what you call it B that's the way calls a bathroom B right it was it's called private place today you answering emails it's an office I tell people bring in your desk already bring in a computer bring in a desk what do you have to leave what do you have to leave go from the shower to the bath to the B just stay there make it big put in a Jacuzzi just put in your table bring in your kitchen already bring in your bed if you want so Dr Twi said something very interesting he realized after half an hour that the worst person for him to spend time with was himself he said a CH it was an Awakening for him he said what is it about me that I find so miserable to be in my company am I such a bad guy and then he realized that he constantly he constantly needed that feedback that validation so he woke up 4 in 4:00 in the morning he wrote 90 books I'm sharing what he said publicly this is not humili he feels very open yeah he would talk a lot about this in every person's life in every person's life the soul doesn't need validation the soul engages in T and and love because that's what it is it's organically filled with love so there's full presence there and there's also boundaries because if I'm a hero to the world but I don't know how to be there for my spouse or for my children that's not great heroism right it's not great heroism it's basically I'm looking for this validation that type of and it may be very subtle and very unconscious and also very sweet this is not a judgment on people this is if I never learned the language of my n if I never made my soul my best friend and I may have never known how to CU if I'm not in Safety and Security if my body is anxious if I'm always alert for danger if I can't relax so then that's the bik Up in Flames so therefore I disconnect I cannot feel the inner flow of bliss which is the natural state of a soul when it is channeling the a which is a source of all pleasure so when a person says what what what is pleasure what is bliss it's never a pursuit of something it's never I'm going to go there I'll be happy you know how that works out when I get to the vacation destination all anxiety will disappear good luck tell me how that worked out for you that's always I'm running away to another distraction it may be a beautiful distraction and everybody should go on vacation and enjoy vacation and have beautiful vacations but I was once in a in a in a third I was once in Nicaragua Nicaragua so I was with my wife we were on a Jeep and my children and we went by a home to describe this as a home especially if you live in Muny I don't know I don't know if you know if it had one bedroom everybody was outside a whole day it was a little little hot it was caved in if it had one bedroom that was a kitchen and a bedroom and a dining room and a living room and a porch it was already large and there were a bunch of kids outside with the mother all sitting outside think she was sewing and they were playing they were climbing trees talk about a phone or a computer there it's like three would look like 2,000 years ago and uh my wife looked at them and she said and do you think that all of us who have big homes are necessarily happier you know sometimes a big home is a beautiful thing to have if there's peace in the house it's amazing it's incredible and if not you can give me 17 bedrooms and a tennis court and a basketball court three pools and three jacuzzi plus 50 acres of forest around it where nobody gets close not like these days where everybody's building everywhere and there's an emptiness you walk into the house there's an emptiness and when the hearts are open so then we could sometimes live in a very small place and it may there may be struggles I'm not here romanticizing poverty but there is an energy that is connected to the fact that people are truly connected somebody once said why is it that when people get angry at each other they often start yelling they start instinctively screaming and yelling you're in a room it's a small room why you screaming why are you screaming I hear you I'm not deaf the answer is we may be physically close but emotionally we're distant so I'm screaming cuz I want you to hear me you're sitting here but you're not here so my soul says scream maybe he'll hear maybe she'll hear because emotionally I know you're not hearing me but look at the opposite said when two people are in a room and their hearts are flowing towards each other then they'll speak low sometimes they'll whisper and sometimes they don't even say anything they just take a look at each other and that's enough why cuz you don't have to speak you certainly don't have to yell because you know the person is right here and if you're right here I'm not yelling so this is not a physical reaction it's a spiritual reaction in every situation in life I always have to choose which pleasure I'm going to go towards am I going to go towards the Ty which is rooted in the Soul's connection to Infinity which is the only real source of pleasure or I may not be ready for that I may not be aware I may not even know of anything else let's face it somebody who doesn't who grew up and doesn't understand any of this it's not their fault they need distractions I need to feel good about me whatever that means more sensitive people I'll tell you I heard this from Dr tski too more sensitive people I asked him what did you learn from 60 years of dealing with addicts and he told me these words he said that it's usually the most sensitive among ones the most sensitive Among Us who become the greatest addicts because they cannot deal with the fake Pleasures they cannot deal with not having a spiritual core so they have to go crazy and distract themselves with Insanity to be able to feel better about themselves but I don't want any of us to think that we're now talking about that group called addicts cuz I'm the healthy one cuz I have not been labeled as an addict we're not talking we're talking also about addict but we're talking about the inside every single one of us it's that choice of going into the place where as puts it there's a flow from the and that's a definition of real kadha kadha means that the pleasure is Flowing from the source and on every level it's a manifestation of that Oneness which is not kadha is there's an interruption and there's a breakdown in communication and now the pleasure says I will give you Bliss without connection with the source and that will always always disappoint and I would say 5,000 years Humanity has attempted to change this rule we have invented everything we're still inventing things to be able to substitute the real pleasure for the sake pleasure to give a new definition for pleasure outside ofus outside of intimacy with Hashem there's only one challenge it can't happen because there's no such a thing there's no such a thing it hasn't been invented yet artificial intelligence also won't be able to invent that type of pleasure these can only be Sensations at a moment which are distractions and the distractions may be big and Grand I can even run way to New Zealand for 6 months but it's all going to come crashing down because it's not rooted in reality it's not real and because it's not real therefore it's always using coverups to make me feel that pleasure it's based on the it's based on the Brokenness of the vessels comes Raba Nowa was saying they RAB AKA is laughing saying why are you laughing so before we get to them crying gives that line what's that's the means you went away from the doesn't only mean people who do his will it's something deeper means anything that's crafted by the will anything that's represented ing The Source the will and the pleasure of that's it's tuning in to the pleasure that's connected to the source it's connected to the will it's connected to the passion to the love that's at the source of creation means I pass over the R I create a new deviant deviant is that a word a deviant a deviation a deviant form of bliss not flowing from the rutson not flowing fromus not flowing from with the if this and look how Rome is enjoying they think they have an amazing life of course they're distracting themselves every night with new women and with new drinks and with new zus we're not going to describe what happened in Rome and with new with new Gladiators and with new cruelty and with every day they had something else the Bliss that they experienced ciglia I think hired a horse be in the Senate I mean they came up with quite interesting stuff those Roman emperors I don't know if you ever saw or read about the parties of the Germans the SS and the Nazis during the war they had these feasts and parties the best wine beautiful you know the way the Germans knew how to celebrate and when you look at the pictures of the videos they look you know on top of their game and that's Whata was seeing and AKA is saying you know I'm laughing now I'm not laughing I'm laughing now because if you want if you want to understand my pleasure I'm going to ask you why you crying they tell them why they're crying they're crying because look at theik so is saying if you want if for me pleasure means if a me pleasure means detaching myself from the B Mikes that's a counterfeit pleasure I'm not going to do that for a moment RAB AA is saying if pleasure means you look at some pleasure you look at those parties of the SS the falsehood the cruelty this the the the law the superficiality of it says that's what you that's what you want me that's what you want me to be jealous of if I have to give up the bikes in order to have this pleasure it's not worth it if you could tell me forget the bik go to Rome and party that's that's broken Brokenness within Brokenness within Brokenness it's because the pain of the cuz you're rooted in truth you're looking for truth you're looking for EMS you're looking for authenticity if I have to give up Truth For Pleasure what type of pleasure is are going to be if those who went away from the can experience such can experience such Bliss such fake Bliss imagine if you're tuning into the source of it if this is what fake pleasure looks like what does real pleasure look like there was a big the B name was of pish so he once said that of the balius of those who are addicted to materialistic hedonistic Pleasures would know the Ty the Bliss of godliness they would let go of all their Tas and they would run after elus after godliness I once told this to somebody who was who knew how to enjoy life on some level so he tells me obviously Theo didn't understand what physical Pleasures are cuz if he would he would have never said such a thing I told him obviously you don't understand what's real Bliss looks like cuz you can't even understand what he's saying that's Whata is saying everything Rome has is broken billions and billions and billions and billions of times because it's so divorced from the source and still look how much power they think there is there now imagine if you experience the EMS of that it's not was saying our party is going to be bigger you think they have spear ribs I'll show you our spear ribs when Judaism becomes about coping Roman Pleasures but we know how to really throw The KES or make a or eat you're missing the whole point is not saying we're going to have the real party you're talking about a different realm you're talking about EMS versus she you want me to be jealous of this type of it's I'll never give up real truth you want me to give up this pain to be able to have this Bliss this pain is coming from authenticity it's coming because I'm connected it's coming because I'm looking for truth and in that place it's a whole different type of pleasure it's a whole different type of bliss that which is that which is molded it's a manifestation of the of of theen of the of the Bliss of of a he says that's inates that's that's you're touching now you're touching truth all truth is infinite anything that's not infinite is not truth because if it's truth it means it's from the source of Truth source of Truth is infinite so you're touching something infinite it's never going to stop it's never going to end it's never going to cease and anyone who did this work and their soul even experienced that for a moment you know right away there's no substitute for it there's nothing that gets close to it yes there a lot of interesting and fun things as long as the pleasures of this world are in line with that then it's all part of a so this is not about segregation and aestheticism no it's when I eat and when I drink and when I sleep and when I engage in anything in the world but if it's not in a from a place of distraction it's from a place of connection as Mish says in all yours you should all your ways you should know and says is a form of euphemism for connection for intimacy knew it doesn't mean he knew where he got a resume for y means they connected they became a husband and a wife they had children Das is not knowledge it's Connection in all your ways you should have intimacy with him with Hashem intimacy how it's a fascin they four people went into the orchard the cabalistic orchard Beni died Ben it says n it affected his mind Elish became a heretic R AA went in peace and came out in peace so says what was the difference says when they when they started their Journey upwards it was a very deep spiritual journey raka turned to them and he said these these words when you're going to come up there you're going to see things Al don't say water water that's a what it's very hard to know what he means so the balatan explains there's higher water and there's lower water the greatest mistake we make in life is we say may twice there's that pleasure and there's this pleasure there's religious weird Fanatics okay they they get excited from Heavenly stuff I'm not I like life I enjoy life that separation is what doesn't allow the person any authentic Bliss it's one water the physical and the spiritual are one you want to make sure that every part of your life is aligned it's connected it's a manifestation of divine Oneness it's not an interruption of divine Oneness and that's the question when I'm engaging in this am I interrupt ing Divine Oneness in my own imagination cuz I'm not really but in my own imagination am I interrupting Divine Oneness or am I manifesting it am I embodying it if I'm interrupting it it's always going to use forgery as a substitute because it needs to create a fake source of delight that's not rooted in truth and if it's a manifestation of it it's calm it's really really calm and it's a very very intimate place and it's a place that one feels it and knows it because it's truth you can't substitute anything for that and that's why you know it's interesting we say Friday night in daving you know what that means God gives a day of holiness to a nation that is m means fattened saturated like you know when you saturate the lka in that healthy oil for eight days because the manura burned for eight days that's called Med and you don't want to get close to that lka with all due respect to Kana some of us do it for eight years in honor of the eight days that's called m a fat it's saturated the last if I had to ask you to describe the Jewish people in in in in three words four words I think the last the last statement that any Jew I know would make is this is a people that is fattened by Bliss you could say a lot of things about Jews I don't know but that's the definition a nation that is saturated un Now give me a good G from okay that's okay Hungarian yish that's not G but fine you get the point it's not you have fat it's your fat it's I'm fattened with bliss is that really the definition of the Jewish people which Jews did you grow up with which Jews did you grow up with I know I drew I have a stomach achee I have a heartache I'm getting a stroke I almost had a stroke I almost died yesterday I'm in the middle of dying and this hurts and that hurts and that hurts what about 2,000 years of gullas these PHS were written there say today and then we say everybody's satiated and Bliss who were these people these were written by Jews who knew what suffering was they were not living on Mars what are they talking about they weren't naive they weren't having toxic positivity by overriding their nervous system and smiling say everything is perfect and good and wonderful there's something much deeper going on RAB Akiva himself ultimately his life would be taken by these Romans reaka knew the danger he was in everybody knew the danger they were in the cruelty of the Roman Empire in that generation was beyond belief Beyond Comprehension and the Jews were the primary victims of it the is saying it's it's not something that comes because the Jew doesn't experience pain it's the state of a soul that is free from every blockage and is in touch with the flow of Infinity of Hashem who's the source of all pleasure that the soul is just filled with the great is Delight of experiencing that truth and it's without an agenda The alterb Used To Say by daving me it says into who do I have in heaven and I don't want nothing on Earth so you to say I don't want this world of yours I don't want next world I don't want the lower G I don't want the higher G I want you that's the real ganaden don't get he didn't even get stuck in ganaden I'm going to have a good party I'm that's not the v in that space there's complete Oneness I'm not looking for something I'm not looking for something because I'm looking for something when I'm a little separate when I'm a little separate I'm looking for something and when I'm very separate and I don't know I'm separate I look for things that will validate my separateness and that's why they will disappoint in the real core of the Soul I want you and of course in ganen there's you and inaz there's you when he say I don't want I don't want ganen he's not cursing the world I don't want to get distracted by anything that's not rooted in the Oneness in ganen I want you I don't want to get distracted even by Gaden I'm not Gaden also has potato cougle it looks different it's made with healthy uh it's made Maple whatever I don't know less carbs non-c complex this for sure distractions so who says Al don't separate the water so he he acutely sensed this he acutely he he he truly experienced this now let's understand Whata says when he says what he means when he says and why you crying he says why you crying and they tell him why they're crying and says if they wouldn't be crying he couldn't be laughing it's not I'm laughing because I don't know what you see or I'm thinking about something else no if you wouldn't be crying I wouldn't be able to be laughing that's why he asked him why you're crying wasn't a rhetorical question it wasn't just to prolong the conversation it wasn't just I'm going to answer with a question he was actually beginning his answer tell me why you're crying they told him why you crying and he said that's why I'm laughing and this is very very uh very crucial to understand I once saw a letter that was written in 1965 it's like a seven-page letter was written by the LA to Ellie wiel Ellie wiel was an awit Survivor he used to be a vis he come from a he came from a family of Vis and he remained close to Visions even after the Holocaust but he lost much of his family he didn't want to get married cuz he said why should I bringing children to such a dark evil world theab over the years was trying to convince him to get married so this is like a seven-page letter he's trying to persuade him to get married and elisel got married at the end he has a son he named after his father's name is Alicia [Music] whoops no he was he he was always very close to yish guy but he went through a very difficult Journey you know is a masterpiece his book night night yeah so 50 years after he wrote the book night he wrote an article I remember in the New York Times rash he says Letter to God he says I want to make up with you it's been very hard to fight with you for 50 years very very emotional letter he writes to Hashem 50 years I want to make up with you he says I was so angry at you because I believed in you so much so this letter of writes them it's 65 it's a letter in yish it's an amazing amazing letter very very powerful about the Holocaust and there's a l there's a line there that captures this V OFA the Reb asks he says don't you see in history that the greatest Believers were the one who protested what's happening in the world in the most powerful wayu is called he's the father of faith and he's the one who told is this how you behave you're the Jud of the whole world you're not going to behave justly how does a person speak like this but that's what said sees the Egyptian bondage and what does he say why are you doing this why are you afflicting this people you sent me you haven't saved them you made it worse L why why and the same is true with say how long is this going to happen say after cap because they were sensitive to the pain of their people and the world so theb asked a question to elisel why did none of them lose their amuna why did none of them say you know what I'm done I'm done I don't know if you saw the Jerusalem Post published a poll that the Lazar Institute made 33% of Israel said that their yides and their faith has been strengthened significantly after October 7th 2023 after 33 you're talking about a third of Israeli secular society that said that their has been strengthened after what after what you have seen after what you have suffered after what the Jewish people went through and are still going through who can even conceive of the pain of the families of the hostages and the hostages themselves and the soldiers and their families and the wounded and those are slaying and their families those who are left those who survived what what's the meaning of all of this what's the meaning of all of this SOB says why did none of them lose their amuna and he tells something to Ellie weizel that uh is so so powerful and profound and I'll explain to you they didn't see amuna despite their pain they saw auna in their outcry because they knew themselves they asked themselves a question why are we so outr out raged why are we so outraged why are we so bothered why are we so hurt and they realized that would bother them about the evil in the world was not just that it didn't make sense to them in their brains my brain doesn't want to see such a world or even in their hearts it didn't feel good nobody likes to read about an earthquake wherever it is that killed 10,000 50,000 people it's horrible thing so maybe that was their outcry it doesn't feel good it doesn't sound good it doesn't make sense it hurts me it hurts my family they knew that their outcry was deeper than that they knew that their pain was coming from a place that was deeper than their own intellect that was deeper than their own emotion that was deeper than their own experience they knew that this outcry is coming from the fact that in the deepest part of their soul they know that the truth is goodness the truth truth is love and that's why they were so hurt that the world is so filled with darkness and that's why they knew that their pain is not just pain of somebody feeling you know my finger hurts my heart hurts it doesn't make sense to me but it's coming from a place of infinity in other words they knew from their pain that it's touching the fact that what does it mean it means if goodness is infinite so darkness dark Ness is eclipsing infinity so there's Infinity in the pain it's not just it's painful to me because I don't like it that's a limited form of pain I don't it's painful because I don't understand it okay so it doesn't work in my understanding so my brain is upset by it they knew that their outcry is coming from a place that Justice and goodness is so real it's so authentic it's so true how can it be so concealed how can it be be so manipulated how can it be so exploited and therefore the question doesn't only affect my heart or my mind it affects the core the core of my soul in other words their pain was much deeper and then they asked themselves where is this pain coming from and they realized because goodness is rooted in the core of reality that's beyond my understanding and if that's the truth so then the answer to such a question could never come with logic if the source of goodness and love comes from a place that it's beyond logic it comes from a place of Infinity on one level the pain is so deep because the goodness is rooted in everything everything is really supposed to be everything is rooted in goodness and love and if it's so so so deep so it affects me also in the core of my soul so that's why they're the ones who screamed they were so sensitive to how much corruption is painful and in that very moment they knew but if that's the case how can I even thing that my brain is the one that's going to make sense out of this if the source of love and goodness is not in the intellect it's in something that's pure infinite and that's why I'm so in pain so in that very experience they knew that the whole approach of trying to analyze this and figure it out intellectually is completely completely inappropriate because you're dealing with a place of Infinity of a and for me to say it has to it's going to make in my system in my brain it means I'm completely not connected to the truth of it so you understand that theun and the pain are working Mish side by side if the whole pain was just based because it doesn't make sense to me in other words it's all about my logic so yeah if it doesn't make sense to me I just abandon it but because they understood that they're so in pain because truth and goodness is beyond comprehension it's Ain sa and when you see darkness eclipsing that ain't sa it hurts at the core so they also KN there's no way that a person in their system and their physical brain and human intelligence as brilliant and as great as it is can can can contain Infinity there's no way that that goodness and love is something that I can Define so they had to surrender that there's a truth of love and there's a truth of goodness that is beyond what a person can comprehend and that's why they could say and even stronger cuz it just brought out how much they were rooted in that love and how that love is is so so powerful and and so profound and that's what you'll see in life it's a very sensitive things and some of you will know this some of you may not which is fine there are people who went on very very deep Journeys to the point that they were opened up to their pain in very very profound ways and it almost F felt like they're going to die and suddenly they start laughing in that core pain that they touch there's also a sense of love and Bliss and it's it's almost crazy it's like insanity people who went on certain Journeys healing Journeys other Journeys and in that moment where there's like such pain and it's unfathomable and suddenly they start laughing why am I laughing and suddenly like a sense of delight and Bliss and it's not rational what just happened you're muga you're not crazy what happened is something very very deep till that moment they weren't actually allowing themselves to feel their pain because it was too painful they were running from it they were distracting themselves with different things and that's what we do there's moments when we surrender we surrender everything and then we feel the pain and the Real Pain we're feeling is real pain that you're feeling is the pain of an it's the pain of your soul is infinite and when Infinity when Infinity is in a dark world when it seems that Infinity is abused it's infinitely painful and at that very moment there's a bliss cu the moment you touched your Infinity you're indestructible as well as long as I'm running away from my pain I'm not ready to really face it I will never feel my Bliss ever there are people you know if I have a leak in the house I'm going to shut the water in the boiler system right no water is going to come out not even clean water there's people that because of pain they shut down the water system they don't want to feel they don't feel pain they also can't feel Joy I can't one is depending on dependent on the other pain means that I'm open to the truth and if my soul went into Gus Hashem went into gas truth went into gas I misunderstood never mind somebody who went through painful and difficult situations and life abuse and so forth emotional neglect my infinite soul went through so much that's painful as long as I was distracting myself from the pain I couldn't feel my Bliss I was looking for distraction when I stop distracting myself and I'm ready to face adversity in the eyes and feel everything I will feel how painful it is because you're infinite and when Infinity is blocked or at least we think it's blocked it's really painful it's more painful than anything else because it's real it's real it's not just we like to have a good life and in our imagination everything should be Blissful and it's not feeling that way that's a very limited experience that's not an experience of they felt the pain on an [Music] level that means it's real if God God is crying it means truth is crying do you know how painful that is that's not just it's not comfortable with my lifestyle and the moment when you feel that it's a different level of pain it's also the death of ego and I feel like I'm going to die CU my ego is going to die at that moment that's I don't want to let it happen when I do let it happen you know what else happens suddenly you feel your bliss you feel that your soul was not destroyed God is Not destroyed the soul went into exile but it's not destroyed nobody can destroy it and therefore in that Insanity of pain there's also the insanity of bliss it's a completely different different level of experience and that's why you'll always know when you're feeling pain if it's real pain remember behind that pain there's love and you have to choose what to focus on of course there's pain but why is there pain there's pain because there's love what happened in is Israel so much pain but the Jewish people felt something in that pain they felt the goodness of CLA Isel they felt the Holiness of K is they felt what evil is and they felt the pain of evil destroying trying to destroy kadus they came close to that part of themselves and when you come close to that part of yourself amuna is your organic State amuna means that you're obsessed with goodness it means that you know that goodness is so real that even if I don't understand anything that's going on I'm not going to ignore the B Mikes to be able to party with Rome I'm not you know when the CL beb once there was a Nazi who kicked him and said are you the chosen people he said yeah he gave him a kick he was bleeding he said you still believe that you're the chosen people he said yes are you crazy he said as long you're the ones who are beating you're the ones who are gazing you're the ones who are murdering we're not I know know that we're the chosen people I'm going to give away and say I don't care about the bikes I don't care about goodness I don't care about truth I don't care about this I can go to Rome get that little broken fake pleasure I'm not going to give up Theus of TI of of the bikes the grief ofik to be able to have this Fest to be able to have this feast it's not worth it if I have to give up this pain in order to be able to experience this fake Bliss it's all fake so when they told Raba why they're crying said look how you're crying why is it affecting you so much why why is it affecting you so much why you weeping why you sobbing because for you goodness is not a superficial thing it's not just a selfish thing it's not just a comfort thing it's it's an infinite thing you're really really connected to it and that's what's paining you so much Ah that's where all the Ty is that's where all the Bliss is now connect to that place in that very place of the pain there is infinity and if there is infinity there it's the source of all the Bliss of all the pleasure so now the mar says other is alive D alive D other Hashem lives [Music] D the moment a person enters into a Consciousness where Al is D where my Bliss is not based on distractions ever it's based on the fact that I'm a vehicle I'm a door I'm a d a home D is live you live for the ALF that's where s comes from that's why when the gar wants to describe the joy of other it doesn't divorce it from of he says just like sh it's not that our calendar is schizophrenic we sit on the floor and put eggs in our ashes put eggs in ashes and then some we forgot about it and put him we forgot about it no pain and pleasure are connected at all time just because because by that's why it's because you're crying for the Flames that's why I'm laughing say it's not two separate things it's when I could see your tears I could see the infinite goodness in you am means that the Jew believes that goodness and Bliss is not just something we would like to Aspire to because it feels good that's a very limited experience of pain it's big but it's still limited it's because the pain is hashem's pain it's the pain of truth it's the pain of that's a different type of pain much deeper it's much more real but if that's what the truth that means that means that it's not something I need to understand and I could understand and it means that that's coming from a Source that's all all goodness and pleasure and love because when we see truth truth going up in Flames godliness Going Up in Flames kadha Going Up in Flames at least on a physical level it's not really going up in Flames but on a physical level It's Going Up in Flames we feel we grieve it we grieve it therefore if I'm in that space the tears also come with infinite Joy with infinite laughter because it's rooted in the source of everything it's rooted in the source of pleasure it's not a source that I'm going to make sense with my brain nothing I said in this class makes sense if it does you don't understand what do I mean is it's not like this is ma it's not math this not mathematical it's not mathematical it's not it's something that the core of the Soul knows very well it feels the deep deep pain it surrenders completely its brain its ego its need to understand and at that moment there's a bliss that is as potent and much more potent because the source of everything is goodness not Darkness [Music] so now let's go to the last source and finish with this very appropriate ending SOI when he wants to describe the says they're going to come with tears why are they going to come with tears why will everybody be crying so some of say no because they were crying before and their daving and their TR therefore they're going to come to the Gul but the balat says no with tears they're going to go to the Gul because in the true sense of reality the tears of the Jewish people and the joy of the Jewish people are not two separate realities you know sometimes a person overcomes a tremendous crisis and you just look at it and you're crying and then you're laughing and you're crying and you're dancing and the crying is also joyful it's almost like wow how did this all happen the crying here is not a contradiction to the Joy they're both touching a chord in the person where the ego has died where there has been complete surrender and ble and with the person now is a channel for truth and of there there's a lot of pain there's a lot of pain because it's not just my own pain it's not my ego's pain it's it's the pain of truth it's the pain of there's a lot of pain a lot of tears and over there there's infinite Joy also there's infinite Bliss it's the Bliss because Hashem is the source of all Bliss and over there it's infinite Bliss it's not Bliss that's going to be described it's Bliss of complete vacus with that source that is beyond comprehension and therefore transcends any calculation and any comprehens so when the has to describe the life of the Jew it sandwiches all the laws of in between two TS two constants and these are constants they have to be constants because this is the oxygen of Life the first is NE sum means that Hashem is before me constantly more than a rule it's an awareness it's an awareness it's almost like it's it's the best news in the world you never have to go into isolation you never have to make believe you're alone you never have to believe you're alone you never have to survive in loneliness sum it means I'm always in a relationship I'm always linked to Infinity I'm always in a expression of I don't have to distract myself it's always available for me the source of all truth and Bliss and pleasure is available it's comit it's here I may have to work through things I may have temptations I may have distractions my brain may be slepping me here my heart may be slepping me here something may be overwhelming okay I have to work it through but it's always available my soul is always available to have a relationship with that's that's the first because of that you have the second what's the second a good heart an open heart a heart that's open to truth rash says an expansive Das again using the word Das expansive conscious M I'm always in a state of feasting always in a state of feasting doesn't mean I'm drinking 247 I don't think that is what was trying to finish with it's like a funny funny ending for like we went through this whole with like a billion obligations and by the way you should always be parting it's a little it seems strange right the whole is you have to do this you have to do this you have to do this how does it end just go just go party but the truth is that is the ending of because the party it doesn't mean I'm G to eat cake and drink schnaps means when you're in touch with my heart is open m I'm always in a state of of mish I'm always in a state of of why it doesn't mean I have no distractions and it doesn't mean I'm never overwhelmed doesn't mean I don't have stress but it means that there's a core in me that I know is always always Serene it's always available it's that part that will not allow distractions my soul will not allow me to run away my soul will always remain anchored in that space and because of that M the person always has a reference point and a parad to be anchored in a place where I can choose I can choose the positivity I can choose the connectivity I can choose the truth and even if it's painful I will not run away from it because it's that pain that allows allows the reala for one moment AA for one moment will not say I wish we were like the Romans get rid of the B Mikes there's nothing Up in Flames I have noas to this now let's go party says if I need to give up this for that it's worthless it's a mockery it's a joke because the pain of the Jew is rooted in truth it's rooted in authenticity it's rooted in infinite goodness and if I have to give up infinite goodness to be able to celebrate life woe to that celebration woe to that mockery of goodness woe to that fakeness of joy of festivity if I want real Joy I want real Bliss real Divine I can't let go of the experience of all the pain of AOS the pain when a b is Up in Flames but I also know that in that very process goodness has not been destroyed it's been eclipsed it's been covered over we're going through a lot a lot of stuff but at the core of all of life is the consciousness of redemption and Oneness and Bliss have a wonderful week may we see the just a a fast announcement next week we're on Tuesday Morning 9:30 a.m. and as I announced in the beginning my dear wife my better half is starting a class that's the person from whom I uh have learned everything I know she's starting a class next week here on linkr the Flyers are on the beam everybody is invited have a beautiful week and a lot of may we see a now