Actions & Echos: Sefira, A Time to Think of Others - Rabbi Yaakov Asher Sinclair

the torah teaches us about the disease called saras tsarat the principal cause of surat was slander but the affliction was also a punishment for other forms of antisocial behavior notably notably bloodshed false oaths immorality pride robbery and selfishness the punishment for the matsura someone with saras was that he had to be separated from the rest of society in the situation the world finds itself in we're all living separated from the rest of society and i think this would be a very good time to take stock of the relationships in our lives the time of sphere between pesach and shivat is a time when we try and improve those relationships the relationship of adam lachavero man and his fellow our fellow children our fellow means our parents our spouses during the time of the sephirah all 24 000 talmidim of rebia kiva passed away each because they didn't respect each other they didn't give kavod one to the other and from this terrible punishment we can see how essential how vital it is that the way we treat other people i'd like to share with you a story about how careful we have to be with the feelings of others and how much damage we can do khalilah if we're not there's a story about a young man shortly before his marriage he went to see a great talmud and he said that he's something to tell him that weighed heavily on his mind something that even the day of his marriage would not atone for he said i grew up in yerushalayim when food was a luxury nobody even knew what a banana looked like one day the rebbe went out of the classroom for a few moments and he left a few coins on the stender a few pennies i was so hungry and i took the money and i put it in my pocket the rebbe came back and immediately saw the money was gone he made the whole class stand in the line facing the wall and one by one he checked our pockets so quickly i dropped the money into the pocket of the boy he was standing next to me when it came his turn he couldn't believe that the money wasn't was there and he started to cry he pleaded with the rebbe and told him he hadn't stolen the money of course no one believed him after that he got a name of being a thief and not longer or much longer after that he dropped out of the cada and bit by bit he went down and down until he dropped his yiddish kite his jewishness his religion completely and became totally secular even though the day a person gets married is a day of atonement a yom kippur for him how can i ever atone for what i did to that poor boy the torah sage said this reminds me of something that happened to me when i was also in haida the rebbe also made a stand in the line facing the wall and when he found the culprit he didn't let on who it was but he simply put the money back in his own pocket and when he got to the line he said 12 everybody turn around and let's all say together bring us back to hashem and we'll return we'll do tuba as it happens that little boy who took the money went on to be one of the great terrorist soldiers taurus scholars of the age he said to him look you're not to blame for that other boy dropping out you were young you were hungry and that fellow himself hashem will understand what he went through and judge him accordingly the person i'm really concerned about is the rebbe through a moment's lack of judgment and sensitivity he ruined someone's entire life our actions have echoes once said grandchildren and the prize you get for not killing your own children sometimes even your own children can give you a narciss a friend of mine told me a story about one of my sons and that gave me a lot of narciss he told me that on the first day that his little boy was going to haida so this little boy got onto the tender the bus and he sat down and after a few moments he started to cry so this friend told me that my son who was a few years older than this little boy came over to him and he gave him a sweetie a candy and asked him what his name was the little boy calmed down and my son gave him a smile so this friend told me now that they have a family tradition that on the first day of haitha all his boys get onto the tender with sweets and candies for the little ones whose day because that's their first day our actions have echoes there was a young fellow from a religious family in brenebrach who decided one day that he'd turn his back on god on religion he moved out of home and into his uncle who was hilony who was secular he moved into his uncle's apartment in tel aviv a stone's throw from bernay brac current geographically but as far as mars religiously time went on and this little this young fellow this young fellow met and fell in love with the non-jewish girl he got engaged to her now this was too much even for his secular uncle and he became very angry with them however in spite of all the uncle's efforts to get the f the the nephew to cancel the wedding the nephew was determined to marry this fiance this non-jewish girl the uncle at least was able to convince his nephew at least he should go home and tell his parents face to face what he planned to do the young fellow agreed and he agreed to go back for shabbas for shabbat provided that his parents agreed to his conditions his conditions meant that he spent most of shabbat night friday night chilling on his parents porch with a cigarette in his mouth and shabbat morning he was out there again using his iphone in the afternoon his father came over and asked him if he wanted to go with him to ashior and shala should was given by rav iron labe stainman surprisingly this this fellow went now after this year his father brought him over to wish the rav a good shabbos yeah his father told raph stayman that his son was no longer shabbos and looked at the fellow and asked him how long is it since you kept childless two years the other the young fellow said during that time did you ever have any thoughts of chuva yes he said about four times and how long did each of those episodes last for about ten minutes said rashdaman ah so it comes out that in the last two years you had forty minutes of bamakum bali chuva ain sadikim gumurum om dimsham for 40 minutes you were on a level higher than the tadican for that sir stayman i envy you good shabbos the young fellow returned to his uncle's apartment in tel aviv but rashdaman's words wouldn't let him rest he canceled the wedding one thing led to another until today hashem he returned to avodah sashem people asked him what made him want to go to stamenshier in the first place there he was sitting on the porch playing with his iphone puffing cigarettes opposite the windows of the neighbors he answered when i was in kita dalet in haider my class went in to be taste to be tested by aaron lay the rebbe asked that we should be given simple questions easy questions and so rebound labe asked us questions that everyone could answer when each boy answered this question robert lave gave him a candy and when it was my turn to go in he asked me an easy question but i i didn't know the answer so he asked me an easier question i still didn't know the answer so he asked me an even easier question i still didn't know the answer well everyone was leaving with their candy in their hand rabara and labe just gestured to me to come over to him he said to me in torah in yiddish kite you get reward for effort not for results all the other children they tried to answer one question and they received one candy you tried to answer three questions so you get three candies and when the smile with a smile he dropped three candies into my hand our actions have echoes as parents and teachers we have to be so careful to use only the voice of yaakov the kolyakov to encourage and inspire and give love through our words and not to turn them into the sword of criticism you day asaf and parshas the varmint says israel says that the word ava has the same letters as aurev meaning sweet as teachers as parents we must make those eluding those words of torah sweet for our children i was also thinking that our relationship with our fellow man beat our our children our spouse also impacts on our relationship with the other two relationships we have in our life with hashem with our relationship between adam lamocca as it's called god and man and our relationships with ourselves which is called adam atma man to himself a friend sent me an email and uh it made me laugh it went something like this um for those of my generation who do not and cannot comprehend why facebook exists i'm trying to make friends outside of facebook while applying the same principles and therefore every day i walk down the street and i tell pastors by what i've eaten how i feel at that particular moment what i did the day before what i will do later and with whom and i give them pictures of my family my dog and of me gardening of taking things apart in the garage watering the lawn standing in front of landmarks driving around town having lunch and doing what everybody else does every day i also listen to their conversations and i give them thumbs up and tell them that i like them and it works just like facebook i already have four people following me two police officers a private investigator and a psychiatrist well i loled as they say nowadays when i read the that uh email but after a reflection i thought to myself how sad how very sad are the super superficial relationships the past for friendship on the brave new web as we said a person has three relationships in this world with others with a shame and with himself when a person doesn't have a real relationship with other people he just friends them in a superficial way then his other relationships will also become impacted by that superficiality he'll friend hashem there's no real relationship there's no sense of commitment or or consequence he just dials it in he phones it in he phones into governing he phones in his avodah's hashem and he just friends himself he's not really in contact with who he really is he loses his self-respect his tsurus are adam his divine image which makes him a man and he becomes debased and closer to the animals the first base amigdas the first temple was destroyed because of three cardinal availas three cardinal sins they are shvika's domin murder avodah zara idolatry and guillerias sexual immorality these three cardinal sins represent a breakdown in man's relationship with his fellow with god and himself murder is the breakdown of man's relationship with others quite obviously the ultimate breakdown about azura idol worship is the breakdown of the relationship with god he puts other gods elohim in god's place attributes powers to things where there is no other power except hashem and guillerias immorality is the breakdown of the relationship between man and himself he becomes more animal more bestial and less of a human being less of the duke no shall adam i was thinking that the three patriarchs the three avot avraham yitzhak nyakov stand in polar opposition to these three cardinal sins avraham aveeno is the pillar of khesid of man's relationship to his fellow man of adam because it was tent was always open to the four corners of the world to bring in guests presid is the polar opposite of murder kindness is the opposite of murder yitzhak it's isaac is the opposite of idolatry for yitzhak is the older tamima as hazal called him itzhak was prepared to become a koraban an offering to hashem as it says that the affaro shall yitzhak munnach hashem the ashes of yitzhakovino are constantly lying in front of hashem in front of god he is the ultimate example of the avodah tamima the ole tamima the ultimate relationship of man and god the polar opposite of a vodazora of idol worship and yaakov avinu jacob is the ultimate surah sa'adam the ultimate picture of the way a man should be because it is his likeness that is engraved on the kisekovo the throne of glory that mystical concept which we understand or we don't understand is the throne of glory on which caviar so to speak as hashem sits it's yaakov that the malachim saw engraved on the kisehav covered its yakuba venus presents the correct picture of man and his elevation above the beasts and interestingly enough it was the diukno the face the face of yak of yosef fatsadik of joseph who saved yaakov avinu from stumbling with the wife of potiphar in the aveira the potential of era of immorality davka specifically it was his face rumor shapiro we just celebrated founded the da fayomi got together all the godolam of europe for a photograph at the end of the the seem of the first shas the first cycle of the shas and as he did this half of them put up their hands in front of their faces and he turned and he said rabosa my masters a day is coming when it will only be your heiliger punim your holy faces which will save a generation the face the face is the nim a few years ago my daughter came home from school and told us that a teacher taught us a madrish that in the days just before mashiach hashem will stretch a rope from one end of the world to the other and everyone will have to grab onto it and he will shake it very hard and only those with very strong imuno will be able to hang on she said daddy we have to find that rope where's the rope is it going to go through ramata skull will we be able to hang on right now hashem is shaking that rope he's shaking our complacency and he's going to shake it harder and harder and yes it goes right the way through ramat skull it goes through tel aviv it goes through banay bracket goes through your town wherever you are in the world the shabbos table last week the conversation got around to if you knew that you only had five minutes to live what would you tell your children what would be what would you pass on to them that same daughter said i would tell them children fight for your immune i'd like to finish with this story there's a poetry there was a poetry competition in london and the competition was to resolve to excuse me was to recite mismo ladavid hashem the lord is my shepherd what they call the lord's prayer in the non-jewish world it was open to everybody and there was a a young fellow who got up and he started to say in english the lord is my shepherd i shall not want and he recited it so beautifully but at the end there was a pause and everybody just the whole the whole hall erupted in applause and um when it came to the end the judge stood up the judges stood up and the main judge awarded him the prize and he came up to the stage and he took in his hands the prize in his hands and he was just about to leave everything was about to finish when there was a little jewish fellow who walked up and he said in front of the stage said judges excuse me would you mind please if i could just say my version of the lord's prayer he got up and everybody looked around a bit embarrassed what are you going to say to this guy so he said he got up on the stage and he started to speak and after about a line and a half the whole hall the whole auditorium went silent and everybody started to cry cried and cried he got to the end he took a little bow and he said thank you everybody got off the stage [Music] so this fellow who who won the prize rushed over to him and he rushed out into the street with him and he said you take the present you take the prize it's your prize there's no doubt about it you you take the prize it's your price so this little jewish fellow said beshuma finished you won the prize you won it fair and square i'm not going to take your prize so this young fellow said to him okay but one thing i want to know why why was it that when i said the lord is my shepherd that everybody cheered and clapped and when you said the lord is my shepherd everybody cried and he said to him i know the shepherd we live in a world of tremendous superficiality our job is to know that there's a shepherd and that everything he does is to shepherd his people israel may we see yeshua's behaving thank you very much