Acharei Mot-Kedoshim - Ve’ahavta le’Reyacha Kamocha | Rabbi Baruch Taub | April 23 2026

Good morning everybody. Uh our collective shalom. Um we were away by design not by choice for two months. So I am really the official draft dodger of Ala and I. So we're here. We're back. Borashem. And everybody should be back where they're supposed to be here in Artosha. Um okay kadoshim the we're going to talk about the m ofat is from a number of different sources a number of different ideas and the first piece I have here is interestingly enough from ravy kamki so I have to I can't resist this is all nothing is by accident you can't make these things up but in the middle of the night last night in New York my daughter my granddaughter hoodie hoodie tower got engaged age to a great grandson of Ryakov Kamineski. So there you go. There you go. So here we are. And I still haven't spoken to her or my children. It was in the middle of the night. Okay. Theim uh Lot is not to hate a Jew, not to hate any Jew, even if he's to the farthest left of the political spectrum. Right. We can rebuke. There's a mitzvah to rebuke a person who's doing the wrong thing. We're not going to do all these mitzvah, but I'm just showing you. And it's interesting. Don't take revenge. And um is like somebody asks you, Mor says, could you uh lend me your a your axe? And you said, "Uh, no, you didn't lend me yours yesterday. I'm not lending it." And Lotor is even worse because he says, "Can I borrow your axe?" So he says, "I'm even though you didn't lend it to me last time, I'm going to lend you mine." That's these are okay, right? You should love every Jew as yourself. Ani hashem. Okay. Now, I should point out this is not on the sheet. Somebody's calling me. Let me turn my phone off. Apologize. >> There's your granddaughter. >> Laura, I'll call you back with the title after my sharing. I'll call you in 45 minutes. >> Okay. You want the title? Okay. Gabro. Gibbro. G E B R O C H >> K S K Z >> Gro. R C T T T T T T T T T T T T T T T T T T T T T T T T T T T T T T T T T T T T T T T T Z. >> Tell us that English word. >> CT Z KZ. >> No, not not uh not R O C. R O Yeah. R O C T Zed Ro. Yes or no? Question mark. >> Thank you, Laura. I appreciate it. >> Not how. >> It's my halakash here for next Wednesday night if anyone's interested. Okay. >> What's that? >> Better late than never. >> No, I don't I don't want to get people excited about it, right? But I'm I I eat I eat gross. I proudly eat gabros. Although I was a rabbi in a hotel in South Africa which was completely non gabros. But anyway I have a problem because I only eat matzah during the week a whole week. So it's it's six of one half a dozen of another. But I can have canal right with anyway. So you can come to the shir. All right let's u not on the sheet. I have to say the ramban says about kamoka. Love your neighbor as you love every Jew like you love yourself. So the Ramban says this is uh um a guzma uses a different word but it's it's um it's impossible and he say it's impossible for two reasons. Number one it's against the law because um you your life comes first. For example, the famous sto example that Gomorrah gives, two people are in a desert and there's a canteen with enough water for one person. You don't divide it am you don't give it to him. You don't divide it in two. Only one person can survive. You have to keep it for yourself. So number one, it's against the law to love someone as much as you love yourself. And number two, it's psychologically impossible because uh Adam Karov and you know paraphrase that man's best friend is himself. Right? However, what the Ramban is telling us, he's not being dismissive of this. He's really defining it for us. As hard as it is and as much as it doesn't make sense, ultimately this is the the mitzvah to love a person beyond the letter of the law. beyond the letter of the law. Right? Uh the example, one of the examples the Gmorrah gives in Bitsia, let's say this reb rabbi came to his rebi and he said um I found I found this ox in the street in the public domain rashim. Can I keep it? He said yes. Right? Then after within 30 days the guy came and he sold him gave him a sim a sign on the ox. You know the ox is wearing glasses, right? So do I have to give it back? He said yes. He says it doesn't make sense. You you know on one hand you told me the halak is I can keep it. It was in the public domain. But then you tell me if he said it has a sign. It shows me a sign. I have to give it back. He said the keeping it that's the that's the but beyond the letter of the law is you have to give it back to him. And that is the goal of every Jew in terms of relating to every other Jew. Okay. So but now let's go into some of the things that these uh these rabbis are saying. So first Ryaku Kamki Z. If you look in the mitzvot of the Rambam, the Rambam for the uninitiated, the Rambam has a safer mitzvot which is a short form of the mitzvah not like his Mishna Torah which is discusses everything at length. U mitzvah Zion 207 and quote this mitzvah to love the convert and God says you shall love the G. It's a mitzvah in the Torah even though he becomes part of Israel. And you have the mitzvah, love every Jew like you love yourself. So why is there a separate mitzvah? God when he when he becomes a Jew, God added on an additional obligation, additional love, a separate mitzvah. There there's a mitzvah not to oppress, right? So we also have not to oppress a Jew, not to oppress a really explain. So just like by oppression, the mitzvah of oppressing somebody um is is two mitzvah for the gum. We here to with love also. Why is that? What do what do I have to do that for? Right. How do you explain this? He goes into great length. But the low you shouldn't say that the Torah gives us a separate mitzvah to love the Geno. He's not really a Jew. You know, he's not really Jewish. You know, he's not, you know, he doesn't have the pedigree, Jewish pedigree. And in terms of by the way, G cannot be on the bait. He can't be on the on the right. So he's not really part of so no is here. Therefore the Torah has to go out of its way also for two mitzvah for the g right. Don't make that mistake. Number one is you love him because he's a Jew. He is a Jew. And secondly, him to love the convert. So anyway, that's that's how the Rambam explains it. Okay, let's go again. Okay, we something that he says. It's normal to think that's the mitzvah of giving rebuke, right? There's a mitzvah in the Torah that if someone is doing something wrong that you have to correct them, right? It has to be done with love, right? But you're correcting him, right? So we generally people make the mistake, you know, I'm God's policeman, right? I see somebody doing something wrong, you know, in sh whatever he did wrong this, I'm going to tell him because I know this and he doesn't and I'm going to tell we're God's policemen, right? That's what we normally think. We have an obligation. We're we're working we're working on behalf of the right since God wants the Jewish people to keep his mitzvah. So therefore, we're supposed to be the mashk. We're supposed to be, you know, the the principal, the vice principal. So they too should do the mitzvah according to this. So it comes out that the mitzvah of rebuke is a mitzvah between man and God right I'm God's right enforcer right the truth be told if this was really the purpose of the Torah it's very hard if you get to the point that you're going to be embarrassing him in public, you're not allowed to do it. Right? So that means that there's a concern here. This is a mitzvah between man and man. Right? Right? In other words, if if you have to get to that point, you can do it even though it is an isidorita because we have the obligation to do it. But why are we concerned whether you are allowed you're not allowed to embarrass him, right? Gamu also which is strange the Goran talks about that gamor is the whole of giving rebuke until you get to the point where you you have to hit him you don't hit him or you have to curse him you don't go that far why you don't see that by any other mitzvah in the Torah And a person has to put on fill in right in public even a guy starts pushing him you know he hits him the guy hits him what are you doing you still have to put on fillin right you're not you're not exempt from filling unless it's guy's going to kill you right but if somebody just push you still have to put on fillin so how come by you you have to stop if the guy's going to curse you if he's going to hit you right you have to guy's cursing him to put on. You have to put on your and put on your different. So obviously the answer is we're not God's policeman. It's a it's a mitzvah between me and him because I care about him. is telling us what the mitzvah is which I showed you an example that the mitzvah is listed in our para together with all other mitzvah between man and man right it's not by accident see not hating a Jew loving a Jew revenge The Torah sets parameters here. the mitzvah that the person who you're giving mus to has to feel that you care about me. You know, I want to tell you something. May I tell you a right? First of all, I want to tell you I love you. You're my friend and nothing's going to change about my opinion to you. Even though, you know, I see you're watering your grass on my on next door to my house and it's driving me crazy, but I have to tell you that really, let's talk about it. Right? So, he has to feel that you love him, right? when he tells him you can't do it right the sinner has to feel if he returns something a lost article all right he gives an example I'm not going to go into the example but you hear what's going on here and he finishes off by saying it's you're elevating the person right that's what you have to do okay that's the now another piece to this mitz of is very important. So it's it's I guess you could say it's a kind of a a submit mitzvah of loving another Jew. It has to be done with loving another Jew, right? With a Israel. Now let's look at number four. This is Salvik. This is the Neph. It's Rahers writing the Torah of Salvik. And he has he has a on this mitzvah also. Okay? Because there's an exception to the rule which we're going to see where you don't have to give to right. Let's see. Very important. Good morning. Listen to this. Just like there's a mitzvah to tell somebody that he's going to understand. To give a m something he's going to understand. There's a same mitzvah. There's a the same way there is a mitzvah not to tell him that you to do something or you can't do something. If he's not going to understand right very important right now he has a question here he's going to say a bigish but he's going to ask a question what's this kashim just like there's a mitzvah to tell somebody something he's going to listen to kain similarly there's a mitzvah not to tell him not to tell him something he's not going to understand what it's just two separate things. What do you mean kashame? There's not there seem to be an uncommon denominator here. One is you tell a person something that he's going to hear and if he then you don't tell him something he's not going to hear. What's the kashame? What's the why is this linked together? Why are these two things linked together? That you should tell him and that you shouldn't tell him. Why are they linked together? It seems like it's one thing. Ara the purpose of of of is to take this person who's a Russia but he's doing a vishno and to turn him into a sadik that's that's the goal right explained that to us right not doing go we care about him he quotes another better that a person should do something wrong unknowingly, then you go and explain it to him that it's not allowed to do and now he's not going to listen. What's worse, right? Now that you've told him this is the this is what a Jew supposed to do and before that he didn't know that. So maybe just leave it alone if you know he's not going to listen. Right? When a person transgresses not on purpose, he's still at Sadi, right? He doesn't know any better. So, he's still officially at right, right? They're not purposefully going against the Torah, right? But if you give him, you tell him, explain it to him, and you know very well he's going to continue doing the iser, right? I I feel amazed that he's going to do it now purposely. You have now made him into a Russian. So what did you accomplish? Right? So it's going to show that it's all part of one thing. They're not two separate issues. Tell somebody something who's going to understand it. And don't tell somebody something's not. They're not separate things. It all stems from the same source. This is the mitzvah of the real according to the simple understanding of the verse. And that's why it's similarly just like similarly. They're not two separate things. They're one thing. The mitzvah of not telling him something he doesn't understand. That is part of the mitzvah of giving rebuke. The mitzvah of not giving rebuke under certain circumstances if you're not going to listen is part of the mitzvah of rebuke right it's part of the mitzvah even though is to remove from the person by giving him even though you're 100% sure you're not going to accomplish anything. There are certain circumstances like there are certain aas you know whatever they are very serious significant aas that you have to tell no matter what I know he's not going to listen to me. So there are circumstances right by how come in general the general principle is no he's going to continue doing the a but he's going to do it you have to say under these circumstances there's a contradiction simple understanding of rebuke not to turn him in to a evil person and also the it's like a general that's a demoral language just aic terminology we can we can skip that go down to the second last lineo So the rabbis in the Gmorra and the Mishna explained to him you can't do both. You can't, right? So you don't It's all part of the It's all part of the mitzvah of giving rebuke. Part of the mitzvah of yes, I have to give rebuke is not to give rebuke. If he's not going to listen, you're making matters worse because your whole purpose is to make him into it. Okay. How are we doing timewise? Because we started so late. What time is it? >> It's 5:30 after 11. >> We're going to do it. Okay. This is the last piece. This is from Rav Hutner and it's a classic uh idea for us to to to have. Okay. Forget about the the first uh two lines. It's a because it's picking up from you see it's chapter eight in the whole discussion. and he has um there's a mitzvah inv forgiveness right if you do something wrong to somebody you have to say I'm sorry right that's called you have to go and ask we say we normally say right second I'm All right. Still had my ways on the whole time. Okay. So, uh but I was with you. Okay. Here. Listen what he says. Um the idea of asking for forgiveness the time of chuva, right? Asking God for forgiveness, right? Um totally different mindset. We talk about chuva, right? Person doing chuva. He's repenting between man and God. Man and man the idea is to you have to correct the there's a there's a breach here. You have to correct the breach. Right. You have to explain it to the guy, right? You have to say pause. This is what I did. Guy lost money for another person, right? He sends him money to take to do something and he loses the money. If you repay him, you if it's something you did, right? You were a messenger, you were shal, you went on a mission for him, and you lost the money, right? Whatever it whatever it is, without going into differences, you owe him money, you have to pay him back the money, right? Once you pay him back, there's nothing lost. Nothing lost, nothing gained, right? Nothing lost, nothing gained. That's that's between man and man. Okay. But if you hurt a person's feelings, you do something wrong to him, you you know, you you insult him, you abuse him, right? Oh, you embarrass him. After the tsar is removed, right? moment after after you you say I'm sorry but the the pain is still there. He's still embarrassed, right? He's still embarrassed. I didn't mean it. Right. But since if you ask forgiveness sincerely, you're also removing the pain. You're removing the pain, right? So, it'll become clear in a second. Let me explain how this works, right? We're back to our original mitzvah. The mitzvah to love every Jew, right? In other words, it's not enough that you say you're sorry and he's still hurt. That's what he's saying. If he's still hurt, it's not good enough. It has to be such an I'm sorry, such a a an appeasement to the person that he's not going to be heard anymore. Right? Why is that? So listen to what he says very beautifully. The mitzvah of loving every Jew. It's not a mitzvah just that I have to be a lover that I have to be beloved. That he's got to love me again, right? You hear means it's not good enough that I love you. I'm sorry what I did. He has to love you again. He has to feel that you he loves you. That's a that's a tough nut to crack. But that's what we have to do in the mitzvah of appeasement to a person if you wronged him, right? The nature of love. Every lover wants to be loved, right? Every person wants to be loved, right? You want to like somebody, you want to be liked back, right? It's human nature, right? Human psychology. 101. This idea of wanting to become beloved. This is part of the mitzvah to love. Part of the mitzvah to love is to love him to such an extent that I will be loved by him. Okay. Very very beautiful idea. any between a man and his friend. So you do something wrong against another Jew. So there's two dimensions to what you did wrong. He harmed his fellow. He hurt him. I'm a lover, but I didn't act you like I love you. and bait. Number two, he's given the friend or former friend a license to have tinus on him to hate him. Right? Because part of the process the mitzvah is not only to be a lover but to be beloved. Right? Therefore, after he asks forgiveness for appeasement from his friend and the guy, let's say, doesn't want to he doesn't want to forgive you. But if you tell me you've you've taken away the license to hate you. I sincerely ask you to forgive me. I've taken away his license to hate me. He can no longer hate me. Right? He has to love me. Right? But he's he's angry. Right? You've done your job. You go as far as you can go. You go as far as you can go. Right? I suggest you wait at least 24 hours. Right? As we all know, maybe not in your experience, in my experience, you have to wait a little bit, right? You have to think things calm down, right? But if not that you've done your job, I show you I not only I love you, but I really want you to love me. I really this the wrong thing I did. You give a present. Whatever you do, nothing nothing happens, right? Sal, the head of the the founder of the Muser movement, right? If someone speaks about somebody and this is part of this mitzvah and the guy doesn't know about it, you spoke about him and the guy doesn't know about it. is but if you go to him and say listen I want to ask you right you know yeshiva the boy the minigan yeshiva is if those who went to yeshiva you know that kipper everybody goes they line up everybody goes I want to ask you I want to ask you so one time a guy said to me I want to ask you I asked on you I said to you know because I'm I'm sad I said did you enjoy it he said he said yeah I said okay then I forgive you okay but listen to this But the re the truth is the do if you tell the guy if you're going to tell somebody I spoke lot on you is the guy's going to be very pain you spoke lot on me you know you know the mshel about lash horror it's like a guy goes in the street on a windy day and cuts open a feather pillow and the feathers go all over the world it's finished you said something about this guy it's all over right and I'm in pain that you did this kaza You cannot ask. You don't ask. How do you like that? Because by asking even though you love him, right, you're not making yourself beloved to him and you're going to tell him this. You're going to pain him. You're putting him in a terrible situation, right? the the obligation to ask does not come with a license to pain your friend. So you have to step back and I would say I would add to this I'm not gonna that's too much but you hear the point. We'll finish off with this time. Is it quarter after? >> Yeah. >> Okay. Perfect timing.