A Tale of a Brother and a Sister by Rabbi Shai Finkelstein

hello everyone so uh first I would just like to say that the sh is uh being uh sponsored and dedicated in memory of Mel Davids by his daughters and son-in-law and for their in their entire family obviously in Mel's memory should be okay so we are starting a new uh a new MID that talks about uh obviously about tshav so it will be in preparation for tshav anyone who would like to practice his Hebrew his or her Hebrew he's more and then welcome to come tonight at 8 8:00 p.m. or maybe it will be 8:10 after Mar that will be in Hebrew a that I give tonight a special for in Hebrew but it's in Hebrew uh up upstairs tonight up tomorrow so it will be 8 10 May okay but there's no summary at the end exactly okay so um what I would like to do today is to go through a very famous story that the K describes but it's being described in other sources in a different way and we need to try to understand what's the point of it what are the lessons and what can we learn from it okay so that's what we're going to do so let's uh let's take a look first at the K itself is what not Prophet my Palace exactly what is it's a name for the bet mikdash it's not only a in it's not a neighborhood in but is the the temple Bic the which means oh sorry thank you which means my Palace was desolated because of my sins and my tears will basically fall on my cheek and on this day what is cry cry very good sigh and cry I will raise my voice about it and I will um I will moan I will C for it for for many days on what like what's what exactly happened that you are so so sad my heart is broken and my heart is mourning and comfort there is no comfort and my pain cannot be compared to what to any other types of pain about what what's the case Al but RAB Ishmael kohen Gad because of the children of RAB Ismael kohen Gad the high priest their memory will be in my heart okay so this is the introduction which means this is about what two children who were the children of RAB Ismael kohen what are the names of his children we don't know according to the Kina we just know that they are about these two children of R is okay so what exactly happened there at Nish at the time that they were what they were captured and two different Masters bought them and they are neighbors who are neighbor the two masters which means they live next to each other and they are talking and they start telling to to each other what I captured a woman she is beautiful and he described her like Theon moon in the darkness and and she is gorgeous and she's beautiful so his friend told him ha you're telling me about this beautiful girl I'll tell you about what this very handsome um boy that I captured I came also from what from the capture of the Conquering of I capture the slave who has beautiful eyes he shines like a sun in the middle of the day and like the minute that the Sahar is the Le it comes to an end like like beautiful sight Okay so until now we are obviously said that uh she was captured he is captured and they are talking about them like two animals but until now it's not that n right okay so they came up with what with a beautiful idea I have a beautiful maid servant you have a beautiful slave let's put them together and the children will be beautiful and we will sell the children children but the problem is they're not only a slave and a made servant they are brother and sister the Masters don't know but that's obviously building up to the drama right so when you hear something like that your ears will burn and because of that when I remember that I'm going to tell my garments so when they agreed the two masters they took the slave and the maid servant and they put them together in one room and they told them you need to get together and she needs to get pregnant and the two masters who were two separate people now they have something in common so they they are so excited she's going to get pregnant and we going to sell the the children so what do they do the Son and the daughter they look at they don't we don't know if they look at each other or anything they just what they cry they cry and they cry B here so from the night until the morning he says I am the descendant of I mean this is unbelievable look at their self-esteem you are a slave you are captured in Jerusalem you were sold and he still think he's what he's a descendant of Aon says how can I a descendant of Aon aen can what marry a a slave woman she's also will cry out and say even though she's also a daughter of aen but she basically traced herself to Y moshe's mom because obviously moshe's mom when she had M and how can I marry what a Slave o I don't need to translate this is what Hashem decreed what is Stars so basically the entire uh what do you call it um the what do you call it the Galaxy okay there's consolation and everything all of them will cry to I didn't know there brother and S no not yet not yet now each one of them cry and they cry on themselves meaning he says how can I the descendant of Aon can marry slave woman and she said how can I descendant of can marry a slave or B ah the first light comes they recognize each other oh brother oh sister they hugged each other and they got what so there is a hug and then there is what is conect they got connected what does that mean physically spiritually what exactly going on here so they Soul Departed this is what will eulogize and will lament about this children of R okay I can tell you more terrible stories than this one thear can tell you more terrible stories about this one and and it seems to be that who wrote many of the Lamentations in that we borrow from we try to associate him with this case but this case is a very strange one leave alone the fact that uh if they cry and the Masters are like at the outside of the the entrance of the room they obviously can what can hear they don't check from time to time or they get they wanted to give them privacy I mean come on okay and then they cried and cried and their soul departed because they cried and that's how it's in a way it's a good ending they didn't need to do what the Masters asked them to do or commanded them to do and in a way they ended their life uh together and everything is like so what's I mean don't get me wrong it's it's terrible but we know about more terrible stories that happened took place in the time of the destruction of the of second betam mikdash okay but that's the now hold on with all the questions take a look at Mid mid I will tell you so you will have a little bit of a head start for tonight mid is a mid which means we have early M that's the second century starts let's say at the fifth century okay that'sa this one is around six seventh century okay so that's what we call Mid B okay six sth Century this is the mid okay so this mid says the following so first difference is what two sons two sons we have a daughter and a son the Kina right don't can't erase it whatever so I have crays here if you need no I have here too but but you can't erase you need to like sprit sprit water whatever uh yeah but I can't WR um do what wait should I get a paper towel no no no no no it will Takeo much you know what I'll just do it like I'll just do it like okay K I'll write it already Okay so Ben mid right he son okay you you need me to translate it or that's fine fine you can't read my handwriting so it's fine so that they were captured ah so from it started now we start with what with so we move to what to a male and a female okay a boy and a girl so each one of them fell as a spoil to one of the Masters it's like a commander in the Army now take a look at the story so the master who bought or captured the boy he went to a prostitute and instead of paying her money what did he do he gave her the boy now you can understand the the degration degration degradation of this of this person I mean he was the son of the Ken G was captured and now he's being so being exchanged for what for prostitution the other guy the other Master he took his maid servant that he captured the sister and he basically paid with her in order to get what wine in order to fulfill the prophecy they will throw a lot on my people they gave the boy in exchange of what of prostitution and the girl they sold for wine does she have to agree yes I would take that boy or can she say you know what I don't want a boy to raised so go away oh know she she got it she's like a slave he's like a slave he gave her to him he he the master gave it to the prostitute uh in exchange of the prostitution she didn't want him no one ask her no one ask her maybe she wanted him because he he will just uh no he will just uh walk for her he will clean he will he will cook I don't know whatever he will do so first and foremost we see a major difference between the midash and the Kina first the identity B there is really no description about their what looks their looks their beauty nothing it just what they were sold for nothing terrible treatment and for now we still don't have what any points of connections between them he sold her he sold him to a prostitute and she he sold her to to a grocery store a guy but you mean after a few days weeks whatever it was so this prostitute I guess she was a businesswoman she went to this ca ca is a someone who is has a very good taste it's being mentioned in for example if I need to know if there is enough let's say a piece of meat fell into a a pot of milk and I need to know if there is shim 60 pieces against this one I can't taste it right so what do I do I take a non-jewish taster which calleda someone who knows exactly The Taste and he can tell me what if it if it influen the P did not and now how can you trust him the answer is because he's such an expert he will not ruin his reputation so she goes to this guy and she told him look at it she the prostitute she says to the storekeeper or the this taster she says look I notice that what that your maid servant looks like what like my boy okay like my slave they look alike and you know what so she came up with the idea she says you know what they look like they look alike if they look alike so what so I don't know maybe they they they can Feit let make them what be together and they will have children and we will sell the children so that's what they did so what did they do they brought him into a room and they closed the door shat and I put you in a parenthesis sh meaning shat can be understood that she started or that she had some kind of a delay but then she started what did she do so the girl start crying l so the boy he didn't recognize her but he says to her what why are you crying stop here this is a major difference between what our story this story and the K in the k each one of them what cried for themselves and no one spoke no one spoke everyone was in a way focusing only on his or her pain here she start crying which is I know in the 21st century we probably should say what the te start crying right but she start crying and uh and he is the one to what to approach here okay that's sixth Century what do you want she says to him why am I'm crying I'm a daughter of the I'm going to marry a slave this is interesting why if you remember the K he was the one to say it very good not she she just said I'm a descendant of Y she didn't relate to the and here in the mid she's the one she has the the idea or the or the notion of royalty and not him man who is your father look at it I mean it seems to be that he has no clue my father is where exactly did you live what's your address we live in what in what level in the market like in the upper level lower level what does that mean meaning do you live in Baka or you live in katamon what is we live up Upstate New York okay we live where the wealthy people live Amala what apartment this is the address did you have a brother true do he have any birth mark that you can identify this brother by he had a little birth mark on his shoulder and when he used to come from the mid he would show his birth mark and I will kiss it a bit strange if I will show if someone will show you this Spirit mark would you recognize [Music] it so what did he do he uncovered his shoulder she saw this birth mark and they recognize each other they start hugging each other they start kissing each other start trying for each other the until they what their soul departed and the Holy Spirit comes and cry these are the people that I cry for why what do you think is more terrible this one or the first one we have a third one okay well let's do the third one let's do the third one and then we will compare all of them and try to understand what's the point of each one of them is Ben Elisha notok again two masters capture them happened to be that these two masters found themselves together in a in a place they were not neighbors they just found themselves somewhere at the same time at the same place one says I have a slave my gosh she is so handsome and the other guy says what M servant she's the most gorgeous woman ever right the first story is about luks the third story is about Luke wait wait wait we'll get them so let's get them together and share their children so they brought him into the room by the way you understand that this entire story no one could know about that story because of what no one was there in the room and no one survived from that room so no one knew that one sat in this corner and the other one sat in that corner and no one knew about the conversation so it's all what con it's someone to say a makeup story or you want to say an invention or you want to say whatever it is but there is obviously this is why we need to find the lesson that comes out from it so each one of them takes a corner this one says I'm a descendant of aen the son of aen son of a I'm going to marry a slave woman now there is equality she says the same thing I'm a descendant of what I'm going to marry a slave cried all night long when the first light came up the dawn they recognize each other so they recognized each other they cried with each other until their depart and this is the case where says these are the people that I cry my eyes will I have tears for them for eternity okay you see the in is very very short and undescriptive right so first and foremost we're going to do something interesting today hopefully if I would ask you what do you think will is the original story what would you say you have three stories the common denominator is what the goal the goal was to get them together to get her pregnant and to sell the children that's a common denominator between all the three stories if I would ask you what do what do you think is the first story the original story first second or third and tell me why first one first one the Kina yeah it's the third one is also they recognize each other right away um no even in the first one they didn't recognize each other right away only B only the only time the Second Story says that they recognize each other before right before the morning okay now you tell me um okay look at the second story for a second okay before we go to the first story and the third Story the third Story the third Story the third source of the story in my opinion the is the latest one okay is the latest the third one is the most not original in my opinion the second one is the original and why am I'm saying this so first and foremost do you see something interesting in mid do you see any change PTO suddenly there is a change don't look too hard just look at the at the text itself what do you see there that's that's true but b sometimes a person can call children exactly but there is a a really obvious thing there two obvious things go [Music] right okay I'll help you out a bit I thought you were saying that and then you deviated the midash begins with what with trying to find an explanation for a PUK what is the PUK the PUK is from yel they sold the boy for prostitution and they sold the girl for wine and then they are looking where exactly that PUK come from came from not came from that's from yel but when this was fulfilled answer ah this is the m m with the daughter and the son of radok who were captured they will try to put them together sorry they were um they were sold for what for prostitution and for wine set to that's it basically the midash found the case of what that explain the PUK okay so that's what the midash this also always what the midash is trying to do is to explain a PUK and see when exactly it happened okay now after that we will see the chapter in your so that's the first thing so what happened in the room is nowhere to be found yeah very good the beginning of the midash does not say anything about them getting together it just what that the midash the B midash heard somehow that one boy was sold for prostitution and the girl was sold for a barrel of wine ah I found the PUK in yel that was fulfilled and they brother and sister and they are brother and sister even though the PUK does not say that they are brother and sister it say what only what yed ve Al okay now interestingly enough and that's what I thought you would immediately say you see that there two languages here one is Hebrew and the other one is aramit okay so the story is in aramit okay now the story itself talks about something very interesting who was behind the idea this prostitute she was the one to initiate this entire thing right what the mid says she went to this thisani this guy who had a store and she told him let's get them together and what and sell the children now this is basically what a business deal between that prostitute and this guy okay dka in this mid this is all it's nothing about the look it's not about their beauty their beauty is not mentioned at all maybe they were not beautiful at all it was all about what business business productivity we will have more children we will have more slaves we will be will have more money okay I would like to suggest that because it's not about the look it's not about the external part it's more about the what the internal part this is how in this midash the first thing that we have is what she start crying when she start crying and now take a look at these two boys and girl I mean the boy and the girl she was captured she was sold for a barrel of wine okay he was captured was sold to a prostitute now they are both together and she's crying what does he do he addressed her he approaches s which means what despite the fact of what was done to him and to her we can see two things she cries which means she still has whats feelings and emotions still a woman and in addition to it what do we have he dka he instead of ignoring her or said to her woman what are you crying like now you now you you figure out that you need to cry look at our situation we are terrible we are in a terrible shape okay so let's get together mea you don't recognize me he didn't rec if he would not talk to her he would say to her what look if we're not going to get together and you're not going to get pregnant we are going to both be killed okay but instead what does he do he approach her and he says to her what why do you cry so what does she say this is this is an incredible thing she says why do I cry because look at my situation I am the daughter of a Coen who is a descendant of and I'm going to want to marry a slave lady what are you talking about what do you think you're going to marry a prince on a horse like this is your situation you are a m you are a slave woman you were sold you were sold you were captured and then you were sold and what do you think they will do with you but look what this midash is basically saying she had self-confidence self-confidence but he did not yet he had feelings he had sympathy but he already forgot he does not say in this midash what I am I am also a benen and I will tell you why in my opinion why in a minute basically she looks at herself as a descendant of the Ken G and he's trying to what to get some information so he says to her okay so what's your father's name where exactly did you leave and look at her she Shon yes she lived in h the most fancy neighborhood and then the moment of recognition now you tell me what do you do with the idea that he says to her would you be able to recognize your brother and she says yes first and foremost that seems to me like the brother was l L long time ago not the same time now she has more memories so she was older probably he was younger or he was already captured before her but he came from a bait midash which was a might be a child and he had a little birth mark now to have even a birth mark But to have a mark as a son of a Coen G what do you think do you think he had a chance no to become Coen Gad no he had a it's a not sure this is a mo that will totally disqualify you but I can tell you especially in the beta mdash second bet mikdash if you have this something like that oh they're going to give you hard time especially back then they were very fancy okay so basically they probably said few things about about his birth mark so my assumption this is my theory he was captured before her she lost her brother already long time ago and basically and this is something that it's uh I don't know it's a bit weird I'll put it like that he will come every time from the B midash and he will uncover his birth mark and she will give it a kiss that's it's she another sister I can see it how how yes I can see it I can see it too but I'm asking you him as a young kid and she's a little older it's you're fine you know you're wonderful very good so don't make it make it a romance don't make it something crazy I would say he was bullied was what bullied bullied bullied yeah and people made fun of him he would come and he would cry and she would say what what happened today they again made fun of your birth mark I I know maybe it was a major birth mark not like a little and she was said here I'll give you a kiss everything is okay now it's interesting she always comforted him in this situation what does he do he's the one to comfort her and then when he shows her this birth mark basically they start what hugging each other kissing each other crying and then as one their n departs so what exactly is the point of this mid first to understand the that they sold the boy for prostitution and the girl for wine that's a that's the most important thing of the mid then later on the midash wanted to us to to see what well if I would ask okay what's the point of the story to test what's the point of the story to test them for what recognition of one [Music] another what compassion I think compassion at times of tremendous stress unlike any other story that each one of them found a corner and didn't talk to each other only in the morning when they could recognize each other physically here he felt in this case in in the darkness still at night he found sympathy empathy to someone who is crying not knowing here he is a slave she is a slave woman and still he find in his inner Powers whatever it is to approach that girl and to try to comfort her which means this midash is trying to describe not so much the the terrible um um losing of lineage it was more about what the feelings that they had even in times of stress now let's take a look at the third one the gtin the basically it's like very dry so it's definitely not the original it's very dry she's beautiful he's beautiful let's get them together they recognize each other they she said how can I do that I'm a daughter of a he said how can I do that I'm a son of a CO so they recognize each other when only sh this entire story is very strange you want to tell me that they that they they put them after Sunset so I don't know let's say sunset today 7:45 so they put them together in the room at 9:00 900 p.m. okay Al is 4 405 I know Z is 554 okay no they are there for 7 hours they cry and cry they don't recognize each other by The Voice A and B for seven hours they CED none of them talk to each other and say like why are you who are you from you know what's the problem here obviously you see that this story is not so what's the idea here in what's the lesson that we need to learn like why why or the the the author of this of this paragraph in thear what does he want us to lament on on what on the loss of what Humanity of two children who had so much future PO he could be Coen she could be marry another Coen G or whatever it was and we lost it go to the first one excuse me I just ask in this generation how many just one or more don't understand the question just one coh over the time until he died pardon until he died in the second mdash there were too many because they couldn't finish the year because they bought it many of them bought it inash I think they were only or something like that in the mdash were because it also doesn't make sense because if one person says they the daughter or the son of then the other one's got to know if he's a son or daughter they must be related right agree but it can be that even in one generation they can have more than one I mean the guy died whatever it is not because of his sin just old age are very CL agree I understand so when you look at the at the first one the in the Kina obviously there is a buildup for what for how beautiful they were why do you think there is such a description makes you feel for the everyone like good looking people that's what it is those that are jealous of them it's human nature so there is a buildup towards they are so beautiful they are so beautiful and to put them together it would be wonderful if they were not brother and sister right the potential of beautiful children right so it's something that we are all like wow wow wow and we put them together and then they are crying and he the boy says I'm a descendant of Aon and she said I'm a descendant of what of Y how can we what get married okay I'll be together the problem with this the problem is that each one of them is so focused on what on themselves they don't see each other which is part of the issue of mikdash not being able to see the other thinking that you are the most beautiful person not only externally also internally you know what the naiv says the in his in his introdu to seph seph is is called also sephar the book of the upright it says who are the upright the upright are ab and why are they called upright yesim because they knew how to behave not only to theirselves and to others but also to the non-jews that's what the na says and then he says in the time of the bet mikdash the second mikdash there were but they were not yes that's what the na says they were righteous but they were not upright what does that mean says the na it's unbelievable what he says he says when I saw another Jew who didn't behave and acted exactly like me he couldn't accept him not only couldn't accept him not only criticize him I will kill him that's what the naiv says naiv quote they will go and beim they will slander them to the Mal or they will kill them by by themselves but but it's confusing because when you say sikim what that infers that they're righteous so they're not means today don't forget there is no m rules of of so I keep Shabbat the way I keep Shabbat that I got it from my parents and from the rabbi so and so and you keep Shabbat ly but then you don't accept my way and you start bed mouthing me and if you can you can even kill me what is the definition of a sadik sadik likeed he's doing what he was told to do not a sadik like a sadik yeah not a sadik of our like go by the justce so that's what the na says which is scary it's scary when you think about it the idea is what is that these two people people each one of them comes with a lineage and everyone is think about him or herself like the descendant of whoever but when they cry and they cry all night none of them think that what maybe I should approach the other person who is crying and ask him what why are you crying and then when they recognize each other only when the morning comes but that's too late why is that too late because in a minute the Masters are going to what to open the door and say no are you pregnant right so it's it's not going to I mean that's it their time is up so then they they kiss each other whatever they they hug each other which by the way here it says only only hugged each other in this in the midash it says what kissed each other cried with each other hugged each other you see how they a brother and sister and in the B he basically says what he it's very dry recognize each other hugged each other and cried together that's it now if you take a look in yel that's where the p in the mid came from so it says like that page two y per y has we don't know too much about this prophet yel but he says the following going to be those days which I will uh um bring the Exiles back to back to so I will gather all the and I will bring them down to the valley of I'm going to judge them for what they did to my people that they spread them all over the place and that they they divided my land and they basically threw a lot on my nation here is the meaning I going to judge them for everything that they did to my people that they exiled them that they divided the land and that they sold the boy for prostitution and the girl for wine why why blame blaming them why is he blaming the D people decreed that this should happen he decreed that the Jewish people should be exiled and the BET mikdash was destroyed like he decreed that am Israel will be enslaved in a foreign land he didn't tell them to throw the babies into the river that was their choice that is like at least according to the rambam basically what did you do you you say that what that you did my my my commandment no you took all the spoil you took it for yourself you enjoyed H inflicting pain on the Jewish people so turn to page three verse T second verse on the page is going to cry he's going to Roar from and you can hear his voice from and everything will be in chaos but is going to shelter his people he will be the strength for the Jewish people you should know that I am your God that I dwell in my Holy Mountain will be holy and strangers will not be able to pass through and on juice will come from the mountains from The Valleys you will have milk and all the valleys of will have water there will be a river from and will have water will beate place so will be punished will be punished will dwell forever and will be perpetuate for eternity and I will never forget the blood that was spilled and Hashem will dwell in now very soon in our times but before that this story that the midash talks about the boy and the girl it's from this PUK and this is very interesting cuz you're talking about what the expulsion the destruction the division of the land and everything and then you talk about what girl boy and a girl like talking about the national calamity and then you talk about a boy and a girl I think there is a point here really good point you know when we talk about the what do we always try to do focus on individual to talk about one individual two individuals three individ but individuals because if you talk about Millions you can't you can't grasp it so what do you do is you take one person you learn about him or her and you'll get connected the same thing here even though it's more than 2,000 years and we are a little distance from it but the idea of what kazal did which is brilliant they take a boy and a girl and you know what if it happened or didn't happen exactly like the the way it's described this is not the point the point is that you focus on what on two children always children has tremendous potential and especially if they are so good-looking and everything that the generations to come and they are descended of ofen and look what happened to them so first and foremost the fact that you have lineage and everything does not mean that what that you will escape a Calamity a b God does not only focus on National Calamity God also cares about what those individuals and I think this is a tremendous lesson for us because sometimes you just lose the ability to sense and to feel when he talks about so many people but when it comes to individuals then you can focus more and feel more so this like about Bas focus on on each and every one but it's more than he cares he cares about every individual and because sometimes you say okay no it's the nation but no no he cares about every individual and the lessons that we can learn from all the different types of stories is definitely the one that I really like to focus on is the idea of sympathy and empathy even at times of darkness and this is the second the Second Source that shows us how he approached her and in a way in exchange for the sympathy she showed him when he was what when he was a young when he was a young child that's for today