A G-d of Vengeance or Compassion? - By Rabbi YY Jacobson

The Yeshiva.net Good morning to one and all and welcome. So, imagine for a moment this scene. You're preparing your child for his bar mitzvah. And he says to you or to your husband, to his mother, or to his father, "I'm really incapable. I'm incapable for the job. I can't have a bar mitzvah. I can't get an aliyah. I can't make a brachah. I can't speak. I can't greet guests. Nothing. I just can't do it. Who am I? I'm I'm I'm worthless. I'm Nobody likes me. I'm insignificant." And you reassure him. You reassure him that he has the prowess, the power, the power, the ability, the potential. So, he comes and he says that uh nobody is going to listen to him. He can't communicate. And you reassure him that he will be able to communicate. And then the next thing he tells you is uh that he has terrible fear. He's paralyzed. And you reassure him that he can overcome the fear. And finally he'll tell you just just forget about it. I'm not doing it. You'll have it with another child. And at this point you lose it. You get furious and you get angry. and you scream at the child and he says, "Okay, I'll do it." Or you have a company, you have a business, and you want to bring in a child into the business, an older child. And the story repeats itself again. First he says, "I'm just incompetent." And you assure him that he's competent or she's competent. And then the person, the child, says, "All the other employees despise me. They will hate me. They don't want young blood. They will be jealous of me. They'll throw me out. They'll be unsuccessful." And you say, "No, they want young blood. They want young blood. They want somebody like you." And then he'll tell you, "But I can't talk. I can't communicate." And I need to for the job. When you assure him that he can. And finally he just says, "Just go hire somebody else." So papa or mama just gets angry and gets furious and starts screaming at him. And he says, "Okay." The problem in both of these stories is that what persuaded what what persuaded the young man or woman to embrace their position was your fury, your anger, not logic, not warmth, not persuasion, but rather anger. And whenever anybody does something because somebody else is angry, how much heart can they put into it? If the only reason I accept the position is because I am terrified of your anger, so how much enthusiasm can I bring to the work? How much gusto? How much oomph, how much creativity can I bring to the task at hand if the only factor that motivated me to get into it was avoiding your fury, your anger. So, if it comes to washing dishes or your daughter cleaning up her room, so maybe it will work. She'll do the job and clean up her room because mama lost it. And when mama loses it, it ain't fun. So, just to get the house a little more silent, I'll clean up the room. Okay. But if I want somebody to accept a long-term job, I don't think I will be successful in having them doing a good job, a effective job, if the only thing that can get them to do it is my fury. Would you agree with me? Yes. Which, if this is true and you agree with me, it becomes profoundly perplexing to dissect and analyze what convinced Moshe Rabbeinu, the great hero of parshas Shmois, Va'eira, Bo, Beshalach, and really the rest of Torah, from the beginning of Shmois, the primary character becomes Moshe Rabbeinu. There's not a parsha in which his name is not mentioned, and not once, but numerous times, besides one, parshas Tetzaveh, and even there the whole parsha is about him, Va'ata Tetzaveh. It's just his name is not mentioned. But really, from parshas Shmois, Moshe, so to speak, becomes the central figure who liberates the Jewish people from slavery, from bondage, molds them into a nation, takes them out of Egypt, crosses a sea with them, brings them to Sinai, leads them 40 years through the desert, at the banks at the Arvot Mo'av, at the bank at the at the bank of the Jordan, where he will ultimately pass on and allow his successor to continue the journey, but not anymore in the Chumash, in the Tanakh, in Sefer Yehoshua. And when we analyze and dissect how this man got the job, how he assumed the position, how did it come about? It becomes not only perplexing, but deeply disturbing and deeply enigmatic. The story is already recorded in Shemot, and it continues in Va'eira, and it continues in Bo. Moshe is really minding his own business. He's shepherding the flock of his father-in-law in the desert, in the wilderness, but he sees the famous vision in the burning bush. And at that vision, Hashem summons him and says, "I have heard the cry of my children, and I want to send you to the Pharaoh to liberate them from bondage." And Moshe's response is immediately, "No way. This is not for me." And he explains to the Ribono shel Olam why it's not for him. He says, "Mi ani anochi? Who am I? Who am I? Where did I suddenly become the human being who is designated for this job? I am incompetent. This is completely not me." So, Hashem reassures him. He says, "I will be there with you. I will accompany you. I will go with you." So, Mosha is not convinced. He says, "I don't have what to tell them." "They're going to ask me, who's this God? What's his name? I don't have what to say." "I'm ignorant as to what to say." He says, "I'll tell you what to say." He tells him what to say. After this, Mosha comes up with a new situation. And what does he say? "They ain't going to believe me." "They'll mock me. They'll make fun of me. They won't accept me. My my mission will be futile. The nation will not be mobilized by me." And Hashem gives him a whole series of miracles and wonders and assures him that they will believe him. So he comes up with a new one. Number four. And that is "You forgot? I don't even know how to talk. I'm not a man of words." "I have a heavy mouth. I have a heavy tongue. I can't communicate." This is already rationale number four. I'm not the man. First he said, "Who am I?" "I'm not capable." Hashem said, "I'll be there with you." Then he said, "I don't have what to say. They'll ask me for your name." He answers. Then he says, "Nobody's going to accept me." "They'll accept you." "BUT I CAN'T TALK." SO HASHEM answers him in his famous answer. He says, "Who makes anybody talk? I make people talk. I can make you talk, too." You would think he ran out of excuses. So after everything, he comes up with number five and he says, "Just send somebody else." "Just take somebody else for the job." What happens at this point? I quote. I hear a day no emotion. I don't remember. God becomes furious at Mosha. And he says, your brother Aaron the Levite, I know that he will speak, he will present to you. He's going to come greet you and he's going to rejoice in his heart that you have been given this position. Don't be afraid of older brother jealousy. After all, Mosha is the baby in the family. And Aaron is going to look at the baby in the family who has risen to such power. It's not easy for every older brother to digest that type of phenomenon, that type of experience, but not your brother Aaron. And the conversation is over. Mosha comes back to his father-in-law and he says, I want to go back to Egypt and his mission begins. So, how did the Rebbe convince Mosha? He got angry at him. All the conversations were futile. Rashi says the conversations went on for a week. This wasn't in one day. For 7 days, back and forth, back and forth. Hashem says, yes. Mosha says, who am I? Hashem says, I'll be there with you. He says, I don't have what to say. I don't know your name. I'll tell you your name. Mosha says, nobody believes me. They'll believe you, he says. I don't know how to talk. YOU'LL KNOW HOW TO TALK AND THEN HE SAYS, JUST HIRE SOMEBODY ELSE. SO, God gets angry. He gets angry. So, Mosha is like, okay. Granted. Hashem's anger caused him to take the job. But, it seems a little strange because what type of passion do you bring again to a mission or to a task that you really don't want? You really don't feel you're equipped for. You really don't feel is right for you. You don't feel you're competent, you're capable. And the only reason you finally accepted it was because of in this case Hashem's ire. Ire as in ire, anger, fury. Or in Yiddish, sodden. In the Chumash in Yiddish, how do they translate "af Hashem b'Moshe"? That Abersht is sodden hot gebrent in Moshe, right? You remember? You weren't listening. That's why you were thrown out. Okay. In Yiddish, sodden, right? It's wrath, wrath. God's wrath. But this is the question. Can you really motivate somebody and have them redefine their life's mission based on your anger? This is not asking Moshe to clean up his room or do his homework or get into bed. And even then, you know how much anger helps and for how long. I think some of us have experience. There was once a teacher who asked all the students to write down on a piece of paper what they would like to be when they get older. So each child wrote something else, you know, one writes a fireman, a policeman, an architect, an engineer, an astronaut. One little girl wrote when she gets older, she wants to be possible. So the teacher said, "What does this mean?" She said, "My mother tells me every night that I'm impossible. So when I get older, I hope one day I'll be able to be possible." So if I tell somebody, "You're impossible. You're getting really, really angry." So, maybe short-term it could be effective on some level. Again, this you'll speak to great pedagogues who teach you how to run serene and tranquil homes. But, for a long-term task for something that is going to define you for the rest of your life something that you have to put your soul into it will turn you into a new human being and it will require endless self-sacrifice unlimited commitment, unwavering determination almost infinite selflessness. You can't inspire such a task through anger. Doesn't work. Never happened. And yet a simple reading of the story seems that was the only thing that got Moshe ultimately to say, "Yes." And Hashem would not force him to do it. He needed Moshe to agree. He needed Moshe to agree, but how? No logic in the world can persuade him. Interesting, God, the creator of logic, the creator of emotion, could not persuade Moshe. The only way he could do it was through fury. I We get angry because we basically have no other alternatives. You patience plost. You have a migraine headache. You thought the day was done and you could crawl into bed with your teddy bear, whatever that looks like. And suddenly your teenage sophisticated child is really getting on your nerves. Or your 8-years-old, which is today also a teenager. Or your 4-year-old, which I think today is also a teenager. So, we lose it. And at some point, arguments, persuasions, conversations, love, empathy, caring, reading books, listening to books, sitting on the couch, smiling, nurturing, nurturing, nurturing, so plost. It plosts, you lose it, and you scream and you holler and you get angry. And sometimes if you do it often enough, they don't even respond. It's just what Tati or Mommy does. It just becomes music to people's ears. And the more you scream, the more interesting the music becomes. And if you don't do it that often, okay, you may get a response. But you would think from God's perspective there should be he should have more tricks up his sleeve or more resources within himself to be able to really persuade Moishe to do this. So, I want to share with you an insight by the Kotsker Rebbe which is quoted in a famous book known as Siach Sarfei Kodesh. Which is a Polish Hasidic work that uh compiles many of the sayings, insights of Reb Simcha Bunim of Pshiskha of the Kotsker Rebbe, of the Yid Hakodesh, of the Chidushei Harim, of some of the great uh masters, spiritual masters who lived in Poland in the 19th century. The Kotsker Rebbe's name was Reb Menachem Mendel Morgenstern. Morgenstern. Reb Menachem Mendel Morgenstern lived in Kotsk in Poland and he passed away on the 22nd day of Shvat, Chof Beis Shvat approximately Taf Resh Yud Tes, I think 1859 or so. And uh already in his time he was a legend due to his penetrating and very sharp and truthful insights. And certainly in this insight he does not fail us or disappoint us. And he has a fascinating insight on the story of how Moshe was chosen. And he suggests that the problem is translation once again. As I mentioned to you more than once, all translations fail. Not because the translator has ill intent. He or she may have the best of intentions, but by the nature of translation, you lose a lot of the original impact and sometimes the very meaning. And here is a classic example. How do we translate Hashem and Moshe? Probably any English translation, I don't have one open before me, but probably any English translation, although I'm sure they vary, more or less will convey the same message. The Lord or God got angry at Moses, at Moshe. Or Hashem's wrath burned against Moshe. His anger burned on Moshe, against Moshe. That's how it's translated. And I think probably in most schools, that's how the is explained. Hashem and Moshe, Hashem got upset at Moshe. He got angry at Moshe. His wrath burned against Moshe. How can you refuse me again and again? But the Kotzker Rebbe points out that it's really a very inaccurate translation. He says, read the words very carefully and you'll see a completely different translation. Now, I'm going to change the subject now in order to give context to what he's saying and go to another pasuk which we're all very familiar with, I believe, because we say it every day. Some of us say it twice a day. Some of us say it three times a day. And this is in Krias Shema. The second parsha of Krias Shema V'haya im shamoa tishmeu also speaks about Hashem's wrath. And it reads, V'haya im shamoa tishmeu el mitzvosai asher anochi metzaveh eschem hayom l'ahavah es Hashem elokeichem Meaning, if you will listen to the commandments of God and love him and serve him with all your heart, then I will give you rain, you will collect your grain, your oil, your wine. I will give grass to your animals, you will eat, you will be satiated, etc. Be careful. If your heart will go astray and you will serve other gods and you will prostrate yourselves to them, then what will happen? The wrath of God will burn against you. And the results will be catastrophic. He'll block the heavens, there won't be any rain. Thank God today is not such a day. He's obviously not upset. The earth won't produce its yield. You will perish swiftly from the good land that he's giving you. And now he shifts back as though nothing happened. Very positive, put these words on your heart and on your soul. Now usually the shift from wrath to love is a complicated one. When you get very, very angry at your children and you lose it for a few minutes and you scream, it's very difficult within the same sentence almost like, "And now you should serve me with all your heart and with all your soul and bind me on your heart and between your eyes and you'll be blessed." Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Let's first detox a little bit. But in Krias Shema there's almost no break. Not almost, there's no break. I mean, it's from pasuk to pasuk. You'll perish, you'll be thrown out, and then away, with some tenderness and put it on your hearts and on your souls, bind it on your hands, between your eyes, teach it to your children, when you're laying down, when you're getting up, write it on your doorposts, so that your life and your children's life will increase on the land that Hashem has sworn to give in you as the days of heaven and earth on earth. That's the end of the second part of Krias Shma. Here again, v'charah af Hashem bachem. God will be upset, angry, furious at you. Many of you say Krias Shma you assume, right? Do you think about these words v'charah af Hashem bachem when you say them? Or it's just It's like when your mother starts screaming. You used to it a little bit, right? You used to it. When you think about it, what type of feeling does it leave you with? It's hard to love people who are always furious at you, you know? What do you think? No? If you grew up in a home where your parents were often very, very angry, what did it do? What do you think it does to children who grew up in a home where it's so hard to find mommy happy or father happy. There's a lot of anger, whether pent up or expressive, whether implosive or explosive. It's a difficult environment to be in. What about if you work in an environment and your boss is just furious, angry? It's difficult. It's hard. Even if there's justifications for the anger, there's always reasons, justifications. But it's hard to build a relationship based on anger. Would you tell your child, "You better do this cuz if not, I'm going to be very angry"? What does that do? What does that accomplish? Is it a way of building a relationship? I mean, we get angry. We're human. We get angry. What does it even mean that God gets angry? What is it about anger? I mean, if you would ask your therapist about anger, what would he or she tell you? Is it about you or is it about the other person? What will they tell you? Anybody ever asked their therapist about their anger? They'll always talk about you. It's about your response. It's about how you're processing it. If you'll get wholesome, if you'll be more wholesome, you'll be able to deal with it, right? So, my question is, what did God's therapist say? He's the most wholesome. Why is he getting upset? Why is he getting angry? Why is Hashem getting so angry? Why is he getting so upset? I want to ask a third question today. Those who daven, remember in the morning there is a melody that the Leviim would sing every day of the week in the Beis Hamikdash. I don't know if you know, but in the Beis Hamikdash there was a concerto every single day. Morning, not once. Who goes to a symphony once a day? You go to a symphony twice a day. In the morning and in the afternoon. Right? I mean, like as is your custom. In the morning, there was a symphony, and the symphony was a very impressive symphony. You can have up to 120 vocalists. 120 vocalists in the Beis Hamikdash besides those playing the instruments. And it was absolutely beautiful, exquisite music in the morning and in the afternoon every day. And uh the vocalists would sing what we call the Shir Shel Yom. Now, I know the Shir Shel Yom, the song of the we say in davening, doesn't sound so exciting. But in the original Shir Shel Yom, it was absolutely uh saturated with ecstasy. On the fourth day, Wednesday, the Shir Shel Yom is basically a chapter of Tehillim. Like every day. The chapter of Tehillim of Shir Shel Yom Revi'i BaShabbos is, you remember how it begins? Eil Nekamos Ado-nai, Eil Nekamos Hofi'a. Hinosei'i Sheifet Aretz, Hashiv Gemul Al Gey'im. Translated, God is a lord of revenge. If you didn't hear it the first time, Dovid HaMelech makes sure to repeat himself. The God of revenge has appeared. Okay? So, he gives a definition. God came, Hashem Nekamos Hashem. Kail Nekamos Ado-nai, Eil Nekamos Eil Nekamos Ado-nai, Eil Nekamos Hofi'a. Kail Hashem is a God of Nekamos, of revenge, of vengeance. And again, Kail Nekamos, the God of revenge, appeared, Hofi'a. Hofi'a is like in Hebrew, Hofa'a, he emerged. He revealed himself. He's here, he's present. You go down that Mizmor, do you remember the last verse of that chapter of Tehillim? What? L'chu Neranena L'Ado-nai, Nari'a L'Tzur Yisheinu. Nekadma Fanav Besoda, Bizmiros Nari'a Lo Ki Keil Gadol Ado-nai U'Melech Gadol Al Kol Elohim. Now come and let's dance to God. Let's celebrate for the rack of our salvation. Let's greet his face with gratitude. With melodies we shall sing and celebrate to him. Isn't there something off here? I mean, imagine you tell your daughter, "Let me tell you something about Mommy. Mommy is a mommy of revenge. That's what she does. And if you didn't hear it once, I'll say it again. And one day the revenge will appear, the vengeance will be there. And now, come dance with me." Come, let's dance, let's celebrate. Now, Okay, you're a god of revenge. You pay back. Nothing goes unaccounted for. I got that. You take revenge. We have in Humash, Kel Kanah, v'notein. We say in the Gemara Shalach, v'nakeh lo yenakeh. Kel nekamos Hashem. I got it. But, it's very hard to tell me right afterwards, "Now, come dance with me." You have to admit, it triggers somewhat of a distance. Maybe an important one, maybe a necessary one, but it triggers distance, it triggers a negative feeling. And yet, in the same capital, David Hamelach has no qualms. SAYS, "L'CHU NERANENA. YOU HEARD? NOW, LET'S GO DANCE." A bisl modern, no? Now, many of us as kids had these questions. But, when we ask these questions, those of us who asked these questions, the response was usually not very kind. We got a message very fast that if we don't want revenge taken against us, we better be quiet. So, we learned to stop asking. Some of us never stop asking, but we don't hope for an answer. And others who wanted to fit in a little more learned how to stop asking. Which is a wonderful, wonderful way of uh dying. Because living people ask questions. Living people tell stories. Living people are curious. They challenge themselves. They could challenge others as well. So, these are very basic questions, are very primal questions. Why is God getting angry? Why is God taking revenge? Don't we always talk about revenge as a bad thing? Isn't there a mitzvah lo yishkon, don't take revenge? So, why is Hashem taking revenge? It's his mitzvah. So, I'm not allowed to take revenge, and he is allowed to take revenge? And generally, what type of people take revenge? Where do you think revenge comes from? Why do we take revenge? Those of us who take revenge, we hold grudges and we take revenge. What you did to me 12 years ago will never be forgotten, and I will pay back. I will remember it and I will pay back. The Torah says Excuse me, the Torah says lo yishkon u'lo yisitor. But the Torah of the Tanakh makes sure to know that Hashem to tell us that kein nikamah Hashem, kein nikamah if you On this, there's an interpretation of the Baal Shem Tov. The interpretation of the Baal Shem Tov is quoted by his student whose name was Rabbi Yaakov Yosef, the Rav of Polonne. Polonne is a city in the Ukraine. The Rabbi of Polonne was a man named Rabbi Yaakov Yosef. He has a safer called Toldos Yaakov Yosef. He was one of the great students of the Baal Shem Tov. And in Toldos Yaakov Yosef in Parshas Bo, he says shamati mi moirei, I heard from my teacher, from the Baal Shem Tov, an explanation on this possuk. And actually, uh, on Thursday, I had the privilege of being in the Baal Shem Tov's shul, the actual place where the Baal Shem Tov davened for maybe 20 years, and learned, and taught, in the city of Mezhibozh, in the Ukraine. So, we davened Mincha over there. So, after Mincha, I said, "Let's sit and we'll learn a little bit." So, I copied some teachings of the Baal Shem Tov scattered in different works of his students, and I said, "You know, I don't know where these Torahs were said, but many of them could have been said right here in this shul, by the Baal Shem Tov to his students, because his students say, 'We heard this from our from our teacher.'" And the primary place where he would teach was in that shul. So, one of the Torahs I taught was this Torah from Toldos Yaakov Yosef in Parshas Boi. And it was a very, uh, a profound, emotional, and moving experience to be able to teach it, or think about it, internalize it, share it, in the very place where the master presented it. And this is his teaching. It's It's I love the teaching, not only because it's a beautiful teaching, but also it teaches you how one Jew could look at the same thing that everybody else looks at, but just see a whole different experience. And for this, I'm going to employ another metaphor of the Baal Shem Tov, who once shared the following story, the anecdotal story. He said there was a musician standing in the square of the city playing music. And he was an extraordinary musician. When you heard his music, you could not remain apathetic. You could not remain unmoved. Again, if you have an ear for music. Some people are tone deaf, and no music could move them. Fine. So, they do other things, you know, chocolate mousse, whatever. But uh But if you have a a soul for music, you know, music is very very deep. Right? The There's a famous safe from Megillas Esther by Reb Alkabetz. He is the composer of Lecha Dodi, Friday night. He has a beautiful beautiful commentary on Megillas Esther. And he says that in the party, the feast that Achashverosh made, he did everything. He provided the guests with everything. The scribes, right? V'hashkos bichlei zahav, ukhelim mikhelim shonim viyein malchus rav k'yad hamelech. V'hasiya khados einoynis. It was beautifully designed. There was endless design, endless food, endless drinks. Everybody He wanted everybody to have the time of their life. He was a paranoid king and he wanted everybody to have a good time. It's like people who throw parties simply because they need it for validation. That is what Achashverosh was all about. And Reb Alkabetz asks, why was there no music? Why does there no music in the Megillah? And he says something very interesting. He says that children love music and they love singing. Children will start dancing when there's music. And he says the reason is because neshamos sing all day. That's what they do. They don't do other things. Souls sing. Once you're born, you learn to kvetch. But souls sing. That's what they do. So, he says children who are closer to the time when they were just souls, music is very natural for them. And that's why he says music is a very spiritual experience. And Achashverosh, his attempt was to distance Jews from their soul. And therefore, he no music, any type of music is not not what he wants at the party. That's what he says. So, the Balshem Tov says this person was playing music and everybody was stopping and listening. And at some point, they you know, you you even unconsciously you start swaying, you know, you start swaying to the to the sound and you start singing even if you're not the fully aware. And he says, "Before they know it, they were all dancing and leaping, swaying and dancing from this music." And he says, "One man walks by and he looks at everybody and he says, 'You all went crazy. This is a meshuggener place. I thought I was living among civilized, responsible people. Imagine, in the middle of the city, in the middle of the square, people are just dancing.'" He says, "You all went off your rocker. You all need emergency help. I'm the only normal man who remains in the city." The Balshe Tov says there was only one detail missing and that is nebach this person was deaf. He was deaf. Very innocent, but he couldn't hear. So, all he saw was crazy people dancing. From his perspective, crazy they were. When you don't hear the music, crazy you are. But for somebody who hears the music, it's a different reality. So, sometimes in life there are two people. They're both in the same reality, but one has antennas that hear the music. So, it's a whole different life. The other person doesn't have that. So, therefore, their response is based on that state of consciousness. So, sometimes you could see or hear a person who hears music. And when they hear music, everything changes. That's what I like very much about all of the Balshe Tov's teachings, but also this one especially. You'll hear in a moment what he does with it. So, this is what he teaches. This is what our holy master teaches. He says, "The clue is that the names of Hashem don't seem to fit the message of the pasuk because we know Hashem has different names. What is the name that represents midas of war, the attribute of discipline, of strength? Which name? Elokim. Kel is associated with chesed. It says in Tehillim, chesed Kel kol hayom. Kel is associated with grace, with kindness, with love. Yud Kay Vav Kay is associated with midas harachamim. Rashi says it in the beginning of parshas Va'eira. Elokim is midas hadin. Judgement, discipline, harshness. Yud Kay Vav Kay is the attribute of compassion, of empathy. He says, "You have all the wrong names here. Kel nakamos Hashem. Kel nakamos sefiya. You start off with Kel, then you get to Yud Kay Vav Kay. The wrong names. Speak about nakama. But give me the right name." Kel nakamos Elokim. Elokim nakamos. However you you'll phrase the pasuk, both names associated with chesed and rachamim are introduced here. Baal Shem Tov says, "This is the clue to understand the pasuk." In fact, David Hamelech is almost questioning himself and challenging himself before he gives the answer. That's number one. There's another problem, and that is the redundancy. Why the need to be repetitive? Kel nakamos Hashem hofi'a. You don't even need Hashem. Kel nakamos sefiya. The God of revenge appeared. And when he appears, it spells trouble. Things are going to change. Not Kel nakamos Hashem. Kel nakamos sefiya. Wrong names and repetitiveness, both in the names and in the word nakamos. So after hearing the Baal Shem Tov, that the meaning of the pasuk has to be understood very differently. David Hamelech says, "Let me tell you something how it works. Kel nakamos. God is a God of revenge. But the nakamos Kel, it's chesed. And not only it's Khasid, it's Yud Kay Vav Kay, it's Rakhamim. So now you're going to ask me, this doesn't make sense. The juxtaposition is off. If it's Kel and Hashem, it's not Nikamas. So David Hamelech says, let me explain to you what Nikama means, what revenge means. Kel Nikamois. What do I mean that God is a God of revenge? Ho Ifia, he appears. That's what I mean by revenge. And he gives a metaphor. I'll use my own words for the metaphor, but the the core of the metaphor belongs to the Baal Shem Tov. The Toldos Yaakov Yosef says he heard it from his mouth. He heard it from his teacher. So imagine in life you're in the dumps. I don't mean you, but imagine somebody is literally in the dumps. The dumps shabbi dumps shabbi dumps. Physically, emotionally, psychologically, depressed, hope helpless, without a way out. And a person comes into your life and you don't even know how that person literally saves you. What they do, perhaps behind your back without you knowing, an angel, a guardian angel that comes into your life, steps in and changes your life from darkness to light. Shleps you out from the abyss and brings you to paradise. It could be physically, it could be spiritually, it could be psychologically, be emotionally. And some of you sitting in this room know that you have had one person or two people or three in your life who have had a tremendous positive impact. Just like you may have had one, two, or three have had tremendous negative impact. Which is maybe why you come to this sheer. You also have perhaps one or two or three people or more. I don't know, more, that would be pretty big. But some of us you could point and say, this person changed my life. I would have never been where I am without for this person." They may know that they changed my life. They may not know that they changed my life. And I'll tell you an interesting thing. It is most likely that the person who changed your life does not know what they did for you. They don't know how deep they they impacted you in a positive way. And the reason is cuz most of us don't give genuine feedback to the people who matter to us most. You think right now about one or two or three people who transformed your life in a significant way, in the very positive. Did you ever share it with them? Did you ever go over to them and tell them specifically what they did for you at this particular point or what they continue to do for you? A relative or not a relative? A relative, a friend, or somebody maybe out of the blue. Maybe something that was a small thing they did, but it changed something for you. Or something large that they did. Or something large that they continue to do. Sometimes you even sit somewhere and you may hear something or you may read something. That person may not even know that they wrote it or said it. But for you, it triggered an awakening, an arousal of consciousness that nothing is the same again. But how would they know? They would never know. Which is, by the way, why in Parshas Balak it's called Balak. Moshe it's the only time, I don't know I don't know I don't feel so comfortable using the word, but we you see what we would call today symptoms of depression. It's the only time Moshe asks God to kill him. Right? In Balak, he says, "Hargeni not harog." Kill me. Murder me. Only once. He went through hard times, Moshe. But he only asked once to be to be dead. And what does Hashem do? How does Hashem respond to that? Very interestingly, the way he responds to it is he basically says, "Bring in 70 of your students. And what is what's going to happen is I'm going to allow your spirit to be shared with them and they will begin prophesizing. And after that, everything changes. What happened? What happened was suddenly Moshe Rabbeinu saw 70 people who prophesized because of him who became prophets. He suddenly saw 70 souls whom he transformed forever. He suddenly saw the impact he had and he couldn't say anymore to God kill me. My life is worthless. My life is futile. And you'll know great people suffer from these crises more than other people because they invest more and they're more sensitive. But most people don't get feedback. Most people don't give feedback. They give feedback, you know, whatever when they they shout they say it's good, which is important. It's important. But you'll see, look at your own life. The biggest events that shaped you, have you given feedback to the people responsible for them? And if not, you should consider doing it. Because you don't know what they're going through. And even if you do know, it's irrelevant. This is an important representation of of human reaction. How did I get into feedback? No, I need I need a scientist here who follows not with your emotions. Huh? That I know, but before that. Ah. Ah, very good. You take notes, very good. Thank you for taking notes. Nothing like a notebook. So, you were in those dumps or somebody you know, and this person, man or woman, steps in and did everything. But, it sometimes you know about it, sometimes you don't know about it. You don't know. Sometimes people change that we can't give feedback cuz we don't know. We don't know what they did behind the back. Sometimes you discover something a husband or a wife did for a spouse that they'll never know. Sometimes for a child, they'll never know. Sometimes a child for a parent, they will never know. And sometimes a friend. Yes, we do live in a culture where we often make sure to tell the people what we did for them. Or as Oscar Wilde says, the best feeling in the world is to do something anonymously and then have everybody find out. Right? There's nothing like that feeling. So, I'M BOTH A MARTYR, BUT also a hero. I'm both the greatest ba'al chesed in the world in this century. I'm sorry, in this century. I'm sorry, in the millennium. But, everybody of course knows. So, I can go to sleep telling myself I'm the greatest, but I'm also so, so humble. Cuz I didn't do it for name recognition. Okay, so that works. Oscar Wilde understood it well, at least he was honest about it. Not all of us are honest about it. But, sometimes I don't know. And what do they say in English? It's actually a midrash. The midrash says, when you do somebody a big favor, it's an old Yiddish saying, give them little stones. Why? Cuz when they start throwing stones on you, it should be small stones so they don't hurt. No good deed goes unpunished. And sometimes subconsciously when I save somebody's life, they can't forgive me for it. Because it's too vulnerable. And therefore they end up hating me. That's one of the sad realities of life. Sometimes the people you love most end up hating you most. Not because you are the problem. Sometimes that's also part of the problem. The love is very convoluted and then abusive, but I'm not talking about that. I'm talking about somebody who is really there for somebody else, but psychologically it's very hard to be vulnerable. So therefore I have to turn you into a crook and a snake. And I have to say the reason you helped me was for your own ulterior motives or because you had other agendas or really you had a whole other bias. So that way I don't owe you anything. Subconsciously we do this all the time. It makes us feel better about ourselves when we don't have to attribute profound transformation to another person. Which of course Leah names her son Yehuda Hashem. Yehuda means gratitude. And somehow that became the name of our people. A Jew is Yehudi. In fact, the word Jew comes from Judah which is Yehuda which comes from the word Hodah gratitude. Why is the name of the Jew associated with gratitude? Yes, Judaism believes in gratitude, no question, but that is our name. But the answer is because gratitude is a very profound experience. It's that ability to be able to display a vulnerability that is very very profound and many people subconsciously will hate you for saving them even if they don't know it. As somebody once said to me, "Rabbi Jacobs, I don't know why this guy hates me. I never did him any favors." May live I would have helped him. I understand he hates me. I never did anything for him. Vos I helping him a friend? I said, "You probably thought of doing him a favor." Some people are so sensitive. For the thought of trying to save his life, he already hates you. Don't worry. Don't take it so It's fine. It's not about you. May over the hack money. Sometimes when you tell me who your enemy is, I'll tell you it's a compliment. Depends who. Depends who. You know what I mean? Always say, as a Jew, you want to know what Jews are? Look who hates them. Look who hates Jews, and you'll see if it's good to be a Jew or bad to be a Jew. When you see that the greatest enemies of the Who the greatest enemies of the Jewish people were and are, you understand that there's something very holy about Jews. Even if we don't see it, but there's something very holy about Jews. Just look who hates Jews, and you'll see it right away. Okay. So, now what happens? You saved somebody's life, and they don't know it. And they are unhealthy. So, they manipulate, they backstab, they do everything wrong to this person who did so much for them. But, your love is endless, and you're wholesome. Because you're wholesome, you don't become a martyr. And even if you're not getting the recognition you need, you'll continue to give. You'll continue to give because you do not get abused through giving because your sense of confidence does not come from another person telling you how great you are. Which is a good way to live. Your sense of confidence not coming from other people giving you accolades. Even though we love accolades, but if that can happen, you capable of giving much more. Because the expectation is not so profound, and the void is not so profound. So, it doesn't doesn't get pursued with anger. You're wholesome with yourself. And when you do goodness, you're very wholesome with it. It's fine. It's almost like you do it in your relation part of your relationship with God and without becoming this selfless delusional martyr. But this person doesn't know. They backstab. They cheat you. They manipulate you. They deceive you. And then one day the Bashe Tov says, they open their eyes and they find out what you did for them. And he says, "Do you understand the shame that they experience that day? They look at themselves and they say, 'I cannot believe that this is the person I despised. This is the person I loathed. This is the person I abused. This is the person I hated.'" He said, "It's very, very shameful. It's very, very painful. Why? Because you suddenly discover the distortion. Sometimes we build up fantasies about people and it allows us to perpetuate negative feelings towards them. People do it towards their siblings, towards their brothers-in-law, sisters-in-law, grandchildren, the biggest in-laws. And it's all very often family or friends or people in our community. You have these grand images that you build up about them. You already convinced yourself 29 years ago that this person is a helpless narcissist. And now everything just fits into your image. Every Sheva Brachas reaffirms how narcissistic this relative is. Every bar mitzvah, every chasan, every simcha, every Shabbos, every Here she goes again, the yachna. You already expect a certain response and it goes right into your box. But one day, one day, some sometimes, maybe you're right. But sometimes you wake up one day and you change. You open your eyes. You're in a different place. And you look at the person and you say, "You know, I really knew nothing about them." I was simply viewing them from a very, very confined box. I knew nothing about them. And they may have actually done tremendous amount for me, and not only did I not appreciate it, I did the exact opposite. It's very deeply hurtful. So, like the Baal Shem Tov, this is what David Hamelech says. Kel Mekam Hashem. Let me tell you how God takes revenge. Kel Mekam, you know how he takes revenge? Hofeia. He shows up in your life. That's it. He shows up. One day you discover how much he loves you. One day you discover how deep his bond with you is. One day you discover how profound the relationship is. One day you discover that your biggest fan, your best friend, is God, even more that is the essence of your soul, of everything that you love about yourself. The Baal Shem Tov says that Nekama is Kel. That Nekama is Hashem. It's a different type of revenge. It's the revenge that doesn't come because I'll show you who's boss. It's a different type of Nekama. We call it revenge. David Hamelech says the best name I can have for it is Hofeia. Hashem shows up. One day you open your your eyes are opened and you understand and you experience the intimacy of the relationship. The love of the relationship. The infinite energy in the relationship. But I never felt it. There was so much toxicity in me. There was so much self-hate that I projected back on God that he became the greatest enemy of mine. But one day I fear he reveals himself. And then when I realize that, I'm like, "Wow, where was I all these years?" And then every he says every avera, every sin, everything that I did to betray my soul, to betray Hashem, there's an element of deep shame. That's the nakama. Kale nakama is Hashem. It's a nakama that comes from shame chasad, from shame rachamim. How is that? Because it's a fear. He appears. The appearance makes all the difference. Suddenly, I feel you. Suddenly, I'm aware of your presence. It's like, "How could have I done this?" Sometimes they'll be in a marriage. A woman or a husband develops a certain image of their spouse. And emotionally they become estranged for many years. And then one day, they open their eyes and they discover that it was nothing about the other person. The feeling then is one of profound pain and shame. And necessary pain and shame. Not a bad pain and shame. It's a necessary pain to be able to spit it out, to be able to say, "I'm embarrassed." To be able to say, "I'm agonized over the distortion, the blinders I was living behind, the cocoon I was stuck in and I couldn't get out of." Often, our entire relationship with God is based on that. Our relationship with Hashem remains the same like it was when we were seven or two or 14. And sometimes it was distorted from our own projections or insecurities, from certain religious experiences that we had, from certain perceptions, from certain teachings that were given to us, and we make an image of Hashem and And stays with us, and the rest of our life we're busy treating him like the greatest enemy and trying to appease him. Or as Churchill said, appeasement is we feed the shark with the hope that he will eat us last. And we're always looking for ways to get God a little better in a better mood. Before Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur, we'll go to shiurim that will tell us midda k'neged midda. If for the next 30 DAYS YOU DON'T TALK LASHON HARA, YOU MIGHT GET GOD IN a good mood. And if you get him in a good mood, midda k'neged midda, then the moment of judgment maybe maybe maybe ulay yerachem maybe maybe you'll catch him in a positive moment. But the definition is the natural state of mind is there is such a negative relationship. He's really out to get everybody. But there's certain rules we could manipulate, and if you do this for 40 days, and then you do that for 40 days, and if you call this person and you do that, and then you say this nine and a half kapitlach tillim between 9:00 and 9:30 a.m. when we know based on some ma'amar Chazal that somehow he's not in such a bad mood because it's after the gym before stress. And then maybe maybe maybe all the horrible decrees upon you will be wiped away. Now, you're supposed to be married to such a person, to such an entity? You can have a normal relationship with this? Imagine if your husband and yourself had this relationship. Status quo is he's out to kill you. But if 7:00 you prepare the right dinner, and it should be a nine-course dinner, and right when he COMES IN YOU CATCH him in that moment before he loses it, then midda k'neged midda, he will smile back, and maybe tonight you'll be safe. And you won't have to run to a shelter. Some for some people the whole Judaism works this way. And it's a horrible experience. It's a horrible experience. And what happens? No one even can imagine that there's another type of relationship because it's like becomes indoctrinated. I don't know of any other gods. So, David Hamelech says, "Let me talk about revenge for a moment." You know what his revenge is? His revenge is he's not going to pay back. He doesn't have to pay you back. Wholesome people don't even take revenge. Wholesome people don't take revenge. They do what they have to do sometimes to protect themselves. They have to protect society, but that's different than revenge. You know what his revenge is? His revenge is basically one day he's going to let you see who he really is. And that could be very, very deeply embarrassing in a very good way. It's like real cosmic divine therapy where you see reality for what it is. Ah. So, now come back with me to Vayichar Af Hashem B'Moshe. You remember? Translate the words and you'll see. Vayichar Af Hashem B'Moshe. Vayichar means "Es hat gebrandt." There was burning. There was a fire. Af is the fury, the anger, the wrath, the ire, the upsetness. Hashem of Hashem. The wrath of God burnt B'Moshe. Says the Kotsker translate, "What's B'Moshe?" Inside of Moshe. The wrath of Hashem began burning B'Moshe. Not at Moshe. Not against Moshe. In Moshe. What does this mean? It means as follows. At this point of the game, at this point I shouldn't say game, at this point of history, the Ribbono Shel Olam could not tolerate any more the Egyptian exile. It ate up on him K'Vayochol. He says, "V'gam Ani Shomati, I cannot be deaf to it anymore." Now, you'll ask a question, why till this point he could? These are the big questions of history, it's not for this class, nor do I have a real answer for it anyhow, even with 100 classes. But at this point, Hashem's wrath is burning against the situation in Egypt, the torture, the oppression, the savage suffering, the blood, the violence, the abuse of human rights, the slaughter of Jewish children, etc., etc. He summons Moshe and he says, Moshe, go and create the revolt. Moshe says, me? I'm a shepherd. I'm just a nice guy. I'm a meditator. I'm a meditator. I love nature. I love sheep. Sheep don't lie. You know that. I love water. I love grass. They're not corrupt. They're not the same Moshe was a very innocent person. He was very pure. Hashem says, I'll go with you. He says, I don't have a message for them. I don't know your name. I'll tell you the name. Moshe says, I can't talk. I'M NOT A COMMUNICATOR. I'm not a projector. I don't do that. My antennas are always facing up. Always up. And people whose antennas are always up have a hard time talking. Because all verbal communication is a compromise of intense energy. Because to take deep ideas and put them into words always requires what the Kabbalists call it tzimtzum, restrictive energy. Nafshi yotzei bedaber says Reb Tzaddok Hakohen, words always manage to kill the soul of the message. You all know you have an idea and it's burning in you and then when you say it, you just say I don't have the words. Yeah, I don't have the words. Why don't have the words? Because words are limited containers. And to be able to take intense light and to put it in through limited containers is a great art and a very difficult art and often, more often than not, unsuccessful. For words to convey the depth of an emotion is very difficult. Moshe says, "I'm not that man. I am not Mr. Projector." I don't I'm not a man of words. Better not lose It's not only because his tongue was burnt by the coal. There was a reason his tongue was burnt by the coal. The biological and the physical phenomenon is always a symptom of the spiritual. Moshe, by definition, his ears are always in tune to the music that flows from the infinite presence of the Ain Sof and therefore he's never in the mode of restrictiveness, which is necessary to communicate a message. So, Hashem says, "I create the mouth for people. I will give you your communication. It'll be a different type of communication." Moshe says, "They won't believe me." "They'll believe you." FINALLY, HE SAYS, "SEND SOMEBODY ELSE." WHAT DOES God do at this point? He can't convince Moshe. He can't convince him. What do you do? What do you do? You need Moshe for the job. He is the man. He is the Jew who is to do it. Why is he the man? The Ben Ezra says, "Because he grew up among non-Jews." Why did the first Jewish leader grow up among non-Jews? Do you know what they used to say in shul about Moshe when he became a leader? He doesn't even know what a shalom zachar looks like. He never ate chickpeas at a shalom zachar. Can you imagine? He doesn't know what jalapeno herring is. He doesn't know what sponge cake looks like. How can you be a Jew and not know what sponge cake looks like? He doesn't know what a bris is, what a bar mitzvah is, what an upsherinish is, what a chasanah is. Er ist heimish. Heimish, yeah, did I say it right? Okay, as nicht heimisch. He's a complete complete zuggekommener. He's a complete alien. He comes into the culture, he doesn't wear the same garment, doesn't speak the same language. How does this man become a leader? People, some of us in this room work so hard to fit in. For 20, 30, 40 years we do everything to fit in. And the moment somebody finds out about our background, we want to kill ourselves. Cuz God forbid for people to know truth. It may destroy all religion. Because what does religion have to do with truth? Religion is all about perception of what we are comfortable with. Here, the worst example was MOSHE RABBENU. THE WORST. MAMISH AN OUTSIDER. HIS FIRST SPEECH, THEY ASKED HIM, "WHICH yeshiva did you learn in?" You were in the Mir? Where were you? In Slabodka? In Ponevezh? And you were in Brisk? You weren't even in Brisk, really? Wow, that's not for my daughter. Sorry. But he was the first rabbi. He was the first leader. Trust me, he wouldn't be accepted today in any yeshiva with his background. Who's your father? Pharaoh. Who's your mother? Pharaoh's daughter. It's great. Which yeshiva did you go to? I never went to yeshiva. ASK DAVID EZER, "WHY?" SO DAVID EZER SAYS, "Soyd Hashem l'eirev." It's a secret. Then he says, "I'll tell you two reasons." Reason number one, listen to David Ezer. Reason number one is he said, "Jews don't know how to respect people who grow up among them." Every Yachna Yenta would look at MOSHE AND SAY, "I REMEMBER when you ran around in a pamper. You used to make your mother crazy. I still remember your bris." You ever do that to anybody? "I remember your bris." That's it. Moshe finishes his drasha and somebody says, "I remember you were a little baby. I remember I babysat for you." Everyone said, "I loved to babysit for you when you were a terror." So, how could he do his job every Yachna telling him she remembers him walking around without clothes? That's the one reason the Even Ezra says, "It's an expression, ain't no Viera. You can't be a prophet in your own city. Doesn't work. Too many people have stories on you." The Even Ezra said, "They have files, you know, a filing cabinet. Oh, we remember. Today he became Moshe. We know the real thing. We remember when he was 8 years old he was a brat." Then the Even Ezra says a second reason. Second reason he says is if he would have grown up among Jews, he would have had a slave mentality. And slaves cannot create revolutions. He had to grow up in aristocracy. He had to grow up in royalty. People who grow up in royalty have beretta hasogas. They think big. If he would have grown up among the Jews, sadly they were subjugated slaves. He would have thought like a slave. His mentality would have been a slave mentality. So, Moshe had to grow up among the king, the superpower monarch. So, he should be able to think big. His imagination was fertile for revolution. He was not mediocre. This is the interpretation of the Even Ezra. What a commentary. What a psychological insight about people who are not ready to be redeemed. Not because they're not ready, because they can't think big. Their entire weltanschauung is one of abuse and slavery. Battered situations are the status QUO. THEY DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT IT MEANS TO think with an infinite broadness and expansive consciousness. They can't even imagine a life devoid of oppression. How many people could liberate themselves, but they can't even imagine liberation. Not that they can't do it, they could. They can't even imagine such a life. Think about your own life. Some of us are stuck in situations not because you have to be stuck, cuz you can't even entertain the thought that your life can be better. That life can be happy. That life can be stress-free. That life can be liberated. Some of us feel in the deepest recesses of our soul that destiny of my life equals misery. Agony. Especially Shabbos and Yom Tov must be the two most miserable days, especially Erev Shabbos and Erev Yom Tov. And soon Purim is coming. The happiest day of the year with the beautiful luxury of preparing Shalach Manos for 299 friends in order to be able to have a Shalach Manos like everybody else. So, the happiest day of the year turns into the miserable day for hundreds of people. Why? They suck nash. But, that's how you have to do it. Purim has to be miserable. Okay? People can't even think differently. Think differently. So, now what happens here is Moshe is a royal aristocrat. So, God needs HIM, BUT HOW DO I GET HIM? THE MAN says he can't talk. Nobody's going to BELIEVE HIM. SEND SOMEBODY ELSE. HE HAS NOTHING TO SAY AND HE'S INCOMPETENT. There was one answer. The answer is va'yichar af Hashem b'Moshe. What Hashem has to do at this point is he needs Moshe to start experiencing his own wrath. Hashem's wrath about golus needs to be transplanted, inculcated, infused into Moshe's heart. The moment MOSHE FEELS GOD'S PASSION ABOUT GOLUS MITZRAYIM, then all excuses, all rationality, as legitimate as they are, fade into oblivion, because we all know, if you're passionate about something, you won't say, "I don't know how to talk. I'm embarrassed. Nobody likes me. Last time I opened my mouth, they made fun of me. I really have nothing to say." That's all true. You might have nothing to say. You might not be a good communicator, and people may make fun, but that's all because you don't have passion. If you have real passion, you transcend all of these calculations, not because they don't exist, because they don't matter. And suddenly, timid, shy people become giants. Why? Because something summoned them. A passion, a calling, a destiny summoned them. And then, no calculation stand in your way. So, the Chofetz Chaim once sends a delegation to the leader of Poland. There was a decree against schechita. They were planning a decree against slaughter, kosher slaughter. And he sends a delegation to speak to the prime minister. And they come back, and he says, "Nu?" And they say that the interpreter didn't show up. So, they speak Yiddish, and he speaks Polish, and the one that translate didn't show up. So, they couldn't really communicate. So, the Chofetz Chaim said, "Hot emitzegichalisht?" "Did anybody faint?" They said, "No, why would we faint?" He said, "Has emitzegichalisht vult verstanden?" "If somebody would have fainted, he would have understood." He didn't need a translator. A translator you need when you're communicating with words, not when you're communicating with your soul. The soul transcends language. "Vayechar The moment Moishe heart became ablaze with God's passion that it's time to liberate an abused, oppressed, broken, shattered people from savage cruelty, BARBARITY, and sadistic suffering. Now, suddenly, the great mystic the spiritual transcendental soul the higher sublime spirit called Moshe Rabbeinu shepherding the flock in the isolation of the desert in commune with Hashem himself, suddenly this person becomes a warrior a revolutionary molds up slave and enslaved people into a nation and overthrows the empire of his own grandfather. Appreciate what that means. Somebody raises you. Paroh raised him. Paroh's daughter was his mother for all practical purposes. He grew up by Paroh. Paroh paid for everything he had. Paid for his tuition. Paid for his expenses. He learned royalty from the palace. What guts does that take? He wasn't overthrowing a stranger. When he came to people don't realize when Moshe came to Paroh, you know he was coming to visit? He's coming to visit HIS ADA. SHALOM ALEICHEM. THIS MAN KNEW MOSHE AS A BABY. HE RAISED THIS KID. He sat on his lap. He fed him Cheerios when Batya was away. It was fine. It was raised dream milk. Don't worry. HE KNEW THIS KID. SUDDENLY, YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND HOW SHOCKED PAROH WAS? MY BABY. My baby suddenly is going TO OVERTHROW THE EMPIRE. BUT UNDERSTAND FROM MOSHE what that meant. Moshe didn't want to strike the water. Why? Hakaras Hatov, because the water protected him. And here he goes, his own father, his own grandfather, he destroys everything. What happened to Hakaras Hatov? The answer is when you're facing a Stalin and a Hitler who are taking Jewish children and throwing them into a Nile river, the greatest responsibility is to overthrow such evil and to say this is my Zayde, this is my father, you become an accomplice to the evil. Because this grandfather or this stepfather IS A CRIMINAL PAR EXCELLENCE, A TYRANT, A MURDERER, A DICTATOR. And if you have moral sensitivity and moral passion, YOU FIGHT. SO, what happens at this moment is Hashem lights a fire, I if I could say this way in what we would say in English in Moshe's, so to speak, Moshe inwards, in Moshe's in internally. And once your kishkes are on fire, once the belly is on fire, then nothing stops you. So, now come back to Kerishma. It's the same thing. We mistranslate it. You create new gods for yourself. Translate. Hashem's wrath will burn in you. The challenge here is that you're not seeing the world from his perspective. You don't see the world from your soul's perspective. You don't realize how MUCH IS AT STAKE in your life. You don't realize how much meaning there is in your thoughts, words, gestures, actions. You don't realize that you are the interlacing link between heaven and earth. That every move you make, every breath you take, ADVANCES THE COSMOS TOWARDS REDEMPTION or the other direction. To see yourself the way God sees you. To be able to see your significance, your value, your dignity, YOUR SENSUALITY IN THE DRAMA OF EXISTENCE and history, the way Hashem sees you. And whenever Torah speaks about these punishments, they're essentially instructive mechanisms to be able to alert a person to a deeper perspective on the self. BECAUSE "KEIL NEKAMOS HASHEM." WHAT TYPE OF NEKAMA DOES HASHEM TAKE? "Keil Nekamos Eifia." When he appears in your life, that you should be able to see yourself the way he sees you. Have a wonderful week. Anyone who This class is brought to you by the Yeshiva.net. Please help us continue the classes. 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