Transcript
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I can't tell you how many people I speak
to that they're again I don't want to go
into it but come from abusive homes or
come from whatever
situations and they're living their life
and they're literally going down the
road that their parents went down
literally reliving it every step of away
there's a couple I'm dealing with I turn
and have a couple of while ago and I
said to him I said it's it's this is
like so insane you both really love each
other you both really care if you owned
the gun you'd both be shooting each
other and yet you really love each other
but the craziest part about it is that
if I asked his wife to describe his
father and if I ask his wife to describe
him they describe the same exact person
right whereas if I would ask him to
describe his mother and i' would ask him
to describe his wife he described the
same exact person and when I turn
literally this was a conversation and I
turned to the wife and I say is he right
are you your mother she says yeah I said
do you want to be a mother she go no way
my mother had the most miserable life
the most miserable marriage she was
miserable I couldn't stand being in that
house and I turned to the guy I said do
you want to be your father he goes no
way my father had this trauma and that
trauma and he came from parents from the
Holocaust and papa again I'm not
knocking on the parents I'm giving you a
specific example that I see constantly I
don't want to be that I want to learn
great so why don't you stop the cycle oh
but you know what she said dude that's
what your father would say to me what
about you why aren't you stopping the
cycle wife why aren't you stopping the
cycle there is a cycle that goes on that
a father a grandfather be gives it over
to his father to the Father the father
gives it to the son the son gives it to
his son and it goes on and on and it
starts from Shimon and it goes all the
way down to midan where the same guy who
couldn't get control over his impulse
control problems and therefore wiped out
had a whole shet of children go and fall
to midan fall to B why because they
didn't have impulse
control so we can make a whole sheer
about impulse control that's not what I
want to do that's not what I want to
make about this I want to make about
this the
importance of not just being laxidasical
if somebody lived through something
don't think you're smarter you're
not don't think you're better you're not
you're going to repeat and do the exact
same thing unless you take steps to
change it to stop that
cycle to stop that cycle I saw a
beautiful clip a while back from a GU
but psychologist was explaining this
concept of a cycle going on
who I have absolutely no idea but you
can tell me if this is true cuz I don't
remember names and it was a white
guy I don't know but there are many old
white guys in the world side could be
and and he takes a cup right a glass cup
filled with blue water whatever and he
pours it into an empty cup he says this
is the grandfather he pours it into the
empty cup says this the blue is all the
trauma for the grandfather all the
negativity all the pain all the blah
blah blah blah and he goes and he pours
it into the next cup it's the exact same
thing he pass it over to son it just
continues same blue and then he goes
into the next cup pass it over and it it
doesn't dilute it continues straight
on until he came to one he says now this
is you what are you going to do he picks
up another empty Cup this is your child
what are you going to do are you going
to do this or are you going to do
something and he takes a Empty Glass not
an empty a full uh cup of water and he
starts pouring it in and then he pours
another and another until it gets
diluted and then he passes it over to
his
son you got to understand there is a
cycle there is a pass on that unless you
make steps to stop you will relive the
mistakes you will want 100% and again
I'm not this isn't a video to rip them
fathers ra Bo say honor the world this
isn't for you I don't even know if I'm
going to post this this isn't for you
this is a minan Shalom new video This is
for people who went through very
difficult lives whether it was your
father whether it was your Reby whether
it was you yourself whether it was
whatever the case may be do you want to
pass all your garbage onto your son or
not because if you don't do something
about it it's exactly what you're going
to do your son will become you your
daughter will marry you that is the
reality
