Be true to yourself! - Rabbi Alon Anava

[Music] so thank you very much vindy thank you very much welcome everybody it's a very very very special evening in a about an hour it's the yite of the Holy Theos theal so and my father's birthday so in an hour in an hour we can dedicate it for my father but tonight we I want to talk tonight about the nine days and how are they're connected to the building of the beta mikdash and how it's relating to us but with the request of the with the host a little very short intro about my personal story that I grew up like mindi said in Israel I grew up extremely extremely secular for the ones of you who know the Israelis who are very very secular I was number one I was pull pulling the the flag you know in our in our beautiful Tor we have a Minh that we say that you can take a Mitzvah and you can beautify the mitzvah mitvah so I would I would make sure that I do the sin exactly how it's supposed to do and that I'm annoying all my neighbors and that it's done with a stamp has the last laugh and in the year 2001 I I left Israel when I was 23 I came to the United States and I was 27 on a very special day was a Saturday Shabbat and it was yudal Nissan the morning of P the day that the Jews 3,300 years ago left their physical slavery into spiritual freedom and that's the very the day that it happened and I suffered cardiac Ares arrest as a result of drug poisoning in my blood my heart stopped for 7even minutes my n went out of my body went up to the Heavenly Court through a very long process till to get there and exactly how we read in theim exactly how we read in our sources every little thing was exactly how we learn and for whatever reason I don't want to ruin the surprise but the the result is obvious excuse me not all going uh for the ones of you who can go there are videos online I have CDs you can take audio video five minutes YouTube YouTube everywhere the thing is that to say 5 minutes is almost like coming to a doctor and telling him doctor after 15 years of learning and experience can you give me in like in 5 minutes the anatomy of the human being I can't it's a 15-year thing so so how's your English so my English is good my mother's Australian so I grew up learning talking in English even though I grew up in AR Israel I grew SP to I grew up speaking English and I lived here for 17 years so they kind that kind of polished it up and who's who's my kala my kala my wife she's American hasem she she grew up in America very secular and somewhere along the way she also made a u-turn a good U-turn made a good be if you can't really say the story in five minutes the the short version of the story is that I I I I died but how did they get you to the hospital well that's a long story the short version of the story My n left my body I was hovering over my body I saw the whole thing from above the entire physical structure of the world disappeared there was nothing physical everything was spiritual I was able to see everything I was able to read everybody's Minds I was able to see through walls beyond beyond words I was hovering over the body and ascending above my body and going higher and higher and higher and taking off and at some point I left the sphere of this world into the famous tunnel that everybody's talking about and through this tunnel experienc thousands of years of isolation and torture and till I got to the point that I understood that there's nothing about the Kos to a point that you you realize in this world there are two type of two types of realities and the first reality is called the truth and the second reality is called a lie and a person can create a lie in this world hide behind this lie and if he doesn't tell it to anyone that is the reality but this reality only works in this world in the world above there's no such a thing there's only one reality and that's called truth there's only one side to the coin and you cannot bend the truth and you cannot sugarcoat the truth and you cannot hide behind anything the truth is exactly how it is that's why our sages tell teach us don't even come close to a lie because if a person gets himself used to lying in this world which is one of the most sever sins he'll never get out of it because a lie right away brings birth to the next lie you can't end it with one and more than that at some point in the world to come if a person is used to lying all day long and that's his way out then at some point he's going to lose that off option and then what and if your entire life is just based on truth on a met okay even if it's embarrassing even if it's not so comfortable or convenient to share the truth but that's the truth and you deal with it and the problem with most people in our world is that they are not willing to deal with the reality with the truth so they hide it behind all sorts of fake realities and then they live a lie and then after 50 years they find out that they're living a life of 50 years and this is the worst attitude because leaves the body it doesn't have this reality he has to deal now with the truth and I understood and I knew that the only truth is only the not we say because there's nothing but the K and then after million years of suffering in this spere of Darkness I finally see this Godly light this unbelievable beautiful white Shining Light which was obvious that behind this light is the master of the universe tell You Now is really zooming through 5 hours of a lecture into 5 minutes it seemed like something pulled me into this slid in a split second I was connected to this source of information an endless amount of Godly wisdom was downloaded to me like as if I was connected to a main source of information all the wisdom of the world all the of the world and in that I see this panoramic picture of the entire world from the world day it was created till the the last day one long panoramic picture billions and billions of details all connected to each other everything that we see in this world that does not make sense nothing makes sense in this world you look at this world all you see is death Horrors diseases Terror attacks Holocaust hardship suffering that's what we see in this world here and there we see some good things very few people are able to see the good in the bad but the reality is to take any normal person he will tell you where's the this uh God that you're talking about that's supposed to be so good everybody's suffering here the point is that we only see a few pieces from the puzzle and it's like as if I saw all the puzzle together everything was geniusly planned unbelievable pleasure just to understand it but unfortunately I did not have the ability of what's called in the professional tense a vessel to hold this information so I had to be removed from there into even a greater place which I found myself completely completely naked of course naked from mitv there wasn't a body there and all the souls of all the Jews were around me standing like a ring looking at me which the feeling was unbelievable shame because everybody saw through me like a transparent Cup every thought that I ever had every word that ever came out of my mouth every action that I ever did was just open everybody saw it the feeling of Shame was not not even bearable was worse than the entire trip coming there worse than that it felt like I'm standing in front of the K it literally felt like the master of the universe told me what did you do wasn't fear wasn't afraid that I'm going to lift up my head and see some monster that's going to kill me or beat me up was shame cuz it felt like the master of the universe told me I sent you to this world with a list this long of things to do and a list this long of things not to do and everything I told you to do you did not do everything I told you not to do you did you messed it up and I knew they're about to take me to the next room and I was begging leave me here for eternity with this suffering just don't take me there sure enough they took me there and I found myself in this huge courtroom I know I'm in a courtroom I'm in a such a low level was considered in the Biblical term Rasha a wicked person that my eyes were like sealed I couldn't see what's in front of me but I knew I'm in a courtroom and amazing like the mishna teaches us when a person does a does a sin he creates himself a a catore a prosecutor and if you d mitah a Mitzvah you create yourself a sagol a defense attorney I don't even know where I had the I looked to my left and I see like rows like balion of these prosecutors these scary scary angels for everything that I ever did and I don't even know where I had the nerve I look to my right and I see two differ attorneys one was crippled the other one was blind wasn't so funny then and at this point they're showing me the movie of my life they're taking me back into my body in a very weird way cuz I'm in my body but I see myself and they're showing me the movie of my life slow motion 27 years of a slow motion Movie and everything is pointed out he Resto he relied he re cheated he Rec cursed you pushed you did you took 27 years of a horror mod because they're showing me every little act that I ever did every thought that went through my mind every word that came out of my mouth and all the souls of all the Jews are standing there including you and every person that I ever hurt is standing next to me screaming at me and every person that I ever stole from is standing there at some point they were telling me listen I mean there only bad they tried to gather all the good things they pulled out a few mitv here and there but the the the the ratio was like 999999 bad and 0.0 nothing good which at this point they basically just gave me two options either you go back to this Mal that brought you here or you go back down to this world and if you choose to go back down to this world then it comes with conditions you have to do this and this and that you have to be a living living your life like a Jew Jew they didn't tell me what's a Jew they didn't tell me they didn't tell me that they told me Jew to make me understand that here in this world we segregate ourselves and we don't like each other cuz I say o and he says oh and he wears his suit like this and he wears the jacket like that and everybody hates each other they tell me Jew because Lala everybody's the same of course they told me I have to pay my debts 27 years of sins and I had to tell it to everybody and I'm not going to ruin the end but of course the end is that they push me down this this world my eyes woke up in this world after going through this what I told you now is not even not even a DOT of the entire story which needless to say two years later the transformation so this is the real short version of it the ones who can make it for tonight you can hear it on MP3 you can see it on DVD you can see it on YouTube on iTunes on Soundcloud everywhere the CDs wherever you want you can see it needless to say that a live lecture is not even a close to listening to it only for the fact that in a live lecture you can ask questions you can debate more than that you see my expression and more than that this is what people do not understand that's why I refused for many years to do videos and audios and stuff like that because when you're sitting in the room with me there are all the souls they get together and this is the power of the live session because on a screen you see a screen it's dead it's flat but when you're sitting in a room there is a connection between the souls and the soul is already getting the injection so I don't have to say much I just have to sit and you already get it by Wi-Fi so I definitely urge you to come tonight much better than anything else that you're planned for tonight if not then I don't know if there's going to be any more chances to hear it live here in America because mashiah is coming you can come and listen to it in Israel bem but I definitely urge you to come and if you can then listen to it online in any format that you want want after that I have hundreds of videos online of people asking me questions and different topics because B is's no way to describe and even what you hear online for 3 4 hours is not even a fraction of the entire thing besides the fact that 90% of what I remember and saw there's no words to even describe it you can't even put it into words what we call in the in our terminology let to contract it into something that my mind can actually understand it's almost like telling a 2-year-old a mathematical equation and trying to explain it to him doesn't even know what you're talking about but the point is not to get too many details once I used to give sour lectures people would be like already fainting on the floor but you give too much information the person leaves with with a mess in their mind so I narrow it it down the point is not how much information you take is what you take out of the lecture but if you were raised to go anti could you be held accountable for the things you did if you were taught that like you know Orthodox or whatever that that religion is disgusting and you know religious people are gross and of all that stuff yeah I tell you the thing is this is the most common question that I get the million dollar question and everybody says it's not your fault you're no you weren't raised not let's say you look at the Arabs and they hate the Jews but they raed to hate the Jews so I'll tell you what was my problem there are two types of ways to do a sin between me and and between one person to another person they did not show me that I was cooking on Shabbat or ripping letters on Shabbat or driving on Shabbat they did not show me what they didn't know but you know what they showed me you stole that you don't have to be a Jew even to figure out that stealing is bad you don't have to be a Jew so much more so a Jew but you need common sense so they showed me everything stealing lying cheating mocking laughing all these things I was the bully of the class I would mock people for for to get just for the fun of it so some things yes you're not accountable for cuz they tell okay you know besides the fact there's a saying in the Israeli Army the fact that you didn't know still you still get the the the the punishment so it's almost like you know the here in New York you park in the wrong place they give you a ticket you tell the the policeman but I didn't know I don't care if you the know you park you get the ticket in our Tora you see the example here that if a person Shalom desecrates Shabbat by mistake by mistake still has to give a Corban why cuz there's still a blemish done still some type of a damage and the easiest way to explain it imagine how you go you see a little kid a three-year-old kid goes into the kitchen opens the fridge looks all the way up sees like the the chocolate pudding all the way up starts climbing the the the the shelves pull out the pudding and as he pulls it out the whole fridge is on the floor the mother comes into the room assuming that she's a normal mom she doesn't scream and she doesn't lose it and she she doesn't hit the kid she doesn't punish the kid she doesn't do anything she's like I understand it was a mistake a normal man mom she's like I understand it was a mistake but you clean up the mess so they come to you in the shim and say listen we understand it wasn't it wasn't your fault but clean up the mess you made a mess so something it's completely not your fault so you're completely clean but Theon in the sh the din in the Sham is accurate so you can't that's what I said before you can't hide behind a lie so you can't come and say oh I really didn't mean that we know what you meant so this is the problem that people think that someday in sh they can bend Corners you can't so the Torah tells you one thing and then there's things that okay that you don't have to learn the Torah to know not to cheat and not to steal and not to mock and not to curse and not to do all these things so yeah a lot of things they didn't show me but you know what they also show me what I missed what I could have gained and this is the worst feeling you know people come constantly asking what's G is that really fire do you really bar they get barbecued there you know what's the real G they say that the Ganan is a pillar of light K is standing in the middle K is compared to light we seen many different types of teachings that Kosh is called or so the stands in the middle the closer you are to the light the more you benefit the more you derive the more you enjoy the further away from the light you go into darkness that's your G you're just not close to the party it's almost like going to to a concert of your favorite band and you're all the way at the end you can hear what what you're going to a lecture of your favorite Rabbi and there's no speaker and you're sitting all the way like I can't hear a word from what he's saying so Gom is not a barbecue but sometimes depends each individual individual is different but sometimes by them showing you you could have gained that you want to tell me that 5 minutes of wearing T this what I would get yeah you want to tell me that reading another two capital of this is what I would be able to achieve yeah so burning on the inside it's not about burning it's almost like it's almost like you buy the with $1 the billion doll lottery ticket and then somebody comes and tells you I'll give you $1,000 for that ticket of course here I just bought it for a dollar and the next day that's the billion dollar ticket and you're like I couldn't I I I I I could have won the billion dollars and I I I sold it for $1,000 so it's not necessarily that they yeah a person who has Torah it's even worse cuz you already know it's a whole different category but with me they didn't show me and things like this they show me the little things honoring your parents you don't have to be a genius to honor your parents you don't have to be a genius to be a mench let's put it this way so they showed me listen Okay so we we're not categorizing you as a Ben T but you had to be such a a not nice guy so that's the problem that the de that the Judgment in shamim is 100 100% and unfortunately in our generation people like to sugarcoat things and present it Ah that's a very bad attitude because then the Nisha will come and say hey why didn't you tell me 100% the truth that's not fair tell me 100% the truth I'll do it don't don't round corners so the problem is that we have to be true to ourselves and we constantly lie to ourselves that's the problem with most people that they constantly lie to themselves I mean you can lie to anyone you want but you can't lie to the Kosh and you can't lie to yourself you can convince yourself certain things but if you look in the mirror you cannot light yourself you know the truth so if you want to live the right life then you be honest with yourself 100% not 90% 100% [Music] a [Music]